Chapter 20
CHAPTER TWENTY
Eric woke with a certainty that everything was right in his world.
He rolled over, not sure why he felt that way until he came fully awake, blinking at the elegant hotel room.
Nikolett’s hotel room.
He stretched out an arm, reaching for her.
After they had sex, he’d carried her to bed and fallen asleep with her curled against him.
Nikolett wasn’t there.
Maybe it wasn’t surprising, given that it was now early evening. He wasn’t normally someone who napped away an afternoon, but given how shitty he’d slept the past few nights, it didn’t surprise him that he’d fallen asleep.
Still, passing out after sex was a cliché, and she deserved better.
Sitting, he tipped his head side to side to pop his neck as he looked around. No Nikolett in the bedroom.
He checked the bathroom and when she wasn’t there, he took a moment to jump in the shower to rinse off before heading out to find her. Since all he had were the pajama pants he had been kidnapped in, he opted for a towel.
Nikolett was sitting at a small desk in the corner of the living room. She was dressed, with her hair pulled back in a rather severe-looking bun. Like a sexy librarian.
He needed a phone or a computer and an Internet connection so they could get their hands on a checklist and start really digging into one another’s kinks.
His girl was deeply submissive, but it took her a long time to get there.
Once he did, she’d probably agree to anything. He needed to go in with a plan.
He knew she heard him open the door, because he’d seen her go still, and heard the pause in the click of keys, but she didn’t turn around.
Maybe this was some sort of power play. Perhaps after submitting sexually, she would have to rebound by being overtly dominant and in control outside of the bedroom.
He was more than willing to play whatever game this was. Eric leaned one bare shoulder against the wall and waited.
Nikolett finished typing, closed the lid on her laptop, and finally turned around.
Her face was bare, the subtle but elegant makeup she’d had on before washed away. She wore slim-cut pants and an oversized sweater.
And the cast.
Eric straightened from the wall as he noticed that ridiculous neon green cast strapped to her leg over the pants.
Fuck.
“Nikki, did I hurt you?”
He rushed across the room, kneeling in front of her.
It must’ve been when he pulled her by the ankles. She said her leg was healed, but he should have checked. He should have—
“No, no kneeling.” She snapped the words, but there was a thread of something that was almost desperation in her voice.
Nikolett shoved to her feet and stepped around him, her gate uneven, thanks to the thick sole of the cast, plus a curved walking piece that was strapped to the bottom of it.
“No kneeling?” Slowly, Eric rose to his feet, mind racing as he tried to figure out what was wrong. Had he hurt her when he knelt to lick her pussy?
Maybe she was feeling guilty for kidnapping him. When they brought him in, Grigoris had put him on his knees.
“Nikolett, look at me.”
She hesitated, back to him, shoulders hunched defensively.
When she didn’t turn, he went to her.
And when he wrapped his arms around her from behind, she sagged against him, almost going limp in his arms.
Anxiety spiked through him. He was an asshole for falling asleep when something had clearly gone wrong.
Heart in his throat, Eric started to pick her up, but she panicked, stumbling away from him. She would have fallen if he’d had shorter arms and hadn’t been able to reach out and grab her.
Not releasing her, Eric stretched out one foot, hooked the leg of a dining chair, and pulled it over.
He pushed her down into the chair, then brought the other one over, positioning it to face her.
Nikolett sat tall and stiff in her chair. This time, it didn’t make her seem regal, but fragile. Defensive.
They sat in silence for a moment, but she was looking at his nose rather than meeting his gaze. “What happened?”
Finally, Nikolett’s gaze met his. “I kissed someone else.”
Eric absorbed that. He hadn’t seen it coming, hadn’t been able to brace the way he had for the punch this morning. “When?”
“Last night.”
Eric clenched his hands together, unable to name the emotion, or emotions, currently gripping him.
“One of your potential husbands?”
She shifted. “You remember I said that?”
Eric shot her a look. “Yes, Nikolett, I remember standing in the rain telling you I love you and then you told me you were interviewing people you planned to marry.”
Her gaze narrowed. “I remember things too, like when you fucked me in Italy, then tried to pretend it didn’t count because your cock wasn’t actually inside me. Six months later, you forced me to marry your brother!”
“Are you going to bring that up every time we fight?” he snarled.
“Only until you do something that’s an even better example of what an asshole you are.”
They were both yelling, leaning forward in their chairs.
