Chapter 23
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
Aspen
Anger was a deadly emotion. It slithered through you like a white, hot demon and altered your thought process. It was why I had punched Myles. It was why I’d attacked Foster all those months ago. My teeth sunk into my bottom lip as I worked to contain the rage flowing through me. The guys sat around me, laughing about nonsense I wanted no part of. They forced me to strip as they’d done many times by now and just ignored my existence. Except for Myles who would look at me every now and then with that sinister smirk twisting his dark features. He expected me to cave and give him what he wanted.
The arrogant asshole.
In another life, I would have. He was sexy as hell. But he’d been my monster, and to fuck him would be ridiculous of me.
“Are you hungry?” Myles’ breath fanned against my neck, making a shudder rumble through me from the sensation. He stood behind me while I sat on the couch, finally safe from his clutches for now—or so I thought. He brushed my hair, pushing it over one of my shoulders, making it tumble over my right breast.
My stomach growled instinctively, but with the chatter surrounding us, I doubted anyone had heard it. “What do you think?” I shot back, irritation clawing at me. I hadn’t eaten since lunch.
A dark chuckle rumbled from him as he leaned forward, his lips brushing along the back of my neck. Electricity shot through me instantly, making my hands curl into fists within my lap. He’d never been this way with me before. Sure, he’d threatened to take me against my will and actually succeeded in that department, but he never cared to flirt with me like this. My head spun with confusion.
“Enough,” Foster growled. He was still seated in the armchair, his eyes narrowed on me like it was somehow my fault.
If I wasn’t so pissed off at Myles and he hadn’t done what he did, I might have fucked him right here out of spite. I bet Foster would love that.
Myles groaned, like pulling away from me physically pained him. A breath of relief fluttered past my lips due to the distance and I slouched back into the sofa. My skin stuck to the leather, making me shift uncomfortably. I hated this. All of the furniture here was made of leather aside from the beds.
The devil incarnate sauntered back into the kitchen with Hunter in tow, presumably to make something for dinner. Unease twisted my gut, making me feel even more out of place than usual. I was at a cabin, far away from civilization. Not like anyone would save me even if they could. No one has bothered to help before. Except for Raven. Who was now dead because of it.
My thoughts came to a screeching halt when my eyes locked with Foster’s from across the room. His jaw was tight as he stared, anger radiating off him in waves causing tension to thicken around the sitting area. He hated me, and that was perfectly fine, because I felt the exact same way about him.
“Is there something you want to say?” I drawled in annoyance.
He swallowed thickly, a muscle thrumming along the edge of his sharp jawline. “If I had something to say, I’d fucking say it. Don’t you think?”
My eyes rolled into the back of my skull. “I wouldn’t be here right now if you’d just let me go,” I reminded him. “You’re the one that wants me around for whatever weird reason.”
His gaze dropped to his folded hands within his lap. They were wrapped around one another tightly, his knuckles turning white from the pressure. I wish I knew what the hell he was thinking. His actions certainly didn’t match his words. He hated me but wanted me around constantly. What sense did that make?
“You know what I don’t get?” I continued, waiting until his eyes met mine again. “Why you hate me so damn much without having a valid reason. I wasn’t even a problem for you until Myles cornered me in the damn hallway and started making threats and demands. We probably never would have crossed paths otherwise.”
He scoffed, reaching into his pocket and pulling out a pack of cigarettes. “Because you’re a fucking pain in my ass.” He placed a cigarette in his mouth and lit it before tossing one at me, catching me by surprise. It hit my chest and rolled in between my thighs. Sighing, I reached for it, cradling it between my fingers. Next, he tossed the lighter, but I’d been expecting it this time. I grabbed it out of the air, the action making my breasts jiggle which virgin boy’s eyes seemed to notice too. For someone who hated me so much, he definitely couldn’t stop staring.
“Eyes up here, asshole.” His gaze snapped to mine and his eyes narrowed with anger. Abruptly, he stood and stalked out of the room.
Collin chuckled as he entered, his hair still damp from the shower he’d just taken. He slid into the spot next to me while I lit my cancer stick and sucked in a cloud of smoke, relishing the slight burn it inflicted on my throat. Glancing over at him, my breath caught in my throat from my double-take. He was wearing nothing but a pair of sweats that hung low on his hips. His smooth skin was as golden as ever, revealing all the hard planes of his physique.
