31. JAX
CHAPTER 31
JAX
The car ride is quiet, except for the faint hum of the radio playing something upbeat that neither of us is really listening to. Adam sits in the passenger seat, staring out the window, his backpack resting in his lap. The silence isn’t uncomfortable exactly, but it does feel oppressive.
It wasn’t like this at the ice-skating rink. Back then, before I knew he was my son, we talked more. He laughed more. I didn’t overthink every word, didn’t second-guess myself the way I do now. Now, every interaction feels loaded, like I’m trying too hard to be something I’m not sure I know how to be.
Heather is back in town. She arrived yesterday and texted me right away. But I haven’t been able to bring myself to text her back. How am I ever going to explain all the mess to her?
As if my thoughts summon her, my phone lights up with a text from her. Have you heard from Olivia?
I frown. What’s that supposed to be about?
I ignore the text, and turn to Adam.
“So,” I say finally, breaking the silence as we pull up to a stoplight. “You looking forward to school today?”
Adam shrugs, his eyes still on the window. “I guess.”
I grip the steering wheel a little tighter, nodding to myself. “You know, school wasn’t exactly my favorite when I was your age. But I always had hockey and football. Played professionally for a while before… well, life had other plans.”
That gets a small reaction—a shift in his posture, his gaze flicking to me briefly before returning to the window. “I know that. I knew that when I met you at the rink.”
I can’t help but smile. People rarely recognize me nowadays. “Maybe I’ll play someday too,” he says.
The light turns green, and I ease the car forward, my chest tightening at his words. “You’d be great,” I say, my voice soft but sure. “You’ve got the build for it already.”
He doesn’t respond, but the faint smile stays, and I take it as a win.
When we pull up in front of the school, Adam grabs his backpack and unbuckles his seatbelt. He pauses for a moment, his hand on the door handle, before glancing back at me. “Thanks for the ride.”
“Anytime,” I say, my voice steady even though my chest feels tight. “Have a good day, alright?”
He nods, opening the door and stepping out. As he walks toward the school entrance, he glances back once, lifting a hand in a small wave. I wave back, watching until he disappears inside. Maybe I’m not completely screwing this up.
My phone buzzes in the cupholder, breaking me out of my thoughts. I glance at the screen: Olivia. My heart skips a beat.
I’ve been dying to talk to her, but I know I can’t make contact, not without being dragged back into that mess again. Adam comes first. He has to. The court was pretty strict with orders.
But something about Heather’s text gives me pause. What if this is really important?
I answer the call, trying to even my tone. “Olivia.”
“Jax,” she says quickly, her tone breathless. “I need to talk to you.”
“I’m kind of in the middle of?—”
“I’m pregnant,” she blurts out, cutting me off. “And… you could be the father.”
The world seems to tilt for a moment, my breath catching in my chest. Pregnant. My mind races, trying to process her words. “You’re… pregnant?” I repeat.
“Yes,” she says, her voice trembling slightly. “I just found out. I don’t know how this happened, but… it did. And I thought you should know.”
The thought of being a father again, of having a chance to be there from the beginning this time, fills me with a kind of tentative joy I didn’t expect.
But then, just as quickly, the doubts creep in. What does this mean for Adam? For the fragile connection we’re just starting to build? How will this affect everything I’ve been trying to fix?
“Jax?” Olivia’s voice pulls me back. “Are you still there?”
“I’m here,” I say, my voice steadier now. “I… I don’t know what to say.”
“You don’t have to say anything right now,” she says quickly. “I just thought you should know.”
I close my eyes, letting out a slow breath. “Thank you for telling me. And, Liv… I’m glad you did.”
“Of course, you had every right to know,” she says.
I lean back against the seat, running a hand through my hair. “Are you okay?” It’s the only question I can manage, the only one that feels important in this moment.
“I think so,” she says, though her voice has a nervous edge. “I wasn’t at first, but… I’m dealing with it. I just thought you should know.”
I shake my head, the decision already forming in my mind. “Where are you?”
“At Ethan’s,” she says. “Why?”
“Because I’m coming over,” I say firmly, starting the car. “We need to talk about this. In person.”
“Jax—”
“I’ll be there soon,” I interrupt, cutting her off. “Just stay put.”
As I pull out of the parking lot, my mind races. I don’t know what I’m walking into, but one thing is clear—I need to see her.
