Five Dates

16. Margo

CHAPTER 16

Margo

A fter round two, I left to go to Jeannie’s apartment. She has a box of my things I forgot. Tommy had to do some things to set up for date five. I have a feeling he’d rather stay inside me for the entirety of that date, but I don’t want to mess with his plans. She’s sitting at her desk daydreaming about Fish. They had a date the night before, and she literally cannot get enough of him. “Why isn’t he here now? I canceled our workout session because I needed to be with Tommy.”

She spins from her desk. “You did it.”

I smile. “More than once. Just as good as I knew it would be.”

“Because you waited, and there were emotions attached.” She tries her psych mumbo jumbo on me, but I’m still mad about how quickly she locked down with Fish.

I pour myself a glass of water and lean against the counter. “Maybe, or maybe he was right for me all along, and I’ve been missing the best sex of my life because of your dumb rules.”

“Okay, okay, I admit that I was wrong with what I did with Fish so soon, but you needed a reset, and this was exactly what I hoped would happen. So, you’re just going to live with him?”

I shrug. “I hope so. There was just business to take care of this afternoon, so we’re going to talk tonight.” She winces, and I know she catches what I’m putting down. I’m honestly still daydreaming about the sex and how it felt out of this world. I’m counting down to having sex with him again tonight. There’s so much catching up to do—so many places I want him. “He is so big and strong. Like his muscles,” I say, dragging a finger across my bottom lip. “He just tosses me around like a rag doll.”

Jeannie puts up a hand but has a smile on her face. “Stop. If you keep talking, I’m going to think about Fish, and I can’t see him until tomorrow, and that’s not fair.”

“You’re really happy? This wasn’t an alpha male fluke? Like, his mind is a good mind for you? Is it a match?”

She nods. “As crazy as it sounds, yes.” Jeannie shakes her head. “Back to you. Living with him. Having sex with him. Will there be more commitment?”

My stomach flips every time I think of all the different ways, he’s proposed but hasn’t quite.

“He’s not afraid to talk about forever. The way he looks at me. The way he sees me. It’s unlike anything else. I called my mom on the way over here and told her this was it. She didn’t even question it.” I pause, deep in thought. “She said she didn’t ever remember hearing me this happy. Not even with…Hollis.”

“Have you heard from him again? Does Tommy know you talked to him?”

“Hell no,” I reply. “He can’t know that. It’s taken care of. Tommy worries too much about me. He might get mad at Fish if he knew Hollis found me and got close enough to talk to me. I haven’t heard from him since. It’s done with him. Now it’s just whoever approached Hollis to begin with,” I explain, feeling wildly detached from that fear now that Tommy is home.

“Don’t worry, that’s probably over and done too,” Jeannie reassures. “Why don’t we have dinner here next weekend night? You and Tommy, and Fish can come too.”

I open my mouth in mock outrage. “You’re going to share Fish with us?”

She shakes a finger. “You can’t stay all night. We have other things to do.”

“So do we,” I say, daydreaming about his body against mine. I put my glass in the dishwasher. “So, date five is tonight,” I announce.

“I was going to pick up a little something spicy at the store while he sets up. I think he’s cooking something or decorating. I have no clue, but it calls for red lingerie.”

She scoffs, closing her laptop. “Go with black, Margo. Don’t be a ho.”

“Listen you know damn well I’m a ho at heart. I showed him the all-out Margo this afternoon, and not only was he in awe and appreciative, he matched the energy.” My core clenches when I think of how into me he was.

Jeannie laughs. “Fine, fine. Take that bottle of wine, and don’t forget the box.” I open the box sitting on the coffee table, and my stomach drops. It’s the relationship box for Hollis. I forgot that I dumped this stuff in here when I moved in with Jeannie. It has trinkets and mementos I couldn’t bear to throw away after we broke up. I pick up a manila envelope on top and peek inside, forgetting exactly what I warranted keeping. It’s love notes. My stomach drops.

“Bye Jeannie,” I say. “See you Saturday. I’ll bring a healthy dessert.”

“Please not the gross date things you tried to pass off as brownies last time we made dinner together.”

