Chapter 5 Jatavia
Jatavia
Working overtime was just another way to avoid all of my emotions.
Yet, it still felt like I had walked through mud with weights tied to my ankles.
Tired wasn’t the word. The only light that illuminated my apartment building was a single streetlight that flickered on and off.
I clutched my purse out of instinct as I locked my car.
It had been days since the Vegas Festival. Days since my heart nearly stopped at the sight of Dreu. If I had to be honest the feel of him and his energy hadn’t left me. Everywhere I went, even keeping busy at work…I still felt him. His eyes, his presence, it pulled at me.
It felt like someone was watching me, and not in a scary way, but a familiar way.
Like the air around me felt heavier. I tried calling Devin since the festival, but he hadn’t answered.
I even texted him and told him that we needed to talk.
Just like the little boy he always proved himself to be, he ignored me.
I was ready to come clean and have the separation talk with him.
It wasn’t because of Dreu either, it was simply because we weren’t getting anywhere.
Plus, I had to stop blaming my seasonal depression on the strain that I felt in our relationship.
Even when I wasn’t depressed, Devin had me feeling some type of way about how he was as a man.
I wasn’t the type of woman who asked for much from a man…
and maybe that was the problem. I felt like if a man wanted to, they simply would without me having to ask.
I didn’t nag about wanting my hair and nails done nor did I beg him for money.
I worked hard, made my own money and when I felt like treating myself, I got my hair and nails done.
I was tired of his ass running to his mother every time we had a disagreement.
I also expected for Devin to come to his senses and offer to help with the rent and groceries since he conveniently been at my house.
I didn’t care much about him not responding to my text or answering my calls like I thought I would have been.
I think I was just overly ready to get this conversation out the way with and end things with Devin.
I pushed my thoughts of Devin and Dreu to the back of my mind and climbed the stairs to my apartment slowly.
By the time I reached my front door, a weird twist hit the bottom of my stomach, sharp like my body knew something before my mind did.
I fit my key into the lock; my heart thumped as I pushed the door open.
My apartment was literally glowing. A soft haze of warm light from a dozen candles filled the room.
The air was thick with sweet, scented candles mixed with the smell of weed drifting through the small space.
I slowly stepped inside stunned as I continued to take in my living room through clouded smoke.
Rose petals were everywhere, on the floor along with bouquets stacked in corners with the petals trailing down my narrow hallway.
Then there was expensive shopping bags lined along the walls.
Shoe boxes with designer labels scribbled on top.
My breath caught in my throat as Dreu’s tall frame emerged from the hallway.
“What the—”
“I just wanna get your attention… I really wanna be all up in your head…” His voice cracked a little as he sang Usher lowly not caring that his deep voice made it sound off key. I watched him as he watched me.
He plopped down on my couch, the same couch that Devin slept on.
He had on nothing but Versace boxer briefs.
He looked like chocolate sin wrapped in skin.
His briefs hung low on his hips showing off the cuts in his abdomen.
Tattoos covered his chest and arms, his locs hung loose past his shoulders.
He grabbed a blunt out of an ashtray that he must have brought with him like old times and re-lit the tip.
I licked my lips before closing them and just took him all the way in as he kept his brown hooded eyes on me.
“You know ya daddy’s home, it’s time to play… So you ain’t got to give my lovin’ awayyyy.” He sang, his deep voice vibrated down my spine.
The words slid out of him like warm honey and arrogance. My heart slammed against my ribs as I shifted my weight to my left leg.
“D-Dreu…what are you doing here?” I swallowed down hard nervously.
He took another pull from his blunt, and I watched his thick lips intently as they wrapped around the cigar in a way that made my legs weak.
“That’s a crazy ass question, Pancakes.” He said with a lazy smirk gracing his handsome face. “I been lookin’ for you for days. Glad I finally remembered which exact street and apartment number.” He flicked his ashes into the ashtray in front of him then sat back.