The drive to Ethan’s place feels like it takes forever, even though I probably break a few speed limits getting there. My foot taps nervously against the gas pedal, and I have to remind myself to breathe.
When I knock on the door, it swings open almost immediately. Olivia stands there, her face pale.
“Hey,” Olivia says softly, stepping aside to let me in.
“Hey,” I reply, my voice lower than usual. I step into the apartment, my eyes sweeping over the room.
“So, you’re here. Good. Let’s talk about this.”
I nod, crossing my arms over my chest. “Yeah. Let’s talk.”
Olivia sits down on the armrest of the couch, her fingers twisting nervously in her lap. “I don’t know where to start.”
“How about the part where you’re pregnant?” Marcus says, his tone lighter than I expect, though there’s a tension behind it. “That seems like a pretty good place.”
Olivia glances at him, her lips twitching into a faint smile despite herself. “Fair.”
I lean against the wall, keeping my eyes on her. “How are you feeling? Really?”
“Tired,” she admits, her voice barely above a whisper. “And scared. And a little… excited? I don’t know. It’s a lot.”
“Yeah,” I say, nodding slowly. “It is.”
Ethan leans forward, resting his elbows on his knees. “Okay, so let’s figure this out. What does this mean for us?”
All three of us turn to look at him.
“Do we have to do this now?” Olivia asks.
“Yes,” Marcus says, turning to face her. “I’m with Ethan on this one. As much as I would like to play things casual, a baby changes everything.”
I let out a breath, running a hand through my hair. “First of all, we need to make sure Olivia’s okay. That’s the priority. Everything else comes second.”
Marcus nods, his expression serious. “Agreed. But what happens to Love Lab? Do we want to get the baby involved in this?”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean?—”
Ethan shoots him a look. “You think we don’t know that? We’ll handle it, but let’s not turn this into a PR meeting. This is about her.”
Olivia raises a hand, cutting them both off. “Guys, stop. I don’t want this to turn into an argument. I called you all here because I need you. I can’t do this without you. I’m terrified, okay? I don’t even know where to start, and I’m scared I’m going to lose all of you because of this.”
The words hit like a punch to the chest, and for a moment, none of us say anything.
“You’re not going to lose us,” I say. “We’ve been through too much for that.”
“I’ll be honest. I didn’t expect to feel this way when we started all of this. But somewhere along the line, it stopped being just about the project for me,” Ethan says.
“What do you mean?” she asks.
“I mean I care about you,” he says. “More than I thought I would. More than I was ready to admit.”
Marcus lets out a low whistle, shaking his head. “Well, guess we’re putting it all on the table, huh?”
Olivia looks at him, her brows furrowed. “Marcus?”
He leans back, his lips quirking into a faint smile. “I thought I was just along for the ride. I didn’t expect… this. But yeah, Liv, I care about you too.”
I swallow hard, my hands tightening into fists. “I thought staying away was the right thing to do,” I admit, my voice rough. “For Adam, for you guys, for everyone. But the truth is… I’ve been miserable. Because I love you, Olivia. I have for a while. And I’m done pretending I don’t.”
Her breath catches, her eyes wide as she looks between us. “You… you all feel that way?”
“Yeah,” Ethan says softly. “We do. Liv, I love you. I didn’t think it would happen. Hell, I tried to fight it. But it’s true.”
“I love you, too, Olivia. You’re one of the best things that ever happened to me.”
Her eyes turn glassy as she looks at each of us in turn. “I don’t… I don’t know what to say.”
“Say whatever you feel,” I tell her, stepping closer. “There’s no wrong answer.”
She lowers her hands slowly, her lips trembling as she speaks. “I love you. All of you. And it terrifies me.”
Marcus puts an arm around her waist, cocooning her belly. “It’s okay to be scared, Liv. We’re all a little scared.”
“But it doesn’t change how we feel,” Ethan adds.
“Or how much we want to make this work.”
Olivia looks down, her hands twisting in her lap. “I don’t even know where to start.”
I crouch in front of her, taking her hands in mine. “We start here. Together. One step at a time.”
She nods slowly, her gaze lifting to meet mine. “Okay.”
“So, uh, can we all agree to avoid any more grand dramatic revelations for at least a week? My old heart can’t take it,” Marcus says.
I roll my eyes. “Come on, Marcus. Not the time for that.”
“Just imagine, by the time the kid is in kindergarten, Marcus is gonna be at parent-teacher conferences with a walker, or worse, a motorized scooter.”
