Chapter 36
CHAPTER THIRTY-SIX
Sally
The house is ready for Richie to start whatever process he needs to sell it. I don’t enjoy the fact that he’ll have to travel three hours to have showings, but he claimed it could be a good use of vacation time.
Emmy loves the beach, so taking her to a new one might make her happy.
“Alliance seems like a cute little summer town anyway, so Laura might also enjoy coming down,” Richie reassures me on the phone.
“Are you sure?”
“Stop asking me that, Cotton Candy.”
I smile at the nickname. He only calls me that when he knows I need a little extra love.
When I was a kid, that was my favorite snack to get at any event. It also holds weight because it reminds me of when Richie first addressed me as his sister.
It was my first vacation with the Reed family, and my voice was still high-pitched, and my hair was getting longer. I wanted cotton candy, and the vendor tried to misgender me.
Richie was having none of that and made sure to call me his little sister a total of five times while paying for the sugary snack. Every time I think of cotton candy, I think of him, and it always brings a smile to my face.
“Fine, you win,” I concede.
This causes him to mock cheer. “I always do.”
“Actually, I think Trin does—at least, that’s what family game night always says.”
“Our eldest sister cheats,” he says without missing a beat, just like he always does when I bring up his inability to beat Trinity in Monopoly. “There’s no other way she’d be able to beat me.”
I let out a laugh. He and Trin have always had a rivalry that matches best friends rather than siblings.
They were pretty much raised together until Richie’s parents passed away, and in their will, they had Lynette as the next in line for guardianship.
They knew how much Mama wanted to have a big family.
“You need to visit Lansing again. Emmy loves your pink hair to the point that I might have to fight her out of getting pink curls added to hers.”
“Everything should be ready for you to sell the house.”
“Also, before you hang up, I know we don’t normally celebrate days like today, but happy birthday.”
I still for a second, remembering that today is my nineteenth birthday. I spent so much time crying and figuring things out that it just snuck up on me. The Reed household doesn’t ignore birthdays; we just don’t make a fuss about them. We’d rather celebrate our adoption days.
We say our goodbyes, and I toss my phone onto the bed. Almost like flipping a switch, I’m brought back to Alliance, Michigan.
I stare at the screen of my YouTube channel, the same one I privately uploaded the mockumentary to. My first proper introduction video is uploading.
Fear still prickles my skin at the thought of people having access to such personal information about my trans journey, but I’ve really fought to be this secure in who I am.
Being trans isn’t my entire identity. But it has shaped who I am as a person, so this is a big step.
My last day in Alliance shouldn’t feel this sad. I should be happy. I’m going to college. I’m going to be living with Ella, and we will be living our bad-bitch fantasies.
The whole point of this trip was for me to move forward.
I found the letters, and I’ll sell the house with Richie’s help. A bow on top of this shitty present from my birth parents. I’m leaving.
I’m leaving Adrien, the pier, the market, and the cove.
They’re Oliver’s friends, but they still checked in on me. Oliver probably asked them to come, but still.
Now, I’m just staring at an empty room. The only thing left in here is the bed. We don’t have enough storage to get rid of the beds, but I’m sure we can sell them soon.
“The car is ready,” Ella calls into my room.
“Thanks.” I’m still lost in thought.
Ella walks into the room and sits down on my bed with me.
“Why do I feel so weird?”
She spares a glance at my laptop screen. “Well, you are about to be more open with strangers than you’ve been with anyone in your life.”
The upload reaches one hundred percent, but I hesitate to publish it.
“Take as much time as you need.” She places a kiss on my forehead before walking to the door.
“Ella,” I call out, stopping her. “Thank you so much for being here for me. I’m sorry I took your entire summer up.”
“Sally, I need you to realize that you’re my sister and best friend. I’d do anything for you, and I know you’d do anything for me.”
I blink away the tears that gather in my eyes. We share a look that speaks louder than any words because we love each other more than anything and will always have each other’s backs through thick and thin.
