Chapter 14 #2
I ignored Nash, looking back and forth between Blake’s fuck you look and Ren’s horrified one. I knew it was true, yet I still felt compelled to ask.
“He kissed ya?”
Ren bit her lip. This was easily the second least likely thing I pictured Blake doing. Yes, he fucked around a lot, but to actively go after Ren…no way…at least not the Blake I thought I knew.
“Yes, he did, but I’m half to blame,” Ren said.
“Don’t listen to her. She’s lying to cover for me because she wants to make things all better,” Blake mocked, and Ren’s mouth fell open.
“Truth is, I kissed her. She didn’t want anything to do with it, but I did it anyway.
Then, I kissed her again even though I knew it was going to hurt you.
I wanted to see if her mouth was as sweet as you keep saying, and I can confirm you were telling the truth.
” It was like the tides had turned and were rushing back out to sea as Nash and Liam grabbed me when I lurched for Blake.
“Please don’t fight,” Ren said, touching my arm.
“Did ya not hear what he said?” I pointed at Blake. I didn’t know what to be mad at anymore. The fact he took her off property? The fact that she went willingly? Or that he kissed her, and she was defending him.
“First, a guard is watching us. Second, what I heard was someone trying to get punched. I’m telling you, it wasn’t all his fault. I need to speak to you, Myles…alone,” Ren said, but I was too focused on Blake. Was he trying to steal her? Did he like her, or was this just to get back at me?
“Is this about the fight the other night,” I asked, but Blake ignored me.
“I don’t know why you keep lying, Ren. You told me to stop kissing you,” Blake said, and I snarled at him. Lunging at him, I almost got my hit in but was dragged away before my fist could connect with his face.
“This is insane, you’re all insane.” Ren fumed and tossed her hands up. “You want to be a martyr, Blake, then go for it, but I’m not standing here to witness this stupidity.” Ren stomped away.
“Where are ya goin,” I called after her. She shot me a glare over her shoulder.
“Away from all the testosterone. I don’t like being pissed on like I’m a hydrant, and I really don’t like being ignored.” I looked at Blake, who crossed his arms, and then at Ren’s receding back.
“Fuck it. Let go, I’m leavin’.” I jogged a couple steps and then pointed at Blake. “I’m not done with you.”
“Whatever,” he said and rolled his eyes.
What the fuck was that? Taking off, I ran after Ren and caught up to her just before she walked into the library. “Hey. Talk ta me. Ya owe me that,” I said, grabbing her arm before she could open the door.
Spinning around, she yanked her arm out of my grip. “Were you really going to hurt Blake?”
“I’m confused. Blake kissed ya, and instead of being angry with him or happy that I was going to defend ya, yer angry with me.
” I lifted my arms. “I don’t get it. Am I not allowed to be angry that another guy kissed me girl?
” Ren sighed and sucked in a deep breath. “Did ya want to kiss him? Is that it?”
“I didn’t, or I didn’t think I did until it happened, and then I went along with it. I didn’t push Blake away like he is trying to make it seem.” She pulled on the cuffs of her hoodie, something she did when she was upset. That was not a good sign.
“So what does that mean? Do ya want him instead? Are ya wanting to break up?” My chest hurt just from saying the words. How far I’d fallen that the one girl I was crazy about could be kicking me to the curb for my best friend. It was karma biting me in the ass.
There was sadness etched into her stunning features, and I braced myself for what she said next. “No, I don’t want to break up, but I’d be lying if I said that the kiss didn’t affect me.” I took a step back. “I’m sorry that I let it happen, but….”
“But, ya liked it,” I finished for her, and she bit her lip and looked away. “If Blake hadn’t blurted it out, were ya goin’ to tell me, or was this going to turn into a sneaking around behind my back thing?”
Her eyes instantly flamed with anger, and I’d never been so happy to see that fire in her eyes.
“You know me better than that. I’d never do that to anyone, least of all you.
Yes, I was going to tell you. I just wasn’t planning on it being announced in front of everyone in the middle of the parking lot.
It’s not like I’m dating all of you, so I was going to tell you as soon as I got you alone.
” Ren shrugged. “Don’t you think it was strange for Blake to do that?
I mean, it was obvious to me that Blake wanted you to hit him when Nash backed off.
