Chapter 14 Mischa #4
“One of the groups only has three people instead of four, so I can sneak you in that one,” he tells me. “It’s the last free spot for the day, and it starts in fifteen minutes, so you’ll have to run down there.”
I buy the ticket and pass William heading down the hill and grab his map.
“I need to find the koalas like, now,” I explain. “I’m crashing on some other group and...”
“I need that ticket, Mischa,” he interrupts. “What do you want for it? I’ll give you literally anything. I’ll give you my watch, my Maserati, I’ll give you my fucking house.”
“Is this some weird rich-boy flex?” I ask.
“If I have to beg you, I will.”
I do hate William. He is an asshole. He did have a broken bottle to my jugular a week ago.
He cheats on that girl and rubs it in her face.
I want to say no. It’s just hard because it’s obvious he wants it a thousand times more than I do.
And because he’s devoted to Austen, and despite now hating him, I’m still madly in love with him.
“I’ll give it to you,” I say, “but you owe me a favor. Not one of these modern favors, an old-time, blood-oath, illogical, dangerous favor.”
“The best kind,” he smiles.
We shake on it, and he takes the ticket.
“You better run,” I tell him. “It’s in ten. Andale andale, arriba!”
He’s delighted, and kisses me on the cheek with a loud MWAH!
I laugh in surprise, and he runs off. He heads down to Austen and shows him the ticket.
Austen jumps in his arms and William lifts him off the ground.
I feel a slight twinge of envy that is about to explode into full-scale regret.
Austen takes the ticket, and William’s arm, and they run off as fast as they can to find the Australia section.
I head that way too, and pass the wallabies and wombats. The Koala experience is over in four artificial tree platforms, staffed by four koalas and their handlers. Each platform has a small walkway to get to it. Austen is waiting with William behind a group of three Chinese tourists.
Just before Austen’s turn, he commits what could be described as a ‘public display of affection’.
It’s very brief and nobody is really around or watching them except Isobelle, Sabrina, and me, down below.
For a moment, Austen is standing very very close to William, talking animatedly, like a child.
They move into each other’s arms. Long hug.
Austen runs his hand through William’s hair, and whispers something in his ear and kisses him.
For someone who doesn’t like being touched, that’s a lot of touching.
They break apart and William runs his hand up and down Austen’s back, and I want to fucking scream.
Look, obviously Austen has got a big thing for koalas and he’s excited.
Obviously I’ve rubbed my sister’s back and kissed her a bunch of times.
I even slept at the base of her bed like a dog until last year.
I’m not saying what I’m seeing is weird.
It pisses me off that William gets to be there instead of me.
It enrages me that Sabrina will be there too and I will never be in the picture.
I think Austen has already forgotten me.
At Luna Park they are inseparable too. In their own world.
Happy for sure. But different. William is usually always so cold and aloof and Austen’s always so withdrawn and shy.
Now they are warm and present, fun and outgoing.
It’s beautiful, but so far from what I know of them.
They’re also hanging out with Amelia and a couple of the other students too.
Before, Austen was furniture, and Will only talked to the girl he was trying to fuck that day.
Maybe it’s having their girlfriends here.
Shit. That’s probably it.
From time to time for the rest of the day, William rubs Austen’s back, or tousles his hair.
Every time he does I want to chop his fucking hand off.
On the Ferris wheel they are with Sabrina and Isobelle.
They reach the top and take photos and Austen kisses William on the forehead.
Will throws his arms around Austen so he loses balance and their carriage teeters back and forth and they shriek with laughter.
Later I watch them share a bowl of hot chips covered in ketchup and it may as well be another public display of affection.
There’s only one thing making my superpower twinge.
Austen keeps staring at William. It’s only an affectionate look when William is looking back, but when he’s not, Austen’s expression is deathly.
The kind smile, all the happiness, seems like it’s just a performance for Will.
I think Austen is not actually happy, just manipulating William for some reason. Yikes.
The whole UMass group decides to get a photo together. William and their girlfriends surround Austen, but someone suggests the girls move forward.
“The tallest should go at the back, and the rest of us at the front.”
Kai stands on Austen’s side, and is about to move closer when Isobelle and Sabrina pull me over and put me beside Austen.
“The three tallest should be in the middle,” Sabrina explains.