“Whenever you are ready, we’ll be outside.” She leaves the room.
I take a deep breath and look over the room again. This is really the end of it all. I’m turning my back on this town and the memories from both my childhood and this summer.
I steel my nerves and look down at my screen again. The makeshift thumbnail of me in this room takes up part of the screen.
Well, Miss Girl, say hi to the world.
Pressing the upload button, I close my laptop and slide it into my bag.
The bed creaks as I lift myself off the mattress, and my eyes wash over the blue sheets and back up to the basketball net.
Maybe I’ll go to a basketball game while at Grace Hill.
I walk through the house, feeling something steep in my stomach. The emotions start to bubble up my throat.
Why am I feeling sentimental now of all times? I grit my teeth, pushing through the hall and into the kitchen.
Images flash through my head.
Mimi on the floor, planning her manuscript, Leon sitting on the counter with a latte that’s more almond milk than coffee, and Ella practicing her bumps in the most open area of the room in hopes of not breaking anything. Even if I told her, I didn’t care if she shattered every window in this house.
I still don’t care what happens to this house, but now there are memories I don’t fully hate.
When I see the kitchen, I don’t see my bio parents fighting or telling me I’m a burden.
I see my siblings’ smiles.
Jaxon being his reckless self, annoying Ella to death, trying to mess with her practice.
Oliver.
Oliver’s smile, his smell, his arms wrapped around me with a kiss on my cheek and neck.
I flush, feeling the heat of every moment over again. I bite my lip, hoping the little jolt of pain pushes away that sudden emotion.
I might love him more than anything, but that doesn’t change the fact that I’m never coming back here again. I can’t, no matter how many good memories I make, replace the bad. I will still be seen as someone I’m not.
I’m not him anymore.
I’m Sally Reed.
With the last bit of strength surging in me, I press forward, opening the front door and closing it shut.
Pressing my forehead against the cold wooden door, I let out one last sigh before twisting the key and locking it. My head lifts, and look at the rooftop before my body carries me away from the door and to the backyard.
In order to truly let this place go, I need one last look at it from the only spot that gave me comfort. I climb onto the roof and head towards the edge, looking over the yard, my family’s car, and the small, wooded area that separates Oliver’s and my childhood home.
“Hey.”
“Ahh!” My heart jumps out of my chest as I turn around Oliver comes into view. He’s standing just a few feet away with his chest rising and falling in a harsh rhythm like he ran all the way here. “God, you snuck up on me like a ninja.”
He lets out a chuckle. I notice he’s wearing his uniform from Water’s Edge, which means he came from work. He must see the confusion on my face because he then says, “You used to always call me a ninja when we were kids.”
I frown at his attempt to bring up our past. “I don’t have time for this, Oliver. I have to leave.”
I walk past him, half expecting him to reach out and grab me, but he doesn’t.
“You know, you were right before.” His words stop me in my tracks.
I turn around to face him, and he’s already staring me down. I open my mouth to talk, but it snaps shut.
The question on my face must be easy to read because he continues. “There are a lot of things I don’t know. I don’t know what I’ll do in five years. I don’t even know what I’ll have for dinner tonight. But I do know I don’t regret the memories we made as kids or the memories we made this summer.”
My mouth falls open. I’m speechless.
“I know I want to keep making memories with you. I refuse to let your image fade away. I want to picture your hair, your eyes, your smile, the way you laugh and walk through a room. I want to picture it like I just saw it that morning.”
My heart starts to race at his words. He’s talking with such sincerity. Trembles overwhelm me with searing emotion.
“I want to wake up and see you lying next to me. You have the most expressive face I’ve ever seen. I can tell whether you’re having a good dream or a nightmare, and I want to be there to hold you through those bad nights.”
I bite my lip to try to prevent myself from crying. I thought all my tears were dry, but here I am, about to spill enough tears to grow fresh grass.
