26. Grace
26
Grace
" G race?"
I jerked my attention towards the door, my butt resting on the edge of the bed where I'd sat for hours after my bath, watching the clock tick down.
Where I'd been alone, forced to deal with memories playing on repeat without a controller.
Javier's muffled voice slipped through the crack under the door, the knob twisting until it swung open, invading my sanctuary.
The only sanctuary I'd known.
He peeked his head in and frowned. "What are you doing?"
"Sitting."
"Like a robot?"
"I need to think." About anything else but them and Elias… "And I'm not allowed to swim."
"I didn't know you could. Isn't that why he had to rescue you?"
"He didn't rescue me." My shoulders sagged. "I can swim just fine."
"Then use the pool."
I tossed my hands into the air. "He told me no."
"Ah…" He stepped into the room. "Well, then in that case… use the pool."
"Don't be nice to me now. It wouldn't be authentic."
"I'm not." He stepped inside. "It's guaranteed to get you yelled at."
I sighed, suppressing another laugh.
Why is it that when you're sad, you refuse to see happiness? It's as though your mind and body reject the premise of it.
"If you're coming to get me for dinner, I'm not hungry."
The hunger pangs dissolved into the cacophony in my mind the moment my toes hit the hot water.
"He doesn't care." He shrugged. "Come down, or he'll see to it personally." He gave a subtle shake. "You don't want that embarrassment."
I grumbled, my teeth grinding together as I glanced down at the chemise covering my breasts, the weight of the towel on my head like two stones. "I'm not even ready."
"I'll give you five minutes to change." He raised a brow and cocked his head toward the closet. "We'll be in the formal dining room."
I studied his frame. A gray t-shirt hiding black tattoos that disappeared beneath his sleeves, each with various religious inscriptions and images, and a pair of jeans.
"Do I dress comfortably like you?"
He shrugged.
I blew out a heavy breath and stood, yanking the towel off my hair and tossing it to the bed. My crimped hair fell into my face as I drew clothes out of the closet, finding the ugliest shirt and baggiest jeans.
"Really?"
"Look away or leave."
"I'll be right by the door." He pulled out his phone, tapped the screen, and showed me the counting clock. "When the timer goes off, that's how you'll go downstairs."
"And here I was thinking you were understanding." I frowned.
Javier laughed with a crooked smile. "I can understand and not care at the same time."
I scowled as he closed the door, then discarded the chemise with a snug white shirt. The white sweats hugged my hips yet pooled at my healed bare feet, and the large tan cardigan hung down to my calves.
Lazy-chic.
The door swung open as I shuffled towards it.
Javier's gaze rose from the floor to my forehead and puffed out a hard, lengthy breath. "It's not going to work, you know."
"What?"
"He'll see you even if you were in a clown suit."
"I don't know what you're talking about." I shrugged. "I wanted to be comfortable."
He shot me a side eye and guided me through the door. "Keep telling yourself that."
I moped down the stairs in silence, three men trailing after me as though I were the popular girl in school and turned toward the eat-in kitchen.
"I said the formal dining." Javier tugged on my arm. "This way."
We turned through the open doorway toward the long dining room table they hadn't used since I'd been here. The vacant chairs surrounding the table lent a macabre air to the scene, as if their occupants no longer walked this earth.
"I thought you said they were waiting for me?"
He pulled out my chair as he snorted and plopped me in my seat. "No. I said he told you to come down."
I twisted in my chair as he sat next to me. "So what was with the five-minute countdown?"
"I wasn't going to wait for you all night."
Rolling my eyes, I stood. "I really hate you, you know that?"
"He doesn't care." A large hand landed on my shoulder, his spice wafting around me. "Have a seat."
My butt dropped into the opulent chair.
These cost more than my parent’s car—guaranteed.
Elias glided his hand across my shoulders as he approached his seat at the head of the table, taking his place beside me.
I glared at Javier, who laid his napkin across his lap.
"What are you wearing, Grace?" Elias frowned as he sat.
My skin flushed, and gooseflesh bubbled up and down my legs as his voice caressed me. "C-clothes."
"She wanted to be comfortable." Javier rested his arms on the table as he leaned forward.
Clicking heels moved behind me. "She certainly looks the part." Nadia took her seat, her composure causing me to quake.
My spine straightened, and my shoulders tensed.
Rosa followed and sat beside her with Valeria's help. "How are you feeling, mi hija?"
"Mm." I gulped. "Could be better."
"What's wrong?" Elias braced his elbows on the table, his hands folded.
"Upset stomach."
Javier shook his head. "She's fine."
"And you know that based on your five-minute interaction with me?"
"You're easy to read."
I scrunched my chin and leaned away from him. "I am not."
"You are."
"Am not."
"I'm not arguing with a little girl."
I scowled. "I 'm twenty years old; that's hardly considered little."
"Wow, you argue like siblings." Nadia laughed, her hand shifting over Elias' resting on the table. "I see you're fitting in well here. Flirting with Javier, alone in Elias' office… even Rosa has stars in her eyes."
Flirting?
She thinks I'm interested in…Javier?
A shiver ran through me, my belly grumbling as the table fell silent.
"Jealousy is an ugly look, Nadia." Rosa moved her hands out of the way as Valeria and Alba placed our food in front of us.
"It's not jealousy." Her jaw clenched. "Trust me."
"What is it then?" Elias fixed his gaze on her.
