13. Chapter 13
Chapter thirteen
Alex
Alex stepped out of the limo outside the row of brownstone homes on Penderson Street, and his body was frozen with fear. He had the driver park a block away so as not to draw attention and to give him the time on the walk to fortify his nerves, but he misjudged the level of his apprehension. Alex stood silently on the bottom step of 2756 Penderson, petrified and unable to move. He couldn’t make peace with Shae unless he was brave enough to ring the doorbell.
Galen quietly held back, about twenty-five feet down the sidewalk.
Alex cautiously reached out, rang the doorbell, and was greeted by loud barking. Shae slowly opened the door, but before Alex knew it, he found himself lying on his back with a large dog standing over him, licking his face.
“Horus!” Alex cried. “It can’t be!”
“Boris!” yelled Shae. “Get off him. No jumping!”
“But how? How is Horus here?” Alex could barely speak as the black and white dog kept licking his face intensely.
“Let’s walk to the park around the corner to have some space to talk. I’ll get my coat,” said Shae.
“Some space to talk, or so I won’t be here if Wynn comes home?”
“Don’t push your luck, Alex. My gut tells me to send you packing,” said Shae.
Alex sheepishly asked if he could walk Boris, and Shae reluctantly agreed after warning that Boris likes to pull on his leash and to be careful not to trip on the ice. Shae explained that they called him Boris as part of his fresh start in America. Alex nodded that he understood.
Alex and Shae sat on a park bench in awkward silence as Galen and Boris played fetch with a tennis ball.
“Who’s your handsome shadow?” said Shae, finally breaking the silence.
“Oh, Galen. He’s my bodyguard.”
“I’d let that fine specimen of a man guard my body any day.”
Alex was amused that, as usual, Shae was more focused on the eye candy than the tension between them, or the fact Alex now needed a bodyguard. Shae lived purely in the moment, and Alex desperately wanted that ability. His friendship with Shae kept him balanced and focused on being present throughout college.
“Same old Shae. I’ve missed your flirtatious personality. Galen’s a great guy; the New Zealand accent doesn’t hurt his attractiveness.”
“You always did have international tastes.”
“Stop it, Shae––it’s not like that.”
“How is it, Alex?” said Shae as he refused to turn to look at Alex. “I know you better than anyone, and I’ll call you on your bullshit. You’re attracted to that man.”
“I didn’t say I wasn’t. I may be in a relationship, but I’m not dead.”
What was there not to like about Galen? He’s handsome—tall, with broad shoulders, powerful legs, and arms with tattoos on each forearm. Galen was ever hotter in his rugby uniform pictures. Despite having a neatly trimmed brown beard, his chiseled jawline framed his face with its deep brown eyes, his soft, wavy brown hair bouncing in the wind.
“Definitely a ‘Squirrel.’”
Shae laughed for a fleeting moment, breaking the tension. “I almost forgot about squirrel.”
“Squirrel” was their code to alert each other that an attractive guy in the area deserved their attention. Galen was, indeed, an impressive example of a “squirrel.”
“Mind in the gutter as ever,” said Alex.
“I learned from the best,” said Shae as he briefly made eye contact for the first time. “If you don’t want Galen, he can always be my future ex-husband.”
“I’ve missed you, Shae. How long has it been since we hung out?” Alex regretted the question as soon as the words had come out of his mouth.
“Let me think––that would be from the moment you met Danyal.”
Shae’s response was honest and stoked Alex’s feelings of shame. “Ouch, I deserved that one.”
“You deserve that and a few more from where I’m sitting,” said Shae as he turned toward Alex, tears forming in his eyes. “You hurt me. I thought we were close friends who valued and cherished each other. But when you met Danyal, you discarded me like yesterday’s trash. I tried to reach out to you, but you were always busy or didn’t have time. There was no room for anything in your world but Danyal. I depended on you; you were there for my physical recovery after being gay-bashed. I thought we were ride-or-die friends. Little did I know it was ride until the next hot guy came along,” Shae said, tears now rolling down his face.
Alex paused before responding, holding back his own tears. “I’m sorry, Shae. There’s no excuse for how I behaved. I love you like a brother, and I behaved horribly. I’ve been hearing a lot recently how much my choices have hurt others, and I deeply regret it.”
“Wow, the proud Alex Lieth saying he’s sorry is not something I ever thought I’d hear. But it’s not enough to let you back into my life.”
“I promise, Shae, I’ll earn back your trust if you let me.”
Shae looked at Alex. “Damn it, Alex, I’m not forgiving you so easy.”
Alex sat in silence, fighting back his own tears before saying, “I’m so sorry, Shae. This was a mistake. I’m sorry to bother you. I won’t do it again.”
“You don’t get to walk away from me again, Alex,” said Shae, standing and walking towards Galen and Boris.
After gathering up the dog, Shae started to leave the park, but Boris broke free from his leash and ran back to Alex’s bench. Alex continued to sob as he petted Boris. Shae came over and looked down at Alex.
“One last thing I need to get off my chest––come here, asshole, and give me a hug before I change my mind and kick your ass across this park.”