“Eyes up here.” He smirked, using my earlier words against me.
A smile teased the corners of my mouth as our eyes locked. He was fucking perfection. His hair swept across his forehead, framing the top of his face perfectly. His eyes were as golden as his skin, pulling you in and making it easy to get lost in them. I was playing a dangerous game.
After dinner, the guys adorned the coffee table with liquor, pills, and baggies of white powder and rocks. My heart thudded rapidly as I took it all in, unease settling inside me. I stood to the side since all the seats had been taken and folded my arms over my chest, watching with interest.
Hunter reached forward, grabbing a bag with the little clear rocks within it. I watched as he wrapped a decent sized rock in a tiny piece of toilet paper, placing it on his tongue, and washed it down with vodka.
Myles looked at me, a smirk curling his mouth. “Need a place to sit, dove?”
I hesitated. Myles was the last person I wanted to be around. Collin was hurt, so that was off the table, and he’d be the only other person I’d really consider. Actually, anyone would be better than Myles—even Foster. I could sit on the floor, but there was nowhere to support my back and it sounded like a worse option especially if I ended up getting blitzed out of my mind along with these douchebags.
Reluctantly, I made my way toward him. Just as I was about to sink onto his lap, a hand latched onto my arm and pulled me toward them, sitting me down. I didn’t have to ask who it was. Hunter had been the one sitting beside him.
Myles snorted in response. “Asshole.”
The guys all took turns, choosing their drug before they moved on to beverages. I shifted uncomfortably on Hunter’s lap, feeling weird sitting with him like this. He’s barely spoken a word to me since the club and he refused to look at me. Not that I minded it, but it did make things a little awkward. One of his hands rested on my hip as he leaned forward and used the other to grab his vodka from the table.
“Here,” Myles said, offering me a cup of fireball. “Hunter told us how much you like it.” He smirked, causing my face to heat.
Hesitantly, I reached for the cup and placed the rim to my lips, sucking down a large mouthful. My chest instantly burned from the intrusion of the fiery beverage, but it was nice. The last time I had fireball was with Hunter and Raven. My heart clenched at the memory. We’d played a game of dare and we both ended up sucking Hunter off before he made the two of us kiss in front of him.
As if sensing my inner turmoil, Hunter’s grip tightened around my waist. “Relax.” He breathed.
I could do that. Just for one night, I could relax and forget . I needed this like I needed oxygen. Ever since everything happened, my mind has been on anger and revenge constantly. It was exhausting. I’d go back to plotting when we got back to the academy. There wasn’t shit I could do now, anyways. No point in stewing while everyone else had fun.
“What’s that?” I asked, reaching forward to scoop up the baggy containing the little clear rocks. The same one that Hunter had taken earlier.
“Meth,” Myles answered easily. “Want some?”
My heart thudded beneath my ribcage sending warning bells to the back of my brain. I’d never done meth before, but I’d heard the horror stories. Meth was one of the worst drugs you could submit to. It had a way of changing a person and ruining their life. Worrying my lip between my teeth, I pushed a steady breath out. Did I want this? Was I willing to take the risk?
My life flashed before my eyes. Foster home after foster home, beating after beating, Avery’s blue eyes, the possibility I’d never see her again, Myles, the academy, Raven, everything . I swallowed the lump in my throat, my hands trembling around the baggy. What did I have left to lose? Reluctantly, I nodded and passed the bag over to Myles who had never taken his eyes off me.
I watched as he opened the bag and grabbed a toilet paper roll, ripping off a tiny piece and wrapping it around a rock.
“You can smoke it if you’d rather do that. The high isn’t as intense that way,” Collin offered.
I bit my lip nervously. I didn’t know a lot about drugs, but to me, meth was meth. It didn’t matter how it was ingested. Before I had a chance to reply, Myles was handing me the substance. My nose scrunched up with disgust as I eyed the toilet paper.
“It’s called parachuting,” Myles supplied with an amused twinkle in his eyes. “Just swallow it quickly and wash it down.”
“Why not eat it straight?” I questioned, furrowing my eyebrows.
He shrugged. “You could, but it’s harder on your organs and mouth if you do it like that.”
