Chapter 14
Fourteen
Paloma
T he anger I felt at my former life was a molten rage by the time we walked through the department store at the mall. They’d manipulated me; they’d manipulated all of us, and for what? To be gods of their own domain? For power over us lesser folk?
A steady thrum of strength pulsed down my bond with Llew, and I took a deep breath. The mall was… a lot. Filled with people, from screaming toddlers to whole groups of teens—staring at what I now knew was some kind of telephone—to people as old as Brother Whitt from the Homestead. There were so many people here that it seemed almost unbelievable. I gripped Rio’s hand tightly, his strong body like a pillar I could tie myself to. A safe harbor. It helped that his scowl made everyone else get out of the way, so no one got too close.
Max seemed to be the master of making lists, and he had a list of everything that I would need. There were things on that list I didn’t even know, let alone understand the necessity for.
I had a big woolen hat pulled down over my head, even though it was late spring, so not cold enough to warrant it. I didn’t care. I didn’t want to wear the lace veil, but I also didn’t want to go out with my head exposed in public.
“Okay, nesting materials,” Max said lightly. “Just touch anything and see what you like.”
I frowned. “Like, for what?”
“For your nest,” Rio murmured. “That little nook in your bedroom is a nest, and you can fill it full of anything that makes you happy. Like this pillow.” He pulled a fluffy blue square pillow from the pile and handed it to me. “Do you like how this feels?”
I stroked my fingers through the fabric. It was so soft, so fluffy, I imagined it was what clouds felt like. Nodding, I rubbed my cheek against it, and Max smiled, taking it from me and putting it in the already overflowing cart.
“Perfect. What about this one?” He picked up another pillow, and while it looked soft, it was ribbed and rough. I hated it viscerally. Shaking my head, I quickly passed it back to him.
Rio chuckled low. “Trust those instincts. Anything that makes you happy like the first pillow, even if you just like the color, or the way it looks, you put it in the cart. That goes with clothes, lights, blankets—anything you want.” He leaned down and rubbed his cheek on mine, like he couldn’t help himself. When I didn’t push him away, Max leaned down and did the other cheek, and I flushed pink. I just wanted to purr and curl up in their arms.
Max kissed my cheek softly. “I’m just going to get some other supplies. I’ll leave you in Rio’s capable hands.” Smiling goofily, he wandered away, and I watched his butt as he left. It was a nice butt. Firm and hugged tightly by the casual pants he wore. Could I be envious of a piece of clothing?
Grabbing the cart with one hand, Rio twined his fingers in mine and gently tugged me along. “Are you checking out my Beta, Omega?” he teased.
“Checking out?” I wasn’t sure what that meant.
Tugging me closer, he let me sink into his warmth. “Appreciating the way his body looks with your eyes. I understand, though; Max has always been the most attractive of our Pack, both inside and out.”
I frowned, because while I couldn’t argue that Max was indeed handsome, they were all appealing in their own way, to both the woman and the Omega in me. I didn’t know how to express that to Rio without admitting I was indeed “checking out” Max, or sounding like I wanted to betray my new Alpha already. So I said nothing, just snuggled into Rio’s side as he dragged me around the soft furnishings aisles, putting anything I even lingered for a second on into the cart.
Finally, we walked over to a large counter, where a girl with a bright, smiling face and long golden hair greeted us. “Get everything you need?” she purred at Rio, dismissing me completely.
The barely suppressed rage I’d been holding onto all day rose up inside me, and I gritted my teeth. I wanted to lash out, but instead, I swallowed it down. Aggression was punished; subservience was rewarded. No one wanted an aggressive wife. An aggressive Omega.
Missing my veil, I stared down at my feet, so the people in front of me couldn’t see the crazy rising up inside me. Damaged. Broken. Useless.
“Paloma?” I looked up at Rio, and whatever he saw in my expression had him frowning. “Are you okay?”
