Chapter 36
Tatum
My mouth is agape as I stare up at him in shock. “You gave it all up?” I mutter.
He nods. “When I told you that I loved you, Bambi, I meant it.” His words implore me to believe him and eradicate this distance I’ve put between us.
“No more killing?”
“I won’t lie to you. If someone comes after my brothers or you, I will kill again. I can’t control the side of me that will come out when someone I love is threatened. Please don’t make me promise?—”
“I get it,” I say, cutting him off. I nibble my bottom lip, debating how to ask my next question. “Did you kill Desire?”
His face blanks of all emotion. “Don’t ask questions you don’t want the answers to, baby,” he warns.
“I’m asking,” I push.
“Yes.”
“Did she suffer?”
“Not nearly as much as I wanted,” he growls.
“Why?”
“I showed her mercy because of who she was to my brothers. Her death has taken a toll on Omen.”
I sigh dejectedly. “I know.”
He frowns. “How?”
“I saw it in his eyes,” I admit.
“He’s… dealing,” he grits out.
“What about…” I take a deep breath and force myself to woman the fuck up. “What about Nexus?” Alex’s features harden, his nostrils flare in anger and I study him for a while, trying to get a read on his emotions but fail. “Alex, I need–”
“He’s alive,” he grits out through clenched teeth.
“Why?” I hedge.
He scoffs. “So are you mad he's alive and not dead now?” he snaps.
“Fuck you,” I fire back.
“Please do, baby, because my balls are as blue as your eyes right now.” I gape at him.
“Alex!” I scold.
“What?”
“That’s… no… you can’t say that shit.”
“Why the fuck not?”
“Because… you just can’t.”
“Why the fuck not? I’m not gonna hide it. I’m rock fucking hard for you right now, baby, and I want to sink my cock so deep inside your cunt that you can taste me on your tongue.”
I’m wet.
I can feel my arousal coating the inside of my thighs and now more than ever I’m grateful he gave me a pair of black sweats to borrow. My pussy is pulsing with need.
“Don’t play coy. You loved throwing that shit in Desire’s face about how I fucked you.” I feel the blush coating my cheeks.
“I did it to distract her.”
“Hmmm, so you gonna stand there and lie and say it didn’t give you satisfaction telling her I was your boyfriend and rubbing it in her face about me loving you?” I push my tongue into my cheek fighting not to laugh. Alex presses in closer until his front is plastered against me and sure enough, he’s rock fucking hard for me. “Admit it, you want me so stop playing hard to get, Bambi, and let me fuck you, then we can fight later.”
“Sex won’t solve anything.” I hate how breathy I sound.
“It would resolve this sexual tension between us so we could focus on actually arguing instead of picturing ways we could fuck.”
“Alex—”
He growls. “Fuck, fine, here are your options. One, I fuck you right here, now, and we can fight later, or two, I tell you what happened to your brother, then we fuck all night and don’t fight later. Choose!” I balk up at him. I attempt to take a step back but he snakes an arm around my waist and anchors me to him. “Before you try and spit some bullshit, don’t. I know you’re wet for me, so stop fucking torturing my pussy and let me give her some relief.” I snort out a laugh, unable to stop it.
“You ever turn your back on me again, Butcher, and I swear to fucking Christ I will chop you up into little bits myself and make Omen help me bury them around the world.” He fights not to smile and nods. “I mean it, don’t you dare fucking hurt me again. You’re still not forgiven.” His eyes blaze and need courses through me.
“I’ll fuck forgiveness into you, baby. Now, which option?” His voice is husky and sends a shiver down my spine.
“Two.”
“Your brother is alive.” My eyes widen to the size of saucers. “Don’t get excited, I had planned to drag out his punishment but the guys convinced me that killing him would make you hate me, so I just removed some parts, then sent him to Panama to join your father.” He tries to reach for me but I bat his hands away. He flops his head back and groans up at the sky.
“What do you mean removed some parts?”
He smiles sheepishly down at me. “Well, I refused to allow the Valerian name to continue so I removed that sorry ass excuse of a cock. He has nubs for arms and legs. I removed him of his tongue and ears as well. I left the cocksucker his eyes, which I think was very gracious on my part.” I stare up at him speechless. When I say nothing his face falls. “Baby, I let him live for you .”
“I… I don’t know what to say,” I admit. Honestly a lot of my anger I harbored toward Alex was because I thought he killed my brother, but now I find out he didn’t that changes things.
“Are you mad?” he presses.
I shake my head. “No, just shocked.” He reaches out and wraps his arms around me and pulls me against him. I don’t fight him. I return his embrace and melt into him, instantly loving the feeling of safety he offers me without having to do anything aside from just holding me. “Thank you,” I mumble against his chest.
“For what?”
“For not killing him. I know what he did and I know that would have been really hard for you so, thank you.” He pushes me back, then claps my face between his hands and bends down so we are eye level. I reach out and skim my fingers through his beard, relishing in the feeling of it again.