Alex stood and embraced Shae for several moments, while Boris returned to play fetch with his new buddy. Alex could feel the spark in Shae’s chest pulsing. Shae sat back on the bench with Alex, and asked if he planned to ask about Wynn. Alex shook his head no; he had no right and wasn’t brave enough to broach the subject. He was surprised when Shae said that Wynn had returned from Egypt broken and damaged. It was like a part of him was still there in prison. Shae explained that Wynn didn’t sleep well due to nightmares and being hyper-vigilant, meaning his mood was often unpredictable. Alex said it sounded like PTSD, and Shae agreed. Shae added Wynn had been seeing a psychiatrist who’d prescribed medication, but that he wouldn’t take it––he was too proud. Shae shook his head and stated that the handsome, stubborn man would be the end of him. Alex placed his hand on Shae’s back for emotional support.
Alex asked Shae if he loved Wynn, and Shae nodded yes. He already knew the answer before Shae replied, because he could see the spark in Shae’s chest pulse as he talked about him. Shae stated Wynn cared about him too, but that it was difficult when the relationship was between Shae, Wynn, and Wynn’s demons. Alex leaned over on the bench and kissed Shae on the cheek before offering an ear if Shae ever needed to talk. Shae thanked him for the offer, but Alex knew Shae would never use it.
“You haven’t mentioned Danyal,” said Shae as he laid his head on Alex’s shoulder.
“Danyal is, well, still as jealous as ever. He’s not talking about it, but I know he’s struggling with Galen being around.”
“I’m sorry, Alex. It sounds like the men in our lives are less than ideal.”
Alex added that dealing with Ditta’s company was also proving very taxing. Shae sat up and gave Alex a confused look, quirking an eyebrow. He explained that Ditta had passed and left him her company and penthouse. Shae laughed with his hand over his mouth and said if Alex was living the penthouse highlife, he would be hosting the next party. Alex shook his head and told Shae he had rejected the penthouse, causing Shae to shake his head back in disapproval.
“I have a question, one I hesitate to ask…,” said Alex. “But how did Wynn bring Boris back to the States?”
“From what he says, he refused to come back without him. The company he worked for pulled several strings to make it happen. The poor pup was sickly, but we nursed him back to health, and he soon got adjusted. We love him,” Shae said, looking over at the dog.
“You’ve nothing to worry about, Shae. I have no claim on Boris. He belongs to his dads…you and Wynn.”
“How did you know what I was thinking?” said Shae.
“An educated guess,” Alex lied after having read Shae’s thoughts about how much they loved Boris. Following his session with Hoko, his telepathy skills had improved since he’d learned to quiet his mind by focusing on breathing.
Alex told Shae it would be great if he could see pictures of Boris on social media and, maybe in time, they could have playdates in the park if it didn’t cause any issues with Wynn. Shae assured Alex he’d handle Wynn, but that he’d have to think seriously about unblocking Alex. It’d take more than one successful meeting in the park to take that next step.
Alex laughed and said Shae was incorrigible when Shae stated Boris had taken a liking to his “Chippendale shadow.” Deep down, Alex loved Shae’s flirtatious nature. He went on to say that, if Shae wanted to see a show, the university was having a fundraiser for LGBTQI+ homeless youth in two weeks at Icon Nightclub.
“You up for a night of dancing?” said Alex.
“Oh, you know that takes me back down memory lane. How will Danyal take you being out on the town with two handsome men?”
“Let me deal with Danyal.”
“You’re thinking about not telling him,” said Shae, as he locked eyes with Alex.
Shae had pegged Alex’s thoughts about the situation, and he knew lying to Danyal was unacceptable. He had to tell him. Alex quickly turned the conversation back to the offer he had made, and after hearing Galen had never been to a gay dance club in the States, Shae gladly accepted the invitation. He said it was his duty to protect and help culture a club virgin. Shae told Alex to text him the details and smiled as he walked again towards Galen and Boris, who had resumed their game of fetch. Alex smiled and waved at Shae and Boris as they left the park.
Galen walked over to the park bench and took a seat, catching his breath. Alex commented that it looked like Boris put Galen through a workout. Galen laughed and said Boris was an energetic lil pup. Alex replied that Boris always had been. Galen asked if Boris was the pup he found in Egypt, and Alex nodded yes. Someday, he would have to find a way to thank Wynn for giving him a home.
Galen said that he didn’t want to overreach, but that he’d seen the look on Wynn’s face at the bar, and it matched many soldiers in combat. He recommended a PTSD specialist a mate of his used after leaving the service. The therapist wasn’t in Boston, but many therapists had been doing online therapy since COVID. Alex thanked Galen and agreed to pass the information on to Shae.
With a big smile, Alex asked Galen if he was ready. Galen hesitantly asked what he needed to be prepared for. Alex updated Galen on the plans to go dancing in two weeks with Shae for the homeless LGBTQI+ fundraiser. Galen was excited, but added he had nothing to wear. Alex chuckled and said not to worry; Shae was a fashion guru who would pick something out for him, but to watch out as he was a notorious flirt. Galen stated the warning was received and that he would try not to encourage Shae too much, as he stood to walk back toward the limo. Alex had no clue how to read Galen’s comment about encouraging Shae.
As they reached the limo, Galen opened the door for Alex and told him that Ryo had found alternative transportation. They’d take it out on their maiden voyage to go dancing, so they could have a memorable night on the town.