Marcus groans. “Are we already doing that?”
“Well, you started it,” I point out, and rightfully so.
“For your information, I’ll be the most active dad on that field. I’ll be out there coaching soccer games while you two are wheezing on the sidelines.”
“Right,” Ethan says, grinning. “Assuming you don’t throw out your back tying the kid’s laces.”
Olivia dissolves into laughter, clutching her stomach. “Stop it, you guys. I can’t handle this.”
Marcus shakes his head, but there’s a grin tugging at his lips. “You laugh now, Liv, but I’ll be running circles around both of them when the time comes. And if I need a scooter, I’ll make it look good.”
“Doubtful,” Ethan quips, earning another round of laughter.
The laughter fades, leaving a comfortable silence in its wake, but my thoughts are anything but quiet. My mind circles back to Adam, the way he looked at me this morning when he said he might play hockey someday. That tiny glimpse of connection—it felt fragile, like glass. And now, with Olivia’s pregnancy and everything else, I can’t help but wonder how this will affect him.
“What’s wrong, Jax?” Olivia asks softly, her eyes searching mine. She’s always been able to read me too easily.
I sigh, running a hand through my hair. “It’s Adam. Things are finally… getting better between us. I don’t want to screw that up.”
“You’re not going to screw it up,” Marcus says.
“You’re overthinking it.”
“Am I?” I glance at him. “What if Charlie uses this—Olivia being pregnant, the media, everything—to make things harder? What if Adam pulls away because of it?”
Marcus sits forward, resting his elbows on his knees. “We have options. Remember the arrangement we set up with Charlie? Let’s revisit that. She’s pragmatic. If we offer her a cut of the profits from the Love Lab, she might be more open to avoiding further trouble.”
Ethan raises an eyebrow. “Bribing her with money? That feels… messy.”
“It’s not bribing,” Marcus says.
“It’s business. She’ll see it that way, too.”
“She can’t exactly be reasoned with. This is Charlie Green we’re talking about. She doesn’t exactly operate on logic,” I point out.
“I can talk to the lawyers,” Olivia offers.
“No, but she does operate on self-interest,” Marcus counters. “Most of her problem with you stems with the fact that you’re getting more and more involved in Adam’s life. Some distance might help.”
“You want me to stop meeting my son?” I ask.
“No,” Marcus says, and then, after a pause, adds. “But maybe moving away for a while might be a good idea.”
“Away?” Ethan says. “As in out of Iversteen?”
“Yes, to Austin,” Marcus says, looking at Olivia. “That’s where Olivia’s company is at. We can work from anywhere but she can’t stay away from Death Crunch forever.”
Olivia shakes her head. “I can’t ask that of Jax.”
“It’s just something to consider,” Marcus says. “If we move away, the media attention towards Adam also goes away. Everybody is happy.”
“Will that work?” Olivia asks, looking at me.
“Are you sure it will work out with Charlie?” I ask Marcus. He nods. “Pretty damn sure. We could also get a separate apartment for you, Jax. Something close enough to Adam, so visiting him doesn’t become a logistical nightmare.”
“It’s moving forward. And it makes sense for all of us,” Ethan says, nodding.
Marcus straightens, rubbing the back of his neck. “It’d help me too, honestly. My daughter keeps asking about visiting me, and Austin would make it easier. It’s a win-win.”
Ethan lets out a slow breath, his gaze softening as he leans against the wall. “You know what? It’s not a bad idea. Austin’s got everything we need, and being closer to Adam could give Jax some breathing room with this whole situation.”
“But everyone needs to be on the same page for it to work,” Olivia says. “And if that includes taking a DNA test, so be it.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Ethan says.
Olivia hesitates. “I mean, it’s okay if you want to know who the baby’s actual father is.”
“It doesn’t matter,” Marcus says. “I really don’t care but if either Jax or Ethan?—”
“I don’t,” I say abruptly before clearing my throat. “I mean, I don’t want to know. It’s Olivia’s kid, which means I’ll love it no matter what. And I thought we had decided we’re sticking together. Does a baby really change that?”
“No,” Olivia says softly. “But I wanted you to have a choice. All of you.”
I look at her, and I see things with clarity.
“I do have a choice,” Ethan says. “And it’s being there for you.”
She looks at me.
“Then I’m willing to give it a try,” I say. “For Olivia.”