Chapter 12 #2
Out in the sun, things didn’t seem as strange as they did inside the house. They turned left; Lisa didn’t know where they were headed, but she trusted her mother.
They walked a few blocks until they reached a large park with tall stone columns like the guardians of the gate to a fortress. Beyond the entrance, Lisa could see a path that circled a lake. Even from a distance she could see runners weaving in and out among the mothers with strollers and toddlers.
Gladys squeezed Lisa’s arm. “So, what’s on your mind sweetheart? Why the questions about what I think of Adam?”
“I’m just curious. You two didn’t seem to like each other much today.”
“You know we’ve never been close.” Gladys stopped at a bench by the water. “Here, let’s talk.” The back of the bench had an inscription. For Laurie, with all my love, Michael. Lisa was struck by the permanence of Michael’s love for Laurie. Here it was, etched for all to see forever, or as long as the bench lasted. Upon closer inspection, sun and visitors had started fading the wood planks from a deep brown to a splotchy beige.
Lisa sat close to her mother, holding her hand. “I’m so happy to see you again. To be here with you.”
Gladys smiled at her daughter, eyes bright. “That’s sweet to hear, but you just saw me last week, honey.” Gladys tilted her head as if examining her daughter’s face. “I sense there’s more to this being happy to see me.”
Lisa laughed. “You always knew me so well; I thought you could read my mind.”
“I always told you since you were little. I know…” Lisa joined her in the last word, “Everything!”
As they laughed at their old inside joke, Lisa decided to confide in her. Maybe if her mother knew about the time traveling, she’d have an idea of how to fix her marriage to Adam. She opened and closed her mouth several times, seeking the right words.
“Out with it, Lisa.”
“You’ll think I’m crazy.”
“Try me. I’m your mother. I’ve seen it all.”
Lisa gazed at her mother’s eyes. They were so blue, unlike her own brown ones. When she was a little girl, she used to think her mother was really a fairy, not a human. Right now, she hoped there was more fairy to her; maybe that way, she’d believe the magical story.
***
Just as Lisa stopped talking, a breeze picked up, making her fold her arms around herself, although she wasn’t sure if she was cold from the wind or from her mother’s lack of response.
After what seemed like an eternity, Gladys spoke. “So, you’re saying that you travel back and forth through time, from here to college and back, and that now you’ve changed the future, but that it’s really the present? That’s what you’re trying to say?”
“Something like that.” Lisa had omitted her death. How do you tell someone they’re dead?
In a voice filled with frustration, Gladys asked, “But Lisa, while we’ve been here, living our lives, with you, where has the other you been?”
“I don’t know how it works, Mom. Maybe it’s a freak of quantum physics, or it’s this pineal gland problem I have that so far, no doctor knows what to do about or what it means. All I know is that in my time I was married to a man named Marcus, we had no children, I was Adam’s lover, and he was married to a woman named Stephanie. After going back and forth, now I’m here in the same year that I left, except that now I’m married to Adam, I have two daughters, and I’m pretty sure he’s having an affair with Stephanie. And I have no idea where Marcus is. It’s like everything got turned upside down. And Mom, one more thing….” Lisa’s voice trailed off.
“More? Isn’t that all strange enough?”
“Well, this bit is more complicated.” Lisa covered her eyes with her free hand to continue speaking. “In my real life, you’re dead.”
Gladys stayed quiet for a few minutes. Lisa shook her leg up and down, waiting for her mother to react.
“Dead, you say?”
The wind picked up again, harder this time, rustling the leaves and making ripples in the water. Lisa turned her head in the direction of children’s laughter as they fed Cheerios to the ducks and geese that congregated by them like churchgoers anxious to hear the day’s sermon. Before answering her mother’s question, Lisa swallowed hard.
“Yes. It happened long ago. That’s why it was so hard to see you again because I’ve missed you for years and years.”
“I see.”
Lisa felt her throat tighten as she herself strained to understand, and explain, the inexplicable. “And now that I’m here, you’re here too. I didn’t expect that. It wasn’t part of my thoughts. I had daydreamed that going back in time I could find Adam before he got married to another woman, but I hadn’t counted on what would happen to the other people in my life. It’s as if whatever I do affects everyone else.”
“A butterfly effect of sorts,” added Gladys. “Each movement, no matter how small, affects everything else.”
“Yes. Maybe. But now that I’m here, this isn’t what I had wanted at all. Adam is….” Lisa left off the end of the sentence.
“Adam’s what?”
“He’s not the man I thought he’d be as a husband. He’s cold, dismissive, cruel even. And I’m certain he’s having an affair with the same Stephanie that he was married to in my other life.”
Gladys rubbed her back, just like she did when Lisa was sick as a child. They sat like that for a while until Gladys spoke again.
“Well, honey, you have to admit that your story is a bit…I don’t know how to say this without upsetting you. It’s farfetched. Like the science fiction novels you liked to read when you were a teenager.”
