Chapter 29
Chapter
Twenty-Nine
ZEPHYR
They’re drenched in blood. I’ve never seen something so disturbingly terrifying in my entire life. The way blood is smeared over Matty’s face suggests that it’s actually from his hands. Since his hands were all over Darwin, I have a feeling it’s not Matty’s blood but Darwin’s.
But the blood running down Darwin’s face? That’s all his.
Matty does very well to help me sit Darwin in a chair. If Darwin is conscious at all, I can’t tell. I lean his head against my stomach and watch as Liam peels off his clothes.
“What’re you doing?”
“Getting rid of as much of the contamination as I can,” Liam answers. “Don’t touch his head. If he gets an infection… we don’t have much here for that.”
My hands drop to Darwin’s face to keep his head from falling one way or the other.
“I put my hat on his head,” Matty says. He’s trying so hard to keep it together. “I’m sorry. I’m—”
Liam cuts him off by kissing him. “You did good, baby. I’m so proud of you. You did the right thing.”
“But you said—”
“Shh,” Liam tells him gently. “Go take your clothes off and wash. We need to rotate through the shower and get as much of the dirt and outside off our bodies so we don’t give Darwin an infection. Okay? Wash thoroughly.”
Matty nods. He looks at me, and I try to smile. “I’m proud of you,” I tell him. “You saved him.”
He doesn’t answer as he walks to the shower. Liam watches him for a minute before meeting my eyes.
“I really need you to be clean before I uncover his head,” Liam says.
He’s not wrong. I know that. But I’m having a difficult time letting Darwin go. What if I’m not here and he stops breathing?
“Look at me,” Liam says, and I meet his eyes. He’s blurry. “We’re going to do everything we can, but you can’t be something that’s an obstacle to making sure he lives, Zeph. Get in the shower. Wash. Okay?”
He gently takes Darwin’s weight from where it’s leaning on me. I don’t answer. I’m afraid of what my voice is going to sound like if I do. Reluctantly, I turn away, rip my clothes off, and join Matty in the shower.
Together we wash. We make sure the other is completely clean before we get out, leaving the water on for Liam.
I don’t dry off as I return to where I was standing. “Hold on. I set out the peroxide and a roll of gauze.” He nods toward the counter.
I turn and nod.
“Soak the bandage and then come here. I need to get the hat off and get him cleaned as soon as possible, but I don’t want to touch him.”
Taking a breath, I do as he says. My hands are surprisingly steady. With a nearly dripping gauze, I turn back to Liam. He carefully adjusts Darwin to rest against me and then instructs Matty to carefully remove his hat from Darwin.
It sticks to the wound, and Matty nearly has a meltdown.
He cries the entire time he works to pull it free, but manages to get it off.
Liam gives me detailed instructions on how to move Darwin’s hair so we can all see the wound.
It’s not facing me. Matty turns his head.
Liam examines what he can and then has me cover it with the gauze.
He meets my eye. “I’m going to get in the shower. Can you handle this for a minute?”
I nod.
“Matty. Baby, go stand with Zeph,” Liam says, and urges Matty to stand in front of Darwin so I can wrap my arm around him, too. He’s shaking. His shaking makes me tremble too.
“I tried to get there as fast as I could,” Matty says. “Was I too late?”
I don’t answer. I don’t have the answer. I hold him tightly instead.
Liam isn’t long in the shower. Even though the three of us are naked, we don’t bother to get dressed as Liam returns to attend to Darwin. I think we’re all startled when Darwin curses and tries to pull away from Liam.
“Fuck,” he hisses and raises his hand. Matty and I reach for his hand at the same time, preventing him from touching the wound that Liam is cleaning. “That hurts,” Darwin grunts.
“You’re alive!” Matty says and drops to a crouch in front of him so he can look into Darwin’s face.
Darwin sighs. “I feel like death. My head is ready to explode.”
“I’ll give you some ibuprofen in a minute,” Liam says. “I’m almost done cleaning this.”
“Is it bad?” I ask.
“Not as bad as it could be, which you wouldn’t know because of all the blood. The head bleeds a lot. The wound is actually pretty clean, like someone sliced through his scalp,” Liam answers. “It’s a long wound, which also adds to the amount of blood, but it’s already slowed.”
