Chapter 17
“ W e need to talk about the books that your wife has been recommendin’ to Everleigh.” I storm into Cole’s cabin without knocking.
“Mornin’, Mitch.” He lifts his hat from the table and places it on his head before he stands.
“Is she here?” I check around us for any signs of Savannah.
“You just missed her, she left to go shoppin’ with Leia.”
“Do you know what kinda things are in those books, they’re?—”
“I know what’s in ‘em. Some of my wife’s best ideas come outta those books,” he interrupts me with a grin on his face.
“Well, I don’t know if it’s the kinda thing Everleigh should be readin’. I think they might be givin’ her ideas too. She keeps on lookin’ at me weird and last night…” I manage to stop myself before I overshare, but when one of his eyebrows rises, I know I’ve already given too much away.
“It’s wrong, a girl her age, after all she’s been through.” I press my fingers into the table and focus on them rather than facing his judgment.
“You think it’s wrong for her to explore how it’s supposed to be between a man and a woman?” He laughs at me.
“Of course, I don’t, I just think it’s wrong that she’s doin’ it with me.” I grow the balls to look back up at him. “She… She had her hand on my damn cock, Cole. I ain’t a fuckin’ saint.” I scrub my hand over my face because for all of my sins, what I let happen last night feels like the worst of ‘em.
“Has it occurred to you how much confidence that would have taken her to do? Jimmer explained to us all what she’s been through, and I'm guessin’ we only know half of it. She’s been here for six months, and you and that cabin is all she’s known.”
“Which is exactly my point. She’s clearly ready to heal, and she’s thinkin’ I’m her only option. I’m her safe zone, and if I let this go on I’ll be doin’ her more harm than good.” Hearing the words out loud only makes me feel more guilty about what I’m allowing to happen.
“Ever thought that maybe she’s just fallen for the kind, considerate man who’s been takin’ care of her all this time?” Cole frowns at me. “C’mon, Mitch. We’ve all noticed a change in ya, and it ain’t just because Dalton’s gone. Ya can’t deny that you look forward to goin’ home to her, and I can guarantee that it’s her who’s on your mind most of the day while you’re workin’.” He may hit the nail in straight but it makes no difference to the situation.
“That's not what matters here, that girl needs help. Jimmer saved her from those cult bastards, now I need to save her from herself.” That sting finds its way to my chest again when I think about having to distance myself from her. Especially when I know that Cole is right, what happened between us last night was some real progress for her. The fact she trusted me to be the one she made that progress means the fuckin’ world to me. The last thing I want to do is throw that back at her.
“Mitch, this girl likes you, she’s got a therapist, and?—”
“She’s young enough to be my daughter. What the hell does a girl her age want with a grumpy, old cowboy?” I laugh bitterly.
“She’s not like other girls. She’s been through hell and she sees this world differently to others. In normal circumstances the two of you would probably never have met. But ya have, and you’ve been showin’ her that side to ya that ya only ever let the people close to ya see. I don’t think your age is a problem here. I don’t think she is either. I think you are too scared to fall in love.” He crosses his arms and stares at me with a smart look on his face.
“Me, in love?” I snort. “Cole, I’ve made it this far in my life without bein’ a victim to that.”
“Being in love don’t make ya a victim.” Now it’s his turn to laugh. “Sure, it makes ya vulnerable and I know from experience that it can fuckin’ hurt, but there comes a time when you can’t protect yourself from it. It takes over your head and all your senses. Then overrules all your doubts and good intentions. The books ain’t what made Everleigh wanna touch ya last night. You did.”
I scratch the back of my neck and stare back at him, wondering to myself how the hell Cole Carson suddenly became the voice of reason.
“Look, Savannah’s been goin’ on about includin’ the girl in more stuff, around here. She likes her, and ya know what she gets like when she’s got her mind set on somethin’.”
“I don’t, Cole, I don’t wanna push her.”