“No promises!” I close the door, and she locks it behind me. I toss the entire box in the dumpster around the corner and head to the mall. The confidence to move on fully and completely is a brand-new sensation, but one I welcome.

Tommy is waiting with a beer in each hand when I walk in the door an hour later. “It’s not The Bouncing Bull. It’s better,” he exclaims, waving his arm to the living room where he’s set up twinkling lights crisscrossed on the ceiling. A picnic is spread across the floor. “This is The Springing Stallion! I don’t usually encourage shoes in the house, but this is a bar after all. There’s no telling what’s on the floor, or what will end up on the floor.”

Tommy winks, and I melt, stepping out of my sneakers and into the white boots he loves so much. He has to be exhausted, and he’s gone through a lot of trouble to make this fifth date something magical.

“Thank you for doing this, Tommy,” I say, walking toward him. He meets me in the middle underneath the lights. “This is really special. I want you to know how much this means to me.”

He lifts and lowers one shoulder. “It’s just a picnic and some lights, Margo. I’ll give you much more than this in the future. I wanted to mark the fifth date with something other than feral, life-changing sex so you know I want you.” He cups my face and kisses my nose lightly. “All of you. Not just your sex-crazed libido.”

“Listen, it’s just for you. I’m glad I didn’t scare you off.”

He sets the beers down on the counter and raises one brow. “There’s nothing you could say or do that would scare me off. Speaking of scary, I need to tell you what happened while I was gone. It’s going to dim the mood, but I’m going to share my life with you and that means all aspects.” Guilt rears for not telling him about the conversation with Hollis. I’ll tell him after he tells me if the mood is right. Tommy brings me over the blanket on the floor and pulls me down to sit next to him.

“It’s a lot,” he says, face grim.

I cup his cheek, gaze locked with his. “I can take it.”

He tells me from the beginning. How he felt when he arrived when we were talking more frequently. He takes me through the timeline. The story morphs, and the quality takes on a fictional hue because it’s so dark. Tommy had to switch off his emotions to function—to survive. When he recounts the mission where his teammates died, tears form in his eyes. He takes a beat or two to recover, and he moves on, letting everything spill out in earnest.

“I need you to know that it was never about my lack of love for you. It was because I love you…too much,” Tommy says, waiting for my reply. He kisses my forehead once lightly. “I also need you to know that I’m not sure I can do it again.”

I narrow my eyes. “Do what again?”

“Deploy. This life. It might have been a mistake. The whole thing.”

I shake my head. “Not because of me, though? Not because you don’t want to leave me. I can’t be the reason your career ends.”

Tommy closes his eyes and takes my hand. “I feel like a failure.”

“Listen to me, you aren’t a failure, Tommy. You are a damn hero, and I am so proud of you that it seeps out of me any chance I get to brag about you, okay?”

His smile is sad. “I know you are, but what if this isn’t what I want? Would you love me then?”

“Is this what you had to talk to me about? In that email? I thought you were breaking up with me. Never once did I think this is what you were going to tell me.”

Another chuckle. “Guys suck like that, I guess. I’m sorry you thought that. Yes, this is what I wanted to talk to you about.”

“I don’t think my opinion should matter, Tommy. This is a huge decision. One that you shouldn’t take lightly. Or have any interference from others on.”

Reaching into his back pocket he pulls out a lone ring. It’s a large round diamond on a simple gold band. He extends it to me. “I’m not inside you, Margo, and I wasn’t joking about forever. Your opinion is the only one that matters. We’re our own team. If you want to be.”

I’m stunned speechless as I stare at the ring he’s pinching between two fingers. I let my gaze flit up to meet his questioning eyes. “You’re serious. This is what you want, no questions asked. Marriage? Forever?”

He nods, tears glazing his eyes. “Sometimes you need a year, or three, sometimes you only need five dates. Forever. Marriage. You and me. I know it’s a lot, and some may argue we don’t know each other well enough, but I’m confident in us. In our bond. This is what it feels like when destinies collide. This is fate. This is always where we were going to end up. Everything we went through were just stepping stones to get us to where we are meant to be. In this living room, under the lights of The Springing Stallion, you looking at me like I’m crazy, and me praying with all my might that you’ll say yes.” He exhales. “You will always be my first priority. Your thoughts matter. What you want matters to me. Every day I will make sure you know that.”

