57. Chapter Fifty-Seven #3
Ellen spotted me first, smirking. “Midnight snack?”
Ryan gave me a curious look, arching an eyebrow as he looked from my face to the guest room door. “Everything okay?”
I shrugged. “She’s having a hard time regulating, so we’re trying smaller options first.”
“Regulating emotions? And is you being shirtless one of these options?”
There was an unusual judgmental tone in his voice that set me on edge, and I glared at Ryan.
“You know some of the hell she’s been through, and even if you don’t, does it matter what the trigger was?
Do you read Lianne the riot act when she’s under her desk?
” Ryan opened his mouth, but I didn’t give him the chance.
“As for the reason I’m shirtless, not that it’s any of your business, it’s because I came out of the bathroom from taking a shower and found her in a less than stellar mental spot.
Sorry I forgot to grab my shirt from my suitcase before jumping into action.
Now, if you don’t mind, I have a friend to help out.
” Without another word, I opened the door and walked in, shutting it with my foot before either of them could follow me.
“Who were you talking to in the hall?” Adair’s voice was strained, and I rushed to her side and handed her the water.
“Ryan and Ellen just got home from their date. It looked like they had a good time.” Please don’t ask what we talked about. “Would you like me to hold the ice pack on the back of your neck?”
She held the bottle to her chest. “Yes, please.”
A couple minutes later, Adair’s shoulders dropped as she let out a long breath.
“That sounded calmer. You ready for something to drink?”
She chuckled and sat up, nodding. “Yes, please.” After taking a sip, she looked up at me again. “Why did you look pissed when you walked in earlier?”
Well, shit. “You clocked that?”
“Somehow, yeah. What happened out there?”
“He had an issue with what I was wearing…” I let out a sigh. “Well, it was more about what I wasn’t wearing while helping you and why you were upset. I handled it, and if Ellen is the magical Ryan whisperer that everyone says she is, she will explain to him the error of his ways.”
Adair’s brow furrowed as she glanced at the door. “That doesn’t seem like the Ryan I knew.”
“It’s not. That was not a typical response from him, for sure. It’s part of the reason I was pissed.” It was then I took the opportunity to grab my t-shirt and pull it on. The last thing I needed or wanted was a repeat performance if I had to run out of the room again.
Adair took another sip and then hummed. “I can always ask Avery to talk to him if you want. She seemed to like putting him in his place earlier.”
My eyes went wide. “You’re diabolical, and I love it. Remind me to stay on your good side.”
She chuckled weakly. “I didn’t survive nearly seven years on the run by being sweet all the time.
I’m not proud of everything I’ve done in the name of self-preservation, and I’m not afraid to call in backup when needed.
So, yeah, I’m not the person you want to piss off.
” She shook her head. “That escalated a bit more than I expected. Sorry about that.”
I took her hand in mine. “Never be sorry for being you. None of us have walked through the hell you have. No one has room to say a word about how you handle it.”
Adair let out a sigh. “I know we sort of talked about it earlier, but I don’t want to make you uncomfortable with how attached I’ve become.”
“And like I told you earlier, I’m fine with it. No one gets to tell you how to handle your demons.”
After a while, we settled into bed, and like earlier, Adair wrapped her arm around me and snuggled in.
“Can I ask you a question?”
“Mhmm.”
I smirked at the sleepy hum. “Why do you almost always rest your head on my chest?” All her muscles in her back tensed up, and when she went to move, I stopped her. “I don’t mind, I promise. I’m honestly just curious.”
After letting out a deep sigh, she held me a little tighter.
“I need to hear your heartbeat. It reminds me you’re alive.
” There was a pause. “That’s what one of my nightmares was the first night at Lukas’s house.
It started out Derek being the one dying…
and then it morphed into you.” She sniffled.
“I can’t keep losing people around me that I care about.
I… I don’t know how much more I can take before my heart shatters into a million tiny pieces. ”
Now I tightened my hold on her. “I promise I’m going to do everything to keep both of us alive.”
Sometime later, a whimper pulled me from my sleep. By the time I registered it was from Adair, she was gripping my shirt tight.
“Hey. Shhh. It’s okay. You’re safe.” Then I remembered what she told me about her nightmare. “I’m here. I’m safe. I’m very much alive and not going anywhere.” Without thinking, I kissed the top of her head. “I’ve got you.”
She snuggled her head against my chest and after a few moments, let out a much calmer breath.
“See? Alive and well. Go to sleep, Hummingbird.”