Chapter 36
GRACE
Three Weeks Later
“Everything here looks great.” Dr. Stratton finishes prodding at my belly. “Baby is in a head-down position, so there are no concerns for a home birth.”
“That’s great news.” I smile, although Jack still looks like he needs convincing.
“Now we just need to hope little one doesn’t get stubborn on us.” She starts packing away her things.
“What do you mean, stubborn?” Jack offers me his arm for support when I try to sit up.
“In some cases, the baby decides they like where they are and chooses to keep everyone waiting. You can go over your due date by a week or two, but after that, we have to start considering induction. Unfortunately, hospital is the only option in that circumstance.”
It’s not the news I want to hear, but I refuse to let it ruin my mood. I’ve been a lot more in control of my emotions this past week, and with only three more days left until my due date, I have to keep a positive mindset. If I think too much about leaving, I start talking myself out of it.
“Well, we’ll just have to make sure he doesn’t get too comfortable.” I stand up and start pacing the room.
“Staying active can often help get things moving,” she informs me, picking up her bag.
“Are you finding your accommodation suitable?” Jack asks, stepping over to me and trying to get me to sit back down.
“Very.” She smiles, and I shrug Jack away and look between them, confused.
“I’ve put Dr. Stratton up in one of the estate cottages,” he explains, stroking the bottom of my back.
“I thought it would be beneficial to have her close when things start happening.” It’s really starting to dawn on me that this baby could come any day.
I don’t know if I’m more nervous about the labour or sad that everything's coming to an end.
“I have two local midwife teams on call, ready to assist; everything is ready. We’re just waiting on baby.” She smiles reassuringly.
“Do we really need midwives, as well as you? I'd much prefer it to be just the two of us.” I can’t imagine anything worse than a bunch of strangers crowded around me when I’m in pain.
“When the time comes, we will make as little interference as possible; a lot of couples like to keep the experience intimate.” I like that she sounds so reassuring, but I can see that Jack is still uncomfortable with the whole idea.
“Hopefully, I’ll be seeing you both very soon,” she tells us before she sees herself out.
“Gracie, what are you doing?” Jack asks when I start making my way back to the room where I still keep all my clothes.
“You heard the woman, I’m making sure I stay active.” I pull a jumper out from my closet and attempt to stretch it over my bulging stomach. “It’s a nice crisp day; I think I’ll take a walk around the grounds.” I grin cheerily as I pass him.
“Are you that desperate to get away from me?” he chuckles, taking my hand and pulling me back. “You don’t need to panic, we’re not even at your due date yet; besides, we have things we need to discuss.”
“What kind of things?”
“Plans for after the birth.” He lowers his eyes to the floor.
“Fine.” I may not like thinking about it, but that doesn’t mean I can pretend it’s not happening. I have a few questions myself. “But we can walk and talk?” I continue walking out the door, hearing him sigh in defeat as he follows me.
“I think it’s time for you to sit down.” Jack stops again when we get to a bench near the clearing to the woods.
“I’m absolutely fine,” I lie, out of breath and feeling like I’m carrying a boulder.
“You're not fine.” He places his hand under my belly.
“What are you doing?” I laugh at how awkward he’s making it for himself to walk.
“If you insist on doing more walking, I'll take some of the weight.”
I shake my head and continue moving forward.
“So what did you want to discuss?” I get us onto the subject we’ve both been avoiding. The house is in view again, and I don’t think I can convince him to let us do another lap of the perimeter.
“Well, most importantly, I’d like to know how long you're prepared to stay once he arrives.” He gets that same sorrowful look in his eyes that's there whenever we talk about me leaving.
“We agreed it wouldn’t have to be a year if I gave you a child,” I remind him, knowing that if I stay here too long, it would be impossible not to bond with this baby. I’ve no doubt that watching Jack be a father would make me fall for him even harder, too.
“I understand you wish to leave as soon as you can, but you will need time to recover, and the first few days—”
“I’ve read up on the importance of breastfeeding,” I interrupt, pressing my hand into the base of my spine to support it. “I’m happy to express so he gets a good supply.” I don’t much like the idea of being milked like a cow, but I do want what's best for the baby.
