Chapter 14 #2
An image appeared on my screen of Kai and Rosie. They were curled up in bed together, his arm around her little body, holding her close. It made me smile.
Me: So much for the no-sleeping-on-the-bed rule.
Halle: Don’t even try to pretend that you don’t let her sleep on the bed with you.
A laugh burst out of me. Halle was right. I was totally a sucker when it came to Rosie. She was just too cute.
And something in my chest eased at the fact that Halle was teasing me. I was hanging on to her words like a lifeline. Fuck me, I was so desperate for this woman I’d take any morsel she’d give, no matter how small.
Me: Looks like I have some serious competition for Rosie’s affection.
Halle: I love how you’re worried about that. Because here I am thinking I’m going to have to get him a dog if it helps him relax like that. Thanks. A. Lot.
I knew she was teasing. But I was glad that Rosie had helped Kai. I sank down on the edge of the mattress, still staring at the screen.
Me: Like I said, he can hang with Rosie whenever he wants.
Three dots appeared on the screen, dancing before disappearing. Then danced again. I wondered what she was thinking. About the almost-kiss. About what I’d said. Did she want to give us a chance? Was she even considering it?
When her message finally came through, I damn near dropped my phone.
Halle: Thanks, Jasper.
I started typing out a new message. Deleted it. Tried again. Cleared it again.
Instead of asking her what I really wanted to, I ultimately resorted to talking about work. I updated her on what I’d discovered about the stairs. I figured if she’d checked her emails, she would’ve already said something about it by now.
Halle: Unbelievable.
Halle: I guess it makes me feel better and worse that the door wouldn’t open.
Me: Same.
I was tempted to apologize again for getting us stuck, but in the end, I realized I wasn’t sorry. I regretted the fact that she’d worried about Kai. But I would never take back the time we’d spent together or the things I’d said.
With my fingers poised over the keyboard, I wondered if I should mention it or leave it be? If we’d just had a minute more… I sighed. Maybe I would’ve known what she was going to say. Maybe…
Another message came through, and my hope inflated like a fucking balloon. And then it deflated just as quickly when I read it.
Halle: It’s getting late, and we have an early flight tomorrow. I’m going to head to bed.
Fuck.
What did that mean?
Maybe it just means that she’s tired. Maybe it means that she needs more time. Either way, I knew now wasn’t the time to push.
Me: Sleep well.
After a few minutes, when no new message came, I flopped back on the bed with a groan. God, I’m pathetic.
The next morning, I climbed the stairs of the jet, feeling tired and stiff and cranky.
I’d barely slept, and my body was sore from sitting on the concrete for all that time.
I’d gone for a run and done a brief yoga and stretching video in my room, thanks to our company-wide in-house workout library.
But I could definitely use a sauna and a massage and a good night’s sleep.
I’d jacked off in the shower this morning, but it hadn’t done much. The kind of release I craved was something only Halle could give me. I sighed, still not sure where we stood after last night.
I tucked my bag into one of the overhead compartments and greeted the pilot before Tabitha emerged from the galley, smiling. She was our family’s preferred flight attendant, and we asked the Hartwell Agency to staff her almost exclusively.
“Morning, Jasper. Can I get you anything? A drink or some breakfast?”
“Morning.” I studied her. Something about her always seemed so…familiar. Though I didn’t know why, and I couldn’t put my finger on the reason. Whatever it was, it put me at ease. “Maybe some coffee after we take off.”
“Of course. Latte with oat milk, right?”
“Exactly. Thanks.”
Kendall was next to board the plane, talking to someone behind her before Halle appeared. She turned to face me, and when she lifted her head, I was hit with such a pang of longing that it felt as if my heart had stopped. Halted and then restarted at double speed.
Fuck. I clutched my chest. Fuck me.
“You okay?” Knox asked.
I’d been so distracted, I hadn’t even noticed he’d boarded the plane. “Yeah. I’m good. You?”
“Glad to be going home.” He gave me a hug just as Nate and Emerson boarded.
Emerson joined Halle and Kendall. I took a seat while the crew finished their preparations for takeoff. Restless energy thrummed through me, and I tried to study Halle without attracting notice.