I blinked stunned as I eyed the way his muscles flexed. His eyes dragged down my body salaciously. I couldn’t move, think, and forgot how to breathe. Dreu looked like he had his mind made up. I just needed to find my strength to get his fine ass out of my apartment.
My pulse kicked into panic mode as old feelings, deep ones I buried started to rise fast. I really took him in from his bushy thick brows to his succulent full cinnamon lips, down to his moisturized legs and ashy ass feet.
All the freaky ass things we did together, while massaging and caressing each other replayed in my mind.
My thighs pressed together out of reflex. I hated that too along with the sight of him comfortable and half naked smoking and looking at me like he owned the oxygen in my apartment.
The way my body reacted was like it remembered him better than I did too.
“Look Dreu…you need to leave.” I cleared my throat, but my voice still shook.
He raised a thick brow with a look of amusement on his face.
“Need?” He questioned casually.
“Yes,” I snapped more forceful than I felt. “I have a boyfriend. Devin has a key; he could pop up here any moment. I don’t do drama.” I stated folding my arms across my heavy chest.
At the sound of Devin’s name, something in Dreu’s face changed. It was void of playfulness. It darkened. His cocky ass smirk turned into something more dangerous.
“Good,” he shrugged, “Let that nigga see—”
“Dreu, please—”
“Nah,” he leaned forward on the couch, elbows now on his knees. “Let that nigga pop up. Somebody need to show him how my woman should have been treated while I wasn’t here.” He spat.
My mouth went dry as my stomach dipped hard. I needed something to do, the cold draft behind me indicated that I forgot to shut my front door all the way. I was happy for the quick intermission; I turned and shut the door then gave Dreu my attention again.
“I’m not your woman.” I looked him right in the eyes to prove how serious I was.
His eyes flicked over me like he heard all the silent things that I refused to say out loud.
“You always been mine…you just tried real fuckin’ hard to forget that shit.” He spat out shamelessly.
I shook my head fast, because this conversation was going in the wrong direction.
“Dreu please, I’m tired and just want to go lay down. Thank you for the gifts, if you want you can take it all back since I’m not speaking your language and—”
He cut me off by reaching to the side and grabbing something off my small table beside the couch. My breath caught at the stack of white envelopes. It was my mail, my damn bills, all of them ripped open. Dreu tossed them onto the couch beside him.
“I know enough.” He cocked his head to the side.
My throat tightened as I took a step forward.
“Dreu…” I started.
He smirked again, not out of arrogance, it was more so out of certainty.
“I spent my whole morning avoiding my PR and manager… Just to break up in this bitch to see what’s really been going on. At first, I planned on a romantic evening and start ordering up all kinds of shit,” he waved his hand around to show case all of the gifts.
“But then I saw all these bills on the kitchen island. I went through every overdue notice, every final warning…every bill with your name on it.” His jaws clenched.
“I didn’t know which ones were already handled so I just paid everything.” He licked his lips.
My knees almost buckled, my eyes widened and watered at the same time.
“What do you mean everything?”
“Light bill. Water. Car note paid off, although I plan on getting you something fresher,” he licked his succulent lips. “Internet and cable. Credit cards…whatever else I saw.” He shrugged.
“Dreu—”
“Oh, and your rent,” he added smoothly. “Paid that up for the whole year.” He added.
My heart slammed so hard in my chest it hurt. He was hitting me left and right making it hard for me to think straight. All I could manage to say was.
“Why did you do that?” I whispered it like it was forbidden.
Dreu looked at me like the answer was the simplest thing in the world.
“I want you back…but first I know I gotta work to get you back. To prove it to you, that this time, I’m ready tonight, I plan on fucking you until those fake lashes are crooked.
A nigga shouldn’t be in your face, getting pussy and laying up with a key if he got you living in stress.
Worrying about disconnect notices and shit.
That nigga getting that good pussy Pancakes, and he ain’t helping you?
Fuck I look like trying to be back in your mix, I’m well off and see that you struggling.
Even if I didn’t want to pursue you, I once had you, so I’m gone off top make sure you straight. ” Dreu said in a soft tone.