Chapter 44
“Can we stay and hang out with Aunt Camille?” Frannie pleads, looking moments away from bursting into tears.
Her twin nods, Bea’s expression far more restrained as she reaches out to place a hand on Astrid’s arm. “Please Mom, we never get to see her.”
Astrid gives me a look that silently asks, “Hey, are you okay with these gremlins pestering you with a million questions?”
I give her a small nod in reply.
Honestly, dealing with the twins’ questions is preferable to the grilling I’m likely to get from my best friend after I’ve spent the last month dodging her texts, only to turn around and beg her to have lunch with me.
I ended up going to her place for lunch, and the twins are off from school this week so they’re here too.
I know I reached out to Astrid for emotional support, but after my encounter with River, I’m having second thoughts.
Now I have tell her that I’ve not only started being courted by a pack, but one of the members is my boss and we fucked right before I came over.
She’s going to strangle me when she finds out that I’ve been keeping secrets from her, but I don’t think she’ll commit homicide in front of her kids.
“Alright, you have fifteen minutes. But after that, Aunt Camille and I need to have a private conversation.”
The twins flash matching grins of glee. “Thank you!”
Frannie plops down on the couch next to me, leaning over to sniff me with a frown. “Why don’t you smell like anything?”
“Francesca Marie, it’s not polite to talk about how someone smells,” Astrid chides, giving her a stern mom look.
I shrug, unbothered. “I use scent neutralizer. Now that I’m an omega, I smell like a coffee shop if I don’t use it, and some people find that unpleasant. It’s common courtesy to wear it at work and when you go out in bigger public settings.”
The preteen nods sagely. “Oh. Makes sense. So when I reveal as an omega, I’ll have to use scent neutralizer too?”
Bea scoffs. “You’re not an omega. If anything, I bet you’re an alpha.”
Her sister scowls in horror. “What? Eww, no way! You’re just jealous because I’m going to be an omega and get spoiled while you’re going to be a boring, basic beta.”
“Enough,” Astrid says firmly, cutting off their argument with a glare. “We won’t have any clue what your designation is until you’re old enough for the testing. So lay off this nonsense.”
The twins give their mother matching sullen looks that say as soon as they’re out of her presence, they’ll be arguing again.
I’d laugh, but I remember what it was like to be their age. Designations and revealing were on everyone’s brains, at the same level as wondering how big your boobs were going to get or being weirded out by new body hair.
At least they won’t have to wait to reveal to prepare themselves. Genetic tests have such a high success rate once puberty begins, they’ll likely know what to expect.
Thank god designation science wasn’t advanced enough to do that back when I was a preteen. As much as I hate being a medical anomaly, enduring knowing I’m genetically an omega but not revealing would’ve been far worse.
“I gotta tell you, so far, I liked being a ‘boring’ beta a lot more than being an omega,” I say with a sigh. “And some of the coolest people I know are betas.”
Bea narrows her eyes at me. “You’re just saying that because Mom is a beta. We all know being an omega is the best.”
“Trust me, I’m not just saying that. Permission to speak freely?” I ask, turning to Astrid. I need to check that she’s cool with me telling her kids the truth, even if it might be a little upsetting.
“Yeah, go for it. Maybe you can get them to stop this nonsense,” Astrid grumbles.
“Great. Alright girls, you want to know how great being an omega is?”
They both nod, though they should know by now that I’m about to ruin their fantasies if I ask their mom for permission to say something.
“Well, to start, you mentioned my scent. When you’re an omega, everyone’s scent is amplified.
Everything is more intense. Yes, for a select few, their scent will be amazing, but the rest are either neutral, or a lot of times, unpleasant.
Sometimes I feel sick being in the same room as someone with an incompatible scent. ”
Frannie’s pale brows scrunch. “Do we smell bad to you?” she asks, scooting back from me a bit.
I shake my head, smiling to reassure her. The twins both smell a bit like cookies, but their scents aren’t strong at all at their age and may not change if they’re betas. “You both smell totally fine.”
“Whew, okay,” she moves back so her small thigh is pressing against mine, staring at me to continue.
I take a moment to decide exactly how harsh I want to be. I don’t want to scare them to the point that they’ll dread the thought of being an omega.
“I didn’t think about it a ton as a beta, but omegas are also discriminated against frequently.
