13. George
Chapter thirteen
George
“We don’t have to talk about it right now,” I offer.
The clouds in Catherine’s expression make me wince. She’d been so animated when talking about the facts she learned about Sandburrow.
Have I ruined the evening by bringing this up?
Catherine shakes her head. “After that beautiful proposal? We do need to talk about it.”
She gives me a soft, teasing smile. It disappears quickly.
We go to the living room, where we take our seats on the sofa. I moved it back to where I like it, beneath the bay windows.
The twilight outside casts a purple glow over Catherine’s hair. She looks like the heroine of some tragic film.
“I was unfair to you on our graduation day,” she says slowly.
I wait, watching as she gathers her thoughts. I can practically see her plucking them from the air.
“I lashed out at you when it wasn’t you that I was angry about. It’s the day that I learned that my mother had another daughter.”
My stomach drops. “On our graduation day? So that’s why she didn’t come to see the ceremony?”
“That’s the reason she gave.” Catherine gives me a hurt look. “But she didn’t want to come anyway. She told me so.”
A sigh whistles from my lungs. “I’m sorry.”
“I hadn’t spoken to June in almost two years,” Catherine says. She wraps her arms around herself. “I stopped calling. That’s all it took for her to pretend as though I didn’t exist. But I still sent an invite to the ceremony. Some part of me hoped that this time, she wouldn’t disappoint me.”
“Just before we were leaving, I saw that we got mail from her. It looked like a card. I was so excited. I thought that even if June hadn’t shown up to support me, she at least remembered.”
The clouds on her face grow deeper and I brace myself for what’s to come.
“It had nothing to do with me. I said ‘we’ got mail from her, but it was really Grandma. My name was shoved in under hers as an afterthought.” Catherine rubs her hands over her face. “I remember every word, announcing the birth of her daughter, Katherina.”
I rub the back of my neck. There’s no use in trying to pretend as though both sisters didn’t share the same name.
“It felt like a slap to the face. I could barely hold it together during graduation. Then…” Catherine shakes her head. “Then you said one wrong word and I exploded. It wasn’t fair to you.”
“But understandable, since you had so much else going on.”
Catherine frowns at you. “It’s not excusable, though.”
I give her a soft smile. “You were a kid. Kids rarely react in mature ways.”
I lean back against the couch, turning over this information in my mind. I’d always known that Lynn had raised Catherine. When I was a kid, it took me quite a while to wrap my head around the fact that Lynn was Grandma, not Mom to her.
My parents never liked June. They’d call her a flake and express how sad it was for Lynn to have a daughter that turned out that way.
But despite that, I never really knew how bad things actually were.
Even knowing that June named both her daughters what was essentially the same name. This makes it even worse. She couldn’t even call Catherine for two years? Couldn’t be bothered to let her know that she was pregnant until after she announced the birth of her baby?
“I’m sorry,” I say again, though I know no words will make it better.
What happened to make June turn out like that?
Catherine searches my expression. “You are, aren’t you? It’s not just a hollow statement. You really are sorry that I went through that.”
“Of course. I never realized how you felt about our rivalry. I was always proud of your accomplishments. You pushed me to be a better person,” I admit.
She lets out a heavy sigh. “I wish I’d known that in high school.”
“I wish I’d known my mother accused you of making me pot brownies.”
She snorted, shooting me an amused look. “Yeah, that wasn’t the best.”
“Knowing what you were going through puts a lot of your behavior into perspective.” I shake my head slowly. You deserved better. You know that, right? You deserved to have a mother that treated you better.”
Catherine gives me the smallest smile I’ve ever seen. “I know. But it doesn’t matter.”
I open my mouth to argue—how can it not matter?
She holds up a hand and shakes her head. “It doesn’t matter. Not really. Because regardless of June, Grandma was always there for me. And everything that happened shaped me into who I am.”
I take her hand in mine. “I hope you know that who you are is beautiful.”
Catherine turns her hand so our fingers twine. She doesn’t answer but the light in her eyes is enough.
It occurs to me suddenly that if anyone were to see us here, now, they would have no doubts that Catherine and I are engaged.
Even though we aren’t, not really.
And I’m not sure how I feel about that.
***
The living room is now fully drywalled. The molding is back in place. I step back and admire my work.
Lynn’s place is nearly done. On the ground floor, there’s still the bathroom and pantry I have to finish, but the main living spaces are finished.
There’s still work to be done in the crawlspace, too, but that’s not as important.
