Chapter 38 #2
As we slipped into the car, I couldn’t help but remember the first day my dad pulled in and dropped me off.
My life changed forever that day. There were some memories since arriving I never wanted to give up, but the rest…
the rest I could happily forget. Would he even care what happened to me?
Leaning my head against the window, I watched the shop as we passed by and then closed my eyes before I lost my nerve to do this.
My mum would tell me that the Lord only dealt out what we could handle, but right now, I felt like he was overestimating what I could take.
FEbrUARY 25 – FRIDAY 6:59 PM
Blake
Fuck, fuck, fuck. I couldn’t stop my leg from bouncing, and the urge to take something was stronger than it had been since the night of the OD. I pinched the bridge of my nose and focused on my breathing, trying to get out of my head.
Stress was my major trigger, and this entire situation was more stressful than the rest of the shit I’d been worrying about put together.
Fucking Axel. I should’ve seen something like this coming.
Ren was too bright of a light in this world.
It was the reason that everyone was fascinated with her.
We were nothing more than moths to a flame.
The time read seven when I pulled out my phone. Ren and my mom had been in the exam room for over an hour with the doctor, and each minute that ticked on managed to push my anxiety a little higher.
It didn’t help that there’d been no word from Myles or anyone.
This felt bigger than anything else we’d dealt with.
I wanted to include my dad, but if he disapproved and tried to stop them, then things were going to get ugly fast. I knew the glimmer in Myles’s eye.
There was no way Axel was living past tonight.
He would find a way no matter the obstacles or the cost. That was what attracted Nash to him in the first place.
You wouldn’t find a more easy-going guy, but if you pushed him to the edge, he was twice as dangerous as any of us, except maybe Nash.
Standing, I paced the empty hallway where I was told to wait. The odd nurse would march past, or a gurney would be wheeled by with a patient lying on it, but other than that, I was left to my thoughts. Not good.
The walls were far too white. Why did they always paint the walls a bright white with even brighter lights?
It was like they were prepping us to know what heaven would look like before we died.
Morbid, maybe, but I’d never been a fan of hospitals.
As if my body was trying to remind me of what could happen if I slipped, a sharp pain lanced my chest, and I leaned against the wall and rubbed my ribcage.
I’d promised everyone, including myself, that I wouldn’t touch anything, and I would stick to it. But fuck, the battle was real. The memory of Ren peering out from under the worktable flashed behind my eyes. Standing up straight, I clenched my jaw tight.
My body jerked as a hand touched my shoulder, and I turned to see my mom.
Are you okay?
“Yeah, I’m fine.” She cocked a hip, a hand going to her waist. I swear my mom had the best glare, and I swallowed hard. “I’ll be fine. I’m struggling with what’s going on with Ren, but life is full of stress, right? I’m working through it.”
Are you sure? I can take you home.
“No, that’ll be worse. Trust me, I’m good.”
Alright, I believe you. Ren is asking for you.
“So, the doctor is all done?”
Yes.
“How bad is it?”
I can’t tell you. That’s up to Ren.
“I know, but….”
No buts. That is her private medical information. You ask her, and if Ren wants you to know, she will tell you. You have to respect that, Blake. Don’t push her. As hard as it is, she may not be ready to share those details with anyone. You really care about her, don’t you?
I ran my hand through my hair and then nodded. “Yeah, I do.”
I quickly walked away before my mom turned my feelings for Ren into her next quest, I tapped softly on the exam room door.
“Come in,” Ren called out, her voice as sweet as any songbird.
Ren still had the hospital gown on, and if it had been for any other reason, I would’ve said she looked adorable in the knee-length blue flowered covering. Fuck, that bruise on her face was nasty. She and Myles almost had a matching set.
“My mom said that you wanted me?”
“Yeah, I just…I just wanted you close. Is that okay? If you’re not comfortable or don’t want me now, I’ll understand.”
Stepping in close, I tipped her chin up with my finger.
“Don’t even bother going there. Of course, I want you, and yes, Myles does, too.
What happened doesn’t change anything between us unless you want it to.
” She gently shook her head, her silvery eyes looking like liquid as tears filled them.
“I can see all of the ifs in your eyes, but there are no ifs with this. Axel would’ve found a way to get to you, and he proved that, but that is not on you.
Not ever.” I grabbed the track pants I’d given her off the bed and held them up.
“Do you want me to help you get changed?”
“Please. It’s hard to bend over or move my shoulder over my head.”
“Lean against the bed and lift your leg for me.” I waited until she was in position before I asked the question I’d asked my mom. “How bad are the injuries.” I flicked my gaze up to hers as she lifted her leg. “And don’t sugarcoat it.”
The corner of her mouth twitched, telling me she’d been thinking of doing just that.
“Nothing is broken, but I had to have fluid drained from my knee and elbow, and as you can see, I’m badly bruised. The ultrasound didn’t show internal bleeding, but until the CT scan is back, I need to take it easy.”
“So, you don’t need to stay here?” Ren shook her head as I pulled the track pants up, trying to avoid the bruises, but it was almost impossible.
