11. Katie
KATIE
“Anyways, now my boss is insisting that I work late into the evenings with him until the case is concluded.”
“Can you work remotely?” I ask hopefully.
Poor Dot is venting to me over the phone about her job and her boss, the ever-infuriating William Lewis.
Truth be told, sometimes I think there’s a little more going on with her and William. Yes, he’s an uptight boss. Heavens knows I couldn’t handle working for a man like him, especially as his assistant.
“It’s like he expects me to drop everything and do whatever he needs me to do.
Never mind that I have a social life. And my photography business.
And a sleep schedule! I told him the other day, just because he only needs two hours of sleep like one of those Twilight vampires, that doesn’t mean the rest of us don’t need eight. ”
“Actually, the Twilight vampires never slept at all,” I say. “Edward didn’t even own a bed.”
“Oh, that’s right,” Dot replies distractedly. “William is Edward. Except he never moved past the jerk stage from the first movie. He’s just a…a perma-jerk!”
I hear her get into her car, the keys turning the ignition. If I know my best friend, she’s probably going to stop to get a caramel macchiato, then head into the office that William’s practice has in downtown Wild Bronco.
“Could you…quit? Find a new job?” I ask tentatively.
It’s an unspoken rule in our friendship that when one of us calls and says she needs to vent, you let her vent. You don’t suggest solutions, you just let her get it all off her chest. Solutions are stifling. We have to let the problem breathe first.
But this problem has breathed enough, hasn’t it? Dot is venting to me about her job nearly every time I see her at this point. I hate seeing my friend so unhappy.
Something has to give.
“As soon as my photography business makes enough to pay my monthly bills, I’m out of there,” she says firmly. “Problem is, William’s erratic schedule has started to impact my photography business. I had to reschedule my boudoir client that was supposed to come in today. It’s so frustrating.”
I frown.
“That’s so unfair. What did William say when you told him you’d have to reschedule your plans?”
“Oh, I didn’t tell him,” she says dismissively.
“I don’t talk to him about the photography business.
He’d probably think it was stupid. You know, chubby chick taking photographs of other chubby chicks in their underwear.
Guys like William love to make fun of things like that. He wouldn’t get it at all.”
I bite my lip. I’m not sure I agree with Dot’s assessment of William. I don’t know him well, and I understand that he’s a big old grouch. But he’s never been a bully.
“Anyway,” Dot sighs. “I’m sorry. I’m taking up all the space in this conversation. We haven’t even talked about you. How are you? What are you up to today?”
Feeling guilty as hell for not telling you about me and your brother, that’s what.
“Just cleaning up around the house,” I say. “You know, Sunday reset.”
The door of my apartment opens. Darren enters, a couple of bags in his hands.
“Hey, I’m back,” he calls loudly before he notices me in the kitchen on the phone.
“Who’s that?” Dot asks. “Sounds like my brother.”
“It is,” I say quickly. “He came by to work on the building.”
“Well, give him my hello,” she says. “Tell him he better be a nice landlord to you or his sister will kick his butt.”
I hear her car slow down and then the sound of a drive through speaker. “ Welcome to Fiction and Foam. Can I take your order?”
“I’ll talk to you later,” I say in a rush.
“See ya.”
Darren enters the kitchen. I wait by the counter with a smile, expecting him to come grab me the way he had before he left. Instead he goes to the sink, unpacking the stuff he got from the hardware store and laying it on the floor beside his toolbox.
Okay. That’s fine. He’s focused on fixing the sink.
No need to get insecure and weird about it, Katie.
Except I am. Damn.
“So how was the store?” I ask him lamely.
“Fine.”
He doesn’t look at me, laying down on the floor and looking beneath the sink. I can’t even see his face now, just his torso and lower body. His muscular arms flex as he turns a screwdriver.
Even while anxious, I think I could watch him fix things all day. Something about this man when he’s holding tools just does things to me.
“Did you go anywhere else while you were out?” It’s the next question I can think of that isn’t “Are we okay? Why does it feel like the entire vibe has shifted? What’s going on?”
I know I shouldn’t freak out but then again this is the same guy who kissed me and then stood me up the next day without any explanation.
He was my first kiss.
Now he’s my first everything .
“Are you hungry?” I ask him. “I could make us some toast.”
“I’m okay for now.”
Okay, what the hell?
