Chapter Nine
Jin
I stare as Leo leaves the mall. I guess I owe Tilly an apology. Her success rate really is something else.
I do my best to focus on my customers but it’s hard when my mind left along with Leo. He’s a phoenix. The wings on my back have a brand new meaning. All this time, being drawn to Leo meant something! He’s my soulmate!
Gods, I was so silly to doubt Tilly. Why would she tattoo my own wings on my back? That’s ridiculous. I feel so stupid.
I’m overwhelmed with how happy I am. Is that what Leo wants to talk to me about? Does he feel the same things I’m feeling? Has he realized we’re meant to be even before I could?
Once I’m finished with my customers, I pull out my phone, googling ‘phoenix shifter dating’, reading article after article. ‘Courting’ is the word I’m looking for. Shifters like to be courted. Or at least, some of them do.
I read until I’m overwhelmed with information. That’s not enough. I need to be prepared. I need to know how to properly woo Leo now that I know he’s a shifter. I pull up Bren’s contact information, giving him a call.
“Bren? Hi, it’s me, Jin,” I say, hoping it’s okay that Leo gave me his number a few weeks ago. “Can I ask you a question about phoenix shifters?”
Bren laughs in a soft and amused way. “Of course, Jin. Let me come by the coffee stand and I’ll tell you everything you need to know.”
I grin so wide that my cheeks hurt. Tonight is the night and I’m not leaving anything to chance.
***
My heart is pounding against my ribs as I step up to Leo’s door, knocking softly. It only takes a moment before he’s opening the door and allowing me inside.
“Hi,” I say softly, looking over his face. My smile slips away. His skin is pale, his eyes glassy, his hair somehow looking more limp than usual, like it’s falling down along with his mood. It takes everything in me to not immediately pull him into a tight hug and ask him what’s wrong.
“Hi, Jin,” he says back, just as softly. “I’m really glad you’re here.”
“You are?”
Leo hums, his eyes darting down to the garbage bag beside me. His eyes narrow. “Did you bring me trash?”
“What? No! Of course not!”
“What’s in the bag?”
I rub the back of my neck. I realize with a start, that there’s a very good chance that Bren has set me up for some sort of prank. I’ve heard the tales, but surely he’d know this is serious, right?
“I brought you my comforter and some of my dirty clothes,” I say slowly, feeling my cheeks heat. “They’re umm, they’re for your nest?”
Leo’s brown eyes are so wide. He bites his bottom lip before nodding, holding out his hand for the bag. I hand it over.
“Are you sure you don’t mind? I’m not sure when I’ll give them back.”
“I don’t mind. I promise.”
“Okay,” he says, hefting the bag up into his arms, hugging it against his chest. He makes a pained groan before looking at me again. “This means a lot to me, Jin.”
“I’m glad it could help.”
“I’m just gonna put this in my bedroom and then we can talk, okay? You can meet me at the couch.”
Instead of going into the living room, I stay in the kitchen.
I make Leo a cup of tea and then grab a bowl of almonds.
Bren didn’t tell me everything but he told me it would be wise to ask for the next week off, so on the way over, I made the call.
Thankfully, my boss was super understanding of the whole thing.
By the time Leo comes back into the living room, I have everything on the coffee table, ready for him. He makes a soft noise at the back of his throat, sitting beside me on the couch. He takes the cup of tea, giving me a soft smile from over the rim of the mug.
“Thank you,” he says, leaning his head back against the back of the couch, letting out a sigh. I can see his body is more relaxed than when I first got here. Is this because of me? Is my presence helping whatever is going on with him right now?
“So,” I say, wanting to get the conversation going. “You’re a phoenix shifter.”
“Yeah. I guess I should ask, what are you, Jin?”
“A Seraphim.”
“Oh, that’s really cool. I don’t really know much about angels. Do you have a pheromone nose?”
I shake my head. “Nah, no enhanced sniffing for me.”
“That’s okay. I do and it can be kind of annoying sometimes,” he says with the tiniest chuckle. “I don’t really know how to say this so I’m just gonna blurt it out and hope it doesn’t freak you out, okay?”