I think Theo is right. He’s looking for punishment. ”
I didn’t know what to do. “If Blake wants me to punch him, then good, I’m gonna fuckin’ smother him in his sleep,” I growled as I watched him walk along the other side of the driveway and into the school.
“Myles, I know this is messed up, and I’m not saying you don’t have a right to be angry with him, but don’t place all the blame on him. He’s already having a hard time. You beating the shit out of him isn’t going to help,” Ren said, and I narrowed my eyes at her. What the hell was happening here?
“Answer me this. Why were ya with him to begin with?” I pointed to where Blake had just disappeared. “And how the hell did ya get off the property? Am I trippin’ that this is out of the blue? I didn’t even know you liked Blake enough to run off in a car with him.”
“Shh,” she said and looked around. She pulled out a red wig from the pocket of the hoodie.
Disguise, huh? I should’ve thought of that.
“First, Blake and I went shopping together, remember? But when Blake arrived at class, he just stood outside the door and wouldn’t come in.
He looked lost. When the bell rang, he left, and I just had a bad feeling.
It was like I could sense how lost he felt, and I wanted to talk to him and see if I could get him to open up about why he was using.
I didn’t chase him down to have a make-out session or anything, if that’s what you’re thinking, but don’t start trying to tell me who I can be friends with either. ”
Running my hand through my hair, I stomped away to the edge of the walkway and let the snow hit me in the face. Each one was another little punch to the gut, and yet I got it. I wanted to know why he started, too.
“Did he open up?”
“He did, but it’s not really for me to talk about, as much as I want to tell you.
What I can say is that he needs his best friend and not this angry version of you.
He needs you to listen…to really hear him.
Blake has been suppressing a lot and you can only do that so long.
What you’re seeing is the result of him ignoring who he really is and getting proper help. ”
I turned around and looked at her, my eyes searching her face.
I didn’t know what I was looking for, but all I saw was the same honest warmth as always.
There was worry in her eyes, but I knew that if I asked the question that was tormenting me, she would answer. The question was, did I want to know?
“Tell me, Snowflake, do ya like him and want him?” I held my breath as I waited for her to answer.
Ren walked to me, wrapped her arms around my waist, and laid her head over my heart. I sucked in a shuddering breath and held her back. I was in so deep with her. I’d stared down the barrel of a gun, and it didn’t scare me nearly as much as the thought of my Snowflake leaving me.
“There is something between us, but I don’t really know how to put it into words.
” She buried herself deeper into my jacket.
“But, what I do know is that I’m crazy about you, and my feelings for you haven’t changed.
I don’t want to lose you, Myles. I don’t want to break up, and I would be devastated if that is what you decided you wanted to do because of this.
” She held me tighter, and I kissed the top of her head.
As soon as she looked up at me, I dropped my lips to hers.
She moaned and wrapped her arms around my neck.
The fear that she was going to say we were through was real, and I didn’t know what to do with it.
She said she was crazy about me, but the girl was making me lose my mind.
I was never letting her go. Deepening the kiss, I tasted her mouth and loved that she whimpered and shivered in my arms. She was my snowflake.
She was a cool breeze on a hot day, a stiff drink, a soft touch.
She made my heart beat harder. Breaking the kiss, I sucked her lip into my mouth and couldn’t get enough of the desire burning in her eyes.
“Tell me honestly. I’m the better kisser, right?”
Ren blinked and then rolled her eyes as she smirked. “I’m not going to tell you,” she said cheekily and gave me a quick kiss before pulling away.
“Aww, come on, ya gotta give me that.” I held out my arms as she pulled open the library door.
Ren stopped and looked back at me, smiling. The wind blew her hair away from her face, and my heart thundered. She was so fucking beautiful. The smile slowly fell as she stared into my eyes.
“I’m really sorry I hurt you, Myles. I’d never intentionally do that,” she said softly.
“I know,” I said. I believed her. Part of the reason I was falling so hard for her was that she was not like anyone else I’d ever met. She didn’t have a cruel or manipulative bone in her body.
Nodding, she disappeared inside her favorite building. Turning around, I rolled out my shoulders. Alright, Blake, this shit had dragged on long enough. Time to fucking talk.