We’re quiet as Liam continues to clean and then moves on to sutures.
As much as I hate that Darwin’s hurting, I’m relieved to feel him wince and hear him grunt.
I’m thankful that I hear his breathing and watch as his hands grip Matty’s tightly.
Probably painfully. I feel his muscles flex and hear his hiss.
Finally, Liam is finished. “Okay. I hope you don’t mind some company in the shower, but we need to keep the sutures dry while still washing your hair and the rest of you.”
Darwin shakes his head. “I’d like some pain reliever.”
“I hesitate to give you something that’ll put you to sleep. From what the ghosts say happened, I suspect you might have a concussion,” Liam says.
“I need some pain relievers, or I’m going to get really ugly,” Darwin states. “My head fucking kills me.”
Liam studies Darwin for a long minute before meeting my eyes.
I hope he’s not looking at me for guidance here.
He’s lucky I’m holding it all together right now.
I feel like screaming and raging and just…
losing my shit. The fear in my chest hasn’t let go.
If anything, it’s gripping harder now that Liam suggested he has a concussion.
After another minute, Liam concedes. He opens one of the pain-reliever packs in the first aid kit and hands it to Darwin, but Matty snatches it from his hand.
“You’re gross,” Matty tells Darwin. “No offense. Just open your mouth.”
Darwin snorts quietly but does as he’s told. He lets his head fall back as he swallows it whole, and I meet his eyes. My breath catches because he looks like he was dipped in fucking blood.
“Come on,” Liam says. “Help him get up. Matty, turn the water back on. Take the nozzle down though.”
Matty does as he’s told, and together, we get Darwin to his feet. He’s unbalanced. The way he bows his head tells me he’s probably dizzy. It’s precarious as we wash him and try to keep his sutures dry. Afterward, we wash again to get the new blood off us.
When he’s out, Darwin pokes his eyes and takes his contacts out, dropping them in the toilet to flush away. “I’m not exactly blind like this, but my vision is blurrier than usual,” he says.
“I’ll help you to the bedroom,” Matty says.
“Go to yours, Matty,” Liam says as he wraps Darwin’s head to keep the outside away from his new sutures. “Your bed is probably the cleanest.”
Matty nods. Liam stays behind and cleans up the bathroom. I hover in the doorway as I watch Matty and Darwin, naked, make their way to the stairs. They’re going to catch a virus with their bare feet on the stone floor.
Liam’s hand rests on my hip for a second, and I look over my shoulder to meet his eyes. “He’s going to be okay.”
“You said he has a concussion.”
“I said he might. Matty’s the best person to stay with him, because his ghosts will alert us if something is wrong.”
“You seem to think they’re magic in death.”
“Aren’t they?” Liam asks, one corner of his mouth lifts. “Matty was sitting at the castle, Zeph. He was almost a mile away from where Darwin was headed. Somehow, those ghosts got Matty to him in time to save his life.”
I close my eyes. My fear won’t let me go. I want to fall apart.
Liam’s hand tightens on my hip before letting me go. “What do you need right now?”
“To set their island on fire,” I grit out.
“Mm. That’s not a tonight project. But I agree with that assessment. This needs to end now. But what do you need right now? Do you need to scream? Do you need to hit something? Do you need to set something on fire?”
My brain is at least marginally convinced that Darwin is out of the woods because I’m shaking. No longer am I frozen in a state of fear. I turn to face Liam, not really sure what I need right now.
He’s naked. Just as the rest of us are. My eyes scan his body. He’s a good enough looking man. My opinion of a person tends to affect how I view them. I’m guessing my opinion has changed a bit from a month ago. He’s no longer a monster.
It’s probably thanks in large part to him that Darwin will wake up tomorrow.
“You need to fuck someone?” Liam asks.
I press my lips together. My muscles are still caught in that fight-or-flight mode. Coiled and ready to spring. I nod. I need to do something to let the energy loose, or I’m going to lose my mind.
Liam stops what he’s doing and nods in the direction of the door. “Come on.”