“I’d like you to recover here, where I can take care of you. Labour is a lot for your body to go through and—”
“Do you really think that's a good idea?” I stop walking and look up at him. “I don’t want to get to know him. He’s yours, not mine. Once my duty of getting him here safely is done, I’d rather move on. I’ve kept the girls waiting long enough.”
“Gracie, you need to at least give yourself a week before you start dashing out of the country. Especially if you refuse to have this baby in the hospital. I know you care deeply for the girls, but you have to think about yourself.”
‘I am thinking of myself,” I assure him sternly, continuing to walk in an awkward silence with him, until we get to the house.
“You should head upstairs and rest,” he tells me when we get inside, sliding his hand from where it still rests beneath my stomach and looking crushed.
“I was going out to the garden to do some reading.” I smile, kissing his cheek and moving through the living room, so I can access the back garden through the patio doors.
I smile to myself when I get to the summer house and see the changes he’s made.
There are thick, cosy furs on the chair now; he’s even had a small wood stove installed in the corner.
I don’t know when he found the time to get all this done, but it looks so snug and welcoming.
I carefully lower myself to sink into the chair and pick up The Cat in the Hat.
“You like this one, don’t you?” I stroke my tummy before opening the book and reading to my little boy.
“How long have you been there?” I ask, opening my eyes and seeing Jack resting on the floor opposite me, watching me sleep.
“I don’t know, an hour, maybe.” I feel a heat coming from beside me, and when I turn my head, I notice that he’s lit the fire and covered me with a blanket.
“You’ve made it cosy in here.” I use the armrest to help me shift position when I realise my ass has gone numb.
“Do you have nothing better to do than watch me sleep?” I laugh, feeling an elbow push out against the hand I’m using to steady my bump.
“Have to make the most of you while I have you.” He smiles sadly.
“Jack, I don’t want the baby to come quickly because I want to get away from you.
” I feel the need to explain myself. “You’ve made my time here, and this whole experience, more than I could have wished for.
I just don’t want to have to give birth in a hospital.
” I’d be more than happy to feel the baby moving around inside me and have Jack hold me close, the way he does so protectively, for another two weeks.
“I get that, and I don’t want to be selfish.
You know how I feel about you leaving; it breaks my heart.
But this isn’t about me. I want you to be comfortable and stress-free when the time comes.
I want to take care of you.” He sits up on his knees in front of me and slides the blanket from my belly so he can grasp it in both hands.
“Please, let me do that, just for the first week he’s here. ”
I know it’s stupid of me to agree; it’s going to make leaving them both behind excruciating, but I like the idea of knowing what we’d be like as a family too much to refuse.
“One week.” I nod, watching him smile when his son's foot sticks out and rolls across my belly.
“I still find it insane that he moves around like that,” he laughs.
“He’s really running out of space in there,” I point out.
“What can I do to make these next few days, or weeks, while we wait, more comfortable for you?” he asks, looking up at me seriously.
“Well, you can start by assisting me in giving him the message that it’s time to vacate.
Olivia told me that sex is a good labour starter.
” I decide to lighten the mood. Jack’s right, we should be making the most of our time together, not being sad about it ending.
“I’d also like to see the girls. It’s been such a long time, and I want to try and get things between Polly and me fixed before the baby comes.
” I’m starting to panic that she won’t want to come with us.
“Consider it done.” He stands up, holding out his hand to help me up.
“You know, we could just do it here.” I stroke the fur throw I’m sitting on, thinking it would be kinda hot to fuck out here, in front of the fire.
“Friends first, fucking later.” He drags me up, supporting my belly at the same time.
“I’d like to keep you in this condition for at least a few hours longer.” He kisses me and strokes my belly proudly.
“You really do think you have a magic cock, don’t you?” I roll my eyes. “I don’t think it works just like that.”
“You also didn’t think I’d knock you up first attempt, but…” His eyes fall to the huge, swollen tummy between us. “Come on, let's go see your friends, then we’ll come home, and I’ll make love to you until you beg me for mercy.”
Him calling it that makes me realise that that is exactly what we do. It’s what we’ve been doing this whole time. I could blame the connection I feel to him on the fact that I’m carrying his child, but the truth is, it’s been there from the very start.
“What's on your mind, Gracie girl?” he asks with a grin on his face.