“I love you, Bambi, and I’ll earn your forgiveness and trust back even if it's the last thing I do.”
“Want to earn my trust right now?”
His brow furrows. “How?”
“Don't move from this spot for five minutes.” Before he can grasp my meaning, I turn and flee, his booming laughter following me.
“Run as fast as you can ,Bambi. I’ll find you.” I smile when I reach the woods, this place has memories. I lost my virginity here. I know for a fact it hasn’t been five minutes when I feel him at my back. I don’t turn around.
“You cheated,” I say quietly.
His arm snakes around my waist and pulls me back against him. I gasp when I feel his cock pressing against my back. His other hand grips the front of my throat and tilts my head back to meet his gaze. “There are no rules when it concerns me getting to you. You’re mine, Tatum.” He smashes his mouth to mine and I’m lost to my primal need. I turn in his hold, never breaking the kiss. I wrap my arms around his neck and deepen the kiss—fuck, I’ve missed this so much. I’ve missed him. He grips the backs of my thighs and lifts me. I lock my legs around his waist and grind against his erection, needing some form of friction. I gasp into his mouth and break the kiss when he slams me against a tree. “You have no fucking idea how many times I’ve dreamed of this moment.”
“Well, stop dreaming and make it a reality,” I taunt, his eyes darken and I relish in the sight. He drops me to my feet, steps back into the glow of the moon and yanks his shirt off. I mimic his move, then push my sweats down my legs and kick them to the side. A delicious shiver rolls down my spine because of the way he’s looking at me. He grips his waistband, pushes his sweats down his legs and frees his glorious cock. Oh my God, that sight alone has my mouth watering. I move toward him, loving the look in his eyes. When I drop to my knees before him, his mouth parts in shock. I reach out, grip his cock and love the sounds coming from him when I stroke him.
I press up onto my knees and swipe my tongue across the head of his cock, moaning at the taste of his pre-cum. He shudders and tangles his fingers in my hair.
“Bambi, don’t fucking tease me right now,” he grits out, sounding like he’s in pain.
“Shut up,” I snap, then wrap my lips around him and take him as far as I can into my mouth.
“Fuuuuccckkk,” he roars. He doesn’t try to control my movements, knowing I need to be the one in control in this position. He allows me to set my rhythm and pace. “Shit, baby, that feels so fucking good. Keep sucking me like that, Bambi.” I do as he says, hollow my cheeks and bob up and down faster. The thought of giving someone a blow job was a hard no for me and a trigger, but with Alex, I feel nothing but safe. He’s never pushed me or forced me to do this. He’s always allowed me to move at my own pace, and it's because of that I have the confidence to do it now. “Baby, you gotta stop or I’m gonna cum down that pretty throat of yours,” he forces out through gritted teeth. I pull back and release him with a pop . I look up and love the blissed-out tense look in his eyes, knowing I’m the one that put that look on his face is so fucking empowering.
He grips my arms and hauls me to my feet. His lips are on mine within seconds. This kiss is filled with so much longing and passion that it robs me of air. I’m forced to breathe him in or risk passing out from lack of oxygen. His hands roam my body, his touch so sure and practiced as he has memorized every inch of me. When he cups my tits, I moan into his mouth. My nipples are hard and aching, begging for his touch. I arch forward into his hands, demanding without words that he give me what I want.
He breaks our kiss, then dips his head and wraps his sinful lips around my nipple. I throw my head back and cry out. His arm bands around my waist, holding me in place. His teeth scrape my sensitive nipple, sending a shudder through me. He switches sides and draws another sharp cry from my lips. He swirls his tongue around my hardened nipple, then scrapes his teeth along it, causing me to start panting. I tangle my fingers in his hair and love the feeling of the silky strands falling between my fingers.
He releases my nipple with a wet pop, then reclaims my lips. He pushes his hand between our bodies and skates a single finger through my folds and groans when he feels how wet I am for him.
He breaks our kiss and stares into my eyes as he continues to circle my clit. “You saved this for me for six months, didn't you, Bambi?”
My mouth fires off a response before I can stop it. “What makes you think there wasn’t anyone else?”
His eyes blaze with jealousy and his features darken. He shoves a finger inside my wet cunt. I gasp in surprise and reach out to grip his shoulders as I press onto my tip toes. He fingers me at a punishing pace, making it hard for me to breathe let alone think.
“I may have told my brothers to stop watching you, but that doesn’t mean I didn’t have eyes on you the whole time. For the sake of your mask wearing friends, I hope you’re lying, Bambi, because I would hate to break my vow to you already and murder some motherfucker while you watch.”
There’s something wrong with me. I’m clearly sick in the head. His words shouldn’t inspire a need within me, yet they do, much like Alex. I guess I have a monster of my own inside, one that thirsts for him and his attention.
“Tell me now, Bambi. Were you fucking someone or were you just trying to make me jealous?” he asks in a tone laced with equal parts anger and lust. He may be mad that I said what I did, but it also turns him on. I can feel my orgasm cresting and I try to latch onto it, needing the relief it will give me more than I need my next fucking intake of air, but Alex slows his pace and I growl in frustration. “I’m waiting.”
