Chapter 21
MATTEO
After getting our things together, Seth escorts us to the old bottle factory.
Everything’s moving so fast, I can hardly keep up.
One minute I thought Alexei was stealing from Gage.
Then I discovered magic was real. That I could be attracted to men.
Then I was possessed by a serial killer.
And to top it all off, I had visions of being inside Finnegan’s body, and Cody is acting like I might wind up being a psychopath.
I don’t know what to focus on first, but seems like the only thing to do is keep pushing ahead and try to survive whatever the hell comes next.
“Look at this little make-out pad,” Seth observes as we arrive at the office Alexei fixed up for the rituals we were supposed to perform to find out what happened to his brother.
“Yeah.” Alexei glances around uncomfortably as he sets his bag on a chair.
I’m waiting for Seth to pry, but instead, he asks, “Malcom reply to your text yet?”
Not for the first time, Alexei retrieves his phone from his back pocket and checks. “No, but he’s still got five before he gets off work.”
“Okay, then I’ll go ahead and set up the circle of protection here in case we have uninvited guests. The other guys should be here in maybe half an hour, after they get their things and food.” During their chat in the church, they agreed they would camp out with us until this evening.
Seth sets up the circle of protection, spreading salt around the edges of the room. Once he’s finished, he settles into a similar position as Cody was in the pentagram, bowing like he’s about to pray. Gripping his necklace, he chants.
Alexei and I exchange glances, both of us smirking, and I’m trying to keep from laughing. I don’t want to disturb his work, but come on. What the hell is this shit?
When Seth finishes, he hops up. “You should be all set. I can step out, but you’ll need to break the circle for us to come in.”
“So the opposite of the one Brad made for me the night after Farras?” I ask.
“Look at you, already an expert.” He pats me on the back.
It’s apparent he’s trying to be playful. Not sure if it’s because we let him push on us or because he saw Alexei and me messing around, but since we left the church, he’s been more chill, not his usual assholey self.
There’s a ping, and we both turn to Alexei, who retrieves his phone, checking the screen.
“Malcom’s good for nine thirty.”
Relief sweeps through me. That’s gonna make this a hell of a lot easier. Although, nothing about any of this is really easy.
Seth’s shoulders relax. “Great.” There’s a stretch of silence before he says, “I’m gonna look around, find some rooms for us to use when the guys get here.
If you hear me holler, we’ve probably radically underestimated the Saints, they’ve come to kill us and maybe wipe out all humanity, who knows?
” He snickers—a nervous laugh, I figure—but Alexei and I just stare.
Though it’s surely on both our minds, it’s not helping to point it out.
“I’ll get to it, then. Give you some privacy.” He winks, like he thinks Alexei and I might pick up where we left off. Then he heads out, and we’re finally alone again. Seems like forever since that moment we shared at the church.
Would have been nice to stay in that moment a little longer. When I’m touching him, I’m not confused. I know exactly what I want. Our pleasure is all that matters. In the real world—if I can even call it that anymore—things are so much more complicated.
I study Alexei’s expression. “I can see it written all over your face again,” I say, which draws his attention. “Like the weight of the world is bearing down on you.”
“Sounds about right.” His lip curls into a smirk, then just as quickly returns to a frown.
My gaze pulls to the mattress. There’s a surprising sense of nostalgia about that first night. How nervous he was. My massage. My hard cock. His tight hole. His playfulness. And that desperate hunger to come inside him.
“Wild to think it hasn’t even been two weeks since we messed around here,” I say. “Something kind of romantic about it.” As soon as I say the words, I regret them. “I’m sorry. That was a real dick thing to say. That night was hell for you. Just please forget I said anything.”
“No. I won’t forget you said anything because you’re right. As fucked up as it was, there was something kind of romantic about it. If anyone should feel guilty about it, it’s me, after what happened to you.”
I approach him, rest my hands against his arms. “For the last time: I chose to do that, knowing there could be risks. That’s not on you.