I don’t question him. I follow him out of the room and upstairs. The stone is fucking cold on my bare feet, but I don’t care. I’m frozen all over. Everything within me is frozen. I think fear is going to be my best friend for quite some time.
We end up in my room. Liam takes a minute to put more wood on the fire to stoke up the flames and then turns to me. “How do you want me?”
It sounds like a really intimate question. It should be somewhat seductive, right? Closing my eyes, I shake my head. “Actually, I need you to fuck me, I think.”
I’ve surprised Liam, but he nods. “Okay.”
On my way to my bed, I point at the nightstand, though I’m sure he knows that’s where my shit is.
I lie on my bed on my stomach, adjusting my body so my legs are spread.
I feel Liam behind me. I feel his body weight making the bed dip between my legs.
His fingers press between my ass cheeks and against my hole.
Closing my eyes, I take a deep breath as he sinks them inside.
Two, I think. I try to concentrate only on what he’s doing and force my muscles to release the tension.
Liam takes his time, though it’s unnecessary.
Darwin fucked me yesterday. Midday, I think.
It hasn’t been that long since there’s been a dick in my ass.
Maybe he needs that long to convince himself he’s into this.
His fingers leave my body, and he shifts. I hear the condom unroll. I hear the squelch of lube. The bed shifts as he adjusts behind me and then over me. Helping him with more room, I lift one of my knees so he has a little more access to my ass.
Liam’s body comes down on mine, and his blunt mushroom tip presses to my hole right away. There’s no slipping and sliding as he looks for the right spot. Like a magnet, he’s right there. My breath leaves my body as his cock pushes inside.
Well, fuck. I didn’t think it’d feel that good. Maybe I just need to be fucked, and the cock itself doesn’t matter.
Maybe I’m just being an ass, and Liam has a nice dick.
He covers me with his body, and his hips lift, bringing his cock outside my body entirely. His tip hovers just outside my hold. Then he punches back inside me. A deep, intense thrust that has a sound ripping from my throat.
Worse, something in my chest cracks, and I struggle to breathe.
This is how he takes me. He’s not fast. He doesn’t fuck me like an anonymous hookup. There’s no mindless, selfish rhythm.
Each thrust is deep, purposeful. A sharp snap of his hips.
His cock skims against my prostate, but even the pleasure that generates from that isn’t what has my entire body shaking.
I’m not prepared for everything he dislodged in my chest. My emotions feel like they’re locked inside a steel ball made solid from intense pressure to lock them away.
Every thrust of his cock slams into it. The cracks that run through it get bigger and bigger. Pieces begin chipping away. Tears fill my eyes as I try to contain everything locked up inside me. I nearly tell him to stop. To let me go. I can’t. I can’t face it all.
But one more deep penetration and it’s all dislodged. The pent-up emotions I’ve buried for as long as I can remember—anything too intense, anything too personal, anything that hurts too much—suddenly shatters and I begin sobbing.
Liam’s arms tighten around me, holding me to him as he continues to take my body and release everything I’ve refused to feel. Including the fear for Darwin’s life that I’ve just tried to push under the rug and pretend I’m fine.
He doesn’t say anything. He holds me, fucks me slowly with hard, deep rolls of his hips until my tears have dried. Then he turns me over so I’m facing him. I feel torn up. Ripped apart. Raw. Exposed.
Liam brushes his fingers over my cheek, and for some reason, whatever else I was hanging onto falls away. I take a shaky breath and turn my face into his. Our lips brush. My heart skips around and then… we kiss.
Our kissing is sensual, just as deep and invasive as his dick had been. But it’s different now. When he moves inside me, it’s still slow. Still deep and intense. Now it’s sensual and soft and intimate.
I want to get away, but that’s just the panic in my head, the panic that I no longer have any defenses built up against because he just tore them down. Instead, I lose myself in him. I let him hold me to him in a warm, consuming embrace that I feel in all the cracks he created inside me.
His body rocks against mine, his cock hitting all the good parts in slow, measured rocks of his hips. We’re not in a hurry. Liam broke me down, and now he’s going to put me back together. I’m safe in his arms, which is terrifying.