Reaching over, I take one of his hands in my own. His skin is clammy, like maybe he’s getting sick. His skin is still too pale and there’s a bead of sweat sliding down the side of his head. “Whatever you say won’t freak me out because it’s you and I care about you, Leo. I care about you a lot.”
“Oh,” he says softly, his brown eyes wide again. I don’t understand how he can be so surprised. So I say just that.
“Why are you so shocked? I already told you, Leo. I like you. I have feelings for you.”
Leo’s cheeks turn red which is far better than the pale color. “But you also called me your friend!”
I tilt my head to the side, not understanding. “Yes? Because you are my friend, but you’re also so much more. I don’t kiss my friends, Leo. I don’t kiss anyone other than you.”
“Oh my gods,” he says, under his breath. He shakes his head before setting down the mug of tea on the table and turning on the couch to better face me. “I’m such an idiot. I care about you too, Jin. I umm, I more than like you actually.”
“You do?” Hope blooms in my chest, making me feel warm all over.
“Yes. So much so that my body agrees with my heart.”
“What does that mean?”
“I’m an omega phoenix shifter,” he says slowly.
“My body is in pre-heat right now and soon, I’ll go into a mating heat.
My body wants to mate you, Jin.” Then he quickly adds, “but it’s not just my body, it’s all of me.
It’s my heart too! I’ve been stealing your clothes and using them in my nest and for the first time ever, I want someone to join me in my nest. I want you to join me in my nest.”
“Oh,” I say softly. I remember reading that nesting is a big part of phoenix culture. It’s sacred and special and only family members or mates or children are allowed in someone’s nest with them.
“At first, I thought maybe you were just excited to try out physical things with me, but that’s not the case, is it?”
I shake my head, squeezing his hands. “No! I want to try everything with you, Leo. I want to be your first and I want you to be my first. More importantly, I want us to be each other’s last as well.”
Leo smiles and his eyes water. “I want that too.”
I can’t hold myself back a moment longer.
I let go of Leo’s hands and instead, cup his face between my palms. I lean over and kiss his lips.
The kiss is gentle yet firm, a reminder that this is real, that this is a brand new start.
We’re on the same page now, actively wanting each other.
This is so much more than trying something new, this is the start of our relationship, one that I know in the pit of my soul will last forever.
“Jin,” Leo breathes out, “come to my nest with me?”
“Of course,” I say, taking Leo’s hand and standing up. I wrap my arm around his waist, following his lead as we walk into his bedroom.
In the corner of the room is a closed off area, surrounded by curtains that hang from the ceiling. Leo steps over to the curtains, pulling it to the side. He crawls in, waiting for me to join him.
This feels like such a huge moment and I don’t want to screw it up. Leo is letting me into something that is sacred, something that is precious to him.
“Should I take my pants off? They smell like outside and I don’t want to mess up your nest.”
“Sure,” Leo says softly, smiling up at me from where he’s kneeling in his nest. “Take your shirt off too. Here, you can put this one on,” he tells me, tossing me one of my own shirts that I brought in the garbage bag earlier.
After switching my shirt, I crawl into the nest with Leo. Leo pulls the curtain closed. It would be dark if it weren’t for the little lights dangling from the ceiling. Everything is so warm and so soft in here, just like Leo himself.
“Your nest is wonderful,” I say softly, sitting pretzel style next to him. “So cozy and inviting. Thank you for allowing me inside.”
Leo smiles softly, his hand petting one of the blankets. He looks so proud of his nest and my chest surges with affection. Gods, he’s so cute. All I can think about is wrapping him in my arms and holding him tight, so that’s exactly what I do.
“Lie back with me?”
Leo nods his head. Once I’m on my back, he places his head on my chest, his arm around my middle.
Then he grabs the blanket I gave him today, using it to cover us both.
I might not be able to smell things like Leo can, but even I can tell this nest smells like the both of us.
A perfect representation of our budding relationship.
I run my fingers up and down Leo’s spine, feeling him relax against me.
He’s still far too pale and looks like he’s in pain, but just being here with him seems to be relieving a lot of his discomfort.
I’m so thankful I can help Leo like this, just by being here.
