Chapter 27
CHAPTER 27
SOPHIE
S unlight filters through the sheer curtains, casting a warm glow over the bedroom. I stretch my limbs like a cat, revelling in how relaxed my body feels after what Will and I shared last night.
My heart lurches at the thought of last night. Memories come flooding back, and moments of ecstasy flash before my eyes: Will’s passionate groans, the feeling of him inside me, of us rocking together, our bodies fitting seamlessly as if we’re made for each other … I’m filled to the brim with delight, so much so that I can’t help but curl my toes from it all.
“Will,” I murmur, reaching out to touch him. My fingers brush cold sheets instead, and my heart plummets into my stomach. Empty. The space beside me is empty.
Will is gone.
Dread seeps into my chest, and my mind races to the worst. I fucking knew it. He got the same thing he’s wanted from me that he got from all those other women—I’ve been duped. But how is that even possible? The way he whispered those words in my ears …
I want to make love to you, Sophie. Tell me you want this, too.
Before I’ve had time to consider whether or not I’m overreacting, another thought hits me, more urgent this time. Julian hasn’t cried. That’s never happened before. He always wakes up at the crack of dawn, demanding to be fed. Sunlight is already streaming through the window, which means it’s late—too late.
“Julian!” I gasp, panic replacing the lingering warmth from the night before. I throw off the covers and stumble out of bed, not caring about my state of undress. I need my baby now.
I race down the hallway, my heart pounding in my ears. But before I reach the kitchen, a strange sound reaches my ears:
Laughter. Will’s laughter. And the girls, too.
And are those Julian’s soft coos I hear?
I take another step into the kitchen, and my heart leaps as I soak in the scene before me. There, in my cozy kitchen, stands Will, his muscular arms cradling Julian as he carefully feeds him a bottle of what I assume is thawed breast milk. His focus is tender and genuine, and the sight fills me with butterflies. Next to him at the table sit Gwen and Heather, who seem to be finishing up breakfast.
He didn’t run off. He made my kids breakfast.
God damn, this man.
I’ve barely had time to process the guilt at my previous assumption before Gwen points at me in a fit of laughter. “Mom, why are you naked?” Upon hearing her, both Heather and Will turn towards me. Heather breaks into a laugh just like her sister, and Will raises his eyebrows.
Heat rushes to my face. “Oh!” I back away into the hallway to hide myself, then rush back into the bedroom, only coming out once I’ve put my robe back on—and some underwear. During daylight hours, this is a family-friendly establishment, damn it.
“Let’s try that again.” I giggle as I step into the kitchen for the second time.
“I think you need your coffee,” Gwen teases me.
She’s right about that. Even though I’m still drunk from Will’s pelvic sorcery, the bliss I feel won’t save me from needing my caffeine.
“Morning, beautiful,” Will says, glancing up at me without missing a beat in feeding Julian. The corners of his eyes crinkle, and I can’t help but smile back. “There’s fresh coffee in the pot. I’d offer to make it for you, but …” He raises his arms slightly to showcase Julian. “Got my hands full.”
“I can’t believe you didn’t wake me. I kind of panicked when I woke up.” I give him a slight frown. I’m not mad; I’m grateful. But if I can get a bit of an upper hand in this power dynamic, I won’t miss the chance to do so.
“I figured you needed some extra rest after last night,” Will says, his eyes sparkling as he chuckles. My cheeks flush again. “And the girls helped me whip up breakfast.” He nods toward Gwen and Heather, who sit at the table, grinning from ear to ear.
I can’t even pretend to be upset. I’m too overwhelmed. “Thank you,” I murmur, swallowing the lump in my throat. I join the girls at the table, where they’ve left me some leftovers—scrambled eggs, toast, and fresh fruit.
That’s when I realize I’m royally fucked.
I’m in love with this man.
I love his playfulness and how it doesn’t come at the cost of a deep kindness. I love his generosity, his unwavering care for us, the way everything he does is aflame with passion.
I said it myself … Make love to me, Will. That’s exactly what we did. And he didn’t run out on me. He’s right here, offering me support, not looking anywhere close to running away toward the next woman he can find?—
I’m suddenly flooded with terror, its icy fingers gripping me from the inside. I try to ignore it as I sit at the table and join the conversation with my girls. I even try to get a few bites of breakfast into my system, but my mind is miles away.
This morning—and last night—is everything I want and more. But the thought of taking this leap again after Matthew is terrifying. Nausea grips me, and I do my best to swallow the food to get those calories in; that breast milk won’t produce itself.
What if I’m wrong again? Ten years ago, I took a chance on Matt, even though his best friend ruined my best friend’s evening. And while I can’t say I completely regret it, since without him I wouldn’t have my kids, I know for certain that I was wrong about him.
What if I turn out exactly like my mom? What if I have rotten judgement and keep falling for terrible men who cheat on me?
Will has never, ever shown commitment towards a woman. What’s so special about me that he’d break that habit?
I’m brought back to the present when Will’s hand covers mine. “You okay?”
Shit. I smile and nod. “Mhmm.”
