Chapter 48
CHAPTER 48
Rainey
“Why am I so emotionally stunted, Devyn?”
She gives me a sad smile and hands me a quart of Cherry Garcia. How cliché am I? I’m eating ice cream directly from the carton after a breakup, spilling my guts to my best friend. I don’t really care how pathetic I look though, because those Ben and Jerry dudes make some good shit.
“Honey, you’re not emotionally stunted. You’re just…scared.”
“Ugh, that’s exactly what he said.” I take a huge bite.
“Well…”
“Please don’t tell me you’re on his side,” I groan.
“I’m not on anyone’s side,” she assures me. “I told you in the very beginning I didn’t want to see either one of you get hurt, and now you’re both hurt. I’m just trying to be the voice of reason, because you have the power to change this. ”
I side-eye her. “And I’m being unreasonable?”
She purses her lips. “Lorraine, why don’t you call him?”
“Nice dodge,” I grumble.
Devyn sighs. “I don’t know why you’re torturing yourself like this.”
“Because it’s better to hurt a little now than hurt a helluva lot more later. After everything went down with Adam, I promised myself to never let another man hurt me again.”
“Why are you so convinced he’ll screw things up? After everything you’ve told me, and everything I’ve seen , that man adores you, Lorraine. It’s been pretty obvious to Drew and me for a long time .”
“Sure… now he does. But what happens when my heart has gone past the point of no return, and he decides one woman isn’t good enough?”
“This isn’t some passing fancy for him,” she says. “Did you miss the part where he said he’s been in love with you for years ?”
“He’s confusing love with lust .” I give a dismissive wave. “And let’s not forget, he was sleeping with other women the entire time.”
“Because you never gave him any indication you were interested. You turned down his advances repeatedly . Aaaaaand , you were engaged to Adam for a big chunk of that time. What was he supposed to do? Become a monk?”
“The idiot would probably still be hot wearing one of those ugly brown robes.”
She chuckles. “It’s not too late, honey. Just call him.”
I shake my head. “ I can’t , Devyn.”
“Why not?”
Damn it, I can’t hold back my tears anymore. “Because in my short time with him, I’ve been happier than I ever thought possible. I’ve never felt this strongly about anyone, not even Adam, and I was going to marry him. There’s so much more to Brody than he lets people see. And I adore every part , Devyn, even when he’s being a complete jackass. If he decided he didn’t want me one day, I would be devastated —pummeled beyond recognition. I can’t risk it.”
“I really hope you don’t regret this, Lorraine.” She pulls me into a side hug.
“Me, too, Dev.”