Chapter 41
“Caleb?!” I spin, greeting him over-enthusiastically.
He doesn’t reply. He drops down in the chair across from me, jostling the table with his excessive muscles and frightening facial features. His eyes are on mine, a silent dismissal for Leah.
“I, uh,” Leah clears her throat, “have that appointment soon. I should go. But call me, okay?”
“Of course.” I offer her a side hug and a silent plea to not leave me with this man who looks ready to rip my head off.
She doesn’t get the message. I really need to work on my telepathy.
I wait until she’s gone before addressing the elephant at my table. “So, fancy meeting you—”
“I told you not to leave your room,” he barks. “I told you not to go anywhere, without me.”
I take a deep breath. “I had to talk to Leah, and I didn’t want you to jump the gun and arrest her.”
His gaze turns icy. “Because I make a habit of handcuffing people without at least waiting for an explanation. What were you thinking, Amelia? What if she had been the killer? What if she had a gun in her handbag and forced you to leave with her?”
That is…a very good thought I had not considered. “I knew she was innocent.”
He locks his jaw and stands, hauling me up with him. “You can never know that.” He drags me away from the table.
“My food!” I whine.
“I’ll buy you more. When you’re in your room. Which you won’t leave again until Liam is behind bars.” He stomps out of the cafe, pulling me along behind him, a bit too aggressively.
“Ow,” I mutter.
He releases me like I burned him and puts a foot between us. “I’m sorry, Amelia.” The guilt on his face is more pronounced than it should be. He’s scared to hurt me.
“It’s fine,” I say quickly, following him across the street.
“No, it’s not.”
The tension between us is an extra person on the sidewalk and people dodge around the three of us like we are carrying a deadly disease. Every step feels like a mile. We enter the hotel lobby and he falls behind, probably to ensure I don’t try to run away again. A bellboy shoots the brooding giant behind me a funny look but makes no effort to intervene on my behalf.
I hit the elevator button and wait, tapping my shoe with impatience. I can’t handle this kind of silent contention. The elevator dings and I step inside; Caleb follows. I feel every inch of his presence behind me. I want to lean in and run far away at the same time. The doors close us in silence and I can’t take it.
“If you want to say something, just say it.” I whirl on him.
His frown deepens and he steps around me, hitting a button on the keypad. The elevator stops.
He spins around, trapping me against the wall of the elevator with a hand on either side of my body. My hands find his chest and I can feel his racing heart beneath my right palm and his quick breaths against my neck.
He grabs my face with two hands, a slight tremor in them. “I told you not to go anywhere without me,” he says, but the torment in his eyes begs a hundred more pleas on his behalf.
My knees buckle as the impact of his words floods my veins with an irresistible warmth.
“It isn’t safe.” His voice is so low I can barely make it out above the pounding of my heart. “And I need you safe, Amelia.”
It’s so close to I need you, Amelia.
“Nothing would have happened.” I try to comfort him.
He clenches and unclenches his jaw. “You don’t know that. You see the good in people, but I’ve witnessed the bad. I was so scared when I couldn’t find you.” His hand moves to cup my chin and his thumb brushes my bottom lip. “So scared.”
His lips land on mine, scorching every inch of my body with the barest touch. I was made for this man. I feel it in every breath of his kiss. And he was made for me. Even if he can’t admit it out loud. For now, I’ll take what he can offer.
I drag my hands through his hair, tugging him closer to deepen the kiss. He presses me harder into the wall of the elevator. He’s rough and tender at the same time. Biting and caressing. Afraid to hurt me, but unable to restrain himself. I love this version of him: the one that’s kind of lost, the one that doesn’t have everything under control, the one that is starting to crack, allowing me entry into his sacred soul. But as fast as the fissure opens it closes. He spins away and hits a button, making the elevator move again.
“I can’t let you get hurt, Amelia. I won’t.”
“You can’t make that promise.”
“Yes, I can.”
I know what he’s saying. He won’t be the one to hurt me. But he already is.
He doesn’t look at me again as the elevator doors open and he leads us to our rooms. When he gets to mine he doesn’t wait for me to invite him in, he walks in and sits at the desk, then stares at me.
I cross my arms over my chest. “What?”
“I guess I’m going to have to keep my eyes on you since I can’t trust you not to leave this room.”
There goes my high from that kiss in the elevator.
He can’t trust me? He’s the one who always walks away. Is he comparing me to his father right now, always leaving him? I know this is different, but that’s what his accusation feels like. His dad didn’t know what he was walking away from. But I know what’s waiting for me when I return. A man who is passionate and patient. A man who wants the best for me but doesn’t know he deserves the same.
“I’ll always come back,” I whisper.
“Not if you’re kidnapped or killed,” he retorts. “So I’m staying right here.”
Yesterday I would have been thrilled about this declaration. But today it only proves how different we are. I agree I shouldn’t have left. It was stupid, but I genuinely thought I was doing the right thing by Leah.
I don’t think he will ever trust me, case or no case, and I’m beginning to take it personally. “I don’t think so, Dad.”
I kick off my shoes, launching them across the room at him. He doesn’t even flinch as they sail past his face. “I told you to stay. You didn’t listen.” His tone is clipped and harsh.
I roll my eyes. “You said I could help with the case, and I was working on a lead. I cleared Leah’s name. You should be thanking me.”
“She wasn’t even a suspect! Time of death puts Justin dying before she even arrived.”
“Well, that was rude of you for keeping that information to yourself.”
He raises a single brow.
Okay. I get it.
I chew on my bottom lip. “So, uh, how much of my conversation with Leah did you hear?”
“Enough.”
“Well, she said she could see Justin from the front door. When I got there the door and the shower curtain were both closed. That means the killer was still there. Maybe we can—”
“You’re not a cop Amelia!” Caleb shouts. “You’re a hairdresser. Stick to what you know and think things through for once. I don’t need or want your help with this.” Of all the things he could have said to me, this one hurts the most. And I see the regret in his eyes the second the words leave his mouth because he knows it too. I believed I wasn’t too much for him, but I am.
“I didn’t—”
“Leave.” I cut him off.
He shakes his head, spreading his body out on the chair and taking up too much space in the room, and in my heart. “I’m staying.”
“Fine, then I’ll leave.” I turn to go but his next words stop me.
“I’ll follow you.”
I pinch my eyes closed. He’ll follow me because he has to. Not because he wants to. Because he may like kissing me, but he doesn’t want anything more. He’s not falling for me.
I’ve learned enough about myself in the last couple of weeks to know I deserve someone’s unconditional love. And I won’t settle until I find it because I finally know my worth. I’m happy with who I am.
Even as I think it, I know there are probably better options, but none are coming to mind right now. I need him out of here so I can break down in peace and this is my last option.
I reach for the hem of my shirt.
“What are you doing?” Caleb barks.
“Changing. Since I’m not allowed to go anywhere, I think I’ll go back to sleep and if you are determined to babysit me, you can stay and watch.” I lift the shirt halfway to prove I’m not kidding.
His shoulders slump, and he trudges to the door. “Fine. But I’m going to be in the hall. Don’t get any ideas.”
“Wouldn’t dream of it, Agent Harris.” I lock the door behind him. Then I collapse onto the bed.