16. Chapter 16 – Rae
F amily dinner with the Fenwicks was nothing new to me.
When I was growing up, Zach’s parents were always generous enough to include me.
It wasn’t a strict tradition or something on a regular schedule, just a habit formed when all four Fenwick kids still lived at home.
Now that Cole lived in eastern Washington, the rest of the siblings lived on their own, and Vanessa and Gary traveled more in semi-retirement, they were fewer and farther between.
Vi’s text was my only warning.
Vanessa Fenwick loved her kids, but that didn’t stop her from creating destruction in her path.
She was one hundred percent related to Gran.
Her mother was in-your-face with her loud wardrobe and rude comments.
Apparently, in your eighties, you just didn’t give a fuck anymore.
I respected that. Vanessa was more subtle.
A breeze to Gran’s cloudy storm front. But no less intense .
Gran lived to get caught. Took pride in weaseling out of consequences.
Vanessa had a different style. Hurricane Vanessa was at once a force of nature and as difficult to pin down as the wind.
She had no trouble with direct confrontation, but somehow seemed to escape any real backlash.
My favorite memory was her politely eviscerating the school board for trying to end human development curriculum.
I’d never seen adults behave that way, sidling up with a smile and slicing with the shiv of a well-constructed argument.
I was at the meeting to accept a local scholarship and got a better education than I’d expected in that one meeting.
My friend Anya claimed she wanted to be Gran when she grew up.
But I’d rather be Vanessa. Loyal and protective, but not afraid of holding my own.
I was working on it. The upcoming sale of our repair shop property was the chance I’d been waiting for.
Ten long years, but my sacrifices would finally pay off.
“Ready?” Zach called from downstairs. A delicate shiver ran down my spine, leaving me tingling. The sensation spread from my shoulders to my fingertips and darted straight through my center to my toes.
His deep voice had called for me a thousand times over the years. Sometimes in command when we were on a SAR mission. Sometimes just a friendly hello as he boarded Sailor Swift . Tonight felt different. The new awareness blooming between us made dinner with his family feel important.
I gave myself one last nod in the mirror, tugging my tank top to cover the waist of my jeans.
I’d scrubbed off the last of the dirt and grime from my day at San Juan Marine Repair and pulled my curly mop back into a messy bun.
Summer felt like it had finally arrived on the island, and the day had warmed up to a balmy seventy-five degrees.
Not hot by mainland standards, but the island climate was a little milder than the rest of western Washington .
I padded downstairs, Zach and the kids waiting at the front door.
“You look …”
“Cute,” Hana finished.
“I was going to say beautiful,” Zach said.
I held in my snort. Debating him wasn’t a great example for Hana. I should be able to handle a compliment. And something about the way Zach’s gaze lingered on my mouth made me pause. Like they weren’t throwaway words.
He drifted closer, whispering, “Yes, I absolutely mean it. No, I’m not just flirting. Get used to it, Captain.”
He smelled of fresh soap, the scent lingering as we drew closer. He’d pulled a Mariner’s hat over his hair, shadowing his eyes. But sincerity shone there.
Something between yearning and awkwardness hovered between us.
Admitting, even to myself, that I wanted his attention made me uncomfortable.
Each time he forced me to see something different, it chipped away at the shell I kept around my heart.
And I jealously guarded every piece of that protection.
Because without it? I’d be absolutely vulnerable to him.
But something about his soft voice, softer eyes, made me think that wouldn’t be a bad thing…
“Let’s go!” Hana called, hopping from one foot to another by the door.
We loaded up in the car, and I drove us out to the Fenwick farm.
Jia’s house was a smaller replica of the Fenwick house.
Both were craftsman-style two-story floor plans with windows tucked into the eaves, but Zach’s childhood home had more bedrooms and bathrooms, befitting a family home that had housed four kids and three adults .
Vanessa met us at the door. Comfortably rounded and in her sixties, she had enough wrinkles to indicate wisdom and a broad smile and dimples to show her flair for mischief.
“Welcome, welcome. Come inside. Hana and Tae, I’m Vanessa Fenwick, Zach’s mother. It’s nice to meet you both.”
Tae shook her hand like a tiny adult. Hana waved.
“We’re going to eat in about an hour, but I put a few snacks in the kitchen if you’re hungry.” She turned to me, eyes twinkling. As she clasped my cheeks in her palms, her grin broadened. “And you . You’ve been holding out on me, young lady.”
I flicked a glance at Zach. Probably too telling. But I wasn’t sure what she knew. Zach’s guilty expression didn’t help matters.
“We talked about this, Mom. Don’t scare her away.”
I swung toward Zach. Staring. They did what now?
I’d thought this was a casual invite. Not an audition. It was one thing if Zach and I knew we were exploring a relationship between us. It was another if his entire family had us under the microscope. His mention of family nicknames came back to haunt me.
Vanessa patted my left cheek. “I’ve always thought you two would be cute together.”
She released me, leading the way toward the back of the house. I stood, stunned.
“What just happened?” I asked Zach, keeping my voice low.
Maybe he picked up on the hint of danger in my tone. He reached for my hands, watching me. “I’m sorry, Rae. You know what Drew’s like.”
“Gruff. Kind of an asshole?”
He grimaced. “Plus, he loves to tease. I love him like a brother, but he can’t keep a secret worth a damn.”
“He is your brother. ”
“Exactly, and he felt it was his brotherly duty to let the entire family know that we kissed. We are very popular in the group chat.”
