Chapter 17 Talk #3
“Davidson, I’m scared.”
“If you told me you wanted to wait, I’d say let’s wait. But you said you want a baby so much it hurts, Leo. And I can’t stand by seeing you unhappy just because, for some misguided reasons, you think you don’t deserve to be happy.”
“I had a dog once,” he said abruptly. He tensed with the admission, as if he was acknowledging a crime he’d committed.
“I’d wanted a puppy so much, badgered my ex about it, hoping it would bring us closer together.
Until we got one. A golden retriever. I named him Noodle.
He was so cute and so gentle. I got him into puppy training, which is more like dog owner training, you know?
Because all dogs are good, only we, people, fuck them up.
And me being me, I fucked up. I kept saying and doing the wrong things, it was obvious I didn’t have it in me, and the trainer was frustrated with me.
He said I was inconsistent, confirming bad behavior, either under- or overstimulating the pup.
Instead of trying harder, I gave up. In the end, I fucking avoided the dog.
I couldn’t bear him looking at me with those pleading eyes.
Why do goldens look so fucking needy all the time?
And you know what I did to feel better about myself?
Seduced the dog trainer, let him fuck me a few times, with Richard’s knowledge of course, and asked Richard for punishment.
Solved. No wonder the dog preferred my ex. When we broke up, Richard kept him.”
“Leo, did you like the dog?”
He looked at me, eyebrows scrunched up. “But I was bad for him.”
“The dog trainer said that? A vet? Your ex?”
“No. Nobody said that, but it was obvious.”
“Obvious, huh?” He opened his mouth, but I cut him off. “And I asked if you liked the dog.”
A rare bolt of anger flashed in his eyes. “Like anyone could have a golden puppy and not immediately fall in love with it.”
“You loved the dog, but you pushed him away because you convinced yourself you were bad for him. You could have just let yourself love him, Leo.”
He rolled his eyes, but something about that action seemed off. “I went to therapy because of that stupid dog. And it would have worked better if I hadn’t provoked my therapist until he screwed me against the door to his office.”
I squinted at him. What was he trying to do now? Manipulate me? Really?
“Leonard.” I made my voice sound as stern as ever, and he flinched. “Do you assume that if you tell me enough things about yourself that you think are horrible, I’ll change my mind about wanting to have a child with you?”
He blushed. “Is it working?”
Shaking my head at his antics, I cradled his face in my hands, kissed his forehead and leaned back, holding his anxious gaze. “Not even a little. I love you, Leo.”
He gasped and blinked as if waking up. My sudden declaration seemed to have made him mute.
“I love you,” I repeated, the truth of my words settling in my very bones. “There isn’t anything you could have done to change that. I love you, you’re my treasure, and I need to make you happy.”
More silent blinking.
“In order to make you happy, I’ll do what I know you need. I’ll love you even more. I’ll prove to you that you are just as beautiful on the inside as you are on the outside. I’ll get you pregnant, take care of you, hold you when you give birth, and we’ll raise him together.”
He swallowed, looking terrified but excited, too. “I don’t want to ruin this,” he whispered.
Brushing his mouth with my fingertips, I smiled at him. “You won’t. And do you know why?”
A small headshake, wide blue eyes pinned on me, all hopeful and pleading.
“You’re trying to do the right thing from the very first moment.
I’m so proud of you.” The praise had the desired effect.
He relaxed in my arms, his expression gentling.
“This is what we’re going to do. We keep the doctor’s appointment until the last minute.
I won’t push you or try to persuade you in any way.
If you tell me tomorrow to drive you to the doctor’s office, I’ll do it, and I’ll never hold it against you.
But please, darling, don’t punish yourself for some imagined character flaws. ”
I paused, waiting for him to acknowledge my meaning. He gave me a nod but averted his gaze.
“From now on, I’m the only one who gets to punish you.”
His eyes snapped up, his pupils widening.
“That’s right. You yourself chose me as your Master, omega.
” I pitched my voice lower, and the instant relief on Leo’s face was gorgeous to see.
He was mine, body and soul. “You’ll do as I say.
You are forbidden from punishing yourself.
From now on, when you’re unkind to yourself, when you feel guilty or unworthy, you’ll tell me.
I will decide on your punishment. Do you understand? ”
The energy between us changed. He bit his lip, his cheeks getting pink, and he said, “I understand, Master.”
It was quite possibly the most arrogant thing I’d ever said. Could I just spank and fuck some self-worth into him? Seeing him now, smiling carefully, happy with the orders he’d received…maybe I could.
I smoothed my hands down his back and shifted his light body so he straddled me. Then I cupped his ass and squeezed.
“Do you want me to breed you, mate? Get you pregnant for real?”
He gave a jerky nod. “Yes, Master. I want that so much.”
“Then we’ll do it.”
“This is insane, Davidson.” A genuine thrill shone from his eyes, irresistible. He might let himself be happy after all.
“It’s not. It’s completely natural and right.” I slapped his ass cheeks once, and his lips twitched. “I have rescheduled the meeting we have in my office to four thirty, and you still can’t be late.”
Leo chuckled. “Yes, Master.”
“Now come, I’ll show you how to make pasta.”
We cooked together, and while he complained about not knowing what to do or how, he was soon chopping carrots and peeling garlic like he wasn’t going to cut his finger off the next second. After we’d eaten, I worked for one more hour, and at four thirty-five, Leo walked into my office.
Naked, hard, wearing the steel plug, and deliberately five minutes late.
I spanked him, making the plug jostle inside him, and then I fucked the ever-loving shit out of him over my desk. He came screaming. Three times.