Chapter 13
Lana
I tried not to think too much about what happened between Callan and me the night before, because every time I did, I felt that same, stupid heat crawl up my neck.
I hated how much I had liked touching him.
I hated that my body reacted before my brain could stop it.
It wasn’t like me to be so…touchy? No, that wasn’t the right word.
Open, maybe. Vulnerable was even more fitting.
I didn’t even recognize myself when I thought about the way I let him guide my hand like that, or how my pulse jumped when he spoke to me in that low voice.
It wasn’t just physical, either. There was something about the way he looked at me.
Steady and controlled, but with a kind of frustration that made it hard to breathe.
I shouldn’t have liked that. I shouldn’t have liked any of it.
But I did. I enjoyed his touch, and I liked the fact that it was me who made him so hard.
The thought alone was enough to make my stomach twist with guilt. What the hell was wrong with me?
That’s why I was glad Holland came over tonight.
She was loud, opinionated, and full of useless gossip.
Exactly what I needed to drown out my own thoughts.
She had been dying to know what happened after our FaceTime call two nights ago, so I told her most of it.
I left out the part about me touching Callan’s cock.
She would’ve immediately demanded every single detail, and I wasn’t ready to have that conversation.
Still, she knew about me almost giving up on the essay, and how somehow, Callan had convinced me to keep going.
“So he just talked you into continuing it?” she asked when I told her.
“Basically.”
“And, help me understand here, were you happy about that or not?”
I shrugged. “I’m not sure. I guess it’s better than not having a topic to write about.”
“Or…you were just too excited about everything that you just couldn’t actually walk away from it all. I bet he was playing dirty mind games to win you over.”
I rolled my eyes. “It wasn’t like that.”
“Right,” she said, dragging out the word in that sarcastic way only Holland could. “You’ve always been a terrible liar, Lana.”
I ignored her and went back to slicing a cucumber. We were making snacks to take upstairs. Just some cut-up vegetables and hummus, nothing fancy.
“I swear, my dad’s new girlfriend is like twenty-two,” she said while cutting up another carrot. “She sat there pretending to be so interested in his talk about golf, and I wanted to scream. I mean, she clearly hated golf, so why would you want to talk about it for two hours?”
“You should’ve left,” I said, shaking my head. “If your dad didn’t even appreciate you being there, why did you stay?”
“Because of the food.” She straightened and gave me an unapologetic shrug. “It was the best steak I’ve ever had. So tender and juicy, and that sauce? Oh my god, the butter one with that, like, herby thing in it. Unreal.”
I couldn’t help laughing. “You’re making me want to throw away this hummus and go eat there myself.”
“Don’t be ridiculous. You don’t have that kind of money.”
“Fair enough.” I smiled. “Maybe your dad will invite me next time. I’d sit through two hours of golf talk for a steak like that.”
“I’ll tell him,” she said, grinning.
We kept chopping vegetables, arguing over whether the popcorn should be salty or sweet, and deciding what movies we were going to watch all night long.
The sound of footsteps came from the hallway, and I didn’t even have to turn around to know who it was.
I had lived here long enough to know who was entering a room, even with all these random people hanging around here.
My hands stilled on the cutting board, the knife hovering above the half-cut cucumber.
Holland noticed my pause just as Callan walked into the kitchen.
I glanced over my shoulder, and I noticed that I had done it without wanting to. I hated the effect he suddenly had on me and wished my heart didn’t always pump harder at the sight of him.
He was barefoot, wearing a white T-shirt and gray sweatpants that hung low on his hips.
His hair was slightly damp, and he looked relaxed.
I had seen a few girls running around earlier, and I also got a glimpse of Rocco hanging out with Karlee on the couch just before Holland came, but I hadn’t seen him.
He must’ve been busy. Probably filmed a few things for the movie they were currently shooting.
“Hey,” he said, giving us both a nod, but keeping his eyes on me.
“Hey,” I replied, pressing my lips into a thin line.
