Chapter 18
Autumn
Ipushed the cart through the store, looking for the underwear section. I hadn’t packed much when I left home, but I didn’t want to go back yet. I knew that there was a high risk of running into October, and I was still hurt.
I couldn’t believe that he had served time in prison, had a DV case, and had a whole kid. How could he judge Wilson for not being here for his child when he wasn’t even taking care of his child?
Auburn started whining. “What’s wrong, baby? Are you sleepy?” I reached a finger out and stroked her cheek soothingly. She yawned.
“Mommy . . .” she whined.
“We’re leaving any minute. I promise, sugar.” I kissed Auburn on her forehead and moved to the lingerie section. I grabbed a pack of panties and some bras to last me for a week. I normally ordered my items online, or I would go to Leather the women weren’t catty but welcoming.
Yet, when everything went down between him and me, I had pushed back.
I just needed time alone, and listening to what she was saying, I could tell that we probably wouldn’t continue our friendship.
“Did he admit to them, Autumn? Because, from my understanding, you asked him very pointed questions that he had to answer. But those questions don’t get to the heart of the matter, nor do they tell the truth.”
“I went online myself, Sarai. I saw that he served two years in the Withrow County Correctional Facility for domestic violence against Trisha Johnson.”
“You may have seen that, but it doesn’t tell the story,” she stated, smacking the back of her hand into her other palm.
“I guess you’re going to tell me that he was framed or he didn’t do it.”
“I’m going to tell you that it’s not my place to tell you anything, but I know that you’re both too stubborn to come together and work through it.”
“I’m not stubborn, and neither is he.”
“On this matter, you are. You’re being stubborn to protect your daughter and your heart after already being hurt. You have the right to do both those things, but you owe yourself, Auburn, and October the decency to hear the truth . . . the full story, Autumn.”
My jaws clenched, and Auburn started whining and wiggling in the cart. I pulled her up and into my arms. Patting her back, I replied, “I have to get home. My baby is hungry and sleepy, Sarai.”
“Fine. But let me leave this on your heart and mind: The only child he has is Auburn. There’s not a single child on this planet that has his DNA in their body.
As it relates to the DV case, it was a setup to send him away.
Consider that, and then I want you to be fair and at least hear him out.
If you don’t like what he has to say and decide to continue the way you are, fine.
But at least give him the benefit of the doubt. ”
I shook my head as I continued patting Auburn. “Fine.” That was all I would concede to.
“I hope to see you again, sis. We consider you family,” Sarai stated and walked away.
I had planned to run one more errand before I headed back to my parents’ house. That wasn’t going to happen. I needed to get back and feed my child. After that, I had other plans to see to.
I hadn’t told my parents or GiGi all the details about what happened between October and me, because they were quick to judge.
I had told Wynter what happened, and she advised me to give him the grace to tell me everything.
Now that Sarai had said what she’d said, I knew that maybe my little sister was right.
Wynter reminded me of when Frost hadn’t told her what was going on in his life when they’d first started dating.
She thought he was cheating with the mother of his daughter because he went running every time she called.
In fact, his daughter had some health complications that required them to be at her side whenever things went left.
Once they had that conversation, it cleared up so much in their relationship.
They had been great ever since, and they had a marriage that I envied.
I rushed back to my parents’ house, fed Auburn her chicken nugget meal for lunch, bathed her, and then put her in bed for a nap.
I asked my mama if she could watch Auburn for the rest of the day and night because I had some things that I needed to take care of.
No sooner than she said yes, GiGi stepped into the room and hollered, “Girl, gon’ get your man.
I was gonna give you another day to come to your senses before I went and snatched him up.
” Mama and I both hollered at the same time, and I ran out of the house.
I did not doubt that GiGi would try her hand with October if given half a chance.
A part of me regretted even opening the door for Wilson when he showed up on my doorstep out of the blue. When I saw him standing there, it had taken me by surprise. He came bearing diapers and a can of milk.
I should have thrown it back in his face.
He had to know that she had outgrown all that by then, but he hadn’t.
Foolishly, I had allowed him into my house when I should have slammed the door in his face.
He came with apologies and “gifts,” begging my forgiveness.
He said he at least wanted to see his seed.
It was pitiful that the last time he had seen her, she was a few months old.
Somehow, I had convinced myself that he could explain his absence in her life.
I hoped that he had something to tell me that made sense; he hadn’t.
Wilson’s only interest had been in me and not Auburn at all.
All the questions he asked were about me, what was going on in my life, and if I had moved on.
He had shown very little interest in Auburn until the end, when I mentioned dating someone.
He had gone so far as to ask if he could hold Auburn.
Foolishly, I said yes. It was ironic that I had given the benefit of the doubt to the man who hadn’t deserved it.
But to the man who had been loyal to me, I had given him my back.
I only hoped that I could make up for it today.
By the time I got back to my place, it was a little after four. There wasn’t much daylight left at this time of the year. It would be dark before seven o’clock. I knew that October wasn’t at home because his car wasn’t out front. I prayed that he would be coming straight home.
I placed two T-bone steaks, burgers, asparagus, and corn on the grill while I returned to the kitchen to make a seafood pasta. I grabbed the tealights and fairy lights from the closet in my hallway before I headed back outside.
I traipsed over to October’s place and strung the fairy lights around his wall and then found the outlet to plug them in beside his back door. I laid the tea lights around the edge of the patio and a small pathway back to my place.
By the time I finished lighting all those tealights, my back and knees were killing me, and I vowed to put in more exercise to get them in shape. After all, October loved me on my knees, and a girl had to be strong to take those back shots.
I took care of a few more things before I scrolled through the numerous text messages that October had sent me. I had left him on read for the last few days. I didn’t block him because my heart still yearned for him, no matter how angry and hurt I had been.
I came out of my text messages and went to my app to locate him. Sure enough, he had left the shop. It seemed like he was on track coming to the house, so I didn’t have much time left. I only prayed that he didn’t make a detour or have company coming over.
I headed back inside and put the finishing touches on the food before I plated our meal.
I didn’t know what would come of this conversation.
I did know that October had been a good man to me throughout our friendship and relationship.
At the first sign of trouble, I had jumped ship.
Not once had I shown loyalty to him for the man he had been.
Throughout my pregnancy, he had shown up to give me support at various times, whether it was carrying my bags from the car into the house, trimming my trees and hedges when the landscaping crew didn’t show, or even when he’d been there to get me to the hospital when I went into labor.
While I didn’t know the whole story, I was on the fence now.
I still hadn’t quite jumped back on the October bandwagon, but I was rooting for his story to be a good one.
I would rather have egg on my face and have acted foolishly than for him to be the horrible monster that Wilson had painted him out to be.
I chuckled humorlessly and shook my head.
That asshole hadn’t been anywhere to be found since the day he revealed those details about October’s life.
Not only had he not shown up again, but he also hadn’t answered my calls and text messages.
That was just like Wilson: show up and screw up my life and then disappear when things got rough.
I rushed to the window when I heard October’s engine roaring down our street.
I washed my hands and checked myself out in the mirror one last time.
I wore a pumpkin colored off-the-shoulder sweater, tan leggings, and dark brown thigh-high leather boots.
All my curves were strategically highlighted, including my glorious belly.
I grabbed two of his favorite beers from my refrigerator, a bottle of wine, a glass, and a bottle opener, and headed back outside.
“What’s going on?” His deep, husky voice was more of a growl with a bit of a bite to it when I returned with the food.
My heart cinched in my chest as I looked up at him. He looked around at what I had done, but he didn’t look happy. Tears stung my eyes as I realized how much I had missed him.