And I’m still here. We both are. That’s the only thing that matters.
” I raise my hand to his cheek, run my thumb across his flesh.
“So,” I say, “more importantly, you think there was something romantic about that night?”
“Yeah, it was the first night I ever experienced anything with a guy…or felt anything like that with a guy. A guy I’ve been getting hung up on recently.”
God, that’s got me smiling, and his lips perk up too.
But once again, reality creeps back in. “Tonight might not go the way the Sinners planned.”
“I’m sure everyone’s thinking the same thing.”
“I know we’re doing the right thing, but it’s so…fucked up, to think that tonight…”
“…could be our last night?”
I nod.
“I hear you, but I can’t let myself believe that. I refuse. I have to stick around for my family. I can’t add any more to their pain.” There’s determination in his gaze, but I can see the fear too. “But…” He steps closer. “In case it is our last night, we should make the best of it.”
He moves swiftly, his lips mashing against mine. As he wraps his arms around me, his tongue slips between my lips. It’s all so fucking electrifying, goddamn lifegiving—another reason why tonight can’t be the end.
Just like at the church, I’m surprised how easy it is to lose myself in Alexei.
Lose track of time and space…of what we must do tonight.
We’re a series of kisses, licks, nips as I soak up as much of him as I can.
We’re alternating between kisses and stripping, yet it doesn’t feel as messy as it has in the past. We fall into a rhythm, even our fumbles a part of our dance.
And soon we’re nude on the air mattress, Alexei beneath me, our hard cocks pressing against each other as we thrust. I growl into his mouth and feel his smile spread against my face.
“Growling? You’re just hungry for my ass right now, aren’t you?”
“Yes,” I say without hesitation.
“Then take it. It’s yours.”
Mine? Why does him saying that feel so fucking good? Makes me that much harder?
“Please, Matteo. I need you inside me.”
His words make me groan as I remember something.
“What?” he asks.
“I left the lube in my bag.” I start to roll off him to get it, but he hooks his arms and legs around me, locking me in place.
“No, don’t go,” he says, and there’s a desperation to his words, as though the thought of me leaving him for the few seconds it would take to reach my bag is unbearable.
“I’ll be right back. I promise I don’t want to miss this ass.”
“I’m not an expert, but there are other things you can use as lube.”
His words catch me off guard. “You mean spit?”
He nods.
“It’s not gonna be as slick as lube. I assume you realize that.”
“I’m not saying I might not change my mind, but I’d be curious to try. I like the idea of it being all-Matteo inside me.”
“All-Matteo?” I chuckle, but now that he’s expressed his interest, I admit I’m intrigued.
“So you’ll tell me if it’s uncomfortable or if it doesn’t feel good?”
His brows furrow. “Trust me. You’ll be able to tell. I’m definitely not faking anything when we’re together.”
My chest swells with pride as I gaze into those beautiful blue eyes, which up close like this, I can see the specks of white shining within.
“Okay, we’ll see, but one word from you, and I’m out, and we’re grabbing the lube.”
He grins—no, beams—like I’m fulfilling a secret wish, which encourages me that much more.
As he relaxes his limbs, I crawl down to his ass, which he displays for me. I offer a few spits, running my finger along the rim, pushing in. Then I spit in my palm, rubbing it over my shaft before pushing my cock up against that tight hole.
Given what we’re about to do, I figure Alexei would be nervous, like he was that first night, but instead of hesitation or worry, there’s an eagerness in his expression as I push the head in. He closes his eyes, gritting his teeth.
“You good?” I ask.
“It’s just a little pressure. But stay right there. I want this. I fucking need it.”
I stay still until he urges me on, and then I inch my way in steadily, keeping my eyes on his expression, wanting to catch even the subtlest of hints at discomfort.
When I finally manage to get my cock all the way in, it’s a tight fit, my cock swelling with excitement inside him. He was right: there’s something delicious about knowing it’s just Alexei and me, with only my spit between us.