I put a finger over his mouth. “I’m the same brand of crazy as you,” I reply, laughing through happy tears. “I will marry you. I will be by your side no matter the circumstances. Do you understand what that means? You can choose whatever career you want and love, and I’ll support it. This relationship always felt a bit dreamy, like it was too good to be true, but I now know that’s how all real relationships feel.”

He bites his lip, then pulls my left hand from my lap. “I’m going to put this thing on you like I should have months ago.”

“What do you mean months ago?”

“This is an heirloom. I knew I was going to ask you when we were in Texas and got it from my parents.”

I look at the sparkly rock on my finger and hate that she is the first thing I think about. “You didn’t offer this to Dani, did you?”

He grins. “No way. She didn’t want an old dead lady’s ring. I bought her something different but never actually proposed. I had the ring though. I had a feeling you’d like this one more than something new.” His knowing smile melts my heart.

I sigh. It’s stunning. “Your feeling was right. This is perfect. I love it.” I kiss him gently. “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” he says at my lips. “I saw it, and it fit your personality to a T. I didn’t even look at it for Dani, just so you know. Somehow, I knew it didn’t matter what it looked like, she would want something new.”

It is massive. Way larger than the diamond Hollis gave to me. Comparison is the thief of joy, though, so I block the past from my mind. “It truly is perfect, Tommy. There’s not a thing I would change. How did you know my ring size?”

“I didn’t,” he explains. “It fits because it was always meant to be on your finger.” Tommy slants his head to the side and examines me, eyes flicking over my face rapidly. “Is this a decision you’re comfortable with? Was this too much too soon?” His lashes flutter down, casting a shadow across the top of his cheek.

With one finger, I raise his chin to look at me. “I didn’t know what I wanted or needed before you. I know without doubt that if I loved a thousand lifetimes, I would never meet another man who would be better for me or my soul than you. There is no hesitation in my yes, there is only excitement and relief that forever can begin now.” I sigh when I see his face relax. I shake my head. “This was not too much too soon, and I am completely comfortable with my decision to marry you. I didn’t think this would happen for me…again. I didn’t think I deserved it—that I spoiled my chance with my ex.” At the mention of my ex, the guilt bubbles in my tummy like warm milk.

Tommy’s neck works as he swallows. “This sounds like there’s going to be a but tacked on to the end.”

“But,” I whisper. “I can’t help you make a decision about your career, Tommy. That needs to be only you. What if you make the wrong decision, and you blame me, or there’s resentment, even when there shouldn’t be? I will marry you, and I will be your partner in everything life has to offer, but I wasn’t beside you during your deployment. I didn’t live through that. I don’t know the threshold.” I shake my head. “That’s too much on my shoulders. I won’t say either way.”

“I understand,” Tommy says. “It would be selfish to ask that of you. But I need you to know that you will be a big part of every decision I make.”

Pressing my lips together, I stare in wonder. “You beautiful, soft-hearted man. Sometimes you say things and I question whether this is all real.” He pulls me into a hug. “This is real?”

Tommy presses his lips on the top of my head. “This is date five, Margo. This is more than real. This is it.”

I laugh, covering my mouth with my hand. My ring catches my eye. “It is it, isn’t it? I need to tell you something.”

“Anything in the world. We should eat while we chat,” he says, handing me a bowl of fruit.

I have a bite, then another. “In the interest of preserving this perfect moment, I’ll give you the choice. It’s about Hollis.” I clear my throat. “Do you still want me to tell you?”

“More than ever,” he deadpans.

“I talked to him the day I moved in here. He was only lurking around my old apartment to warn me.” I give him the play-by-play and watch his face change from interest to anger. “I haven’t seen him since. He got his life back in order. I can’t stress enough that he wasn’t part of whatever is going on with the break-in and the notes being left at your place.” I correct. “At your old place.” In hopes of bringing the mood back to where it was before. “I needed to get this off my chest.”

