26. Logan
Chapter Twenty-Six
LOGAN
I meet Meredith at the office before hustling her into my car and driving to the ob-gyn's office. I’m terrified that things won’t go well, that there’s something wrong with the baby…
It’s like there’s this constant yelling in my ears, but it’s all worried thoughts.
I just want her to be happy and healthy. Both of them.
She snaps her fingers in front of my face and finally, I come back to my senses.
“Logan? Are you back to Earth now? You missed the turn a while back.”
“Fuck. Sorry," I mumble, turning around and finally making it to the doctor’s office. “I guess I’m just nervous."
She reaches over to grab my hand and squeezes it. “I’m nervous, too. But we just have to stay positive.”
I nod, and I’m grateful that she holds my hand as we walk into the office and sign in.
She sits down, and I do the paperwork, paying for the visit up front, including for the ultrasound pictures.
I want a dozen of them, even though I don’t have anyone to give them to. Hell, after finding out this baby is mine, I want to plaster them all over my walls, I’m so proud.
“Miss Whitlock?”
I stand up with her. “Can I come back?”
“Are you the father?”
I smile. “Yep. That’s me.”
“Then of course. We love for our patients to have an active partner.” The nurse smiles at me, and we follow her back.
The one thing I want to be that my father wasn’t is present . And it starts with these appointments. I don’t care how much I work. I’m going to make time for my child.
And for Meredith. I’ll be there for her in any way she’ll let me.
I help Meredith undress and put on the little paper gown, patting her little belly as I do so.
She frowns. “Don’t do that. Mother is already calling me fat.”
I scoff. “Your mother is a braindead?—”
She glares at me.
“Sorry. But you’re not fat. You’re gorgeous, and you’re going to be gorgeous until the day you die.”
She smiles at me. “You really think so?”
“You know I do. Otherwise, you wouldn’t be knocked up, would you?"
Meredith’s loud laughter lasts until the ultrasound technician comes in, and then she goes silent.
“We may not hear a heartbeat this early,” the tech warns. “But don’t worry, it’s pretty common if it’s before ten weeks.”
She puts the jelly on Meredith, who squeals a bit, gripping my hand, and then places the wand down on her belly.
After a few moments of the technician moving the wand back and forth, a whoosh-whoosh-whoosh sound comes out loud and clear.
I gasp. “Is that?—"
“That's your baby."
I watch as she moves the wand around again, showing a little peanut with a strong heartbeat.
“Oh, it’s so small.” Meredith’s voice is full of worry.
“That’s normal. You’re only about nine weeks along, according to the measurements. You probably aren’t even showing yet.”
“I’ve already gained weight.”
“That’s normal. You’re pretty thin. The doctor will want you to gain more, I’m afraid.”
Meredith doesn’t balk, just nods.
“I’ll feed her.” I grin, and the tech laughs.
“You’ve got a keeper.”
“Don’t I know it.”
I expect Meredith’s voice to be a teasing drawl, but she sounds serious, and I can’t help smiling at her when the tech prints out our pictures and leaves the room.
I look down at the ultrasound pictures as the doctor comes in, asking Meredith about her symptoms.
I’m only half-listening.
“We’ll have to do a glucose test since you told me about your mother’s gestational diabetes. That’s a real concern. It can cause the baby to be too large for a natural labor.”
My eyes fly to the doctor’s. “Gestational diabetes?”
“Yes, diabetes that only occurs during pregnancy. Meredith has a hereditary link, so we just want to keep an eye on it.”
“And if she does have it?”
“Then we’ll have to be careful, measuring baby’s size every couple of weeks instead of only a couple of times overall. She’ll have to watch what she eats and check her blood sugar levels several times a day. But let’s not get ahead of ourselves, all right? She and baby are doing fine right now.”
“She’ll make an appointment for the test?”
The doctor nods. “Any other questions?”
Meredith shakes her head, but I frown.