I lean down, resting my forearms on either side of him. “How’s that?”
“Just right,” he whispers as he opens his eyes. “Just keep it right there. Let me get used to it like this.”
“Just like your ass is mine, my cock’s yours. Do whatever you want with it.”
His Adam’s apple shifts as he swallows. He reaches up and rests his hand against my cheek. He studies my face for a few moments, making me curious.
“What are you thinking?” I ask.
“Honestly? How much I was dreading having a cock inside me, and now how it’s like I was made for yours.” He snickers. “Stupid, right?”
“No, it’s not.”
His expression turns serious, and I kiss that beautiful mouth, tasting him, reveling in this moment of being so fucking close.
It’s not just his ass that feels like it was made for me, but his mouth, his tongue, even his goddamn smell.
I nibble at his jaw, tasting down his warm neck, worshipping his body.
“Okay, try to move,” he says. “A little. Very subtly.”
I obey, extra cautious with my movements. He moans again, and I recognize that moan from the other times we’ve spent together. It’s not from pain. It hits my ears like a song, makes me even harder.
“Oh, you fucking liked that, didn’t you?” he asks, obviously feeling me swell in him.
“Fuck yeah.”
He begs for another thrust, and I give it to him. Then another.
His mouth drops open, and he gasps. As he rolls his head back, he places a hand on my chest, the other on my side, gripping on.
I ease my cock back and forth, opening that ass that he gave to me so willingly, enjoying every twist in his expression, every curse he utters as I slide against his prostate just right.
When his body’s primed for me, I manage to make broader movements, picking up the pace, his ass gripping my shaft, massaging my cock.
As we speed up, once again, I find myself lost in the passion.
I’m not just fucking a body. We’re fucking each other’s souls.
In the short time we’ve known each other, we’ve shared more with each other than with anyone else.
We know those darkest parts, and neither of us has turned away.
In fact, he’s begged me to look at him. And when I look in those eyes, I don’t see judgment or fear.
I don’t feel like a monster. Or maybe like it doesn’t matter if I am one, since he doesn’t give a fuck.
“Give it to me good,” he begs once we’re really going. Even when, despite how chilly the room is, we’ve worked up so much body heat that we’re both sweating.
I lean back, hook my arms under his thighs, and really give it to him, watching his body shift about beneath me. Precum beads from the head of his cock, dripping onto his abdomen. And I can’t help myself. Resting one of his legs down, I wipe my hand through it and have a taste.
Oh, it’s fucking heaven.
“Yes, this angle,” he says. “Just like this.”
Keeping his left leg in the crook of my arm, I grip his shaft in my right hand, now covered in my saliva, pumping him as I keep fucking.
He locks eyes with me, moans again, and I drink it all up since I know this might be the last chance either of us ever has to really enjoy these bodies…
this life. I lean over him, pistoning my hips as I jack him.
“Come on,” I say. “Come for me. I want to see you shoot all over these sexy abs.”
The thought, combined with watching how he’s writhing beneath me, is so overwhelming that I feel a jolt rush through me. I grit my teeth.
“Come on, I’m getting too close,” I warn him.
“Shoot in me first. I want it. Please, I want to shoot after you come in me.”
It’s like his desire pulls it right from me. There’s a rush, and my hips slam in quick succession against his ass. I call out, struggle to stifle the sound, as it’s like an explosion of sensation through me.
“Fuck yeah,” Alexei says, and I keep thrusting through my high, delirious in the sensation until I see him shoot across his abs.
My body pushes me through a few more thrusts before releasing me from this primal state.
I set his leg down, leaning over him, resting my forearms at his sides, offering kisses, my cock still buried inside him, his cum against my abdomen.
We exchange wet, tongue-filled kisses as we descend from the high, reveling in what we have left of the experience. Clinging desperately to this amazing thing while we still can. Just a few more moments where it’s only the two of us, existing outside our past and present…and definitely the future.