9. Chapter 9
Chapter nine
Alex
February 21st, almost two years to the day since Cairo. The day when Alex and Wynn’s lives changed forever.
The memories of when shit hit the fan in Egypt still haunted Alex, and he continued to have nightmares about the events. Cairo was the event that triggered Alex’s panic attacks. He deeply regretted what happened, but was too ashamed to admit it and face Wynn. However, Alex needed to know about Wynn’s connection to PGC, despite his regret and shame. He’d never have the courage to face him otherwise. Alex hoped meeting in a neutral location over a drink would help defuse the situation.
Cathedral Station had always been his favorite gay bar in Boston to drink and play billiards. Alex always thought he could have any guy in the bar he wanted––the ignorance of youth. Those days stopped when he met Danyal. Adding to his frustration, Alex could taste the beer, but alcohol no longer affected him since his transcendence. Against his will, he’d become one of the hipster gays who drank alcohol-free beer for the taste. Among the many “gifts” Ditta had bestowed upon him, this one seemed particularly cruel.
Seeing Galen sitting in the corner in his rugby jersey and jeans, sipping his beer, amused Alex. Seeing the swarm of muscle-bear hunters circling Galen offered thrilling entertainment, and a much-needed distraction. Perhaps Alex shouldn’t have chosen Bear Night to expose Galen to his first gay bar.
Alex’s amusement was interrupted by the man standing uncomfortably close to him at the bar. He could feel the man’s hot breath on his neck. Alex turned to greet his guest.
“Thank you for joining me, Wynn. I didn’t know whether you would. Would you like a drink? Guinness, if memory serves.”
“No, I’ve no intention of staying long enough,” said Wynn sharply.
“Suit yourself. Well, I have several questions––starting with your involvement with Palingenesis.”
“Same old Alex, always right to the chase. No foreplay. Remember that black and white stray pup you found on the streets of Cairo? What did you name him?”
“Horus. How does that relate to my question, Wynn?”
Wynn said he was astonished Alex recalled the pup’s name. He was all skin and bone. Horus was the runt even his mother didn’t want—barely a few breaths from death. But Alex heard his screams from the garbage can along the streets where Horus was cowering. Wynn said Alex swooped in to save him, wrapped him in his Michael Kors jacket, and revived him.
“You nourished him, loved him, and protected him,” Wynn said. “Watching you play with that puppy and care for him for the month we were there was perhaps the most human emotion I ever observed in you. Then what? You packed your Gucci bags and left Horus at the hotel. You didn’t try to find him a shelter; you never tried to go through the official process to bring him back to the States, or find someone to care for him. He was a heartbroken puppy the cruel world had abandoned for a second time, and you left him alone at the hotel with nothing, not even food or water. Have you ever wondered what happened to that poor, forsaken puppy? Does it keep you up at night?”
“I remember it all vividly, Wynn. I don’t need a recap,” said Alex, noting that time obviously hadn’t dissipated Wynn’s anger.
“You see, the difference between us, Alex, is I cared enough to know what happened to Horus. The hotel threw him out as soon as they found him. He kept whining and howling about your betrayal. He was mistreated by the staff until, one day, he returned to the garbage can where he’d come from. He’d experienced love, happiness, and pleasure, but everything was taken from him by the person he loved most, and needed most to protect him.”
“Look, Wynn, I know you’re angry at me, and we didn’t end on good terms…”
“Memories are funny things, Alex. You make it sound like there was a choice in how things ended. When the hotel security found us in bed together, you ran and never stopped, fleeing in fear of what a homophobic country would do to two gay men caught in the act.” To add insult to injury, the contraband Klonopin Alex brought into the country was included in Wynn’s arrest. “Did you try to contact the U.S. consulate when I was in custody? Did you try to get me an attorney to provide legal assistance? Did you even care about the violence I endured in an Egyptian prison as a faggot and American drug dealer? The months we spent together were nothing more than another notch on the bedpost for Alex Lieth. A story to tell your friends, if you had any, about the time you seduced your former professor and mentor.”
“Wynn, I tried and did my best,” said Alex. “I contacted Ditta, and she promised to help you. What more could I do? I was a twenty-three-year-old kid on the run from the homophobic police in a foreign country. I snuck out of the country in a crate, fearing every moment for days that I would be discovered. I still have nightmares and panic attacks about what happened.”
“Well, bless your fucking heart. Always painting yourself as the victim,” said Wynn.