“Oliver, I can’t—”
“Why not?” He doesn’t sound broken like before. He sounds determined to prove me wrong.
“Because I lied to you. All our summer memories are based on lies.”
“I don’t see it that way,” he denies without question.
I groan in frustration. “Oliver, please don’t make this hurt more than it already does.”
He lets out a bitter chuckle. “But you can hurt me?”
“We can’t.”
“You still haven’t given me a good reason.”
“Because I’m going to college, and I’ll never come back. You love Alliance. I can’t take that away from you!”
“I love the people, not the town. And guess what, Sally…” He stops for a beat just to make sure I’m looking him in the eyes. “I want you more.”
My pulse throbs throughout my body. I open my mouth but close it and turn away from him. I can’t do it anymore. I can’t see the honesty in his eyes.
I march away from him, ready to get off the roof and leave this town forever. If I hear any more, I’ll cave. We won’t work out. I believe him when he says he’d leave this town behind for me, but I still refuse to stop him from coming back here one day.
Before I can reach even five feet, Oliver cuts off my route by stepping in front of me.
“Princess, please.” Now, he really sounds like he is pleading with me.
My heart aches. So much of me wants to just open up my arms and heal any pain he’s suffering, but I’m the cause of his suffering.
“Oliver, you don’t know what you are getting into. You can’t just decide to date me. Especially when the foundation we laid out was fake.”
His jaw clenches, and I can tell he wants to correct me but knows I won’t budge, so he takes a different approach. “Okay, let’s talk and figure out how to rebuild this and make up for lost time.”
“When would we find the time? I’m gonna be away, and you’ll be working to renovate the van.”
A grin forms, covering his entire face. He looks like he just won the lottery.
“How far from your place is Grace Hill?” he asks like it’s a casual question.
“I don’t know, like four hours.”
“When do you leave?”
I tilt my head at him. “In two weeks.” We are arriving during the weekend to give myself and Ella enough time to unpack and explore before classes start.
“What if I helped you move in?” He eyes me intensely, waiting for an answer.
“What?” My eyes widen at the idea of Oliver helping me move to college. Where is this coming from?
“I’ll admit I talked to your sister, and she asked your parents if I could help you move. Of course, that’s only if you’ll have me.” Now he’s grinning down at me.
“You want to help me move into college?”
“Of course I do, princess. It also sounds like the perfect amount of time to figure out how we want to handle this. I want to rekindle our friendship just as much as you do.”
Once again, tears well up, but I can’t stop them this time. No amount of strength can stop the icy stream of tears from wetting my cheeks.
Oliver’s eyes redden as well.
“Please say yes.”
“Yes—”
Before I can even finish, Oliver wraps me up in a hug and twists me around. Normally, this is when he’d kiss me, but after the twirl, he lets me down and grins sheepishly.
“Sorry, I’ve been wanting to hug you since I saw your beautiful face.”
Then it dawns on me that I have absolutely zero makeup on. I took Ella’s advice about travel wear, clad only in a white tank top and sweat shorts.
And while I don’t need Oliver to make me feel proud of being a trans woman, it doesn’t hurt to be still seen that way.
I look over to my family’s red sedan and see Ella and Mimi with their thumbs up.
Those little bitches have been watching this whole time. Red creeps over my cheeks at the thought.
I ignore my siblings and look back at the beautiful, wonderful, perfect, and way-too-good-for-me man still grinning like he’s got an Olympic gold medal.
I’m the medal he’s so proud of, and that thought squeezes my whole being.
“Am I driving with you?” I ask, hoping it’s a yes.
“I want you to, but that’s up to you.” Oliver reaches out but stops. “Sorry, I don’t really know where we should start with this whole rebuilding thing.”
“How about we start simple?” I look him up and down and take his hand in mine. My heart skips a beat, and my skin burns with arousal just from his touch. “Hi, my name is Sally Reed.”