Chapter 32
DELANEY
“Can you grab me the plates?”
Parker brought the plates I’d set out earlier to me at the stove. Starting with the angel hair and then topping it with my mother’s chicken francaise, I brought the empty pan to the sink while Parker carried our plates to the table.
It was the first time I’d cooked him a meal, and I wanted to make it perfect.
Turning down the kitchen lights—I’d worry about the dishes later—I carried our glasses of wine to the small dining room I rarely used.
With a view of the fireplace and a single candle set in the middle of the table, it was perfectly romantic.
We ate, talking about my dad’s treatment for pre-diabetes and the fact that Parker now had a new stepmother he had never met.
Yesterday we’d both met with the small business development center, Parker to have eyeballs on his business plan and me to learn about one in the first place.
They’d also been able to verify that, yes, my building was still available just in case I wanted to move forward.
“The amount of work that it would require seems daunting,” I said.
“Yesterday I talked with the owner of a pottery studio in Seneca, and she was super helpful. Essentially, I would be starting two separate businesses, one retail and the other to offer classes. She suggested I start small with one product or focus. I love jewelry and painting equally, though, and have no idea which would be a better starting point.”
“What about that jewelry shop in Skaneateles? Did you ever get in touch with them?”
“I did.” Telling Parker all about our conversation, I watched as he finished his meal, sat back and listened intently to me. Having someone to bounce ideas off, especially someone going through the same process, was priceless.
“The big question,” he said, standing up and taking our plates into the kitchen. “Have you talked to your parents yet?”
Coming back to the table and picking up his wine, Parker settled back in.
“No,” I said. “With everything going on with my dad…” I shrugged. “I did talk to my brother, though. He was encouraging, as expected. I just don’t want to go there until I’m certain about the whole thing. No point freaking them out if I change my mind.”
Parker’s brows raised. “Change your mind? As in, you’ve made the decision to go for it?”
That was the question of the hour. “Not completely. The thought of quitting my job is just…” How could I put it into words? Scary didn’t quite do it justice. “Permanent. That job won’t be there if the studio fails.”
It wasn’t the first time we’d talked about this, and I knew Parker’s stance.
He didn’t say it outright, but he thought a lifetime was too long not to like your job.
I agreed, on an emotional level, but every time I thought about all that schooling and how excited my mom had been that the position in Cedar Falls had opened up, it actually made me a little nauseous.
“Maybe writing your business plan and seeing what Pia comes up with in her research will help ease your mind. But,” he cautioned, “at the end of the day, you’ll have to get comfortable with the idea of risk too. There’s never any guarantees when you’re talking about starting your own business.”
All true.
One thing that was guaranteed? I wanted to make this journey with Parker.
Every day we spent together solidified the fact that we were perfect for each other.
Not to say there wasn’t a disagreement here and there.
The other day we learned something valuable about each other.
Namely, where Parker wanted to address and discuss any potential problems immediately, I tended to hold them in, take time to process first, and then address.
But at least we’d figured that out and agreed, though we had different styles of communication at times, the important thing was that eventually we talked it out.
“Keep looking at me like that, cupcake, and this dinner date is going to turn into an overnighter real quick.”
“I’d be okay with that,” I said, aware of the fact we’d just had a discussion about maintaining our own spaces for now. This was still very new, and neither of us wanted to jump into essentially living together after just a few weeks.
On the other hand, nights we spent alone sucked. I thought about him sleeping alone in a bed just a few minutes away at Heritage Hill and, more than once, had to stop myself from getting in my car and showing up on the inn’s doorstep.
“Yeah?”
He stood up.
Dressed in jeans and a button down, sleeves rolled, knowing how much I loved that, Parker made his way over to me. Spinning my chair around, he squatted down in front of me. Never knowing what he was up to, my heart began to race.
Parker knew I was anticipating something. His slow smile told me it would be good too.
“What did I tell you about wearing leggings?” he asked, running his hand up my calf.
I swallowed. “That I should only wear them if I didn’t care whether or not you ripped them off my body. Or something like that.”
He chuckled. “Yeah. Something like that.”
Parker pulled my legs open. As he did, my phone buzzed. “Check,” he said. “Make sure Dad’s okay.”
I loved him. There was zero doubt about it. I absolutely had fallen in love with this man, and I just had to find the right time to tell him. Or wait for him to say it first. I still wasn’t sure which.
Reaching over to the table, I grabbed it, just to be sure my father was fine, and brought it down to my lap to see.
Parker and I both stared at the name that popped up in a text.
Makis.
He stood up.
I closed my legs and clicked on the message.
Please talk to me. I miss you D.
Looking up, I wished I hadn’t. Parker was pissed.
“I thought you were blocking him after his last text.”
I tossed the phone onto the table and stood too. “I never texted him back,” I said. “And then didn’t think of it again. His number got buried?—”
“Delaney,” Parker said in a tone that was unusual for him. “You can’t tell me you forgot completely. That your ex-boyfriend, the one that crushed your spirit, comes back from the dead, and you don’t think about it for a second? Enough to remember to block his number?”
I didn’t answer. It wasn’t that I was trying to lie to him, but I didn’t want Parker to think there was anything there. My feelings for Makis were dead and buried.
“Maybe for a second,” I admitted. “But I’m just not that kind of person. I’ve never unfriended or blocked someone in my life. It feels almost mean. But that doesn’t?—”
“Mean? You didn’t want to be mean to the guy that treated you like absolute shit? Come on, Delaney. You can do better than that.”
He’d walked into the living room, and something stopped me from following him.
Parker wasn’t being himself, and there wasn’t much more for me to say.
I didn’t block him. But I should have. And here we were.
Maybe it made no sense to Parker, but that was the truth.
“There’s nothing there,” I said quietly.
“I should have blocked him,” I admitted.
Waiting for Parker to accept my words, knowing he would because that was the guy he was, I headed to the kitchen in the meantime.
Started doing the dishes. Remembering the conversation we’d just had about disagreements.
Parker liked to talk things out. Not let them “stew.” I would block Makis’s ass in front of him, explain once more there really wasn’t anything there and…
No. Better yet, I’d be even more honest. I would tell Parker how I really felt about him. How could I possibly care a lick about Makis when I was deeply, head over heels in love with Parker?
Turning off the water, I dried my hands, hoping it was enough time for Parker to cool off, and headed into the living room.
But I couldn’t tell Parker I loved him. Because he was gone.