Alex could feel his blood pressure rising as his face flushed, his heart began to race, and his breathing became shallower. The building, stabbing pain in his temples couldn’t be ignored.
“It all goes back to your same character flaw,” said Wynn. “You abandon and destroy everything around you that loves you, and discard them like trash. Horus and I were collateral damage in Hurricane Alex. Look at your life. The pattern is well-established. How is Shae? The thing about best friends is most people care about them and value them. When was the last time you reached out to him? Ignoring his texts doesn’t count. I’ll wait so you can think. Never mind, I’ll save you time and energy. Nothing, since you met Danyal, is the answer. You had a new plaything or new puppy to spoil. Nothing else matters until you get bored, and you’ll get bored with him. I pity anyone in your wake. That’s what happens in natural disasters. Real, lasting damage occurs after the event ends, and brutal reality becomes the norm.”
How dare Wynn fucking comment on my relationship and think he’s the goddamn expert on my life.
Anger flashed in Alex’s eyes, and he stood up abruptly. As he did so, every glass on the bar exploded, and the mirrors behind the bar smashed. All the patrons and bar staff fell to the floor covering their heads for safety. Only Alex and Wynn remained standing.
“There’s the immature and emotionally volatile Alex I know. Are you brave enough to hit me, or is emotional damage your preferred weapon?” said Wynn.
“Step the fuck off, Wynn, and answer my question,” said Alex.
Wynn went on to tell him that PGC recruited him to be the expert on all things Alex. He observed Alex every day at Yale. Wynn added Ditta thought he might be the lover to ignite the passion Alex needed to advance his progress. He said the only reward he received for being in Alex’s bed was imprisonment and pain.
“I was ruined and shattered like Horus. PGC was the only reason I escaped from Egypt and prison after three months. So, I’ll do my job as director of antiquities, but this conversation is over. I was a fool to believe you might actually offer an apology. Deity or not, you’re damaged and need help. But I don’t know if Dr. Sonja can perform miracles,” said Wynn before turning and marching towards the door, stepping out of the threshold into the driving snow.
“Stop!” Alex yelled, following Wynn out onto the sidewalk. Alex approached him, remained silent, and looked shamefully into Wynn’s eyes.
“Alex, did you just try using your god mojo on me? I have a rude awakening for you. All PGC employees receive vaccinations against the effects of their abilities. You can thank Ditta for this safeguard to ensure we gave her honest feedback without manipulation or undue influence. What’s it like to have no power over us, even as a god? And for the record, it’s probably karma for you to feel scared and isolated. I hope the feeling burns through you. You’re not a coward; you’re a fucking monster.”
With that, Wynn walked off in the snow with a smile on his face.
Alex struggled to process what had just transpired. He turned back to return to the bar, but was met by Galen standing before him in the falling snow.
“Professor Lieth, ya right?” said Galen.
“Did you hear our conversation, Mr. Tucker?”
“Yah. Whole pub did.”
“Were you aware?”
“Ware of what, sir?” said Galen.
“Did you know I can’t influence the board and PGC employees because of the inoculations?”
“Yeah, Ms. Dea insisted on it to keep the board objective. Wanted people around her to call her on bad ideas.”
“Are you immunized?”
Galen nodded.
Alex was alarmed by this revelation. It seemed like, at every turn, everyone around him had an agenda. “How can I be sure you’re telling me the truth?”
“Ya can ask if I’m being truthful,” said Galen.
“What’s your agenda, Mr. Tucker?”
“That’s not fair, sir. Can show you.”
“How?” said Alex.
“Lend me yur hand,” said Galen.
“Why?”
“Lend it to me, sir. Don’t worry, I can’t injure ya.”
Alex hesitantly stretched his right hand out to Galen, who took the shaking hand and placed it on his chest.
“Ya can’t see mah energy or spark. Ya can feel it through touch if I let ya.”
“If you let me?” said Alex.
“Enough chitchat. Focus on feeling the energy,” said Galen.
Alex sensed the warmth and tenderness of Galen’s skin in the drifting snow.
“Ask mate, can ya trust me?”
“I didn’t need to ask you, Galen; I sense it. You’re not lying to me.”
“Can we go back inside? It’s nippy.”
“Thank you, Galen.”
“Eh, for what?”
“For…this. How did you know touch would work? Does the board know?”
“Yu’re welcome, and dunno if the board knows. Ms. Dea shared that secret with me on her last night. Said there would come a day ya’d use that nugget. Carpe diem. Anyway, maybe we should blow this joint before all the bears attack me.”