I picked up the T-shirt off the bed while she turned around for me to undo the ties on the gown.
It was hard not to show emotion as it opened, and the bruising and handprints were so dark on her skin that it looked like she’d been painted with them.
Slipping the material over her head, I fumbled with how to word my next question.
“And what about the other stuff?” She was quiet and didn’t face me even once the shirt was in place, and I thought that I’d upset her. “You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.”
“They did a colposcopy, took blood, and gave me some pills for pain. They want to do another blood test in six months to be safe.” She slowly turned around to face me but stared at her feet as she wrapped her arms around herself.
God, I hated to see her like this. Cupping her cheek, I wiped away the stray tears that were trickling loose.
I hoped the guys tortured Axel before killing him.
“On the bright side, he didn’t come in me, so I guess I can celebrate small miracles.
I didn’t want to have to deal with that reality. ”
I wrapped her up and held her. “What do you need me to do? I have no idea how to make any of this better for you?”
“I’m not sure there is anything anyone can do to make this better, but can we stop for coffee at the place Myles normally goes? I want a coffee and a muffin, it’s kind of turned into my comfort food.”
Hugging her a little tighter, I kissed the top of her head. “We can go anywhere you want.”
A buzzing sound grabbed my attention. I stupidly pulled out my phone before realizing that it was my mom’s.
She’d left it on the chair in the corner.
Walking over, I picked it up and stared at the screen.
It was a text message from an unknown number.
Typing in her password, I opened the text chain that started with my mom saying that Ren was attacked but alive.
Unknown: Any updates?
Ella: Bruised, but nothing was broken, and a rape kit was done.
I felt bad for reading my mom’s messages, but who the hell was she talking to about Ren?
Unknown: Do you know who did it?
Ella: Yes, but I’ll let you know if anything needs to be taken care of.
Unknown: Thank you.
I quickly locked the phone and set it down when I heard my mom talking to someone outside the door. Ren was staring blindly at the hoodie on the bed. Her eyes were glazed like she wasn’t seeing what was in front of her.
“Ren?” Reaching out, I laid my hand on her shoulder, and she jumped as her eyes met mine. “Let’s get you out of here.”
FEbrUARY 25 – FRIDAY 9:13 PM
My mom had made sure we were in the room, and Ren had showered and been tucked into Myles’s bed before she walked to the door. I followed.
Are the two of you dating? I licked my lips, not sure how to answer this. I had no idea what she was going to think about the situation with Myles.
I guess you could say that. I signed back.
So why did you put her in Myles’s bed?
We are both with her. My mom’s eyes went wide, and I was getting ready to try and explain, but her lips twitched up.
Good for her. Are you okay with this?
I am. It’s complicated, but I’d do anything to be with Ren. She calms the stormy seas in my soul and chases the shadows from my mind.
My mom smiled. Always the poet. Take care of her, Blake, and don’t take it personally if she wants space.
This is hard for anyone to process, and what she wants, or needs will change constantly.
She may not even know what she needs or will yell for what seems like no reason, or she may want to be alone. I guess I’m saying to be patient.
I nodded. Mom, you said you understood her. What did you mean?
She looked at the bed and then back to me. I’d just met your father when I was attacked one night at a college party.
I had to pick my mouth up off the floor. Why didn’t you say anything? Does Dad know?
Yes, your father knows. It was a difficult time, and it’s not something I like to talk about, especially with my sons.
That was fair. How did you forget and move on?
I’ve never forgotten, but I don’t let that night hold power over me anymore. She softly tapped me over my heart. I see how she looks at you. You two are good for each other. Just be careful. There is a lot going on, and some of it I don’t understand yet.
Do you know anything about her family or what her father is up to? I thought about the text message I saw at the hospital with the unknown person.
My mom’s eyes lingered on Ren’s sleeping form. I know enough to know that danger is brewing. Be safe and be extra vigilant. Without saying anything else, she turned and walked out, and I was left staring after her. What the hell was going on? Why couldn’t she say?
“Blake?”
I spun around. “You’re awake.”
“Yeah, I keep seeing it,” she said.
Grabbing my guitar, I sat down on the edge of the bed and softly strummed. My fingers moved up and down the strings as I randomly played a song that used to comfort me. “Name a song, and I’ll play it for you. It can be any song you want.”
“You know every song in the world?”
I loved to hear the touch of sass in her voice. She was fierce, and if roles were reversed, I didn’t know if I’d have the same resolve. Giving her a smirk, I admired how adorable she looked curled up on her side in my bright yellow hoodie.
“You caught me. I may not know every song, but if I don’t I’ll learn it for you,” I said and was awarded a little smile.
“My mum’s favorite song was Bette Midler’s Wind Beneath My Wings . I couldn’t hold a tune, but she always made me put it on and asked me to sing along with the song. She said I was her wind. Could you play that for me,” Ren asked as she slid closer so her legs touched me. My heart soared.
I cupped her cheek and nodded. “Yeah, my Little Kite, I can play it.”
For her, I would play anything. Her eyes closed halfway through the song, and when it ended, I started over again. I would play until my fingers bled and still wouldn’t stop if that’s what she needed.