Chapter Fourteen
B efore meeting Licia to get ready for another evening of King Hadeon parading his family in front of court, I decide I have enough time to check the library once more. Those runes keep appearing in dreams along with a darkness so dense, I can’t breathe. If I can figure out what they mean, maybe I’ll be closer to figuring out more about my past. There’s one more section I think to check, one that may just be untouched by Hadeon and his magic-fearing hands.
The last time I was here, Licia and Gryphon had occupied the garden and herbs section, so I couldn’t check it. But since everyone else seems busy preparing for the evening, I have the library to myself.
I’ve been thinking, the statue itself is in the garden. It’s a stretch, but maybe there’s a log or journal of some sort that would list different flora and fauna in the castle garden along with the garden sculptures and their locations.
This time, the library is completely empty. The silence is a stark contrast to the buzz of the healer’s ward and a welcome comfort after the run in with Hadeon and Tristana.
In the stacks, the selection is overwhelming. I run my fingers along the spines of the books, looking for something to catch my eye. I stop at a particularly dusty book, pulling it off the shelf before I even read the title. A Study of Ornaments, Whispers from Stone. The spine reads in looping gold letters, almost too faded to make out.
The illustrations are intricate and specific. My heart beats quickly knowing that if the statue is in here, it would surely have a detailed description of what the runes mean. But the feeling fades quickly as I realize this tomb must be too old to have something about that particular statue in it. There are runes, though, on a few other pages, so I pull the book to my chest, thinking tonight I’ll have more time to slowly work through it.
A breeze lifts my loose curls off my neck and I spin to see what the disruption could be. There were no footsteps to announce someone, at least none that caught my attention. A deep laugh sounds behind me, between me and the stacks I was just facing. I jump at the close proximity of it and his hands find my hips. I look down to calloused fingers running up and down just below my ribcage.
“It’s you.” Knowingly, I rest my hands on his. The last time we were together, I relished the way his lips felt against my own but refused him because it was the right thing to do, but it wasn’t what I wanted. He’s mysterious and alluring in a way that moves me to action, moves me closer to him. And this time, rather than fight it, I lean against him, my back finding satisfaction in each muscle and curve I can feel flexing as I lean closer. And this time, I won’t run.
Thaddeus takes the opportunity to give me a flourishing twirl deeper into the row of books. I smile, feeling lighter than I have in years. Lighter, and so many other emotions I don’t yet have a name for. But I like it. I like the strength I feel when my decisions are my own.
In the middle of the bookstacks, Thaddeus gives me a playful grin and his eyes are full of heat. He brings my hand to his lips, kissing each finger, starting with my pinky and ending at my pointer finger. Then, he directs it into his mouth and sucks a long, slow pull from my knuckle all the way to my fingertip. An involuntary intake of breath at the brazen act leaves my mouth at the same moment my thighs tighten.
He smiles again, this one softer.
My gaze flicks from his lips to his eyes, and what I see completely undoes me.
Thaddeus’ hungry gaze locks on my lips. Pure desire in his eyes.
I lean in, strength pouring through me, giving me more confidence than I’ve ever felt. The moment our lips meet, a groan of satisfaction leaves his lips and I’m undone.
Any reserve or hesitation I felt before is completely gone. My hands find the evening scruff across his face and wrap around his neck while his hands pull me closer into him, where I instantly feel his arousal against me.
I’m no stranger to kissing, and I was a married woman, but this—there’s more desire in this moment than I've ever felt with any other lover. My hunger for his kiss—his touch—grows with every moment.
He guides me backward, not breaking from our closeness and presses me up against the darkest section of the stack. My body arches up to his while my chest rises and falls against his own with anticipation.
The mix of old book smell and his fresh frost scent makes me dizzy and I lose myself in his hungry kisses. His lips crash into mine, demanding attention just as the bulge in his pants presses hard against my thigh.
My hands trace the muscles in his back, up his shoulders, and up into his hair with the tips of each twist brushing my fingers. He pulls my leg up, wrapping it around his hips as I try desperately to find more friction and relief. He obligingly catches my thigh and pulls me closer until only my toes touch the ground. The feel of him against me, even with all these layers, is sure to bring me to a quick release.
My mind drifts for just a moment, reminding me that just weeks ago, I was content on my own. My small cottage was enough and my moat of a garden wrapped me safely inside my own world. Even my husband left me for months at a time, leaving me lonely but content. And now—
“Come back to me,” Thaddeus breathes against my lips. The shock of a soft nibble against my lower lip pulls me right back to where I’m supposed to be. I return the heat of his kiss; my tongue tracing his lips and then delving into his mouth, deepening the kiss, leaving no question that my mind is elsewhere.
Then, he falls to his knees in front of me, pushing my skirts up and up as I gather them in my hands. He kisses his way up my thigh, but all pretense is gone. His hands find my undergarments and guide them down my legs, placing kisses everywhere the clothing touches on its way to my ankles. He guides each foot out and surprises me by putting them in his pocket.
His eyes meet mine in a silent demand to stay quiet. The way he looks down on his knees staring up at me makes me feel so many things. I feel powerful and strong, and soft and languid all at the same time.
Above him, I feel powerful and in charge. Something I’ve never felt before except in the healer’s ward. But this is different.
The energy flows through me, pooling at my core.
His kisses find my warm center and I melt into the books behind me. His moan of satisfaction is muffled by my skirts, but mine—mine is not.
As his tongue licks and sucks between my legs, my pleasure continues to mount. I pull my skirts even higher, so they’re up around my hips, giving him more room to work, but I crave more contact.
With one hand, my fingers run along the twists in his hair that have broken free of the band holding them back. My pleasure continues to grow and my body is in an upward spiral toward release. Just when I think I’m about to go over the edge, he pushes two fingers inside of me to match his rhythm. My body answers him and I ride his face harder, rocking back and forth.
He adds another finger inside of me, finding the spot deep inside me, the one that makes me come undone in a way I’ve never before. Is this how it's supposed to feel?
A string of inaudible words pass my lips as his motions quicken. While his tongue and fingers are busy, his thumb finds that perfect bundle of nerves, rubbing and circling it until I can no longer hold on. My hands fly up to the shelves behind me—searching for something to grab onto—as I lose all control. I don’t even hear the books fall to the ground beside me as I cover my mouth before the entire library knows just what’s happening in this stack of books. I ride my pleasure for what seems like hours, and Thaddeus obliges; his movements never waning, bringing me over the edge again and again.
I can’t take it any longer and I pull him up to me. Our lips crash together and I can taste myself on his lips. He exhales a frustrated huff as his fingers blindly fumble with the laces on his pants. But just before his cock springs free, voices and booted footsteps enter the library, gathering around the map table from what we can hear.
With a raised eyebrow, Thaddeus looks to me for his cue. I shake my head, knowing that if I get caught with him, his life would yet again be on the line. He reluctantly loosens his grip, holding my hips and giving me a moment to find my balance once more before he straightens and adjusts his pants. My skirts fall around me and I busy myself by fluffing and straightening them.
His cool touch brushes a strand of hair away from my face and he kisses me tenderly, sending my sensitive nerves tightening and sparking once again. The sensation sends a thrill through me knowing my undergarments are in his pocket.
“You undo me completely.” His quiet voice is hoarse from misuse so he clears his throat. “Until I don’t know who I am anymore.”
I nod, agreement at the tip of my tongue, but then I realize it’s the opposite—I know myself better than ever before. And he’s been part of the unlocking.