Chapter 12 Evan #2
I try to disappear upstairs to at least change my shirt, but Ma calls me out to the kitchen.
She gasps and her eyes go wide the second she sees me.
“Evan! Baby, what happened?”
I swat her hand away when she comes closer and tries to touch my face.
“Nothing Ma, I just got in a fight. It looks worse than it is.”
“A fight? With who?”
“No one.”
Nate and Stacie are standing at the table. They don’t know where to look. I ruined dinner. My presence here has made everything worse.
“I’m gonna go and get changed.”
Ma tries to call after me, but she trails off when she sees I’m not listening.
I lock the bathroom door and splash my face with water. I need ice. I need a fucking mask or something right now. There’s no hiding the bruising or the swelling around my nose. Fucking Adam.
There’s a knock on the door. I ignore it. They knock again.
“Who is it?”
“It’s me.” Nate. “Let me in.”
He’s not going away. I know how stubborn he is. With a sigh, I open the door. He comes in and locks it from the inside.
“What happened?” he asks, putting his hand on my face. I have to force myself not to close my eyes and surrender to it.
“I just got in a fight with a friend.”
“A friend did this to you? Jesus, Ev.”
I flinch from his touch and go back to the mirror.
“Are you okay?”
“I’m fine, I’ve had worse.”
I pull the shirt off and leave it in a ball. I can feel Nate standing behind me, watching as I bend over the sink to wash my face. I know from experience it’s possible to feel ashamed and turned on at the same time. That’s how most of my hookups before Nate felt.
“Let me help.”
I try to protest, but he presses me back against the sink and wets some toilet paper before dabbing up my nose.
“It’s not broken.”
“I know.”
“Good.” His lips twitch in a smile. “Because I’d be pissed if he messed up your pretty face.”
He’s talking quietly, but my heart still races at the thought of my ma or Stacie hearing him. I should tell him to shut up, but I don’t want to.
“Oh yeah? What would you do?”
“I’d beat him up with my tennis racket.”
I snort and he laughs.
“Shit,” I say, remembering. “I didn’t ask you how your game went. Who were you playing, Harvard, right?”
“It’s called a match, and yeah, we won 7-0.”
He tilts his face to kiss me and I catch his lips gratefully. They’re—he is—like one fucking good thing in a sea of shit. I want to wrap myself up in his world. Tennis matches and country clubs. Even if it is fantasy. Even if it’s only temporary.
“Does it hurt?” he asks. His voice is just above a whisper now.
“No, come here.”
I pull him in by the waist, kiss him properly, my nose stinging when it squishes against his, but it’s worth it.
I put my hands on his neck, kissing him deeply while I grind my cock against his and he sighs into my mouth.
“Evan,” he pulls away, breathless, putting his hands on my chest to keep me at arm’s length. “Fuck, I want to, but we can’t. Not here.”
“I know, relax. I was just teasing you.”
“Asshole.” He grins.
We’re both smiling when we come back into the kitchen. Ma frowns at us.
“So, what’s for dinner?”
I let Stacie steal Nate after dinner to play NHL-something. Nate doesn’t even know the rules of hockey and I can hear her kicking his ass while I help Ma with the dishes.
She’d usually be smiling her head off over me helping her, about Nate being here, but she keeps side-eying me like she’s gonna cry.
“Stop looking at me like that, Ma.” I dry a plate and put it in the cupboard.
“I can’t help it, you’re my baby. I hate seeing you hurt.”
“I’m not a baby, I’m twenty-years old.”
“You’ll always be my baby.”
She hands me another plate after rinsing off the bubbles.
“I wish you’d stop hanging out with those losers.”
I dry the plate and put it in the cupboard.
“Did one of them do this to you?”
“It was just a stupid fight, Ma. It happens.”
“No, you and Nate never got into fights.”
“Yeah, we did.”
“You never came home like this.”
“That’s because Nate’s a pussy.”
She tuts at the word.
“Sorry, Ma.”
Nate groans from the living room. I’m guessing Stacie scored on him again.
We wash and dry in silence. When Stacie starts singing “Another One Bites the Dust,” I’m guessing she’s struck the final blow on Nate’s little hockey team.
I realize I don’t want him to leave when we’ve finished washing the dishes and Stacie comes in to tell us she kicked Nate’s ass. Even though it’d be hell lying next to him in bed, smelling his skin and staring at his lips, I want him here.
Nate’s putting the controllers away when we come into the living room. It’s weird how quickly we’ve started using this room again. I have to remind myself every time I walk in here that’s it’s alright.
“I’d better get going,” Nate says.
“Why don’t you stay over?” Ma asks.
“Um … ” he looks at me. “Sure, if it’s okay.”
“You can’t,” I say. Everyone turns and looks at me. “You’ve got that thing, at the frat house.”
Nate shrugs. “It’s not important, I don’t have to go.”
“Well then, that’s settled.” Ma says. “I’ll get the air bed from the cupboard."
“I’ll get it,” I say.
Nate’s face is bright red. He’s rubbing the back of his neck. He’s so bad at lying. He knows I’m not gonna make him sleep on a fucking air bed. But Ma would find it weird if we offered to sleep together.
We brush our teeth side-by-side in the little bathroom.
Nate’s using a spare toothbrush Ma found in the cupboard.
I can hear Stacie talking on the phone in the next room while we settle into bed.
Nate’s wearing one of my old t-shirts and a revealing pair of boxer briefs that are gonna make it very fucking hard to fall asleep next to him.
His body heat radiates under the blanket. His skin brushing against mine every time he moves.
“Stay still.”
“Sorry.” His minty breath blows against my neck.
I can feel him trying to be still, but he’s like a fucking puppy dog—all pent up energy with nowhere to go.
I think about taking him out into the woods behind the house, letting him fuck me against a tree again, but I’m so tired.
And weirdly, I want to lie here with him more. In the warmth and safety of my own bed.
“Ev?”
“What?”
He swallows. “Can I spoon you?”
I snort. “Seriously?”
“Yeah. It’s okay if-”
I reach behind me and grab his arm, pulling it over my waist. “There. Happy?”
“Yeah.”
I think he’s gonna be quiet now, go to sleep. His body’s pressed tight against me. His soft cock is warm against my back. If it was hard, I don’t know if I’d be able to resist touching it.
“Ev?”
I blow out a big sigh. “What?”
“Are you happy?”
“What kind of question is that?”
“I know obviously you’re not happy. I know you’re going through a lot right now, but I mean, about this, us. You are happy about it, aren’t you?”
Us? What’s he talking about? Why does he have to do this? Surely he understands why I don’t expect him to hang around for this?
“Nate, it’s been a long day, go to sleep.”
I feel instantly guilty.
“Okay.”
I know I won’t be able to sleep until I say something back.
“I’m … I’m glad you’re here. Happy?”
I think I feel him smile against the back of my neck.
“Yeah. Me, too.”