I could see Holland grin out of the corner of my eye, and I braced myself for whatever she was about to say.
“Damn…you do look hotter in person.”
I rolled my eyes so far back I thought I’d gone blind. “Holland,” I groaned.
“What? It’s true.” She turned more toward Callan and pointed her knife at him. “I’ve seen a couple of your videos. For…research, of course.”
Callan looked amused. He pursed his lips to hide a grin. “Of course.”
“How’d you come up with that name? Buster Ace. It’s pretty genius.”
“Holls,” I murmured, giving her a serious look. “Please, don’t.”
“What? I’m just making conversation. It’s not every day that you can talk to an actual porn star.”
“I’m just a normal guy,” Callan said with a tight smile.
“Sure, whatever you say, Buster.”
“Please stop calling him that,” I begged, sighing heavily.
“Okay, then I’ll call him daddy. Heard you like that.”
My cheeks burned bright red, and for a second, I thought I had told her about the daddy-accident at the grocery store. But Holland quickly continued.
“Do you have all the girls in your movies call you daddy?”
Callan glanced at me, and while I knew he was enjoying the conversation, he saw how uncomfortable I was and decided to end it by casually changing the subject.
“What are you girls up to?”
Holland rolled her eyes, showing no more interest in him.
That was fine with me. But to be honest, Holland would’ve gotten bored with Callan with time anyway.
While she liked a challenge, she’d rather go after college guys who made it way easier for her.
Guys who were submissive enough to do everything she told them to.
“We’re going to watch a movie or two. Have some snacks and all,” I told him.
“Sounds good.”
“Wanna join?” Holland asked, half-serious.
Callan chuckled. “No, thanks. I’ll leave you two to it. Don’t wanna bother.” He headed over to the fridge and opened it, going through what food we had left.
“What are you looking for?” I asked, watching him get frustrated.
He didn’t glance up. “Just something to eat.”
“You can have some of the veggies and hummus. It’s too much for us anyway.”
He straightened up, shutting the fridge door. “Thanks, but I need protein.”
Got it.
I gave a tight smile and turned back to continue cutting the cucumber. Seconds later, a hand rested on my hip, and his body pressed against mine from behind.
“I’ll try some of that hummus though.”
I froze, set the knife down, and watched him pick up a carrot stick and dip it into the hummus. “This is good,” he said.
“Homemade,” Holland said, grinning. “Well, store-bought, but I added the chives and arranged it nicely.”
He chuckled softly. “Impressive.”
He gave my hip a little squeeze before moving it further down to rest on my ass. I didn’t push him away because I was scared Holland would notice what was going on.
God, who was I kidding? She probably already saw what was happening but just decided to ignore it to see how far it would go.
I cleared my throat and reached back with my left hand—the one Holland couldn’t see because she was standing on my right—and nudged Callan to get him to step away from me. But he didn’t. He only stepped closer and wrapped his arm around my waist, pressing himself harder against me.
It was then that my body and mind surrendered. Whatever he was doing, it was working. And I hated it.
I hated it so much.
I swallowed and glanced at Holland who was very obviously watching us.
“What’s going on here?” she asked, her grin as smug as ever.
“Nothing.”
“Just showing my stepdaughter some love.”
Oh.
I tensed but relaxed the second his thumb brushed against my stomach.
“You know…” Holland said, her expression full of amusement as she waved her hand at us. “This could be a super-hot porn movie. Real stepdad fucks his stepdaughter. Bet that would make millions.”
“Holland.”
Callan chuckled but didn’t respond, and he finally let go of me. “Enjoy your evening, girls.”
He left the kitchen, and I just stared down at the cutting board, unwilling to let Holland see my face after that.
“That was intense. And kinda weird. But mostly hot. And I know you’re extremely uncomfortable right now, so I’m just going to let it go.”
“Thanks,” I muttered.
“But I will bring it up again on Monday.”
I closed my eyes with a pained expression, nodding slowly. There was no going around that. She’d definitely bring it up on Monday.