I want to help. I want to take care of him.
I want to do everything in my power to make sure he’s safe and happy and okay.
“Leo,” I say softly, brushing my lips against the top of his hair.
“I want this heat to happen without any misunderstandings between us. You mean so much to me. I didn’t even know it was possible to fall so thoroughly for someone so quickly but ever since I bumped into you, you’ve become a staple in my life.
It’s like you reside inside my ribcage, right next to my heart, and somehow that’s still not enough.
I want more and more and more. I’m completely obsessed with you in every way. ”
Leo lets out a soft breath, something like a gasp and a sigh. His hand finds the front of my shirt, holding on tight.
“Oh,” he breathes out.
“I know why,” I tell him softly, my lips tugging up into a grin. “Do you remember when we met? There was this tattoo artist.”
“I remember,” Leo says, barely above a whisper. “I remember everything about you, Jin.”
Oh my gods. My heart cannot take this. I think it might actually explode.
“She was offering soulmate tattoos. At first I was so fucking confused. I thought the tattoo meant I was destined to be alone which made my feelings for you all the more confusing. How could I be alone when all I could think about was you?”
Leo sits up so that he can look down at me. His brown eyes are wide, full of emotion. He nibbles on his bottom lip for a moment before softly asking, “Can I see it? Your soulmate tattoo?”
I nod my head. Leo sits back, giving me room to properly sit up and take my shirt off. Then I turn around, showing him my back. I hear a soft gasp before tentative fingers touch the ink.
“Leo?”
Leo makes a broken noise before I feel his entire hand cover the tattoo, his forehead falling against the nape of my neck. His other arm comes around, wrapping around my middle, holding me tight in this backwards hug.
“Jin,” Leo gasps out, his breath hot against the back of my neck. “You have no idea what this means to me.”
“I know,” I say right away, needing him to understand. “I know, Leo, because I feel it too.”
I hear Leo start to sniffle against my skin, feel the wetness of his tears. I give him a moment, just one moment, before I turn around and pull him against my chest once more. I hold him tight, allowing all the emotions he’s feeling to present themselves. He doesn’t have to feel them alone.
“I’m here,” I whisper into his hair. “I’m right here and I’m not going anywhere, Leo.”
“I want you, Jin. I want all of you. I want you in my nest and in my life and in my heart. I want you to be my mate.”
“I already am,” I tell him with a smile. “You’re my soulmate.”
“When my heat hits, I want you to mate me.”
I squeeze him tight, my heart skipping a beat. “I can do that,” I tell him right away. I touch his chin, forcing him to look up at me. Then I kiss his lips.
The kiss is soft. It’s a physical representation of solidifying my promise to make him my mate. I have no idea what that entails but that’s okay, I’ll figure it out. Right now, all that matters is making sure Leo knows exactly how I feel, how much I adore him, how wanted he is.
“I’ll mate you,” I say against his lips. “You’ll have to tell me how to do it, but I’ll do it. I’ll do whatever you want. I am yours.”
Leo whines, pulling me into another kiss, this one more fierce. His tongue sweeps across my bottom lip and I open for him, allowing his tongue to brush against mine. He tastes so good, feels so good. Gods, Leo himself is just so good.
I’ve never felt like this before about another person and I doubt I ever will again.
Leo is my person. He’s it for me. I want to do everything in my power to make him feel as happy as he makes me.
I want to make him feel good. I want him to never doubt what he is to me or how much I adore him.
I want to give him everything, every single part of me.
I pull away, ready to have Leo explain everything to me but just then, his stomach rumbles. I can’t help but grin. Reaching up, I run my fingers through his thick, black hair that always looks like he’s just rolled out of bed.
“I’ll go get you something to eat.”
“Nothing too heavy,” he says, wrinkling his nose. “My stomach really hurts.”
“Okay, how about some rice and broth?”
“Perfect,” Leo says, smiling at me. “I like that you’re taking care of me.”
“I like it too,” I say, giving him a quick kiss before crawling out of the nest. “I’ll be right back.”
As I walk to the kitchen, I feel lighter than I have in days. I’m determined to make this heat as good for Leo as I can, starting by feeding him.