“You told this to Fish?”

I exhale, holding my forehead. “I did, but he was preoccupied with Jeannie. We have dinner with them next weekend, by the way. At my old place.” Another insertion of our new apartment together—a last-ditch effort to swing this around.

“Fish didn’t tell me that,” Tommy grunts. Oh, gosh, what did I do? I should have kept my mouth shut. “Your ex didn’t hurt you?”

“Not a hair on my head. We had a civil, sober conversation about someone who wants you dead. As dramatic as it sounds, he was telling the truth. He paid Nathaniel off to get info on you and me. I already turned in a complaint to HR. I wanted to do it anonymously so they wouldn’t link me to it.”

“And they were going to use you as bait to get to me?”

I nod. “That’s what it sounded like.” There’s a long pause. “Tommy, what is this whole thing about? You have to have some idea at this point.”

His eyes cut to the window, and he loses himself in thought. “I’m figuring it out little by little. You shouldn’t worry about a thing. When I’m sure it’s over, I’ll tell you everything. The less you’re involved, the quicker this will end.” He looks at me. “You feel safe here?”

I nod again. “Especially now that you’re here. Are you mad about Hollis? Don’t be too hard on Fish. He really was logging the hours watching out for me.” The last thing I want is to cause strife in their friendship. “I appreciate everything he did for me.” I dig the burner phone out of my purse sitting next to me and hand it to Tommy. “I don’t need that anymore now that you’re home.”

He eyes it thoughtfully. “Keep it just in case,” he replies. “Do you know if your coworker got canned yet?”

“I took on some of his clients so I’m guessing either they’ve let him go or put him on leave. Everything is tracked, so I imagine it’s going to be easy to see him leaking information.”

“How much money was he paid to lose a job like that? It takes a lot to get in there to begin with,” he muses.

I scoff. “You’re telling me. Hollis said this guy was very wealthy. I bet we’re talking about huge sums of money.”

Admiring my ring again, I ask, “Do your parents know about this yet?” I’m itching to call my mom and yell it from the rooftops.

“They do. This has always been the plan since I asked them for the ring in Texas. I need to make a trip back there to go over some documents.” Tommy cracks his neck. “I have decisions to make, but at least the only one I was worried about said yes.”

Grinning, I lean into him again, the warmth of his body seeping into mine. The electricity of our chemistry hums, igniting the air surrounding us. “Do you want me to go with you?”

“No. I need to go alone. I have time off now that we’re home, so I’ll take a day or two next week, and I’ll be back before you know it.” Tommy clears his throat. “Unless you want to come with me. Of course, you can if you want.”

I shake my head. “Work,” I explain. “All the SEALs getting ready to deploy need me in the gym, and with Nathaniel out, my workload is pretty heavy. Maybe they’ll hire someone else.” Standing, I walk over to the enormous vase of flowers on the coffee table. It’s filled with every sort of yellow flower I can imagine. It’s absolutely stunning. The details of his effort are evident now that I’m not completely enthralled with Tommy asking me to marry him. I brush my finger over a soft sunflower petal and turn to look at him. “How did you know these were my favorite?”

“You have sunflowers drawings on your notebooks you carry around. On date one, I noticed it and made a mental note.”

I laugh. “Maybe that was just the only flower I know how to draw?”

“Lie. I’ve seen your doodles on the notepad you bring into the gym,” Tommy says.

“You really have paid attention from the word go, haven’t you? When we were talking about fake dating, did you really want to fake date me, or did you know even then that this is how it would end? When did you know?”

“When I realized you weren’t as emotionally unavailable as you told me. I fell off a treadmill drunk and knew that whoever you were was what I wanted.”

At the sweet memory, I look back at his words in a new light, and it becomes that much fonder. “I think that’s when I knew I was in trouble.”

“We’re in a legally binding relationship now that we’re engaged so it’s legal on base,” Tommy says, thinking back to how this all began. “I made sure of it the day after I fell off the treadmill.”

I clear my throat. “Take off your clothes, Tommy Towne. We have some unfinished business to attend to right this second.”

The man blushes. “Right here?”

“Did I stutter?” I grin.

