Chapter 9 #2
“No, it’s my turn to talk, and yours to listen.
I missed you so fucking much, did you know that?
Even after I left that restaurant, humiliated beyond anything, I couldn’t forget you.
A week later, I came back to that club we met at.
Do you remember the one? Probably not. You’ve probably been to a hundred different ones since then in your travels, haven’t you?
So yeah, I came there, not looking for you, but just to come back to the place where I saw you first. I thought I could feel close to you by going there.
How stupid of me, because what would I find the minute I walked in there, but you, right in the middle of the dance floor, drunk off your ass, surrounded by grinding women, dancing like there was no tomorrow.
That’s what I found. It didn’t take you long to move on, did it?
Two fucking years, Richard, and you moved on like this”, she snapped her fingers at me, her eyes on me, her entire face lit up in anger.
I couldn’t say anything in response. I couldn’t even breathe.
I remember. God, I remember. I was spiraling already, and I thought…
God, I didn’t go there to have a good time.
I went there because I missed her too. But how do I tell her that, and would she even believe me when what she saw didn’t indicate that I was missing her in the slightest? What a fool I was 5 years back.
I finally opened my mouth to speak, but she wasn’t done yet. Of course, she wasn’t, and I snapped my mouth shut.
“I was fucking heartbroken Richard. I was young too, and I was all alone in that city, with no friends, a dead-end job, and now no boyfriend. So, when my mom called, I couldn’t help but tell her everything.
Of course, I did. And of course, she asked me to come back home, and I did!
So two months later, when I found out I was pregnant, did you really think the first thing on my mind was informing you?
And how did you want me to do that, pray tell?
Should I have run behind you all over the European continent, or God knows where else you ran off to, while I was heavy with child?
Are you even hearing yourself? Do you know how hard it was for us?
I had no job, and my parents were minimum wage workers.
Mom had to take a lot of time off to take care of me, and she almost lost her job.
Dad was stretched to the max. They did everything they could to take care of the sudden surge in expenses, and me on top of that.
They helped me through everything, Richard.
They encouraged me to start my business, assured me that they’d take care of the finances and Connor while I was finding my footing.
I worked like hellhounds were after me, and I succeeded, all because of their sacrifices.
And the first chance I got, I retired them.
I bought them a nice house near mine, and I made sure they’d never have to work a single day, ever again.
I did all of that. My parents and I did all of that, after you left me.
So forgive me if I forgot to inform you that you’d sired an heir while I was literally struggling to survive. Your feelings were not my priority”.
“I could have helped”, I started, and I almost wanted to hit myself at how lame that sounded to my ears. How little, after how long.
“I didn’t want your money”, she exclaimed.
“God, I hate when I become like this”, she muttered to herself, and visibly calmed herself down while I watched her with wide eyes, her words swirling in my head, the implications of what she just told me making me feel guiltier by the second.
She suffered so much, and where was I? Having the time of my life.
Sure, I missed her, but my life wasn’t turned upside down.
I wasn’t the one struggling to survive. How could I have done this to her, and now I had the audacity to blame her for not telling me about her son? I’m such a dick.
“See”, she started again, after she’d calmed herself down. “I know you have the right to know about your son. I know I should have told you, but I was in no position to. And frankly speaking, I wasn’t even sure if you wanted to know you had a son”.
“I did”.
“Okay”, she sighed out aloud again. “I believe you. But it’s been a long day for me, and I really want to just take my son back home and let him sleep in a comfortable bed.
Can I do that? Can we pick this up again?
”, she practically pleaded with me, and before I could come up with a response, she was walking away from me, for the second time in my life, and I could do nothing but watch her as she walked toward her mom, picked up Connor, and left the hospital without looking back.
Her words were still echoing in my head. I always wondered how the aimless 25-year-old managed to build a multi-million-dollar business so fast, and now I know. She had good reason to.
I thought I just had to make up for breaking up with her the way I did, and then I thought she owed me something for keeping my son from me.
But now I realize that I owed her a lot more for more than just leaving her.
I have a lot to make up for, to her and my son, and right at that moment, I decided that I will move heaven and earth to do just that.
My family deserved nothing less. And yes, they were my family. They might not welcome me yet, but I’ll do everything I can to make sure they do.