Blowing out a breath, I braced myself before putting it in my mouth and swallowing. I took a large gulp of my beverage, washing it down like he’d instructed. Hunter’s fingers ran soothing circles along the meat of my hip, causing goosebumps to erupt all over my body. Suddenly, I wasn’t sure if getting fucked up with them was the smartest thing I could have done.
They would have killed you by now if that was their plan.
I tried clinging to that thought and relaxed back into Hunter, my chest beating at a rapid pace. My hands worked through my long hair, smoothing it out over one of my shoulders. While the guys continued doing drugs, I focused on my drink. It didn’t take long for me to finish it and then Myles was refilling it for me.
After about three drinks, the high started to kick in. My entire body grew hot from both the alcohol and meth, making me jittery. My leg bounced repeatedly as I glanced around the room, my eyes locking on Foster’s. He was leaned back in the chair, his face flushed and eyes glassy. How was he so calm? My mind was a jumbled mess of thoughts, but they raced through so quickly, I couldn’t settle on a single one.
“I-It’s hot,” I stammered, pushing my bangs back off my forehead.
“It is,” Hunter agreed. “You want to step outside for a bit?”
I nodded eagerly and climbed off his lap, my head spinning from the sudden change in motion. Hunter inclined his head for his friends to follow before leading me out the back door. The cool air licked at my skin instantly, and while it should have been enough, my internal body temperature was through the roof.
I looked around, the inground pool coming into view. Part of me wanted to get in, but the other part of me was afraid of drowning. Nausea settled within my gut as flashbacks resurfaced. The pond, how the water had filled my lungs, the aching in my limbs as I fought for air.
“We can sit in the shallow end,” he suggested. “There’s a step we can sit on. We won’t let you get hurt.” His hand ran over my back, and I couldn’t help but lean into his touch. It felt nice.
“Okay,” I said a little too quickly, the heat in my body expanding from the alcohol and drugs I had taken.
He took off his shirt, his face as flushed as Foster’s was and his pupils blown wide. I watched as he kicked off his pants and boxers, my gaze dropping down to his dick. My thighs clenched together from the want—no—the need . Fuck. What was in this shit? The other guys started stripping around us except for Collin who settled onto a plastic chair, his heated gaze roaming over me.
I couldn’t imagine how I looked right now. These guys were obviously no strangers to hard substances, meaning they had more of an immunity to it.
Hunter took my hand and led me to the pool. He climbed in first, sitting on the second step. The cold water brushed against my skin as I entered, my breath leaving me in shallow pants. He scooted back and guided me to the spot in between his legs, his hardness brushing against my lower back. How was he still hard? Wasn’t the cold supposed to make it shrivel up? Must have been from whatever he’d taken. I was submerged in the water all the way up to my ribs, the slight waves of the liquid hitting my breasts every now and then as the other guys climbed in.
“How do you feel?” he asked, pulling my back flush against his chest.
“Like I’m on cloud nine.”
A laugh rumbled through him, and he grabbed a fistful of my hair, jerking so that my head fell back. A small gasp left me as he peered down, his eyes locking on mine. This time my heart was pounding for entirely different reasons. My back arched, causing my ass to press against him more. He released an animalistic growl, his eyes flashing with pure desire.
I licked my cracked lips, my mouth feeling drier than it ever has before. I wasn’t sure what came over me, but the urge to touch him was so strong. Hell, I’d probably fuck a complete stranger at this point. My hand moved behind my back until it found his throbbing cock. He shuddered when I grabbed him and started working him up and down, our eyes staying connected.
“Hunter,” Foster warned with an edge to his voice. He was waist-deep in the water, his hard gaze settling on the two of us, but I didn’t relent, just started working Hunter harder. Hunter’s head fell back, his grip loosening on my hair as he lost himself to the pleasure. “Hunter,” Foster snapped again. “She isn’t in her right mind.”
“She started touching me,” he grunted. “I didn’t instigate it.” He took my breast in his right hand, flicking his thumb over the nipple. Electricity buzzed through me, my lips parting as a gasp escaped me.
Foster muttered something I couldn’t hear and started making his way toward us. He was still wearing his boxers, but the outline of his hard dick was prominent through them. My mouth dried even more as I took him in. The water dribbled down his torso, leaving a shine behind on his pale skin. Once he approached, he scooped me in his arms, taking me away from Hunter.
“You’re an asshole,” I said with a leaden tongue as he carried me out of the water. His skin slid against mine as he walked with me, the feel of it only heightening my lust.