Things have changed since I was young, and omega rights have expanded, but there are still a lot of people out there that see omegas as lesser than other designations.
They think they’re needier and more fragile, so people won’t hire omegas for a lot of jobs. ”
Bea scowls. “But that’s illegal! They can’t do that.”
I sigh, appreciating her indignance and hating that I have to be the one to burst that bubble for her.
Thankfully, Astrid steps in for me.
“Even if laws prohibit something, there are people who will find a way to circumvent that. It’s not fair at all and you have every right to be upset about it. I don’t want you to blindly accept that. But Aunt Camille is right to be honest with you about the downsides.”
“Oh.” Frannie gives me a sad look. “I’m sorry you’re an omega. That sucks.”
I resist the urge to laugh, because she’s voicing how I’ve felt since I went into heat. “It’s not all bad. I just want you to know that every designation has its pros and cons and whatever you girls turn out to be, no designation is better than the others.”
“What about omegas getting to be in packs? What about heats? Mom said you went into heat and got to do it with hot strangers.” Bea’s eyes sparkle with interest.
“Oh boy, uh, well…” My eyes dart over to Astrid, not sure how to handle the topic with her preteens.
She snorts, clearly used to the twins asking her about this sort of thing. “Aunt Camille isn’t going to talk about that. Heats are private.”
“Aww, damn,” Frannie says.
“Language,” her mom reminds her with a frown.
“You’ll learn more about heats when you get a little older, but as far as packs go, anyone can join a pack.”
“Even betas?” Bea asks, sounding doubtful.
I nod, smiling. “Absolutely. There’s a beta in the pack that I’m—” My eyes go wide as I cut myself off, and Astrid gapes at me. I clear my throat. “Uh, yeah. betas can be part of packs.”
“You know what, I think question time is over.”
The twins groan, but Astrid shakes her head. “I have something important I need to talk to Aunt Camille about, and she needs to go back to work soon. I promise next time she comes for dinner, I’ll let you stay up later.”
So much for using them as a buffer.
The girls head off upstairs despite their disappointment, and I’m left alone with my best friend, who glares daggers at me. “You’re seeing a pack?”
I grimace. “Yes. I’m so sorry I didn’t tell you. I was waiting to make sure it was going to go somewhere, and it’s been… complicated.”
“Complicated how?” she asks, arching a blonde brow at me.
I groan. “My boss is one of the alphas and I thought he hated me, but we hooked up in his office earlier today after he confessed he wanted me and I’m worried about him changing his mind or getting fired if someone finds out.”
Astrid’s mouth hangs open, and she blinks a few times before getting up and leaving the room without another word.
Is she so mad at me she can’t look at me right now? Dammit, I’m a terrible friend.
“I’m sorry!” I call out after her.
A moment later, she returns with a box of cookies in her hand. She takes one out and passes it over to me. “Alright, start from the beginning.”
Astrid doesn’t hold back on asking me every question under the sun, not allowing me to spare any details on my whole omega saga.
When it’s all out in the open, I feel raw. Saying aloud all my hopes and concerns to my best friend, someone who has been with me through the toughest parts of my life, is cathartic. As is how she reacts to everything I say, validating the cacophony of emotions I’ve been dealing with.
I feel silly for not telling her sooner. I only wish Astrid knew what I should do next. Beyond speaking with River as soon as possible to figure out what we’re going to do about our situation at work, and ask if he’s sure he wants to be in a romantic relationship with me.
Like the supportive best friend she is, Astrid insists anyone would be head over heels for me because I’m amazing. There’s no question in her mind River meant what he said.
It’s clear the tangled web of pack relationships and my struggles with being an omega are beyond her realm of expertise, but that doesn’t stop Astrid from attempting to talk things through with me. And it helps. It’s rough, but just the act of discussing it makes it a little less daunting.
Butterflies kick up inside me as I ride the elevator to back to my office, imagining being alone with River again once I’m done with my call. Wondering if he’ll look at me the same way he did earlier. Remembering the way his mouth tasted and the way his hands gripped me so possessively.
I should go directly back to my desk and use the thirty minutes before my call with DesigNation to finish prepping, but thoughts of River have me making my way to his office instead.
When I go to knock on his door, it swings open and I step back before I tumble into the person on the other side.
The beta in the doorway says something to River over his shoulder that sounds like, “it’s a shame,” but I’m not certain, because someone down the hall coughs loudly at the same time.