Chapter 27
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Johannes
Texas is where I’ll finally make it happen.
Where I start that final push to leapfrog Harper to the World Championship.
I’ve made some good leeway in catching him up, but I need a win, and for him to have a really bad race and finish outside the points.
I would never wish that for him – I love being his biggest competitor and our battle on the grid – but right now, I could do with his engineers fucking up a pit stop or two.
I’ve been trying to sleep for hours on the plane from Qatar to Austin, but I can’t drift off.
My usual podcast routine hasn’t helped, nor has the fact that Caleb and I have sort of bedded down together, despite being in separate seats.
Two separate blankets, but he’s reached his hand across the lowered divide, clutching me close.
It’s risky when we’re surrounded by our colleagues, but the blankets cover us and Nils is the next closest person to us – and he’s been conked out for longer than anyone. The plane is quiet as everyone tries to get some sleep, but what’s going on in my head is stupidly loud right now.
I qualified first in Qatar, but it still wasn’t enough. And, yeah, I was still recovering from two broken ribs and the pain had been a little bit bad in the actual race after taking my painkillers too early and the race being delayed.
But now, as we fly to Texas and the race isn’t for a whole six days, I have plenty of time to be fully recovered and ready to make the last three races my absolute bitch.
If I win all of them, it still won’t be enough for me to beat Harper if he finishes second in all of them.
I need Elijah to be on his absolute A game and push Harper down to third in a race – or three.
I’ll literally take anything at this point.
I am so fucking tired. I grab my phone from where it’s on charge and, fuck, we are just an hour and a half from landing. How long have I actually been lying here? Why won’t my brain just switch the fuck off? Why can’t I just fucking win?
Texas. That’s what I have to focus on. Visualisation.
That’s what my strategist is always talking about.
It’s not always been my go-to. I prefer the stimulator or to make the most of the free practices when it comes to getting a good feel for the track.
But maybe it’s what I need right now to get that win.
The Circuit of Americas is an easy one for this technique.
That uphill climb at the first turn is significant and I know I need the speed to truly conquer it, so I need to be in Q1 to get up there right off the bat.
Then it’s all about making sure no bastard overtakes me on that sharp left turn.
Not breaking too hard or risking a lock-up, but making sure I don’t end up in the wall at the same time.
Then the esses – four, S-shaped corners that really test my precision. They demand a delicate balance of aggression and finesse, which is what Harper has in bucket-loads. And whilst I have the finesse, sometimes my aggression doesn’t pay off.
I roll through the track in my brain, trying to picture where my weak points are and almost want to scream. This is the perfect track for Harper, damn it.
Caleb’s arm slips from mine as the pilot announces our descent and people around us start to stir.
‘Jesus, who’s pinging off your phone?’ Caleb asks as we finally land in Austin. Whoever put Qatar and Texas back-to-back needs their head checking. Worst flight of the season so far.
Peering down at my phone, I’m met with ten excited texts from Harper, letting me know that Kian’s flown into Texas for the next five days to surprise him. Plus, three selfies of them together – one, very topless that I didn’t need to see.
‘That would be Harper. Kian’s surprised him by flying in for a few days. He can’t stay for the race, but I think they’re both suffering withdrawal symptoms. Harper is of course very excited. He practically combusts any time Kian does something nice for him.’
‘Hey, do you think they’d be up for a double date whilst we’re out here?
Maybe in the next couple of days before things get crazy.
’ Caleb’s leaning across the middle of our seats and I’m so tempted to kiss him, but we aren’t in private and the team would crucify us at this point in the season.
We can’t afford any distractions in these final weeks, and I’m sure a relationship between a driver and his race engineer would be nothing but.
‘You serious? I think Harper would die if I even suggested it. He’s been desperate to conduct a Spanish inquisition.’
‘Well, on second thoughts…’
‘Kidding, kidding. I’ll make sure Kian keeps him on his leash.’
‘Now I’m imaging your best friend in a harness and leash. Why would you even suggest that?’
‘Stop imagining my best friend naked. That’s gross.’
Nils finally stirs from the seat across the aisle, his fluffy blond hair sticking up in every direction. ‘Did we land?’ he mumbles.
