Chapter Ten – Avery
Chapter Ten
AVERY
My parents were talking to Bradly and Mackenzie in the kitchen while Bradly ate spoonfuls of the fruit dip that Beck hadn’t had a chance to taste yet.
“Grams is going to kick your ass when she sees you eating that.”
Bradly jumped, covered his heart with his hand, and said, “You scared me! I thought you were her.”
“She’s right behind me, so if you value your fingers, you better put that away.”
Mackenzie giggled.
“Stella talked Beck into staying here, and for some reason, she suggested I go with him back to his hotel to help him pack his things.” Knowing my father would quickly object, I looked at my brother. “Did you want to go with us?”
Bradly frowned. “Not really.”
“Bradly,” Mackenzie and Mom said at the same time.
“What? She asked if I wanted to go, and I don’t. I’d like to get home, snuggle up with Kenzie, and watch a movie.”
My father folded his arms over his chest and glared at my brother.
“Dad, nothing is going to happen. Is it, Avery?”
“No, but even if it did, I’m an adult.”
Bradly screwed up his face. “Oh, wrong response.”
“That’s enough,” Mom said. “Avery, is Beck going to drop you off before heading back to the ranch?”
I nodded. “That’s the plan. He’s still talking to the uncles.”
“How did it go, by the way?” Dad asked.
“Really well. I think Uncle Brock, Ty, and Tanner are still in a bit of shock.”
The rest of the gang started making their way into the kitchen. Lincoln hugged Merit, and they promptly started whispering about something. I was curious, but the moment I saw Beck walk in, deep in conversation with Tanner, I was instantly distracted. I tried not to react. My heart, on the other hand, started to pound in my chest. I casually looked past him to Grams. She seemed to be happy, but there was sadness in her eyes as well.
“Grams looks sad,” I softly said to my father.
He placed his hand on my shoulder. “I’m sure she’s feeling a deluge of emotions right now.”
Turning to him, I asked quietly, “Dad, you’re not really worried about Beck and me, are you?”
His brows drew down a bit, but he said, “No, I’m not. I think you’re a friend that he needs right now.”
Ignoring the way that made my chest squeeze, I nodded.
“I guess I should head on to the hotel so I don’t get back here too late,” Beck said, glancing at Grams and Grandpa.
“Avery, you’re still driving with Beck, right?” Stella asked.
“Yes, I’ll make sure he gets there okay.”
“Does his phone not have GPS?” Dad asked. I wasn’t sure if Beck heard him. If he did, he chose to ignore the comment. He was walking away with Uncle Ty.
Glancing back at my father, I stuck out my tongue at him, and he laughed.
Stella joined us. “The reason I suggested Avery go with him is because it seems like they’ve become friends. I’m sure Beck is feeling overwhelmed, and it will be nice for him to have someone to talk to.”
I forced myself to smile. I wasn’t sure why her words hurt like they did.
Mom took my hand and pulled me to her. “If it starts to snow, maybe you should drive.”
I smiled and hugged her. “I promise if it snows, I will. I’ll text you when we get to his hotel and when we leave.”
The drive to Beck’s hotel was mostly a silent one. I knew his mind had to be churning, so I left him to his thoughts. When he was ready to talk, he would.
We pulled up to the Bitterroot Inn, and he put the SUV in Park and sat there for a moment, simply staring out the front window.
“Beck? Is everything okay?” I asked.
He didn’t respond until I said his name again.
“Beck?”
Looking at me, he almost started, as if he’d forgotten I was even in the car. He smiled. “Yeah, everything’s okay. It’s just…a lot.”
I nodded. “You don’t have to stay at Grams and Grandpa’s house, you know. You can stay here. I can call an Uber and—”
“No, it’s not that. I want to stay there. I’d like to get to know them better, and try to find out more about my father.”
“Okay.”
His eyes met mine, and for a moment we just sat there, neither of us speaking or moving. Finally, he shook his head slightly and said, “Hold on, I’ll get your door.”
