Chapter 28
CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
Jude
M orning dawned with a silvery tint to the clouds, then the sun painted a cranberry sky as it rose.
So sue me if the world looked brighter. For the first time in weeks but more like months, I’d spent days thinking about something other than loss. I’d spent them thinking about Jess.
And last night?
Last night, I’d gone to bed with the taste of her on my lips and the memory of her body against mine seared into my mind. I’d had a glimpse of heaven, and it’d given me a kind of hope I’d not dared to feel in years.
I was still grieving my grandmother, but I’d been grieving. In some ways, it felt like I’d spent the last half a decade mourning losses and walking in the hazy dusk that is grief.
Until…
It sounded so stupid—like a fairytale or something—but the assignment with Jess had woken me up. Being shoved into her space, touching her hand when we posed as a couple… it’d served as the slap across my face and forced my mind to step into the sunlight.
“You are having some serious thoughts, aren’t you, big fella?” Kenny’s grin could be heard from a mile away.
I turned with my coffee-filled mug and eyed him where he stood just inside the break room.
“Not gonna tell me? Fine. I’ll just have to guess.” He tapped his chin in a poor actor’s rendering of a thinking man, then he snapped. “I know. You’re thinking about kissing Pop in a dark corner of the hotel last night?—”
In the split-second between when I realized he somehow knew what’d happened to the words exiting his loose lips, I’d slipped my coffee onto the nearby counter and got in his face enough that he knew not to finish the sentence.
“Do not say another word and do not repeat what you just said.”
Amusement flickered across his face. “No kissing and telling then, eh? How chivalrous.”
“What did he say?” Luc asked from the doorway. “Whatever it is, I’m sure it’s merited, but could we ease up, gentlemen?”
I shoved Kenny away and he winked at me, evidently not at all fazed by my threats.
“It’s fine. Beasty doesn’t realize that we all saw him and Jess kiss and make up last night when we left the ballroom and spotted them in their sexy little corner.”
The swallow of coffee went down hard. Kenny slapped my back as though that ever actually helped someone when they were sputtering against a bad drink.
“I would’ve thought you’d be happy about this, but somehow, you seem grumpier.” Kenny laughed and shared an amazed look with Luc.
Adam and Dorian filed into the room, as well. I greeted them both with nods and stepped farther away from the coffee maker so they could fuel up.
“What a nice little morning reunion,” Adam said, grinning at all of us.
“Damn, man, you look like you had a nice start to your day.” Kenny wiggled his brows.
I shoved the idiot, and Adam shook his head in disapproval. “None of that.”
Kenny shrugged, and Adam rolled his eyes.
“We were just hoping to get details on Beast’s evening.” There went the damn brows again.
Interest flashed over Adam’s face, but then he sent me a look while speaking to Kenny. “A story I’m sure he’s just itching to share with your gossipy butt.”
His expression said enough—he had something to tell me but not in front of the child. Luc ushered Kenny out of the room and Stone took a seat at the small table and sipped his coffee, wonderfully at ease.
“I saw Pop this morning. She seemed… I don’t know.” He and Stone exchanged glances.
“You saw her, too?” I asked Stone.
He nodded, his silence confirming Adam’s statement.
“Did she say anything?” I pressed, needing to understand his concern and get a sense of what might be going on with her.
Had she not been glad we’d kissed? Did she regret it?
Had I read everything completely wrong?
Wouldn’t be the first time…
“Nothing about you. She mostly talked about McKean and their plan today. It wasn’t like she was raging or anything, just seemed… subdued.”
I nodded, instantly understanding why this was notable. Jess Korbel was alive and buzzing with energy and beauty and life… describing her as subdued was like describing someone else as sad or angry and despondent. Jess was full of life, whether it was fury at me or excitement for her friends or focus for the mission.
My heart sank at the reality of what this might mean.
“You’re at the theater this morning, but after noon, you’re back at the resort, right? I think she’ll be at McKean’s door until four. Maybe you could check in.” He lifted a shoulder. “Not that it’s my business. But you know. I think it’s worth continuing to… bridge the gap between you.”
The flicker of a smile on his face echoed on Stone’s.
I grunted, acknowledging the suggestion. I wouldn’t take it as an insult that he assumed I might not talk to her. But nothing about the way I’d treated her the last few years made sense to anyone but the two of us, and even then, it was a stretch. For both of us.
Plus, they both knew I’d been grieving and how the weight of sadness made me even less likely to share my thoughts or speak my mind. And we were sitting here with the king of hiding out, so none of us would pretend we didn’t know isolating when things were hard came naturally.
The day dragged on slowly. If I was the type of person to care about celebrity, maybe it would’ve been a little fun. I did like what I knew of Jenna Halter, and since Cookie and Hijack had guarded her and spoke well of her, I felt reasonably sure she was a decent human. The other local celebrities were out in force—Bri Williamson, Miss Mayhem, Jamie Morris, Julian Grenier, and so many more. Plus, the town was downright flooded with tourists and film fest attendees. It was good for Silverton.
What was not good was knowing that Jess was guarding Jack McKean. Even I had a crush on McKean, and I didn’t get crushes. But the man was a fantastic actor and from what I’d heard from Bruce and others who knew him, a truly good dude.
He was also the kind of Hollywood pretty none of us, save maybe our beloved Jean-Luc, could compete with.
And was I competing? No. Only an idiot would imagine himself in competition with Jack McKean. That man would lose a hundred times over.
But also, only an idiot would fail to notice how beautiful Jess was, and so if Jack really wasn’t an idiot, he’d take notice. And, well, who could blame her for being a little taken by the millionaire, Oscar-winning dreamboat?
If it wouldn’t be incredibly insulting to her professionalism, I’d be worried. But she’d never cross that line.
Unless his animal magnetism and pheromones destroy all her good sense.
I mean honestly, I wouldn’t blame her. I saw Karrigan’s Muse and that depressing Irish one he won his Oscar for.
And more than that, I could be honest about what our relationship had been for so long. I didn’t know where we stood, and one messy conversation followed by a mind-bending kiss didn’t exactly erase everything lying wrecked by the choices of our past.
All the logic in the world didn’t keep me from internally pacing even as I stood still, alert to the potential threats and problems, communicating as needed with the team running overwatch from the office.
It didn’t stop me from feeling antsy whenever I caught sight of a petite brunette only to realize it wasn’t Jess .
And it definitely didn’t halt my bone-deep need to track her down and address whatever this was between us. I’d spent too long assuming things and, whether she wanted to admit it or not, so had she. We weren’t going forward like that, whether it meant we ended up as non-enemy coworkers or… something more.
I didn’t let myself entertain what that “something more” might be as I handed off my post to Tristan and beelined for the lobby. If Jess left her spot outside McKean’s door at the same time, we’d likely reach the hotel entrance around the same time. I could catch her, and we could figure this out… or start.
By the time I reached the ground floor, my heart was pounding. Anticipation and nerves, and maybe a few little visions of her sneering at me with hate in her eyes, had obliterated any confidence I had about the connection we’d made last night.
Then to top it off, I walked into the room to find her smiling up at Jack McKean, laughing as she nodded like she’d genuinely found his joke funny. It was the smile she gave her friends and people she felt safe with.
It was one she’d never given me.
When she glanced my way, her face dropped. She said a few more words to Jack, and Bruce replaced her as she broke away and squared her shoulders to me, looking like it took bravery and determination to talk to me. Far from the ease she’d just shown with Jack.
But the truth was, I couldn’t blame her.
As my neck prickled with heat and my heart thudded in my chest, I could only agree. I know how you feel, Pop.