“I was gonna suggest we have Savannah take over from Josie for a while. I figure if she’s at your place bein’ useful , she won’t be able to help out at the guesthouse anymore. I really need her to start slowin’ down.”
“I think Everleigh would like that.” I nod in agreement. I’ve seen a change in her since she started speaking to Savannah, and although the girl can be a lot to handle, her enthusiasm is kinda infectious. Maybe she’s just what Everleigh needs.
“I’ll have her come by tomorrow then.” Cole leads me to the door.
“That new kid, he’s dedicated,” he mentions as I untether JD and lead him over toward the stable where Cole keeps Rebel.
“Yeah, I’ve been hearing’ good things about him.” I pass Cole his saddle while he dusts off Rebel’s back.
“Garrett tells me the kids up with the sun ridin’ that horse you bought from Wade. She’s still a little jumpy but even Wade’s impressed with the improvement.”
“Maybe she just needed some time and consistency. Wade’s got a lot on, with the baby and all.” I shrug.
“He sure does.” Cole blows out a breath as he checks the strap is tight around Rebel’s belly then jumps on his saddle
“You gettin’ nervous?” I ask, knowing that before Savannah, having kids would never have been a thought in his head.
“I don’t think there's a man who’s about to become a father that ain’t. I just hope my best is good enough.” He shrugs.
“You know it will be.” I hop up on JD so we can ride to the ranch together.
“Who knows, maybe you might find out yourself some day?” Cole raises his eyebrows at me for the second time today.
“Nah, Everleigh can’t have kids anyway.” I shake my head.
“Now who said that I was suggestin’ you have ‘em with her?” The clever bastard winks at me as he kicks Rebel into a gallop and leaves me with something to think about.
We arrive at the ranch within five minutes, all the Carson brothers’ homes are close, mainly because their women are so close and it means they don’t have to stray too far to be together. The girls are all so kind and supportive of each other. It’s the sorta thing Everleigh should experience after all she’s been through.
“Hey, Mitch.” Maisie steps out onto the porch with one of the triplets resting on her hip, and I smile at the little fella before I pretend to pull off his nose.
“Have you seen what Hunter’s managed to do?” She nods her head over to the corral where Hunter has the skittish horse that Everleigh has fallen in love with trotting around it at a steady pace. “Garrett says he’s put in hours of work, all in his own time. He’s impressed.”
“Yeah, well, he seems like a good kid.” I watch him as he continues to ride, wondering who he is and where he came from. He’s taken to the saddle like a duck to water, and he’s proving that he’s eager to impress. You don’t get many kids like that these days.
“He’s the kind of help we could do with.” Cole lifts his nephew up outta Maisie’s arms and sits him on the front of his saddle.
“You're as bad as Garrett. Let’s get him walking first, huh?” She reaches up to take him back, but the kid proves he’s a true Carson when he grips the reins and turns his head away from her.
“Maybe in a few years, champ.” Cole laughs to himself as he hands him back down. “Garrett workin’ in his office today?” he asks, looking around the yard and seeing no sign of him.
“He’s on mayor duties, and not the slightest bit happy about it.” Maisie rolls her eyes.
“Well, he made Harvey a promise, and this town’s gonna be a better place with him in charge,” Cole reminds her, proving again how much he’s changed. He used to hate the world, now he seems determined to find the best in it.
“He’s worried about Bianca Mason, I can tell.” She lowers her voice.
“Yeah, well, he ain’t got no need for that, we took care of the last Mason problem just fine,” Cole sniggers and Maisie narrows her eyes like she’s about to scold him.
“I don’t think you can handle Bianca in quite the same way.” She reminds him of the fact the last Mason problem ended up with two deaths to cover up.
“I think I’ve proven that, if I have to, I will. Whatever it takes.” Cole nods his head before moving on.
“You don’t think he would?—”
“Maisie, darlin’, when it comes to this family I wouldn’t rule out anythin’.” I move along with him, nodding my head at Hunter and letting him see that I’m impressed.