I dug my teeth into my lower lip. Growing up, I’d always seen my father and uncles open car doors for my mother and aunts, and had always considered it such a sweet thing to do. Guys my age didn’t do that.
My age. I sighed. Was a nine-year difference really that big of a deal? I didn’t think so. Would Beck think it was?
The door opened, and Beck reached his hand out for me to take it. I did, and tried not to react to the way a bolt of electricity raced from his touch through the rest of my body. He hadn’t even flinched, so clearly the touch hadn’t affected him any.
Smiling politely, I murmured, “Thank you.”
We headed into the hotel and straight to the elevator. Beck hit his floor number and motioned for me to go in first when the doors opened. I followed him out of the elevator and down the hall to his room. He unlocked the door, and we walked in. I glanced into the bathroom to see he only had a few things on the counter. His suitcase was sitting on a chair, and the bed was made up, the room cleaned by housekeeping.
“Wasn’t here long enough to really mess anything up,” Beck said with a slight laugh.
“What can I do to help?” I asked, looking around the room.
Beck shrugged as he put his computer in a backpack. “Would you mind getting the stuff out of the bathroom for me? It’s just a few things.”
“Not at all,” I replied, turning and making my way into the bathroom. Upon closer inspection, I couldn’t help but smile. Beck was very organized.
His toothbrush was already stored in the travel case. I reached for the bottle of cologne, removed the cap, and sniffed. Fruity, spicy, and just a touch woodsy, it had hints of bergamot and citrus. Frowning, I sniffed again. Rosemary, nutmeg…and was that apple—
“Like the smell?”
I let out a small scream and jumped. “Jesus, Beck! You scared me.”
When I turned around, he was leaning against the door frame, and goodness, was he handsome. His dimple was on full display. It was almost sinful how good-looking this guy was.
“So?”
Confused, I shook my head and asked, “So what?”
He smiled, and I tried to ignore the way it sent a warm feeling through my lower belly. “Do you like the smell of my cologne?”
Clearing my throat, I put the cap back on. “I do. It has a woodsy smell, but at the same time, it’s spicy and fruity. I can smell apples, nutmeg, some bergamot, and…”
My voice trailed off as I looked up and saw his brows raised.
I laughed lightly. “I learned a lot about fragrances when I was in France.” I looked away, a little embarrassed. “Sorry, I was just curious what it smelled like. I haven’t really smelled cologne on you, so… Anyway, just put everything in this bag?” I asked, pointing to a small black bag sitting on the counter.
“I like it when you blush, Avery.”
Snapping my gaze up to meet his, I had to force myself to take a breath. “You do?”
He nodded.
When his eyes moved to my mouth, I licked my suddenly dry lips. A small growl sound came from the back of his throat. He pushed off the door frame and slowly made his way over to me. His eyes were still on my mouth, and I nervously chewed on my lower lip.
“It lights up your face.”
“What does?” I asked, surprised by how breathy my voice sounded.
He grinned, and I took a half step back to lean against the counter. Otherwise, I was pretty sure my legs were about to give out on me.
“When you blush.”
With a nervous chuckle, I turned slightly and put the glass bottle on the counter. “I’ve never heard of someone’s blush making their face light up.”
He was so close to me, I could hear his breaths—and he was breathing heavier. “Maybe it’s because you’re so incredibly beautiful that it simply enhances your beauty.”
I straightened and looked up at him. He was so tall. Easily six feet to my five-five. “You think I’m beautiful?” I asked.
Beck nodded, and his eyes searched my face before they landed back on my mouth.
Kiss me already!
“Thank you,” I whispered as I lifted onto my toes, trying to get closer to those soft-looking lips. I’d dreamed about what they would feel like last night, and this was pure torture.
“Avery,” he said in a low, pained voice.
My hands settled on his chest. “Beck.”
The next thing I knew, he had his hands on my waist, lifting me up onto the counter.
“We can’t do this.”
I raised a brow. “Do what?”
He opened his mouth to say something, but nothing came out.