Yes, this place is really coming together.
Which means I’ll soon start the work in my own place.
The sale of the house that neighbors Lynn’s property has gone through.
The front door opens and closes. Catherine puts her shoes away and slips on a pair of heavy-duty slippers. Then she joins me.
She looks around the space, nodding. “Looks good, Callahan. We’ll be able to start moving Grandma’s things back in here soon.”
I smile warmly at her. “That’s the plan.”
She’s wearing a spaghetti-strap dress with a flowy shirt that laces up the front. With her hair in milkmaid braids and a delicate chain around her neck, she looks especially beautiful.
If I don’t stop staring, she’s going to catch me, so I look away.
Though it would be natural as anything to compliment her, I can’t.
Not because of her, but because of me.
Ever since we filmed my proposal… things have grown complex.
In that, I have far too many genuine feelings.
I wish I could say that it’s just a protective streak, wanting to help Catherine know her worth. You know, after I learned just what a flake her mom is.
But that’s not it at all.
Catherine knows her worth. She’s strong, resilient, and quite honestly the strongest woman I know, second only to Lynn.
She doesn’t need me.
These feelings aren’t mere savior complex.
I want to dream about a life with her. I want to get to know her better as an adult than I ever knew her as a kid.
“Where are Grandma and Katherina?” Catherine asks.
“They were going up to the city to grab some things for Katherina.”
Catherine nods, a thoughtful look on her face. “How much more work you got tonight?”
“I’m done.”
She grins. “Excellent! Let me go get on some fresh clothes, then we can sit outside a bit and talk. We’ve got a fully clouded sky and there’s a lovely breeze.”
“Sure,” I agree.
As she skips upstairs, I tidy up my things and then hurry to my truck. The overcast sky combined with a light breeze does make it nice out.
Using the truck to shield me from the house, I change out of my dirty work clothes to the fresh set I keep in the truck. Then I quickly wash my hands, arms, and face.
Catherine comes out of the house and settles on the front porch swing.
I head back up to join her, my heart skipping a beat.
She’s changed into casual jeans and a loose T-shirt. And she looks even more beautiful.
These feelings of mine… should I share them, or is it better to suffer in silence?
If anything, she’ll be upset if I admit the truth.
She didn’t come to Sandburrow just for me to complicate her life. Her life is already complicated enough.
“Donny released the photographs he took of us.” Catherine passes her phone to me.
The image is us kissing. Catherine Hart Tell-All was splashed over the image.
“What’s the feedback so far?” I ask cautiously.
“Mixed. But luckily it seems that most people are asking who is dating Crimson now that it’s clear I’m not,” she answers. She tucks her phone away.
I study her profile. “You know who it is, don’t you?”
“Yes.” Catherine pushes her toes against the smooth wood of the porch. A slightly regretful look crosses her face, but it’s gone shortly. “There’s a reason why his paramour looks so much like me.”
“Why?” I force back possibilities, not wanting to assume anything.
She bites her lip. “My mother.”
June ? June is dating Crimson?
“Yeah, I had that same reaction.” She points at my face. “Stunned disbelief mixed with disgust. I caught them making out. So naturally, I quit.”
“Naturally?” I repeated.
Catherine nods, her expression hardening. “I spent far too much of my life begging for my mother’s attention. When she finally gave it to me, it was by dating my boss. Things would be far too complicated. Besides, if things ever go sour between her and Crimson…”
“I suppose it is natural not to want to be involved in that,” I agree.
“On the brighter side, another company finally got back to me about my resume,” she adds, brightening again. “I’ve got an interview set. Lead director of a social media account. I can’t tell you who I would be working with, though.”
“Of course,” I say, nodding.
I hope that my expression is excited. Because she’s sharing good news, and I should be excited.
If she notices anything, she must chalk it up to still being stunned over June and Crimson.
Even that information is overshadowed in my mind, though.
Because I know what this interview and new job means.
It won’t be long before Catherine leaves again.
She won’t stay.
She never stays. Sandburrow is too small and simple for her. She’s made that clear; this place is a cage, and she needs space to stretch her wings.
I can’t ask her to give up her life and dreams in the big city to stay for me, either.
Can I live in the city?
I shudder. The thought feels too claustrophobic.
Which means we’re going to have to have a breakup soon. My heart sinks.
My resolve hardens.
Maybe I can’t ask her to stay. But before she leaves, I will tell her how I feel.