Nodding, I forced a smile onto my face. “Yes. I’m fine.” Almost unwillingly, my eyes flicked to the girl behind the counter, who looked as if she was feasting on Rio’s good looks. This was a prime example of “checking out.”
But Rio was mine.
A soft snarl reached my ears, and my cheeks darkened to red when I realized it was me. I was growling.
Leader Malakai would be horrified right now.
Rio turned his back on the girl, an eyebrow raised. “You don’t seem fine, Omega.”
How did I explain to him that I wanted to claw out the eyes of a perfect stranger, then stomp on them so she could never look at him again?
“I don’t know…” My eyes slipped back to the girl, who was now staring, and I ripped my gaze away, embarrassment making me hot.
Rio leaned forward, brushing his lips across mine. It was a soft caress, but I could feel the claiming in them. He was declaring that he was mine in front of this beautiful girl, who would look amazing beside him. Who wasn’t stunted emotionally and socially. Who wasn’t damaged inside and out.
Like he could sense my thoughts, he deepened the kiss. He wasn’t just marking himself as mine, he was claiming me as his. A soft noise that I didn’t understand bubbled up in my throat and into his mouth.
Rio pulled back and smiled down at me. That expression was like… It made my chest feel too big, too full. Rio’s smiles were like the first sunny day after a long winter. “Are you purring for me, Omega?” I flushed again, and he wrapped me up in his arms. He finished paying for our stuff and walked out of the shop, not saying anything to the attendant who’d served us.
“Where are we going?” I asked as he hustled me through the mall.
“To find Max so I can tell him how beautifully you purr.”
“Rio,” I gasped, and he laughed.
We got to a large, open cavity in the mall, and my feet stilled as I looked up. “Oh my…” I breathed, and Rio stilled beside me.
In the empty mall cavity were hanging shards of shiny mirror. Or maybe it was metal or glass; I wasn’t sure. But it swayed gently in some artificial air, twisting like bright stars in the sky and adjusting colours, depending on which way the mirrored pieces spun.
“It reminds me of these extinct creatures I read about once, shifting colors like that,” I breathed to Rio as I watched it in rapt attention. “They’d adjust the coloring on their scales, depending on their environment.”
Rio frowned. “Do you mean a chameleon?”
“Yes. Reading the National Geographics in Leader Malakai’s office was my bad habit. I’d sneak in there and read about all these old animals and technologies…” But they weren’t old. They were modern. The disconnect was still embedded in my brain.
Watching my face, Rio pulled me back to his chest. “Chameleons still exist. You can keep them as pets.”
I chewed my lip, holding back the tears. “How can I function in this world when everything I know as true is a lie?” My voice broke, and he tucked me tightly against him.
“We will help you every step of the way. Llew, Max, and me. August. Otillie-James and Lance and their Pack. You have a network for anything you want to do from now on. I swear to you, I’ll tell you nothing but the truth. No lies between us.”
“Do you promise?” It wouldn’t be that easy. I didn’t think I could accept anyone’s word ever again. But with Llewellyn and his Pack—my Pack now, I guess—surely I could center myself in their truth?
“I swear on my life, Paloma. No matter what, no matter how painful I think you’ll find the truth, I won’t ever lie to you.”
And just like that, he’d given me a foundation to stand on. When the world felt like quicksand, Rio would be there, giving me solid ground.
I felt exhausted, the day sucking the very energy from my core. Licking my dry lips, I pulled away from him and looked up at the mesmerizing piece of engineering. I would learn. I might be floundering now, but I would learn. I could read. I wasn’t stupid, and I could work hard.
I looked up at Rio. “Where can I get books? I want to know everything.”
He gave me a solemn look, but kissed the top of my head. “We’ll stop at the public library on the way home. It’s just around the corner from our house, and you can get as many books as you can hold. And then I’ll show you the internet.”
“The World Wide Web still exists?”
His low chuckle washed over me. “Yeah, it does, and I promise you, it’s a scary, wonderful place. Let’s go home.”
Home. Home was with Llew. With Rio and Max.
And I laid another foundation stone to my life.