We all move in closer for the photo. He puts his arm over my shoulders and I put mine around his waist. Will’s arm is over Austen’s shoulder too.
We get the photo and then everyone breaks apart and wanders off.
I am certain those two girls moved me over to Austen so he wouldn’t have to touch anyone else.
They know me and Austen have a thing and they are. .. I don’t know... tolerating it?
I’m emotionally exhausted. I decide to leave, but as I head to the exit, Sabrina stops me.
“You’re leaving?” she asks. “You want to get a photo in the booth with Austen before you go?”
“What?” I ask her.
“Baby,” she grabs Austen’s arm, “you don’t have one together with Mischa.”
“Do you want to?” Austen asks me.
“I mean... I guess.”
She pulls us into the photo booth and gets out, closing the curtain behind her. Austen pushes the buttons.
The first photo snaps and we’re looking ahead.
“We should do a pose,” he says, and the second flash takes us looking at each other.
There’s a heavy pause. I never want to see him again, but I want to kiss him more than I want to breathe.
It’s all I’ve thought about for a week, that one by the campfire at Uluru.
The one that made my hands shake and my knees wobbly.
If the kiss in the tent was closure, would another kiss open it back up again?
Maybe he has read my mind, because he leans in at that moment.
I don’t even know it’s going to happen until it does.
His mask falls and a proper kiss takes its place.
The camera flashes. I don’t pull away; it’s nice.
The camera flashes again. He hears people outside, and pulls away and looks at me like he’s surprised at what he just did.
“Sorry,” he says.
The booth prints out two copies. I hand them both to Austen.
“You probably want to incinerate these,” I say.
“I don’t. I’m apparently a part of you so I don’t think you are going to sell them to the tabloids.”
“Thanks,” I tell him. “Keep one.”
“It was a lovely kiss,” he says, and folds it together.
“Well, I can give you another one.”
Isobelle is watching. Sabrina is pulling William towards a carnival game to win her a stuffed animal.
I hear her call him honey, but I don’t give it much thought in the moment.
Austen wants to say something to me but doesn’t.
Instead he presses his lips together and rejoins his group.
He hugs Sabrina, kisses her on the top of her head, and puts the incriminating photo in her purse.
WAIT, WHAT? Then he walks with his arm over Isobelle’s shoulder, and William holds Sabrina’s hand.
What. The. Fuck?
It’s like their girlfriends are interchangeable. I look at the photo. In the third photo his eyes are open, but in the fourth, they are not. I need to scrub my brain with a pineapple.
I get on a fucking boat to the hotel, and go to my room, drink the minibar dry, and lie on the floor until the heat of the day gets too much.
Then I head to the hotel pools with a forty-ounce of zubrowka and get in the spa.
The bottle has a spout-pour on the top so I can give myself shots straight from the bottle.
Do William and Austen show up? Yes. Yes they do. And they head straight for the spa and get in with me. Their insanely hot girlfriends arrive shortly after. I don’t pay any attention to any of them. I don’t even say hello. I stare at the bison on the drink label and pretend they don’t exist.
“You got the grass vodka?” William asks. “I love that shit.”
I don’t want to share with him. I want to strangle him.
“Knock yourself out,” I say, and hand it over.
William pours a shot in his mouth.
His redhead girlfriend, Isobelle, comes over and whispers in my ear, “Stop sulking or I’ll kick you in the balls.”
I am suddenly a lot more alert. Isobelle giggles and moves back over to Will. Creepy fucking bitch.
“No more,” Austen says to Will and confiscates the bottle.
“Did you enjoy today?” Sabrina asks, sitting in Austen’s lap.
“Delightful,” I sigh. “And now I’m going to drink myself into a coma.”
Sabrina and Isobelle take shots and comment on the taste. They like it, and have more. After a while it becomes too hot for the girls, and they drag William into the main pool. Sabrina steals a quick glance over at me as they pull William from the spa. I glower back at her.
Austen stays behind. I do not look up or acknowledge him at all. I sulk. Under the water he touches the top of my foot with his toes.
“I didn’t say thank you.”
“You gave Sabrina our photo,” I frown. “What if she sees it?”
“I don’t care if she sees it.”
“Is she a gold-digger, a beard, or both?”
He shakes his head. “You just seemed upset so I kissed you, so what? Sabrina won’t care.”
“Both,” I huff.
“We’re sort of… in an open thing.”