He shakes his head, standing. “No, ma’am, you did nothing of the sort.” Tommy is out of his clothes in record speed, standing on the picnic blanket full of untouched food. I spot whipped cream.

“I have an idea,” I announce, getting undressed to expose the black bra and panty set I just purchased for this occasion. His gaze dips to the panties. They’re crotchless, lace, small things that barely cover anything.

He rubs his chin while admiring me. I know it’s admiration because his dick is already at full mast, and his chest is moving up and down quicker. It’s easy to tell when Tommy is turned on. There’s no playing coy with him, what you see is what you get.

Bending over in front of him, seductively shoving my bare ass against his dick, I pick up the whipped cream and kneel in front of him. I peer up at him through my lashes as I spray it on his lower abs, then lower on his cock and balls. “I promise not to bite,” I say as I lean in and take him into my mouth letting the sweetness hit my tongue before tonguing his balls to lick them clean. Tommy’s legs shake a bit when I suck on his dick while fingering his balls. I watch his face. He’s in pure rapture. This will be the third time today, and I am sore between my legs, but the wetness starts the second I witness his pleasure.

“Are you ready for round three?” I ask before taking him all the way down my throat.

He nods, eyes closed, hands in my hair, guiding my head back and forth at the pace he wants it. “I am ready for as many rounds as you’re going to give me,” he rasps, pulling me to stand to kiss me. “Sweet,” he says. “Now lie down.”

I do as he says, teasing my legs open so I get the attention I crave immediately. Tommy settles his head between my legs and presses his tongue against my swollen clit. The warmth spreads throughout my body, a tingling sensation wrecking the last of my inhibitions. I grab his head and press it against my pussy harder. It doesn’t matter how aggressive I am, he’s still gentle, sliding his tongue up my slit at the perfect pace. “I want you inside me now,” I say. “Come inside me.”

He responds to that command straight away. Crawling up my body, putting his mouth over one breast and then the other through the thin scrap of fabric. He pulls the cups down to expose my stiff nipples and sucks each one, swirling his tongue, as he positions himself between my legs. His lips are on my mouth when he slips his cock inside me. He’s girthy and long, so it’s this perfect filling sensation that I can feel all day. His exhale enters my mouth in a hiss of delight.

“I could do this all day,” he murmurs in my ear, fucking me at a slow, punishing pace. “You’re so wet for me. Fuck. I could live here.”

“I want you to live here,” I counter, bucking my hips to give him a deeper angle. His breathing changes, but he thrusts into me, steady and true. I come apart, clutching his back and wrapping my legs around his waist. This orgasm rocks my whole body, my abs shaking with the fury of pleasure. As my waves end, he speeds up for only a few pumps before his hot seed spills in me. I can feel his shaft pulse against my walls, and the sensation drives me crazy. All I want is his pleasure.

I lick his neck and kiss his ear as he rasps sweet nothings into my neck. “Fuck, I love you,” he says, finally saying something I understand.

“I love you, too,” I reply.

“We do have a big problem, though,” he says, catching his breath.

Taking his face into my hands I turn it, so his eyes are locked on mine. “What’s that?”

“You just said I can live inside you, and I don’t think I ever want to leave. Like, I’d starve and dehydrate myself just to fuck you for the rest of my life and not do anything else.”

I laugh, but it’s a mistake, his dick pulses inside me, against my g-spot, and I wince against the delightful sensation. “Do that again,” I moan. He does, and I swear to God I see stars it feels so good. He’s filling me and rubbing against my most sensitive area.

I rock my hips up, and the groan that leaves his mouth is fuel to my fire. “Maybe we just starve and die then, because we’re on the same page.” Another pulse of his dick. “Fuck,” I whisper, and his grin is feral. “Your newly discovered talent is going to drive me mad.”

Tommy leans down and puts his mouth against mine, his tongue mingling against mine in a passionate kiss. I grab his ass when he throbs in me again and make him thrust in and out to bring me to the brim again. I come all over his cock for the fourth time. The sight of my engagement ring urging me on, and on, and on.

Real love feels dreamlike.

The fear of losing this is new and tangible.