“Where did you disappear to last night?” Knox asked, taking a seat across from me.
Nate gave me a knowing look. “Did you find someone to keep you company? Give the winning bidder a preview of the bachelorx date?”
“I—” Shit.
I could feel Halle’s gaze boring into the side of my head.
Halle and I hadn’t discussed how to handle this because we hadn’t expected anyone to even notice we’d gone missing.
So instead of telling them that I’d found myself locked in a stairwell, which would’ve inevitably led to more questions, I decided to keep it vague.
“Something like that.” The words felt wrong the moment I said them aloud.
But what else was I supposed to say?
I felt as if I’d surpassed everyone else’s ideas on who I was and what I was capable of. It felt like…like how it felt to outgrow your clothes. They were tight and uncomfortable and no longer reflected your style.
But for now, these were the clothes I had to continue to wear. If it meant protecting Halle. Even if lying to my family meant gaining Halle’s trust, then I would do whatever it took.
“How was the rest of the evening? Any surprises?” I asked, eager to refocus the conversation away from me.
Knox chuckled. “Apparently one of the rookies from the Hawks had been running a social media campaign to hype up interest. He went for almost as much as Holden Hansley.”
I chuckled. “Which rookie?”
“Kovi.” And then he added, “Carson Kovalsky.”
The pilot announced that it was time for takeoff, and the plane turned, likely angling toward the runway.
I tapped on my phone, navigating to Carson’s social media.
The guy was photogenic; I’d give him that.
And he knew how to use social media to his advantage.
He had a mix of videos and stills, and he was shirtless or holding a hockey stick in most of them.
“How much?” I asked once we were in the air. Halle and I had been locked in the stairwell long before any of the players from the Hawks had taken the stage.
“Twenty-three thousand.”
“Damn.” I whistled low. “Good for him.”
“The audience was rabid when he went onstage,” Nate said as the plane leveled out.
The captain announced that we were free to move about the cabin. Tabitha delivered my latte, and I thanked her. Then she circulated the cabin, taking drink orders.
I inhaled slowly, taking a sip as a memory from last night floated through my mind. Me tracing Halle’s fingers as I explained the mindfulness exercise. Each inhale had been shaky. Each exhale just as much so. I’d done the exercise countless times, but it had never felt so…erotic.
“Were you talking about Carson?” Kendall asked. When Knox nodded, she added, “Because he’s definitely getting invited back next year.” She then turned to Halle to resume their conversation.
Emerson unbuckled and moved over to take the seat next to Nate.
He draped his arm over her shoulder, and I’d never felt more jealous than in that moment.
I was happy for Nate, truly. But I wanted what he and Emerson had.
I wanted to be able to show Halle affection in front of my family.
Fuck. Even just not having to pretend I felt nothing for her when she was in the room would be a welcome change.
“I was thinking we should try to get Carson to do some classes for the Huxley Grand’s in-house exercise program,” Emerson said.
“Yes.” I pointed at her, loving that idea. “Yes. Do that.”
Since marrying Nate, Emerson had taken an active role in the wellness component of the brand.
She had so many great ideas and contacts in the industry, and I was always impressed with the experiences she developed.
She and Lily were also working on some wellness retreats for the Fleur-de-lis line that were brilliant.
“Awesome. I’ll reach out to him,” Emerson said, making a note in her phone.
“Great. Thanks.” I set my coffee mug on the side table, and Tabitha quickly whisked it away before asking if I’d like anything else.
I had to hand it to Kendall; the auction had been a huge success.
It had not only raised a ton of money but garnered a lot of positive attention for the foundation and its mission.
I still wasn’t looking forward to my charity date, but I hoped it would be a fun, easy afternoon.
Maybe a helicopter ride, lunch on the terrace at the hotel.
Even so, I resented the idea of giving up some of my limited free time to a stranger. No matter how much she’d donated.
Maybe next year I will no longer be a bachelor.
The thought came to me unbidden, and I couldn’t help but hope that it might be true. That Halle and I would find a way to be together, because I was done with being apart. And I was going to do everything in my power to show her that she could trust me. To remind her how great we were together.