I spread my legs wider and hooked them around his thighs, drawing him closer. For a moment, I thought he was going to take a step back. But when I sucked my lower lip in, he growled…and lowered his mouth to mine.
Beck kissed me like he’d been wanting to do this from the moment we met. I opened instantly to him, and we both moaned as our tongues danced together. I’d been kissed plenty of times, but this was different. It was soft, yet rough. Wet and hot, and the hint of whiskey on his tongue left me feeling intoxicated. If I’d been standing, I would have sagged against his body.
My fingers slipped into his soft hair, and I couldn’t help myself; I tugged, causing Beck to pull my body closer to his. I gasped as I felt his hardness between my legs. His hands moved over my body in the gentlest of ways, but everywhere he touched felt on fire. My entire body was winding up tighter and tighter.
Beck pulled his mouth from mine and moved his lips along my jaw, causing me to drop my head back and moan in delight. His tongue moved over my throat, and my entire body trembled in response. My hands moved to his back, and I slipped them under his shirt.
“Beck, yes… I need more.”
He suddenly stilled, then gently put his hands on my shoulders and shook his head. My legs unwrapped from around him as he took a few steps away.
His chest rose and fell with heavy breaths, and I clasped my hands to the counter to hold myself straight as I drew in deep lungfuls of air.
“What’s…what’s wrong?” I asked between breaths.
Beck shook his head and ran a hand over his face. “That was a mistake.”
My stomach fell. “What?”
He turned away from me and appeared to be trying to regain control. I slipped off the counter and tried to ignore the throbbing between my legs.
Beck finally turned and faced me. “I lost control for a moment. I’m sorry.”
My eyes went wide. “I’m not sorry. Not in the least bit.”
His eyes held an emotion I couldn’t put my finger on. He stayed silent for a moment, and right before I was about to ask him what in the hell was wrong with him, he spoke.
“That can never happen again, Avery.”
“The kiss?”
“All of it. My hands on your body, my mouth…” He closed his eyes and wore a pained expression on his face.
My anger was slowly growing. “I don’t understand, Beck. Why can it never happen again?”
He ignored me and started to put his items into the bag, then quickly left the bathroom. My fingers touched my still-swollen lips, and I closed my eyes. That had been the most intense kiss of my life, and if he thought I was going to let it go, he was insane.
I walked into the room to see him closing his suitcase.
“Beck, I’m really confused. I thought there was something between us.”
He paused for a moment. “There is. Friendship, that’s all.”
I let out a bitter laugh. “I don’t know how they do things in Texas, but I’ve never kissed a friend that way, or felt their hard dick pressed against my stomach.”
Straightening, he turned and faced me. “It was a mistake. A moment of losing control, that’s all. It’s been an emotional day. It won’t happen again.”
My arms folded over my chest. “Does this have to do with my father?”
“Partly, and you’re too young.”
Dropping my arms to my sides, I balled my fists. “I’m too young? I’m eighteen years old.”
“And I’m twenty-seven, Avery.”
“So what? I lost my virginity to a guy who was seven years older than me. He didn’t seem to have a problem with it.”
A look of outrage passed over his face. “How old were you?”
I took a step back in shock. “Why do you care?”
“Did he pressure you?”
A disbelieving laugh slipped free. “What are you, my father now?”
He closed his eyes and appeared to be trying to calm down. Why in the world would he care about when I’d lost my virginity?
Slowly, he sat down on the bed. He looked up at me and took a deep breath. “Did you want to be with him?”
My brows drew down. “Of course I did, Beck. He didn’t force me.”
“Did you love him?”
Tilting my head, I pulled the desk chair out and sat down. “No, I didn’t love him. We dated for a while, I liked him a lot, and we discussed it. He wanted me to be sure, because he thought I should wait for someone I loved.”
“How old were you?”
“Seventeen. He was twenty-four and lived in the same building as me. He worked for a publisher in France and was my best friend Juliette’s brother. I trusted him.”
