Chapter 12
Ego
Tonight was the first time in the last week that Lysandro came over and slit his wrist in front of me, draining his blood into a cup from the cupboard for me to drink from. It had been good to see him, but even better to get my elixir freshly from the source.
I’d braced myself for his endless lecturing when he sat down and made himself comfortable, but instead, we talked about Dead Air.
In the time since he’d last been here, he’d gone to my channel and watched every video.
He even had a favorite, which gave me an unexpected boost of pleasure, like a favorite teacher praising my last essay.
When he caught me darting glances at the front hall, he assured me that Scotty wouldn’t be joining us this evening like it was a good thing. Considering all he did was gripe and harp on me for not talking to Sky, you’d think I’d be happy about his absence, but…I wasn’t.
I wasn’t sure Scotty actually liked me any more than he had previously, but I found his presence soothing in a way that I didn’t with Delaney or Lysandro.
Which was honestly more surprising with Delaney than Lysandro.
She was my manager, assistant, and friend.
She’d been by my side since the beginning of my career.
Maybe Scotty’s presence was like a balm because he was currently my only link and connection to my cousin.
Sky’s text messages and attempts to video message had ramped up lately.
I kept sending him brief check-ins that all was well, but his concern was on a knife’s edge between sheer panic and anger.
I just…I wasn’t ready. Once he knew, this—my new life—would all be real in a way I’d no longer be able to deny.
After Lysandro left, I went through my nightly routine of pulling my amp and guitar from the closet I was storing them in, then set up the tripod and phone, ready to record my latest Dead Air song.
The desperately despondent place these songs were coming from required no preparation, no scribbling on random pieces of paper while the song lyrics composed themselves, no fiddling around on my guitar trying to find the right chords. The minute I sat down, they were just there.
If I had it in me to work on my next Ego album—if I even thought there would be another—this process would be epic, but alas…the popstar known as Ego was dead, leaving a husk of a man?—vampire?—in its place.
As I settled in, ready to record, I heard the familiar thump, thump, thump of Scotty’s heartbeat from outside. With no more than a thought, I moved to the window and stared out into the darkness. No Scotty, no car, just nothingness. Great. Now my imagination was conjuring the younger man.
Shoving down my disappointment, I let go of the heavy drape, letting it fall, only to hear the thump echoing with the sounds of a vehicle.
Spinning, I looked again, peering past the darkness, beyond the corpse of trees, until I saw it.
Scotty was coming down the hidden side road that led to my prison.
As much as I didn’t want him to catch me watching for him out the window, I couldn’t move. How had I heard his heartbeat from so far away? For that matter, how had I heard his car or been able to peer through the slivers of space between trees and bushes to see him out there moving toward me?
That had never happened before, and I spent each night waiting for him to bring me Lysandro’s blood in such anxious anticipation that I focused on hearing his arrival. As usual, he used the keypad to gain entrance into the house.
“What are you doing here?” I whispered as soon as he was close enough.
“What? Were you hoping you got rid of me?” he teased, going straight to the couch and dropping into my space.
“No.” Turning, I gulped at how loudly the beat of his heart had grown, at the volume that his blood hummed, calling to me. Scared by my visceral reaction to him, I clasped the amulet, ensuring it was still there, but also drawing strength from it. “It’s just…” I gulped again. “So late.”
“Or early, depending on how you look at it.” He grinned. “I actually took a nap and set my alarm so that we could talk.”
Warily, I sat in his normal wingback. “Talk about what?”
“Lysandro texted me that you two had a nice visit.”
My spine stiffened as my mind went on high alert. His innocuous statement felt like a trap, and I was the hunted. “We did. We talked about Dead Air.”
His mouth tilted up on one side in a half-grin. “That’s nice.” He leaned forward, dropping his clasped hands between his spread legs. “And now I’m here to talk about everything else. Enough is enough, Ego. It’s time.”
My confusion of the last few minutes fell away instantly, and I scowled. “Time for what?” I bit out.
He huffed in exasperation. “For you to stop being a baby and tell everyone that you’re home and what’s happened. This has gone on too long.”
“No. Lysandro said the other night that I needed more control first, remember?” And given the rushing of Scotty’s blood was sounding like a siren’s song that I had to fight to resist, I didn’t think he was wrong.
“It’s hard enough just having you here. I can’t even imagine…
” I licked my lips and turned away. “No. Final answer.”
“Sorry. That’s unacceptable.”
Fire blazed through me, and I whirled on him. “It’s not your decision.”
“No, it’s not,” he said calmly. “And you don’t need any more choices stolen from you, but this path you’re taking is wrong. It’s not good for you, and it’s not fair to Skylar. I’m sick of lying to my friend for you.”
I stalked toward him. It scared me, this intense anger I felt toward him.
He should’ve been scared of me, but instead he stood there bravely, like I was nothing more than the mere mortal I’d been before.
Another hunger flickered to life inside of me.
Not of the hunger for blood I’d had earlier, but something hotter, something that felt a lot more like desire.
I pointed at him. “It’s your own fault you’re having to keep this secret. No one invited you here. You came on your own accord.” I jabbed the air in emphasis, controlling myself just enough not to pick him up and shake him like a ragdoll. “So why don’t you fuck off and mind your own business.”
Huffing, he stood up. Satisfaction crossed his face, confusing me. “You’re on a roll tonight.”
My eyes narrowed. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
He took a step toward me. “It means you’re wrong for the second time.
” I took a step back, wanting to keep some space between us.
What was he thinking? “You are going to tell Sky you’re here.
” As he moved farther into my personal bubble, I tripped backward in my haste to keep him safe. “And I’m not going anywhere.”
“Ahh!” I roared in rage. What was this game he was playing at? I was the threat. “You need to listen to me.”
“No,” he said firmly. “I’m done just listening to you.”
“Scotty, stay away from me. You don’t understand.
” I clutched desperately at the amulet around my neck.
All of my senses were misfiring. The thump of his heart and the woosh of his blood, that smell of cedar, baked bread, and old books, the calm, confidence with which he approached me were all driving me mad. Waking my body up in a dangerous way.
“What? What don’t I understand? That you’re pissed about what was done to you. That you’re vulnerable and afraid. That you’re terrified of what your future will look like.” He took another step forward. “I get all of that, Ego. I do.”
I shook my head rapidly. “No. I don’t have any control.
Lysandro told you to be wary around me. I…
you can’t get in my space like this when I’m angry.
It’s not safe.” But it wasn’t anger. It was a desire unlike any I’d ever felt before.
So thick that I tasted it on my tongue. My dick, hard as nails, throbbed in my pants to the rhythm of Scotty’s heartbeat.
He smirked at me. “You don’t look angry. You look…” He raked his eyes down my body, and I saw the same telling bulge in the front of his dark gray sweats that I felt in my own. He licked his lips. “I think you’re hungry, Ego.”