Lisa jolted up from the bench, her eyes a mixture of glowering and disappointment. “Are you saying you don’t believe me?”
“It’s not that I don’t, sweetheart, it’s just that….” Gladys sighed. “Lisa, back and forth in time, from the present to college and then to the future. And not even a real future!”
Lisa turned to face the lake. She was angry, disappointed, almost ashamed.
With arms crossed and her feet slightly apart, Lisa stood tall, seeing nothing but the confusion of her feelings. Then a duck in the water caught her eye. This mother duck swam in front with five ducklings following in a straight line, not deviating for a second. The mother never looked back as if she trusted her ducklings to follow without question. Lisa realized this is what she wanted from her mother now, to take her word on faith even though the whole conversation seemed preposterous. Her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of a nose blowing. Lisa turned back towards the bench, disappointment still burning her.
But when she saw her mother crying quietly, her stance softened. She knew she wasn’t crazy, so she wasn’t about to waste precious time being angry.
She returned and put her arm around her mother’s shoulders. “Mom, I’m sorry. Please don’t cry.”
Gladys breathed deeply and faced Lisa. “I don’t really know what to say about the whole time traveling thing, but you know I adore you; you’re my life, and I just want to help.”
“I love you too, Mom.”
“I just don’t believe that this is happening for real, Lisa. I think you need professional help. Maybe it’s the stress of abandoning your career, raising the girls, such a big house. I don’t know. It wouldn’t surprise me that Adam behaves badly. I never really liked him, but you insisted that he’s the love of your life, so I supported you in that. But this, honey, this is more than anyone can be expected to believe.” Gladys’s voice trailed off.
Lisa bit her lower lip. “Mom, I swear. It’s true.”
Gladys took Lisa’s hands in her own. “Honey, you’re my daughter, and I love you. I will do anything I can to help you. So, let’s just agree that I’ll believe you for now. I don’t want us to have a fight.”
“Mom, please don’t patronize me.”
“I’m not doing that, dear. I’m just trying to help.”
Lisa stood up again and headed towards the lake, away from her mother. She could hear Gladys following her. “Wait, Lisa. Wait! Don’t walk away.”
Immersed in her own thoughts, Lisa heard nothing. There had to be some way to prove her story. Emily and her mother had to see she was telling the truth. This was crucial to her; it would help her figure out how to handle her problems with Adam. If she returned to the past, she’d be able to fix whatever went wrong there. She glanced behind her and stopped to let her mother catch up. As she did that, she noticed two trees in the distance, rooted farther apart from other trees, claiming their own separate space. Tall and majestic, their branches reached up, appearing to pierce the fluffy clouds that dotted the sky. The breeze blew Lisa’s hair into her face blocking her view. As she pulled her hair back, she noticed the branches of the two trees outstretched in the middle, towards one another, touching, mingling leaves, so she couldn’t tell which ones belonged to which. They swayed in unison with the wind, an ethereal dance of praise to the sun.
What if there were some way for her to bring her mother or Emily back to the past? That would show them she was telling the truth. But how could she do that when she didn’t even know how she did it herself? She didn’t even know if she could go back anymore. What if she were stuck here now?
Gladys put her hand on Lisa’s shoulder. “Lisa, please, don’t make me run after you. Let’s talk about this like people who love each other.”
Lisa reached her hand up and touched her mother’s. “Don’t worry, Mom. I’m not mad at you. I’m just analyzing how I can prove to you I’m not crazy.” They stood there for a bit, Lisa enjoying her mother’s touch.
Lisa then turned, eyes wide and filled with tears as she stared into her mother’s piercing blue eyes. She now had everything she had wanted, yet nothing was right. Maybe this was her punishment for trampling on time? Her heart ached at the thought of losing her mother again, of going back to her prior lonely life.
“Mom, in this world I have a family, I have a house, I have money.” She then whispered. “I have you.”
Gladys put the palm of her hand on her daughter’s cheek. She pulled her towards her and kissed the other cheek. “I love you sweetheart. You can always count on that.”
The cell phone buzzing in her pocket interrupted them. The number was unknown, so she sent it to voicemail, but the same caller insisted for three calls. “I’d better answer this,” she said to Gladys. “Maybe it’s the doctor or the hospital.”
“Hello?”
“Hi. Is this Lisa?”
“Yes. Who’s this?”
“Um…this is Stephanie Karch, your nurse. Remember me?”
Lisa glanced at her mother with eyebrows raised in curiosity and shock. “Of course I remember you, Stephanie. How are you?”
“I’m not doing so well, so, um, I wondered if you’d like to have a cup of coffee or something one of these days? We said we’d keep in touch.” Lisa noticed a tremor in Stephanie’s voice.
“Sure. I’d love to meet. How about lunch tomorrow, while my kids are in school?”
Lisa heard Stephanie’s soft intake of breath before she spoke. “Perfect. There’s a diner across from the hospital. Meet you there at twelve thirty?”