“No! I never even looked at anyone else. It's only been you. Happy now?” I snap.
The motherfucker smirks. “Ecstatic,” he purrs, then presses the pad of his thumb against my clit and quickens his pace. Moans tumble from my lips and my nails rake down his back as I arch into him, trusting him to hold me as I break apart in his arms. My orgasm is so powerful my knees buckle. Alex’s hold on me is the only thing that keeps me from falling to the ground. My vision blurs as pleasure surges through me like a current and a sheen of sweat coats my entire body. His name was screamed loud enough for the guys back at the house to have heard, but judging from the smug look on his face he’s okay with that.
Alex gently withdraws his finger and brings it to his lips. I watch with rapt focus as he sucks the digit into his mouth and groans at the taste. My pussy clenches on air.
“Fuck, I missed that taste, baby.” He then claims my lips, forcing me to taste myself on his tongue. I love knowing I'm the only woman who will ever get to see him like this.
I’ll be the only woman he’ll ever love.
Alex gently lowers me to the ground and nestles his way between my legs. Butterflies take flight inside my stomach. My body begins to heat in anticipation at what’s to come. He leans forward and rests his hands on either side of my head.
“Put me inside you, baby. I need to feel your pussy now.” I eagerly obey him and the second he pushes inside me I scream.
“Fuck, holy shit. I forgot how big you are.”
Laughter breaks free from him. “Fuck, baby, you’re so good for my ego.”
I swat his chest. “Shut up or I’ll run away from you like last time.” Another bout of laughter escapes him.
“You run, I chase,” he says. Before I can utter a response, he slams the rest of the way inside me. My back arches off the forest floor as my scream rents the air. “Fuck, baby, I missed this.” He growls as he begins to move, not giving me a chance to adjust. I know he’s as wound up as I am and right now, so I don’t need him to drag this out. I need him to fuck me like a beast, then he can take his time later. Right now, all I want is to come on his cock and mark him as mine once again.
My nails dig into the scars on his back as I lock my legs around his waist. He growls his approval and slams inside me harder, the head of his cock hitting my sweet spot and with how fucking turned on I am, I know I’ll be screaming his name within seconds at this rate.
“Alex, don’t stop,” I beg.
“Never,” he vows as he pulls almost all the way out, then thrusts back inside me.
“Do it again, I need—” My demand is cut off when he does it again and my climax erupts from inside me like a volcano. His name is screamed until my throat is hoarse.
“Fuck, Bambi,” he roars, then thrusts once more and follows me over the cliff of ecstasy. He flops forward and buries his face in the crook of my neck—we’re both panting and breathless, covered in sweat and dirt. I wrap my arms around him and run my fingers through his hair, loving the relaxed sigh that escapes him.
“This is what I want forever. There won’t be anyone else in this world that will ever compare to you, Alex. Don’t hurt me again because next time, I won’t survive it.” He pulls back and stares down at me with nothing but love in his beautiful green eyes.
“I’ll never let you go, Tatum. I told you my heart beats for you and I meant it. It's yours to do with as you please. I swear on my sister, I’ll never hurt you intentionally again. Almost losing you put so many things into perspective for me. You are the most important thing in my life and I’m done chasing the ghosts of my past. I found my reason for wanting more from life. I choose to live now for you. I promise I’ll never hide in the shadows again.”
I cup his cheek and fight back my tears. “I love you, Alexander Denver.”
He smiles cockily. “I should hope so since those are my initials tattooed on you.”
I snort. “You’re a real dick, you know that, right?”
He laughs and places a chaste kiss to my lips, then gently pulls out of me. I watch as he stands and searches for his pants. I frown when he grabs his phone from his pocket and hands it to me. I grab it and stare up at him with a raised brow.
“Turn the torch on,” he demands, then turns his back to me. I do as he says and the second I shine the light on his back my mouth falls open. “You weren’t the only one who needed something to hold onto.” I climb to my feet and reach out to trace my fingers over the tattoo that now covers his scars. It’s an hourglass in the middle of a forest with a deer set off to the side. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to know that deer represents me, but it's the words at the top that have me fighting back my tears.
I’d live a hundred lifetimes and search a thousand worlds to find you.
Alex turns to face me and smiles down at me. It’s hard to believe this Aztec god is mine. It’s going to take a long time for me to get used to that fact. “I love you, Bambi.”
I fucking swoon. “I love you too,” I whisper, then press up onto my tiptoes and kiss him. I was never a believer in Disney movies or happily ever afters, but if I had to choose one of those movies to represent us, I guess Beauty and The Beast would be it. I tamed the monster inside him and brought the man lurking inside the shadows out of the darkness to live again.
I guess if you asked Alex, he would say we’d be Little Red Riding Hood because he’s the big bad wolf and blew down the walls of my houses, so he could make a home inside me.