“They know? They all know?” I froze. “And they’ve been commenting on it?”
“Relax. Everyone loves you. It’s me they’re giving grief to.”
I laughed, but it came out brittle. Everyone loves you . The words shouldn’t make me want to run. But that kind of warmth felt strange. My family didn’t gush. They expected. Kept score. Calculated the potential benefits.
There was a reason I’d kept my breakup with Simon from them for as long as possible. If they knew about me and Zach, they’d start pressuring me to use his contacts. Use him.
“You probably should have warned me,” I said, keeping my tone even. The sting of not knowing lingered. Vi was also on my shit list. As one of my oldest friends, I would have expected her to clue me in. The Hurricane Vanessa warning wasn’t good enough, if they were discussing me behind my back.
“I meant to,” he admitted. He scrubbed his palm across the back of his neck.
“Then why didn’t you?”
“Because I wasn’t sure you’d come.” The raw vulnerability in his voice made me pause.
“You think I’d reject you and avoid your family because they found out about our kiss?”
“My family can be a lot. I know that. I should have prepared you better.”
“Yeah, you should have.” Grudgingly, I relented. He should have told me that their interest went beyond silly nicknames. But he was right that knowing in advance would have made me more anxious about tonight. About pleasing them. I was trying to shed those patterns. Leave them in the past.
“Hey. You done fighting now?” Drew’s question broke into the tiny world Zach and I had created around ourselves, reminding me that we were still in a houseful of Fenwicks.
I pivoted on my heel, frowning at Drew, who leaned casually against the entryway hall wall, arms crossed across his chest. “I have a bone to pick with you, Big Mouth.”
He held up his hands. “Rae-by-cakes, you’re such a secret squirrel that having the hot gossip was too tempting. I meant no harm.”
“I’m not ready to forgive you yet.”
He backed away, palms raised, confidently smirking down at me. “That’s okay, Rae-by-cakes. I think I’ve got time.”
If Zach’s entire family knew about our kiss, how long before my dad found out?
I winced. He’d just raked me over the coals for breaking up with Simon.
I didn’t want to know what he’d say about me hooking up with Zach.
My dad gave me a hard time about running around with Violet Fenwick and the kids he considered “too loaded to be real islanders.” In his eyes, only the families who fished and worked the waters were authentic islanders.
Zach clasped my hand, entwining our fingers. His eyes pleaded as he tugged me toward the kitchen. “It’ll be fine, Rae. My family already loves you.”
I followed him into the kitchen, my hand clasped securely in his. Vanessa had her back to us, working at the counter. Hana and Tae were ensconced at the kitchen table with Gran in front of a giant platter of cut vegetables and dip.
“You finally opened your eyes,” Gran crowed. Her expression radiated satisfaction. She’d dressed for dinner in jeans and a sleeveless top. Her shirt was bedazzled with tropical birds in a dizzying pattern of bright colors and rhinestones.
Her words were cryptic, but the way her gaze dropped to our joined hands, I assumed she was talking about Zach and me.
“Gran, sometimes you’re just waiting for the sun to come out. That right opportunity.”
“Hmmph. In my day, we made our opportunities.”
“Yeah, yeah. In your day you also thought the Earth was flat.”
“Get out before I do something that will embarrass your new girlfriend.” She softened it with a smile for me, but Zach still tugged me toward the back door.
“Everyone else outside?”
“Yes,” his mom answered. “Your dad’s at the grill. We’re just waiting on Vi.”
We escaped to the backyard.
“What was that about opening your eyes?” I asked Zach.
Maybe I didn’t want to know. After all, it was Gran.
He wrinkled his nose. “This year, she’s had a family motto for each of us.
One she wants us to live up to. She told me mine was to ‘wake up and open your eyes.’ But she says mysterious crap like that all the time.
Last week it was that I couldn’t slap a flower in an asshole and call it a vase after I asked her how her feud with Ollie Reyes was going.
” He shrugged. “She’s a little hard to read sometimes. ”
I blinked.
“Hello, Rae. So glad you could make it.” Gary Fenwick looked up from the grill, a welcoming smile in place. Graying at the temples, he looked like an older version of Cole and Drew. The older man exuded a calm that I found soothing after facing the Fenwick women.
“Hey, Mr. Fenwick.”
“Gary, dear. ”
We greeted Drew and Anya, who’d claimed spots at the large patio table. Anya’s smile held a hint of mischief. Between her and Vi, my secret was out.
Hana and Tae carried out dishes. Vanessa, Gran, and Vi trailed behind with their own armfuls of platters, cutlery, and cups, and I sprang up to help.
“Get your buns ready,” Vanessa said.
The kids giggled, and Gran exchanged a playful glance with them. “I like mine saucy,” she said.
“I like mine toasty,” Drew said, winking at Tae.
“I’ve got your toasty buns over here,” Gary offered.
The kids chortled, following Gran inside to prepare their plates. It eased the tightness in my chest to see them so relaxed. They’d had too much loss already in their young lives. Giving them this slice of normalcy, the support of family, felt like a gift.
If I’d brought them to my dad’s, he would have grilled too.
But it wouldn’t be as fun. As silly. My family was more matter-of-fact.
Eat and get on with it. Probably turn on a baseball game.
Zach’s family went out of their way to make Hana and Tae feel welcome.
To make them part of the fun. And I couldn’t thank them enough for that.