Chapter 14 #2
"Probably." She chuckled softly, but then her expression turned serious. "You need to think it through."
"Yeah, I'm trying. But you're the voice of reason here."
She wiped her fingers on a napkin. "Ultimately, it's up to you what you do. I'm happy with my decision to be with Jackson, but I had reasons to stay tied to this world. You don't. You have no blood connection to the family, no obligations. This choice is bigger for you."
"You're my best friend, practically my sister. That makes me connected. Maybe not by blood…" I murmured.
"But still sort of the same," Elena agreed with a small nod.
I looked at Jackson, who'd been silent throughout our conversation. "What do you think?"
He seemed surprised I'd asked. "Not sure my opinion matters much here."
"It does to me."
Jackson set down his coffee, his dark brown eyes meeting mine.
"Sometimes when you find the person you think might be the one, it's worth taking a risk.
Just make sure you're sure. Don't do it because you're caught up in the moment or because you want to believe in something.
Do it because you genuinely think it's worth whatever comes after. "
The sincerity in his voice made me smile. This was a man who'd seen darkness, who'd made hard choices, who understood the weight of commitment in a dangerous world.
A man who'd saved our lives and been there in our darkest moment. He was as much a brother to me now as Elena was a sister. He'd endured something traumatic, and that created unique bonds.
"How did you know?" I asked. "With Elena. How did you know it was worth it?"
Jackson's gaze shifted to Elena, and something soft passed over his features. "Because the thought of not having her in my life was worse than any risk that came with keeping her there."
Elena reached across the table and squeezed his hand. The gesture was simple, but the emotion behind it was one I hoped I could one day have.
Love. Something I'd only allowed myself to feel for few people. Something I wasn't sure I'd ever felt for a man. Men were dangerous in my eyes, users, liars, cheaters.
But Eric… yes, he was a liar, but was it in a negative way? Everyone believed it to be for a good reason, even him.
I thought about the way he'd looked at me this morning. About how he'd remembered my favorite order after four years. About the promises in his eyes when he'd said he wouldn't disappear again.
But I also thought about the lies, the half-truths, and the danger that came with his world.
"Can you drop me home?" I asked quietly. "Or back to my car?"
"I'll organize to have your car brought to your building," Jackson said, already pulling out his phone. "We'll drop you home. Just give Elena your car keys."
The drive back to my apartment was quiet, each of us lost in our own thoughts. Elena held my hand in the backseat, my rock in this storm of emotions and thoughts. It reminded me of when we were kids, when Anna would comfort us after a particularly bad day at school or a fight.
When we pulled up outside my building, Elena hugged me tight. "Whatever you decide, I'm here. You know that, right?"
"I know," I whispered into her shoulder.
Jackson walked me to my door despite my protests, his professional instincts clearly not allowing for any other option. Or maybe it was a remnant of his need to look out for us both when we became kidnap victims together.
At my apartment entrance, he paused.
"For what it's worth, I think he cares about you. Given what Elena's told me, that's not nothing."
"But is it enough?" I asked, not really expecting an answer.
"Only you can decide that." He nodded once and headed back toward the elevator.
Inside my apartment, I locked the door and leaned against it, my phone heavy in my hand. Grayson had said Eric had asked him to pass along my number. I hadn't taken him up on it, but maybe, maybe I needed it now. Needed to reach out to him.
Not yet. I wanted to decompress before diving into that mess again.
I walked to my bedroom, peeling off my work clothes and changing into soft pajamas. The sheets still smelled faintly of Eric's cologne from this morning, a ghost of what we'd shared before everything became a complete shit-show.
What a mess. How had I found myself wrapped up in this life? Sure, I knew being by Elena's side came with risks, but this, this was a bit more than that.
Eric was a big player in his family. With an equally big target on his back.
And he wanted me, even still. A part of me felt chuffed and thrilled at being the interest of someone so powerful, but the other side knew the danger that came with it.
My phone buzzed. For a wild second, I thought it might be Eric somehow, but it was just a text from Jackson saying my car would be delivered in an hour or two.
I brushed my teeth, washed my face, went through all the mundane motions of getting ready for bed. But sleep felt impossible. My mind kept replaying the night. Eric's face when I'd confronted him in the alley, Sofia's knowing eyes, Grayson's careful consideration, Jackson's quiet wisdom.
I climbed into bed, staring at the dark screen of my phone. Maybe I needed to talk to him now. Because sleep didn't seem possible otherwise.