Chapter 27
CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
It only took us about thirty minutes to reach the camping spot I’d picked out.
Since the sun had set and the sky was starting to darken, I quickly got to work.
First, I gathered wood, then started a fire.
Once that was done, I pitched the tent. I’d brought two sleeping bags, so I tossed them inside.
I also had two chairs, which I set up by the fire.
The entire time I was doing this, I kept trying to think of where to begin.
I didn’t know how to explain everything to Laney in a way that wouldn’t freak her the fuck out.
The past three days I’d come up with a dozen different speeches, practiced in front of a mirror, but now none of them seemed right.
I pulled out graham crackers, chocolate, and marshmallows, setting them next to the fire. Then I handed Laney a thermos with hot tea.
“What’s all this?” she asked.
“S’mores. You can’t go camping without making s’mores.” I withdrew the two long metal sticks I had, putting marshmallows on the end of each. I handed one to Laney, then stuck mine in the fire, toasting my marshmallow.
She hesitated, then did the same, watching me. “This past week…”
I swallowed, not knowing what to say. I wasn’t ready for this conversation.
“It was the worst week of my life,” Laney said, twisting her stick in the fire. “I was going to break up with you.”
My heart fluttered with pain, and I closed my eyes.
“But as soon as I saw you again, it’s like the past week didn’t happen.”
I peered over at her. She was focused on her stick, keeping her marshmallow just above the flames as she turned it.
“From the first time I saw you,” she continued, “I felt a connection to you. A pull. I think that has to do with what you are and what I am part of.”
I cleared my throat. “I agree.” I didn’t feel like telling her it was the start of a mating bond.
“But it’s more than that,” Laney said. “I really like you. I think you’re crazy smart, wicked funny, a nice guy. I enjoy spending time with you.” She looked over at me, biting her bottom lip.
I picked up a graham cracker and put a piece of chocolate on it.
Then I put my toasted marshmallow on top of the chocolate, wanting it to melt a bit before topping it with another graham cracker.
Laney started to do the same. I held my s’more, trying to figure out what to say to the beautiful girl beside me who I wanted more than anything in the world.
“I spoke to my mom today,” she said as she made her own s’more. “She told me about my biological father. But she didn’t explain what I am.” The fire reflected in her eyes. “I want to know what I am.”
I took a bite of my s’more, trying to buy myself some time.
“My mom said something about shifting and changing.”
I loosed a breath. “You’re what we call a half-breed.”
“Half you and half human?”
“Yes. That’s not to say I’m not human. I’m equally both.
But you’re more human than shifter. Meaning, both my parents are shifters, whereas only one of yours is.
” When I told her I was a werewolf, she wouldn’t believe me.
I’d have to show her. Once I showed her, she’d freak out and run away.
She probably wouldn’t want anything to do with me after that.
I wouldn’t have to break up with her since she’d be running so fast from me.
She took a bite of her s’more.
“To explain it better,” I said, focusing on my food rather than Laney, “my kind doesn’t want people like you to exist because you carry the gene. Since you’re not a full-blooded shifter, it creates all sorts of problems and leaves you weak.”
“My mom said she gives me the medicine to suppress this gene.”
I wondered if her mom had told her it was wolfsbane. “Did your mom not tell you what you shift into?”
“No, she did not.”
I found that hard to believe. “I want to tell you what I am,” I said. “What I shift into. But I’m afraid of your reaction.” I finished my s’more and wiped my hands on my jeans.
“At this point, I just need to know. Especially since this involves me, too.”
“What I’m about to tell you, no one can know. We keep our existence hidden.”
“My mom said if anyone found out, they’d take me away, and I wouldn’t have a life any more.”
“She’s right.”
“Will knowing this put me in danger?” Laney asked.
“You’re already in danger. My kind doesn’t want half-breeds to exist since they threatened our secrecy. As you know, the enforcers found you. They’ve been watching you, trying to decide how to proceed.” The thought of any harm coming to her made me ill.
“What do you shift into?” she asked, her voice sounding loud in the quiet night.
I looked at her and let my eyes shift.
She sucked in a breath. “What are you?”
There was no way around it. “I shift into a wolf.” It was better than saying werewolf. I wasn’t like some movies portrayed. I wasn’t half man and half wolf at the same time. I was either a man or a wolf.
“I’m part wolf?”