He dropped me in a chair beside Collin and wrapped a towel around my shoulders. I glared up at him, but he didn’t seem to give a shit. “I hope you drown,” I continued, not caring how childish and petty it sounded. His lips kicked up into an amused smirk and he shook his head while Collin laughed from beside me.
“Your skin is like ice,” Foster said. “Dry off and I’ll take you back inside to get warmed up.”
My forehead creased in confusion. I didn’t feel cold at all. I could probably stay out here for hours. To my knowledge, we hadn’t even been out here for that long. A pout tugged at my mouth. I wanted to stay with Hunter, to feel him writhe beneath me as I took what I wanted. Heat pooled in the depths of my stomach as my mind conjured up sinful images of what we could be doing right now.
Releasing a sigh, I dried myself off with the towel to the best of my abilities and stood. Foster motioned toward the back door and I reluctantly obliged, making my way into the heated cabin.
“I don’t want to sit on the couch,” I told him. “My skin sticks to it.”
He didn’t say anything. Instead, he walked into the kitchen and grabbed two bottles of water. When he approached me, he offered me one. I took it eagerly, unscrewing the cap, before placing it up to my mouth and guzzling down a mouthful. The cold water helped bring my internal body temperature down some, but I didn’t know how long that would last.
“Come,” he instructed. “You can sit on the bed while I shower.”
I nodded and followed him down a hallway. Everything seemed to move quickly as we walked, making it difficult to stop and take everything in. My head was a mess. He led me into a plain-looking bedroom with a king-sized bed in it. I moved over to it and flopped down, leaning against the wooden headboard with my legs stretched out in front of me.
He reached into the dresser and started putting some clothes together. He must have unpacked as soon as he got here. I watched as he carried them into the adjoined bathroom and closed the door gently.
A smile tugged at the corners of my mouth. With him in the shower, I could go back outside and mess around with Hunter. Then again, Hunter probably wouldn’t go against Foster like that after he was blatantly warned not to touch me. What was the point of getting drunk and high if you couldn’t get fucked while under the influence? A groan expelled from my lungs as frustration clawed at my insides. I couldn’t remember ever being turned on this much in my life.
I looked at the mundane wall across from me, feeling bored out of my mind. Myles would probably fuck me. My teeth sank into my lower lip as I thought on that. Deciding that he was my best option, I climbed out of bed and started making my way across the room. The sound of the shower running halted my movements, causing a new thought to sprout in my mind. Foster was in there naked, covered in water. I wanted to know what his limits were. Would he touch me like he had at the club? Would he go further now that he was high?
I drifted over to the bathroom door and tried the handle. To my surprise, it clicked open with ease. A smile tugged at my mouth, and I gently closed the door behind me.
My pulse roared in my ears as the blood rushed through me. A mixture of adrenaline and excitement coursed through my veins. For once, I didn’t care about the consequences. Maybe I needed to get fucked up more often.
My feet pressed against the tiles while I walked, not stopping until I’d finally reached the shower. It was plain—not like the ones at the academy. A black curtain separated us. I walked toward the end of the tub and pushed it aside, stepping inside. Foster’s back was to me as his hands worked through his blonde hair. The muscles in his shoulders tensed with every movement he made.
When he finally turned, his eyes widened like saucers and he stumbled backwards, nearly slipping in the process. “What the fuck are you doing in here?” he growled.
I shrugged. “I got bored, and you cockblocked me. There’s a price for that.” The luke-warm water pooled around my feet as I stood at the opposite end of the tub, staring him down with defiance.
“You’re fucking crazy,” he muttered, but he wasn’t nearly as pissed as I expected him to be.
A slow smile stretched across my face as I took a step forward, and then another, until there were only inches separating us. His throat bobbed as he swallowed, and for the first time since I’d met him, he looked…nervous. My gaze tracked down his body until it reached his dick. Fuck he was huge. Much bigger than Collin and Hunter. Maybe it had to do with his height.
Water sprayed me now since I was closer to the showerhead, the droplets pelting my skin and running down my body. He glanced down, taking in my heaving chest before he dropped his gaze lower.
“I can make you feel good,” I purred. His eyes snapped back to mine, his jaw tightening.
“You don’t know what you’re saying.”