Beck swallowed hard, then nodded. He stood, got his suitcase, put his backpack over his shoulder, and said, “I better get you home so I don’t get to Stella and Ty’s too late.”
I got up and pushed the chair back. “So we’re going to what, just pretend that didn’t happen?”
His eyes met mine. “Yes. I’m sorry, Avery. I’m way too emotional tonight, and I shouldn’t have done that with you. It was a mistake, and I regret it.”
My body jerked as if he’d just slapped me. A coldness spread through my chest and felt like it wrapped around my heart. All I could do was nod. I knew he was waiting for me to walk out first, so I turned on my heels and headed toward the door.
Without a word, I walked out of the hotel room and toward the elevator, not waiting for Beck. I knew I was being childish, but his words had hurt—intentionally, if I had to guess—and I was trying not to let the fact that I was near tears show in any way.
I hit the down button and pulled out my phone. I pulled up my best friend Lacey’s number and sent her a text.
Me: Hey! I’m finally home. What are your plans for tomorrow night?
The doors opened, and I walked in first, turning and facing forward as Beck stood next to me. My phone went off with a text.
Lacey: Oh my gosh, I’m so excited you’re home! The Blue Moose is allowing eighteen and older in tomorrow night. We were all planning on going. Come with us!
Glancing over to Beck, I noticed he was looking at his phone as well. I tilted my head to see the name Kelsey on the text. I focused back on my own phone.
Me: Count me in. I’ll call you tomorrow.
The doors opened, and Beck waited for me to exit first.
“I need to let them know I’m keeping the room but won’t need any service for a few days,” Beck softly said as I kept walking.
“I’ll wait for you in the rental.”
He didn’t say anything, and I bolted as fast as I could to get outside. Once I was around the corner, I drew in a deep breath and closed my eyes.
“Stupid idiot,” I whispered, wiping the one tear that managed to get free. “How could I even think he would be attracted to me?”
I sat in the car and replayed the last couple of days I’d spent with Beck. On the plane, he was for sure giving me vibes that he was attracted to me, and more than once, he’s done it here in Hamilton.
Sighing, I dropped my head back against the seat and waited.
It didn’t take long before Beck was walking out to his rental car. He put his suitcase and backpack in the back seat first before getting into the driver’s seat.
“Avery—” he started, but I cut him off.
“It’s okay, Beck. We don’t have to talk about it again. I misread the signals, and you’ve made it perfectly clear you’re not interested.”
“I didn’t…” Whatever he was going to say, he let it drift away on a sigh.
“We need to get going before it gets too late. I’m meeting some friends tonight to go out,” I lied.
I felt his eyes on me, but I kept my focus on the blackness through the passenger window.
He started the car and entered the directions for my parents’ ranch. I knew that if I didn’t get over this childish behavior, it would impact our friendship, and I truly didn’t want that to happen.
Glancing at him, I noticed he was gripping the steering wheel tightly, and his jaw seemed to be locked shut tight. “Can we just forget this part of the night ever happened and go back to being friends?”
He looked at me quickly before focusing on the road. “I would like that. You seem to be the only friend I have.”
Smiling, I said, “You’ll soon be surrounded by family and won’t feel so…alone. If that’s how you’re feeling. I won’t pretend to know what you’re going through.”
Beck shrugged. “To be honest, I’m not sure what I’m feeling right now.”
“Fair enough.” I clasped my hands together in my lap because I had no idea what to do with them. “It sounds like you’ll be busy tomorrow. I’ve got a lot of things to do as well, what with being home after being gone for so long.”
“I’m sorry I’ve taken up so much of you and your family’s time.”
“Nonsense. My father and mother were more than happy to help connect you with the Shaws. I know you’re going to love them all.” I shook my head. “They’re hard not to love.”
He smiled. “They’re funny. At least the three brothers are.”
“They are, and the rest of the family is the same way.”
We drove for a few minutes in silence.
“So, when is this family game night that I need to avoid?”