He wanted to kiss her and then fuck her hard and fast until she forgot other men even existed.
Eric surged to his feet. “Who, Nikolett? Who was it?”
Nikolett jumped up too, wobbling a little. “It doesn’t matter.”
He barked out a hard laugh. “Really?” He swallowed a snarl. “Who’s on your husband list?”
“That is none of your business.”
“Don’t pull this aloof, detached bullshit with me. Not today.”
Her expression faltered.
Eric took a calming breath.
“I love you,” he said after a tense silence. “I love you, and that’s why it’s my business who you’re planning to marry, and who you kissed last night.”
She looked to the side, swallowed. “So it’s over then.”
“Over? I just told you I love you.”
“And I just told you I kissed someone else last night.”
“And now you’re going to tell me who it was.”
“Why? What will you do to them? Kill them?” She shook her head.
“I’m not going to kill them. I’m going to smile at them.”
“You’re…what?”
Eric smiled. Not the way he normally smiled at Nikolett. The way he’d smiled at Maxim and Iacob this morning.
Nikolett blinked and swallowed. “Oh. That smile.”
“Yes. That smile.” Eric took a step toward Nikolett. “Who?” Another step. “Did. You. Kiss?” He took one step for each word in the sentence, and she matched him with a step in retreat.
“No one you know,” she said again, but her voice wasn’t as firm.
“Didn’t ask if I knew him.” He thought back to the night on the balcony. If it was no one he knew… “The cookie guy?”
She didn’t react, which for her was confirmation.
“You were going to recruit him so you could marry him.” Eric tried to hold onto his anger. It was better than the sick feeling, like he was once more losing everything.
Nikolett sagged, head down, arms crossed over her midsection. “I had dinner with him last night.”
“And he’s the one you plan to marry?”
They were going to have to figure out her marriage, the logistics of their relationship… A million other things. He knew that and accepted it. But he wasn’t ready for it now.
“No. No, not really. But at least I felt something with him.”
That hit harder than anything else she’d said and Eric stepped back, putting distance between himself and her words.
“I tried once before, with someone else from the list. Someone from my territory. He was kind, smart, and caring. But he wanted to be in love with his spouses.”
Eric took a slow breath. “And you knew you couldn’t love him?”
She nodded.
“But the man last night…the cookie guy. You could love him?”
He had no right to feel this way—like he was breaking into a thousand pieces. Nikolett would never be his alone. The rules of their society insisted that even if they could find a way to deal with their respective positions, they’d need a third.
Unless he did what he’d done with—
“It didn’t end well, so it doesn’t matter.”
Her words yanked him away from the half-finished thought.
“What happened? Nikki, did he hurt you?”
“No. He was very chivalrous.”
“You want chivalrous?”
Fuck. Throwing her over his shoulder and then tossing her onto the bed probably wasn’t chivalrous. That was barbarous.
“No. I should want it, but…no. And what happened…I messed up, not him.” She stuttered to a stop, her halting, unfinished sentences unlike her normal confident speech. “But I should have…I should have told you.”
The last words were barely audible, and Eric finally realized why she was hunched in on herself like that. She wasn’t breaking up with him or trying to gently tell him he was too late. This was about her.
“Nikki, you have nothing to be ashamed of.”
She flinched.
“You and I weren’t together yesterday. You didn’t cheat on me.”
She let out a wet laugh. “Didn’t I? Because I’ll never love anyone the way I love you.”
Relief swamped him, but Eric didn’t have time to revel in it because she looked like she was breaking apart. Eric went to her, wrapping his arms around her.
“Nikki, it’s okay.” He hugged her tight, as if he could press his love for her into her skin.
“I should have said something, before we did anything. I should have told you. I was just focused on finally… On seeing if it could really happen.”
Her words were muffled against his chest, but he understood.
He kissed the top of her head. “I thought this was your way of telling me that maybe you didn’t love me anymore. Or at least not the way you used to. Or that you were already planning to marry someone else and I was going to be your mistress.”
“What?” She leaned back to frown up at him. “If I didn’t love you, why would I go to the trouble of kidnapping you?”
“I really need you to talk to Elijah at some point.” He kissed her forehead. “You have nothing to be ashamed of.”
“I feel too many things right now and they’re all a jumble in my head. The only emotion that feels clear, feels right is…loving you.”
Eric hugged her, rocking her gently side to side as she calmed.
When she stepped back, wiping her face with the heels of her hands, he let her go.