I shrugged. “I know what I want.” My tongue darted out, swiping against my lips as I took another cautious step forward. We were so close now I could feel the heat of his body pouring onto mine. “I’m not going to bed tonight until I get what I want,” I continued. “If it’s not from you, it’ll be from someone else in this cabin.”
He blew out a breath. “Christ,” he muttered, clenching his eyes closed. When he opened them again, his eyelids were hooded, heat pouring through them. “What is that you want exactly?”
So many things.
I reached forward, taking his dick in my fist. He immediately tensed, fear slithering through him. I watched with interest as his chest heaved up and down like he was battling internally.
“Do you want me to let go?” I asked, worry settling inside me.
I’ve touched him before, and every time I had, he snapped. A few days ago, when we slept in the same bed and I’d removed the pillows, he freaked out and choked the shit out of me. Anything could happen, right now. He could hit me, choke me again, freak out and leave. The possibilities were endless.
He slightly shook his head, but I could see the emotions flashing across his face. He was torn between wanting this and something else I couldn’t quite place.
I started stroking him up and down making him hiss out. My eyes never left his face, afraid that if I looked away, the switch would flip again. Without warning, he grabbed me by my arms and tugged me forward, mashing our chests together. His lips parted as he allowed me to pleasure him, his hands tight around my arms and his body trembling.
“Crouch down a little,” I said breathlessly, not even sure what I planned on doing.
He only hesitated for a moment before he listened, putting us a little more on the same level. Spreading my legs, I eased forward, pressing him against me. His body locked up instantly, and fear coursed through him.
“Relax,” I soothed. “I’m not going to fuck you.”
He blew out a breath, his movements ridged before he slowly started to relax and allow me to do what I wanted. Placing my hand beneath the bottom of his shaft, I used it to guide him over my slick folds, grinding on him.
“Holy shit,” he said, his eyes rolling from the intense feeling.
My breathing increased as electricity shot through my core. He felt so fucking good against me. I rocked along him, a moan slipping free as I worked to pleasure us both. Slowly, he released my arms, moving them up to cradle my face. Our breaths mingled together before his lips brushed against mine slowly, unsure, hesitantly.
I didn’t know what the hell we were even doing. He probably didn’t either. But in this moment, it felt way too good to even contemplate stopping. His cock slid against my clit, sending bolts of electricity spiraling through me with every movement. His hands tightened around my face as he deepened the kiss, a growl rumbling through him when I placed my foot on the edge of the tub and worked him faster against me.
I was about to make Foster Henderson come. The virgin who couldn’t stand to be touched by women. He was going to come for me . That thought alone heightened the heat radiating through my body. I wanted him inside me so badly but knew better than to push my luck with him. He was always a thought away from snapping and shattering it all.
Soft gasps fluttered past my lips, and he devoured them all, his hands dropping around me to cup my ass where he proceeded to squeeze. His tongue slipped into my mouth, sliding against mine softly. He was testing the waters, trying to figure out what he could handle.
What happened to him? It was so obvious he wanted this, but there was doubt written all over him. He was traumatized by something, and I wanted to know what.
He broke the kiss, resting his forehead against mine. His body continued to tremble as I pushed him toward the edge of his release.
“Does it feel okay?” I whispered, yearning for his approval. I didn’t know what I’d do if he asked me to stop.
“Like fucking heaven.”
Warmth spread through me from his admission. I knew my head wasn’t acting right from the alcohol and drugs, but I couldn’t find it in me to care. The only thing that mattered was getting him off. Sober me wouldn’t have done this. He gripped my ass tightly, lifting me just a smidge and helped guide me along his dick. My heart rate sped up and the heat exploded through me. I was so close. So, fucking close. In no time, I was shattering all over him, moaning like a whore in church. Who knew that sex wasn’t the only way to unravel a person so intensely?
“Fuck,” he groaned, gripping me even tighter, his breathing labored. His warmth shot all over my pussy, making me shudder.
I collapsed against his chest, leaving my hands at my sides. His grip on me didn’t falter as we both breathed heavily against one another for a few minutes, working to steady our rapidly beating hearts. It wasn’t sex, but it still felt amazing.
His lips brushed against my head, surprising me with the gentle action. “W-We can’t do that again,” he said. “I’m sorry. It shouldn’t have happened.” As much as I hated it, he was right. This was a one-time thing. Spurred on by drugs, alcohol, and lust. Come tomorrow morning, we’d probably both regret it.