She scoffed.
Is she jealous of me?
Why?
I'm nothing compared.
"I'm sure she didn't mean anything by it." I gave her a strained smile.
"I didn't. I was just remarking on how well you've acclimated."
"See." I flicked my eyes to Elias with a gentle exhale. "It wasn't anything. Nadia has been nothing but nice to me." Valeria placed a plate filled with Mole Poblano in front of me, and I swallowed the tightness in my throat. "Gracias, Valeria."
The staff moved about the table, putting everyone's food in front of them, the rich aroma causing my stomach to growl.
Rosa bowed her head for prayer, making the sign of the cross. Elias and Javier did the same as Nadia and I stared at one another in a silent battle of wills.
Does she hate me?
Does she know?
How can she, unless Rosa…
She wouldn't.
Would she?
I tucked my chin to my chest, giving in to her dominating stare.
"Amen," they said in unison.
I raised my head as though I'd joined them and gave her a weak smile, her focus set dead ahead on me.
Rosa picked up her fork. "How was your outing, Nadia?"
Nadia's stiff as Botox expression morphed into a phony smile. "Well, Laura brought her Fendi instead of a Birkin and then tried to blame it on her butler." She laughed while the table remained silent. "I doubt she even owns a Hermès item."
What's a Hermès?
Is it a reticulated python?
"And how is Patrice? I know her daughter was sick with…what was it? Lyme's Disease?"
"No. That was Lydia's daughter, Carla."
"Right. Right." Rosa bit into her food as I shoved mine around.
A soft nudge hit my right ankle.
My stomach churned as though I were on a busy sea, the oceans angry with my sins—my focus down on the food I couldn't eat.
Don't make me look at you.
Another nudge moved my foot.
Elias and I shared glances amidst Rosa and Nadia's rapid Spanish exchange, my conflicted mind catching every other word.
"What did you do today, Grace? Besides sifting through old photographs?"
My pulse erupted in my ears. I sat up straight, my name foreign to my ears. "I…um…" Tingles traveled up my spine and neck, settling into my hairline. "Not much."
She giggled before placing a dainty bite into her mouth. "Sounds difficult."
"Yeah." I frowned, my brows scrunched together as the General flashed in my mind's eye. "May I be excused? I'm not feeling so well."
"Nadia…" Elias growled.
"What?" She lifted her wine glass and reclined in her seat with a nonchalant laugh. "Can't I talk with her? Is she so off-limits that only you can know about her?"
"You know that's not true."
"Nadia, please." Rosa placed a hand on Nadia's arm.
"I'm just curious, is all. You all seem so smitten with a girl I don't even know." She sipped her wine and exhaled. "I mean, you're so busy I barely get time with you to make wedding plans, but she…" Her finger jabbed in my direction. "She gets to sit in your office and reminisce with you."
I winced as the photographs flashed through my mind. Tucking my hands into my lap, I hunched my shoulders and bit into my cheek.
"That was business."
"And what kind of business requires the opinion of this girl?"
I glanced at Javier, his little jab swarming back to the surface. He put a bite into his mouth as if there wasn't a nuclear bomb about to explode at the table.
Is that how he gets through these dinners?
I cut a large bite and plopped it into my mouth, busying myself like him.
"What's gotten into you lately?" Elias dropped his fork to his plate. “Are wedding plans causing you too much stress? Should we delay it?"
Mole traveled down my throat, and I coughed into my hand before grabbing my napkin and covering my mouth.
Nadia's eyes widened. "You don't mean that." Her hand landed on his arm as she sidled up to him, her demeanor shifting to feigned sadness that had me raising a brow. "Maybe I just need a night out with you. You've been so busy. I feel like I'm sharing you."
Javier gulped his wine, then exhaled as he bared his teeth, turning the glass to the side and examining it. "Better get used to it."
Nadia glared and shared it with me as she turned her focus back to Elias, her hand clamped around his arm. "How about a short getaway? We could go to the villa by the beach and soak in the sun."
I savored the rich flavors exploding on my taste buds, waiting for his response as though I were eavesdropping.
Elias wiped his mouth with his cloth napkin, his eyes darting towards me and then to his plate, dropping the used napkin. "I'm busy." He picked up his glass and swallowed the contents.
Tension oozed into the space between us like the thick mole sliding down my throat as Nadia bristled. My lungs squeezed the oxygen from my chest, and my stomach twisted.
Won't this dinner end already?
How can he subject me to this?
How could I listen to her discuss vacation plans or wedding arrangements when my lips still held the memory of his touch?
Why did he insist on me being here?
Valeria cleared the table, including my plate, as Elias rose from his seat. "Mamá, let's get you to bed?"
He tucked her arm into his and helped her to her feet, then walked her through the door as Javier stretched his tattooed hands over his head.
Nadia sat back in her seat, her body jittery as she watched him walk away.
"I'm going to bed." I stood, my chair screeching on the floor.
"Why don't you stay? We were going to have drinks on the patio."
"I'm good." I shook my head. "I really don't feel that well."
"For what it's worth, I'm sorry. He's always so gruff and preoccupied." Nadia's smile turned lopsided.
"Good night." I returned her smile and stepped out of the room.
"He'll lose interest in her, just like all of his toys."
My stomach clenched, my guards in tow as I rushed up the stairs to my room.
Except his other playthings, no doubt, still had a pulse—their outcome a stark contrast to mine.