Alex laughed. “Yes, maybe it was too much for your first time in a gay bar.”
“Not even. Many gay rugby teams in Australia loved to take us All Blacks to gay bars. They’d buy us a stubbie and see how pissed we’d get.”
“You’re full of surprises, Mr. Tucker. Would you be willing to try a new restaurant around the corner? I’m starving and have this new corporate credit card to break in. If you’re uncomfortable, this is a business dinner. You could keep me safe from potential cutlery accidents while I get takeout for Danyal.”
“Not sure that’s a line to cross with mah boss.”
“Maybe our relationship is unique,” said Alex.
“Reckon there’s a compromise. Sit at the same table, but I’ll pay with mah scratch.”
“That’ll do. Let’s get your coat. I think you’re freezing.”
“I’ll skull my stubbie and grab my jacket. The warm limo awaits,” said Galen.
Alex watched Galen laugh as he stepped out of the limo.
“Ya got me. Expected a fancy French restaurant. Not a Mexican/Asian fusion food truck,” said Galen.
Alex chuckled. So Galen didn’t know everything about me from social media. He had heard this place did a killer Thai peanut chicken burrito. Danyal and Alex had tried to eat here a few times, but the lines were far too long. Luckily, the snow tonight had driven the lines away. He’d been living as a student for so long and, most recently, on a new professor’s salary, that treats like dining in fancy establishments were few and far between.
“If you live paycheck to paycheck, you learn quantity is more important than quality,” said Alex.
“Gotcha. Know what it’s like to be flat broke growing up in a wop-wops village. Didn’t know how strapped we were until I grew up,” said Galen.
“Now that we have this delicious food, should we wait to eat at the apartment or savor the moment here?” said Alex after returning to the warmth of the limo. He was teasing because Galen had already unpacked his burrito and taken several large bites.
“Apologies, sir. Bad habit from the military. Had a limited amount of time in the mess and the field. Ya ate fast for safety reasons.”
“What other lasting effects do you have from the military?” said Alex.
“Used to go jugging, but military ran me ragged.”
“Danyal likes to jog, and he dragged me along when he could get me out of bed on weekends. I probably wouldn’t run if I weren’t chased these days.”
“Getting a swole on has many benefits. Improves sleep. Works as a natural happy pill and helps anxiety.”
“I guess. First, we’ll need the weather to get warmer.”
“Will get out mah running gear, sir.”
“Do you enjoy listening to music while running?” asked Alex.
“Like all types of music, but EDM is mah jam. Keeps the energy pumping.”
“I love EDM,” said Alex. “Who are your favorite DJs?”
“Alesso, Tiesto, and Utah Saints.”
“Wow, Utah Saints are old school. They were popular way before either one of us was born,” said Alex.
“Classics jams are the best. Annie Lennox’s ‘Little Bird’ is mah all-time favorite remix. Reckon it reminds me of my twin sister, Amara. She’s mah ‘little bird.’ Current favorite songs? Tie between ‘Drugs from Amsterdam’ and ‘Lionheart,’” said Galen.
“Damn, Mau P and Joel Corry,” said Alex.
“Ya got any current favorites?” asked Galen.
“The Sam Smith ‘Unholy’ remix. But Danyal hates it and leaves the room when I play it. It’s his kryptonite. Who’s your musical kryptonite?” asked Alex.
“Skrillex. Grating noise.”
“Agreed, Skrillex makes my ears bleed and should be banned for public safety. How were the clubs in New Zealand and Australia?”
“Top discos were gay bars. Better music and stronger drinks,” said Galen.
“You surprise me, Mr. Tucker. We may have found some common ground. I used to love going to clubs to dance all night. Being on the dance floor is tribal, even primal. I miss the feeling. Maybe that’s one of the homework activities I could do for Hoko.”
“Haven’t visited a club in the United States. Mah job keeps me busy. Will sit in the corner drinking club soda to ensure yu’re safe if ya go, though.”
Alex said it might happen sooner than Galen thought. He explained he was the faculty chair for the LGBTQI+ student union at the university, and that they were holding a fundraiser next month at one of the local dance clubs for homeless queer youth. It was a noble cause and an opportunity to blow off steam. Galen smiled and stated he was up for the challenge.
“You aren’t what I expected, Mr. Tucker. I find you ‘curiouser and curiouser,’” said Alex.