‘Yeah, we landed. You okay, bud? You look very dazed right now.’ He’s rubbing sleep from his eyes, blinking like he can’t quite remember where he is. It’s kind of cute, but then he yawns like he hasn’t just slept for seven hours and I’m almost worried about him.
‘I’m at the point in the season where I don’t know which country or time zone I’m in. Plus, last night I was kept awake by two guys having very loud sex while I’m going through a dry period, so, you know.’
‘Whoops?’ Caleb offers up and I can’t help but laugh. Maybe we’re being way too obvious, but I don’t actually care right now.
‘I’m making sure our hotel rooms aren’t sharing a wall tonight if it kills me. What excuse can I give the room coordinator to make sure of it?’
‘Um…’
‘Or we could just sleep in my room tonight?’ Caleb suggests and I nod eagerly.
‘Smart man. Knew there was a reason I liked you.’ I brush the side of his arm with my hand almost about to rest it on his thigh when Nils clears his throat, bringing me back into the reality that we are currently on the team plane and he’s the only one who knows about us.
* * *
Harper’s so keen for a double date that we end up at dinner the next night.
Caleb’s chosen the perfect BBQ restaurant and the conversation comes easy, considering the thing we all share in common.
It’s nice as we enjoy a couple drinks and then the biggest platter of meat and sides anyone has ever seen.
‘When I first met you two, nothing could have convinced me that a few years later you’d both be in committed relationships,’ Kian says as he looks between his husband and me.
Nor me, to be honest. Even though I was more at the point where I wanted to step away from the constant sleeping around than Harper, I don’t think I was close to being ready to settle down.
‘Well, you are partly to thank for that. Considering you tied this one down and stopped him being such a slut.’
‘I mean, tied down is one of my favourite—’ Kian quickly shoves a fry into his husband’s mouth, promptly shutting him up.
‘Sorry, my husband possesses zero people skills, which is why he participates in such a solo sport.’ We all laugh as Harper pouts. This is one of the many reasons I truly love Kian for him. He balances him out but doesn’t completely restrain him from being the Harper James we all know and love.
‘I’m surprised you didn’t stick around in the sport,’ Caleb comments as our desserts arrive. Half of us definitely shouldn’t be eating them, but Caleb offered to split a piece of fudge cake and ice cream with me, and I’m weak when it comes to chocolate cake and this man sitting next to me.
I’m diving into the cake before Caleb can even finish his sentence because it looks so damn good. I’ll happily pay for this with an early-morning run with Caleb tomorrow.
‘Trust me, I had plenty of chances. Jackson’s still trying to convince me to come back, but I can’t leave the farm now.
I don’t even want to, which is still a shock to me considering how much I love this sport.
’ I’m surprised, too, because I thought Kian would die at Hendersohm.
But nope, he’s hardly even an affiliate at this point, except for his legacy.
‘How much say does he have in the team?’ Caleb asks as I steal another chunk of cake and glob of ice cream. Eating gives my hands something to do while they discuss my least favourite topic.
Nothing more uncomfortable than your current boyfriend discussing your secret ex-boyfriend with your ex-friends-with-benefits and his husband.
‘Well…’ Kian looks at his husband like he’s not sure whether to say what he knows or not.
‘What?’ Caleb pushes. It’s not like the whole of Hendersohm aren’t aware at this point that Jackson will be taking over at the end of the season, but it hasn’t been officially announced yet. There’s been a ton of speculation, and no one will be surprised when it does finally get announced.
‘If you were to ask me off the record, I think Jackson will be team principal by the end of the season.’ Kian looks happy about that, smiling wide with pride for his friend. I know Harper said they’d become close over the years, but this is torture.
‘He’s making his old man so proud,’ Harper comments and my fingers grip the edge of the booth tightly. ‘He’s got a permanent supply of whisky in the bottom drawer, just like Anders. Can’t tell you how many times I’ve found him a little drunk in there when he’s been working late after work.’
‘I’ve talked to him about this,’ Kian replies. ‘He can’t keep doing that, but apparently, he’s looking forward to being team principal, he’s perpetually bummed about someone he lost to get there.’
‘Yeah, he keeps saying the same thing to me – but he won’t tell me who this guy is,’ Harper says.
The last thing I need right now is Harper digging any more into that and putting two and two together. To be honest, I’m a little surprised he hasn’t.
‘We just need to keep being there for him, that’s all we can do.’