Will frowns. He knows better than to believe that lie. But he also knows better than to ask me about it in front of the kids. So, he takes the hint and changes the subject. “My sister texted me earlier, and she’s inviting us over to her place for dinner.”
“Us?” I blink. “Like, all of us?”
“Yeah. She’s Cayce and Corey’s mom. The girls would have a great time.” He squeezes my hand in encouragement. “So how about it?”
“Mom, say yes!” Gwen pleads. “Cayce said he has all the characters from Bluey as toys at his house!”
I look at Will, who’s encouraging me with his eyes. I think I can swallow back my worries for today and go meet someone new. After all, I’ve been complaining about having little to no social life. Hell, I might even become friends with Will’s sister. And since she has kids, she knows the struggle.
“I’d love to,” I confirm, and both Heather and Gwen erupt into a fit of hoorays.
All four kids and Julian are playing with Will and Karan in the living room while Rachel and I chop onions for the French onion soup she’s got in store. At first, Rachel shyly refused my offer to help, but I wasn’t about to sit at this table and chat with her while just watching her work. So, I relented until she gave in.
Rachel is not at all what I expected, seeing as she’s Will’s sister and all. I expected a feisty, confident woman. But although Rachel and Will are basically identical—they share the same angular features, chestnut hair, and almond eyes, although hers are green—her demeanour couldn’t be more different from Will’s.
When we first arrived through her door, she greeted me politely while her husband Karan scooped me up in a big bear hug. Her narrow shoulders were stooped forward, her long, pin-straight hair partially in front of her face, as if to hide herself away. At first, I thought coming here was a mistake since she hardly seemed to want me here. But, as it turns out, she’s just shy. When it was just the two of us in the kitchen, she slowly started warming up to me, and now I can see that she’s definitely happy I came.
“You know,” she starts as she finishes up the last onion in the pile, “it’s been years since Will has introduced me to someone.”
“Yeah, but it’s not like this was his idea,” I retort with a snort. “Weren’t you the one who invited me and the kids to come over?”
“Yeah, I did.” She smiles softly and stops cutting. “Because he talked about you.”
“Okay?”
“That’s never happened.” Rachel resumes her expert slicing and tosses the final pieces in the bowl. My eyes are watering from all that onion cutting, but Rachel looks fine. She stands and grabs the bowl to bring it over to the counter, beginning the process of cooking the soup. “You probably know as well as I do that Will has a, um …” She hesitates to find the words.
“Tumultuous dating history?” I offer.
Rachel makes an approving grimace. “Yeah, that’s a good way to describe it. Anyway …” She fills the bottom of a large stockpot with oil and ignites the stove. “He hardly ever talked about those women. At least, not to me. And I’ll have you know, Will tells me almost everything about his life, so that says a lot.”
Everything? I’m guessing this means she knows about Matt and his cheating. Come to think of it, since Matt and Will were childhood friends, there’s a good chance Rachel grew up knowing Matt, too.
“And between you and me …” She leans towards the table so she can inch closer to me and lowers her voice. “I haven’t seen him this happy in years.”
A surge of bubbles spread throughout my chest. I have to admit I never paid particular attention to Will’s happiness when I was dating Matt. I thought he seemed pretty pleased with his life and his endless string of flings. But hearing Rachel tell me this now makes me feel fuzzy all over.
Rachel pinches her lips. “He’s been through a lot.” A wave of sadness passes over her face, and she looks at me. “Well, I know you have too. So, all I’m saying is … I’m happy you’re here. I truly think you’re exactly what he needs right now.”
A lump forms in my throat. I want to believe her. I truly do. The more time I spend with him, the more I realize that Will is what I need most right now, too. Even now, as I’m sitting in Rachel’s kitchen, my body aches to be closer to him, despite him being just down the hall.
“Can I ask you something?” I prod.
“Well, you just did.” Rachel smirks. Okay, maybe she’s got some of her brother in her after all.
I roll my eyes with good humour. “You know what I meant.” I scratch my throat. “Did you ever …” How do I even ask this without sounding insensitive? “Before Karan … did you ever get cheated on?”
Rachel sighs. “Yeah, actually. My first high school boyfriend.” She rolls her eyes at the memory. “He slept with a cheerleader.”
“That dick.” Poor Rachel. I can only imagine what she was like in high school. Beautiful, but quiet. Definitely not a cheerleader. “So how were you able to allow yourself to love Karan? To trust him enough to give him your life? To give him kids?”
“It didn’t come easily. It took me a long time to trust again. Sophie … I understand where you’re coming from.” Her eyes fill with compassion as she stirs her stock pot. “But Karan never gave me reason to doubt his faithfulness. At some point I had to choose between living in the past or looking at what his actions were telling me. And they were telling me he was head over heels in love with me and would never even remotely be interested in anyone else.” Her gaze has drifted, and I see stars in her eyes.
I mull over her words. She’s definitely deeply in love with Karan. And no matter how much I deny it, I think I feel the same love growing its tendrils around my heart for Will.
But will that be enough to make him stay?