“Lewis Carroll,” said Galen.
“An EDM aficionado and a literary enthusiast.”
“Alice in Wonderland was mah sister’s favorite book. Made our parents read it every night. Book started to fall apart, but Amara knew the story backward.”
Galen smiled, and he noticed Galen’s dimples for the first time.
“Can I request a favor, Mr. Tucker?”
“Could I stop ya, sir?” said Galen.
Alex laughed. “Probably not. Can you stop calling me ‘sir’? I feel like I’m your drill sergeant or your master. Not master in the context of slavery, but…”
“What ya getting at, sir?”
“Never mind. This conversation has turned awkward,” Alex said as his face turned beet red. There was no way he was finishing his thought about being Galen’s bondage master.
“Agreed, sir. Will consider it. What would ya prefer?”
“Alex, mate, or professor––any would be suitable. ‘Sir’ makes me feel ancient.”
“Danyal going to be OK with me calling ya Alex?” said Galen.
“You let me handle Danyal. May I ask you another favor, Mr. Tucker? May I call you Galen?”
“Yu’re the boss. Must respond to reasonable demands. Ask ya a question before calling it an evening?”
“Sure. I think that’s only fair,” said Alex.
“Does yur body feel different now?” asked Galen.
“Good question. I know alcohol and Klonopin doesn’t affect me anymore, and I’m a little bitter about it,” said Alex.
“Agreed, mate. Reckon that must suck.”
“Thank you for the company this evening, Galen. That’s enough for one night. I have a course in the morning and have appointments at PGC in the afternoon.”
“Ask ya another question, mate? For the road?”
“You may, Galen.”
“Was that ya with the exploding glass and smashed mirrors?”
Alex sighed. “I assume so. It appears my temper got the best of me. I hope no one was hurt.”
“Did ya attempt to use yur abilities on Dr. Caron?” asked Galen.
Alex hesitated. “You noticed. Regretfully, yes, I did.”
“What did ya try to do?”
“I was trying to help reduce his suffering. I know how we ended things in Cairo was horrible, but he’d no right to speak the way he did about Danyal.”
“Sounds a little sus,” said Galen, crossing his arms and leaning back in his seat.
“Yes. I was trying to take Wynn’s emotions down a few notches.” Alex knew he wasn’t being honest.
Galen raised one eyebrow as he looked at Alex. “Ya sure about that, mate?”
Alex looked away before turning back to answer. “OK, maybe I was angry and wanted him to shut the fuck up.”
“If he was unprotected, might ya have hurt him?” asked Galen.
Alex sat in silence without responding. Galen was right, but Alex was embarrassed by his true motivation.
“I don’t know, Galen. In retrospect, it was probably a risky move on my part. I got remarkably close to losing control of my anger, and I still don’t know the damage my abilities can cause.”
“Sounds honest, mate. Will have to report it, since Dr. Caron will probably make a report.”
“I understand, and thanks for your honesty. I don’t want to seem like a dangerous loose cannon.”
“Least ya can admit it, mate. Will report ya regret it,” said Galen.
“I guess that’s a small victory. Can I request we head home now?”
“Am knackered too, mate. Time to hit the hay. Will let the driver know.”
“I must ask for a final favor, Galen––please don’t tell Danyal I met with Wynn. Danyal is a wonderful man, but extraordinarily jealous.”
Galen nodded before agreeing to keep Alex’s secret. He added that security would be stationed outside Alex’s apartment until the security suite across the hall is ready. Alex asked what happened to Ms. Dundee in 3B, since she was the building’s “grandmother” and had lived in her apartment for thirty years. Galen replied that Ms. Dundee was right as rain and being financially cared for the rest of her days by PGC, who moved her to a larger flat down the hallway. He added that until Alex lived in the penthouse, a security suite across the hall was the best way to protect him.
“So, how has your second day on the job been?” asked Alex.
Galen said, “All good, mate. Haven’t given ya a reason to smite me yet.”
Alex chuckled as he appreciated Galen’s humor and honesty. He sat silently on the drive home, reluctantly admitting how much his interaction with Wynn had shaken him. It couldn’t have gone worse. OK, he didn’t take a swing at Wynn or implode him like the glassware.
The worst-case scenario would be Danyal finding out about his meeting Wynn, and Alex keeping it a secret. He was grateful Galen didn’t push him further about what had happened in Egypt. Alex was keenly aware he needed to stop acting like a madman, as he could only imagine what Galen honestly thought about him.