“Yes.” I didn’t say anything else. I let her think about that, absorbing it.
“But I don’t shift because the medicine suppresses that wolf gene?”
“Correct. It contains wolfsbane. I’m not sure if the toxic plant is simply suppressing your gene or if it’s slowly killing it.”
“Let’s say it’s suppressing it,” she said, her voice now a whisper. “If I stopped taking the wolfsbane, would I shift?”
“I don’t know. My guess is that you would. Otherwise, why would your mom still be giving it to you?”
She rubbed her face, her hands shaking. “I’m part shifter, a wolf, and part human. So that means my dad is like you. He’s a shifter.”
“Yes.”
“How am I different from you? Am I a weaker version of you? Or are there other differences between a full shifter and a half-breed?”
These were all good questions. “With you taking the wolfsbane, I can’t be completely sure. There haven’t been many half-breeds. The ones I’ve heard about never made it to adulthood.”
“Why?”
I ran a hand over my face. “Our enforcers never let them live that long. It’s too dangerous for our kind.”
“Because?”
“If you have kids, you can pass on the gene. We can’t have that happening. Most of us live together in packs. Those of us who don’t, still fall under the protection of a pack and follow its rules.”
She finished her s’more, then took a sip of her tea. “I want to see.”
“You want to see me shift?” I asked, needing to be sure.
“Yes.”
I stood. “I need to, uh, remove my clothes first.” I hadn’t brought anything else to wear, so I couldn’t ruin these ones.
“Go for it. It’s not like I haven’t seen you naked before.” She leaned back in the chair, folding her hands behind her head, ready to watch me strip.
I smirked. “Enjoy the show.”
“Oh, I will.” She smiled wickedly at me.
After removing my flannel and t-shirt, I took off my shoes, jeans, and socks.
Standing naked before Laney, vulnerability flooded me.
Normally, I shifted with my packmates. I’d never shifted in front of someone not from my pack.
Doing this in front of her felt different somehow. Like I was revealing part of my soul.
I took several steps away from her and the fire, wanting to give myself plenty of room to shift.
Laney leaned forward, her eyes intently watching me.
I took three deep breaths, then reached within to that part of me always humming beneath the surface.
I melted into it and shifted. Instantly, my eyesight sharpened, my sense of smell intensified, and my entire body transformed.
I stood on four paws, facing Laney.
Her eyes widened. She scrambled to her feet and jumped behind the chair. As if that would protect her from me. “Can you understand me?” she asked, her voice wary.
I nodded.
“Shift back.”
Returning to human form was always harder. I had to rein in the beast, shove it down, and let the human part of me claw its way out.
The wind shifted, and Laney’s smell washed over me. The primal part of me took over, wanting to be closer to something so enticing. Without realizing it, I moved beside her, nuzzling against her.
“Rowan?” she said, her voice trembling. “You’re scaring me.” I’d inadvertently pushed her against the tent.
I forced myself to step back, fighting for control. I couldn’t risk hurting or scaring her.
Turning my back to her, I broke eye contact. The second I felt my draw to her fade, I shoved my human self in, shifting back.
Without looking at Laney, I gathered my clothes, putting them back on. My hands and arms were shaking. “I’m sorry,” I said. “I didn’t mean to frighten you.”
“Thank you for showing me,” she said, pacing before the tent. “You’re beautiful as a wolf.”
At that, I peered over at her.
“Your fur is the same color as your hair.”
I’d never had anyone call me beautiful before.
“Your friends…Danny, Jacob, Adan, Emily…they all shift like that? Into wolves?”
“Yes.”
“Then you’re not shifters,” she said, her voice slow and methodical. “You’re werewolves.”
“Yes.” I stood before her with my hands on my hips.
“You guys are a pack?”
“Yes.”
“Could I be a part of your pack so the enforcers won’t kill me?”
My heart pounded loudly. That was exactly what I wanted to happen.
“The issue is that half-breeds usually can’t control when they shift.
If they do manage to shift, they lack discipline in their wolf form.
Sometimes they get stuck and can’t shift back to human form.
That, along with carrying the gene, is why we don’t allow half-breeds to live.
And we can’t allow you to breed and pass on the gene.
It might skip a generation or two, then show up.
It would be a disaster. Kind of like what happened to your mom.
She probably thought she was pregnant with a regular human baby, then she found out that wasn’t the case. ”