It’s like all connection has died since he returned from the store and I don’t know why. I stiffen, then blurt out the first thing that comes to mind.
“Darren Daniel Baker, if you do not get out from beneath that sink right now and look me in the eye while you speak to me, I’m going to kick you out of your own building.”
The hand holding the screwdriver freezes, then slowly puts it down in the toolbox. I watch Darren’s large body slide out from beneath the sink and slowly stand upright.
My arms are crossed over my chest, giving myself a hug. I have to hold myself together, because I’ve already fallen apart over Darren once.
If I do it again, there will be no recovery. No third chance. Just a lot of rocky road ice cream and Gilmore Girls rewatching marathons as I try to stitch my heart back together and look for a new place to live at the same time.
“What’s going on, firecracker?”
His voice is etched with equal parts concern and bewilderment. The use of my nickname softens me. You’re an insecure nut, Katie. And he’s realizing it.
“Last night you had your tongue inside of me, and today you came back from the store and will hardly look at me,” I say, looking down. “So you tell me what’s going on.”
“Nothing is going on,” he says.
“Are you lying?” I ask him.
“No!”
He looks genuinely insulted by the accusation.
“Okay, so you’re not lying ,” I say. “But…what’s going on? It’s like your energy totally changed since you returned from the store. Did something happen? Are you having second thoughts about us?”
“Hell no! Are you crazy?”
“If I am, it’s because you make me that way. You’re the one who left first, remember? You kissed me and promised you’d be there and you weren’t.”
He shakes his head.
“I know, baby. I know I fucked up. I’m not that guy anymore, and I’ve meant every damn word I’ve said to you. I love you, Katie. I don’t want to lose you. Tell me what’s wrong. What do I need to do to fix this? Tell me and I’ll do it.”
He reaches for me, grabbing me by the belt loops of my jeans and pulling me to him.
The tension in my shoulders melts. Just a little.
“You can’t switch up your energy like this,” I tell him. “You can’t be hot and cold. Or even hot and lukewarm. Not for a long time. Because I’m still scared this is all a dream. Any second now I’m going to wake up alone in my bed and you’ll be the same old grouchy landlord who tore down my bridge.”
“I’m not going anywhere,” he vows. “And I’m going to rebuild that bridge. Just like I’m going to rebuild what I broke between us. I know I’ve acted weird since I got back from the store…I’m not good at keeping secrets, okay?”
“Why would you be keeping a secret?” The tension in my body returns.
“It’s a good secret,” he says. “I’m still not good at keeping things from people, though.”
“This is killing me, Darren.”
“You know I love you?” he continues. “I’ve loved you since the day I saw you, before I even understood how I felt. I was just a boy then and you were my kid sister’s funny little friend always staying over at our house.”
“I know.”
“But I loved you, Katie. I didn’t get it back then.
Then we grew up together and I kissed you on your birthday.
When my lips touched yours, I had a vision of all that we could be.
And it scared the shit out of me because I’d seen my own family fracture at the hands of my father’s mistakes.
And I thought, if that’s the best my father can do, how am I supposed to believe I can do better? Maybe I’ll ruin your life.”
“You wouldn’t do that, Darren.”
“You’re right,” he growls. “I wouldn’t. I know better. I’m the man you need. I’ll protect you and cherish you for the rest of my life if you let me. And that’s why I can hardly look at you, Katie. Because I’ve made up my mind and once I make up my mind about something, I want to take action.”
“By avoiding talking to me?” I ask humorously.
“By doing this.”
He pulls a small box from his pocket and immediately I know what it is. Funnily enough, I’ve never actually seen a ring box in real life. But I’ve watched enough rom coms and Christmas jewelry commercials to recognize it when I see it. It looks comically small in Darren’s oversized hand.
Darren kneels before me.
If this is a dream, it’s the cruelest dream my brain has ever conjured.
“Katie, darlin, firecracker,” he says. “You’ve been my lifelong obsession.
My muse in all that I do. My inspiration, the thing that keeps me going.
You make me want to be a better man. I want to spend the rest of my life with you.
I want to make your life easier. I want to dry your tears and be the reason you smile.
I want to have a family with you, grow old with you, everything.
From the bottom of my heart, you would make me the luckiest man alive if you said yes. ”
“YES!”
If the store were open today then all of my customers would’ve just heard the loudest, most joyful scream ever.