“Her nausea, it’s been really bad. She’s having trouble keeping things down.”
“I can prescribe a mild anti-nausea pill, but take it sparingly. Less medication is always best for the baby.”
“I’m also spotting just a little,” Meredith says in a quiet voice, and the doctor hums.
“No more than a tablespoon could just be implanting. Is it more than that?”
“No. Just a little.”
“Let’s keep an eye on that, too, yeah? Keep track of any changes, and we’ll schedule another appointment in a month. You should be ready for your glucose test then, as well. And of course, call if you have any problems or concerns.”
“Thank you very much, Dr. Dirk.” I stand up and shake the man’s hand.
Strange to think this little guy I tower over will hold my life in his hands when he delivers our baby.
His handshake is firm and sure, though, and that gives me hope.
Meredith trembles slightly when she stands, and I steady her.
“Are you okay?”
“Fine. Just... I was so worried something was wrong. I’m so glad the baby is okay.”
She trembles harder and presses her face into my chest and starts to cry.
“Everything’s going to be perfect.” I rub small circles onto her lower back to try and comfort her. “The baby will be perfect, and you’ll be the perfect mother.”
“I don’t think anyone is the perfect mother.”
I don’t want to argue with her, so I just help her dress, and we head out to make her next appointment.
Meredith takes out her card to prepay for her next appointment, but I stop her with a frown.
“This is on me. All of it.”
“You can’t pay for my whole pregnancy.”
“Like hell I can’t. In fact, you’re taking maternity leave.”
“Already? I still have months to go, Logan.”
“Yeah, but you heard the doctor. You can’t be stressed. Work is stressful.” I tug her to the car as she glares at me. “I’ll pay you the same.”
“I don’t want special treatment.”
“Who says it’s special? There are six months available for all my employees.”
“I’d prefer to spend that time with our baby.”
I groan. “Of course you can have more maternity leave, Meredith.”
“Not if it isn’t in the contract.”
“Contracts can be changed.” I grit my teeth.
Why isn’t she budging?
“Where are we even going? This isn’t the way home.”
I don’t answer, taking the right turn down to the poorer parts of town.
“I guess we’re taking the scenic route.”
I let out a long breath as I pull into a small two-bedroom house on the corner of the street.
Meredith sits up, looking around. “Where are we? Whose house is this?”
My cheeks heat up. “My aunt Beatrice. I know that you only met her a couple of times, but...”
“She’s the only person you have.” Her voice is quiet and a little sad. “I know we’re having kind of an argument right now, but I’m down to give some good news to your family.”
I let out a breath. “Are we having an argument? I thought we were discussing.”
She pats my arm, smiling blandly. “It was an argument. But we’ll table it.”
My palms sweat as we walk up to my aunt’s porch.
I haven’t called ahead, and I’m a little worried she’ll be angry with me.
We’ve lost touch over the last couple of years.
Meredith takes my hand, and it makes me feel a little better.
I clear my throat as I ring the doorbell, feeling like something’s stuck in there.
It takes a few moments, but eventually, Beatrice makes her way to the door and when she opens it, the shock in her eyes probably mirrors mine.
She’s aged over the last couple of years, but I shouldn’t be surprised. She’s nearly seventy-five years old.
Guilt washes over me, and I wish I’d kept in better touch with her.
“Logan? Is that you?” She squints before putting on a pair of thick glasses hanging from a lanyard on her neck. “And you’ve brought a lady friend.”
“You remember Meredith, don’t you, Beatrice?”
Her tender eyes widen. “Meredith, yes, of course! I didn’t know the two of you were still in touch.”
“We weren’t, actually. Not until recently.” Meredith steps forward. “Can we come in?”
“Of course, of course.” Beatrice steps backward and opens the door.
I walk in and reach down to hug her. She feels small and frail in my arms.
I can’t wait to share our good news.
I just wish those news included a wedding invitation too, but I don’t think that will ever be in the cards for us.