I screwed up my face. “Well, with you staying with Grams and Grandpa, I’m not sure you’ll be able to miss it. I know it’s getting harder to arrange, as the grandkids all start getting married and having kids of their own. My mom said they’re no longer doing it once a week, but once a month now.”
“Once a week?” he asked, surprised.
With a giggle, I replied, “Yes. They used to do it once a week. And they are hardcore when it comes to family game night. Nothing is off limits, it seems like.”
“I’m glad I got the warning. You don’t know what night it is?”
I chewed on my lower lip. I did know, but evilly, I decided not to tell him. “I’m not sure if they’ve already had it this month or not.”
He nodded. “I’ll be on the lookout for it.”
Beck pulled down the drive to our ranch and typed in the gate code I’d told him yesterday. The gate opened, and we started down the drive. I wasn’t sure if it was my imagination or not, but he seemed to be driving rather slowly.
“Is it this way?” he asked, pointing to the right.
“Yes. If you go the other way, it’ll take you toward my mother’s house, where she grew up. But from our house, you can go down a drive that takes you to the main barn on the you-pick farm side. There’s a barn and a huge greenhouse. Mackenzie works there. That’s how she and Bradly met. On Christmas evening, he saw the lights on in the barn and went to investigate. Found Mackenzie in there, singing and dancing with her cat and pet goat.”
Beck laughed. “Pet goat?”
“Yes! Pickles. He’s a sweetheart. You’ll have to meet him. Mackenzie dresses him up. He’s adorable.”
“We have goats on our ranch back in Texas.”
“Really? Any pets?” I asked.
“Um,” he said, “Not personal pets, but I guess all the animals on the ranch are our pets in some way or another.”
I tilted my head as I studied him. “You’re an animal lover, aren’t you?”
He gave me a knowing grin. “I am, indeed. More like a sucker for animals. Not much I wouldn’t do for them.”
“That’s a good thing. Shows you’re a sensitive guy.”
“If you say so.”
Beck pulled up to my house, parked, and shut off the car. “I’ll walk you in.”
“You don’t have to do that,” I said as I reached into the back seat for my coat.
“I know I don’t have to. I want to. Wait there.”
Holding onto my coat, I watched as Beck jogged around the front of the SUV and opened the passenger door. He held out his hand, and I took it, wishing his touch didn’t send a rush of warmth through my entire body. Ignoring it, I quickly pulled my hand from his and started for the porch. Beck followed, and my father opened the front door. He and my mom greeted us with bright smiles.
“Will you remember how to get to Stella and Ty’s place?” my dad asked.
Beck rubbed the back of his neck. “I think so. I might have to have Ty meet me at the gate and follow him in.”
My father laughed. “Probably a good idea. You have their numbers, right?”
“Yeah, they gave them to me.”
A part of me wanted to offer to grab an overnight bag and go with him, but I knew there was no way I could be under the same roof as Beck, not after the rejection from earlier. I wouldn’t be able to sleep at all.
Beck took a couple of steps away from the door. “Thank you for arranging the dinner this evening. I’m not sure I could have done this without your help.”
Dad waved him off. “It was worth it to see how happy the family was. I’m sure they’ll have you busy for the next few days, but you’re more than welcome to come over for family dinner night.”
“Yes! Do come over,” Mom insisted. “This week it’s on Wednesday. Well, it’s pretty much always on Wednesdays.”
Beck looked my way, and I forced myself to keep a relaxed and neutral expression. He glanced back to my parents. “Thank you, I’d love that.”
“Wonderful! Then plan on being here Wednesday at six.”
Beck gave a nod. “Wednesday at six.”
My mother pulled my father into the house, but they left the door open. I jerked my thumb toward it. “Better get inside. Good luck tomorrow. I’m sure everything will be fine.”
I wasn’t sure if I was saying that to myself or to Beck.
“Yeah, of course. I’ll, um, talk to you later?”
Nodding my head, I stepped into the house and glanced back over my shoulder. “Yeah. Talk to you later.”