Chapter 14
CHAPTER
FOURTEEN
Flyboy
Therapy was absolutely grueling. I’m fucking exhausted and ready for a fucking shower. I’m even more pissed off that Riley wasn’t there when I arrived. Avery said something about her having a lunch date. My willingness to continue therapy went out the fucking window. Only, Avery didn’t give a fuck and pushed me harder and harder. Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate everything she has done getting me back on my feet and my hand working again.
When we pull back into the clubhouse, the angry cloud that is ever-present over my head lightens ever so slightly when I see her car sitting there. The prospect turns the cage off and opens the door, and that’s when I hear the sobbing. Looking over, I see all the women of the club gathered around someone. The long dark hair and curves I would know anywhere tells me the sobs are coming from the woman that haunts every moment of my being. Reaching over, I grab the crutches that I was approved to use today.
I throw the door open and stumble out, still getting used to them. When I put pressure on my hand it smarts, letting me know that today isn’t the day to continue. Avery’s words rebound in my head.
“You can use the crutches but don’t push it. We don’t want a setback.”
“Prospect, grab my chair!” I shout.
“Thought the lady said you didn’t need it anymore?” he questions me.
“What she said, jackass, was that I could use the crutches but not to overdo it. Seeing as I just got done with therapy, and my hand is in pain, using them now would be overdoing it,” I snarl, totally over this fucker questioning my every move.
He holds his hands up in surrender before doing as I asked him and getting me my chair. I sit in it, reaching down to turn the wheels, making my way over to the group of ladies. The words I hear from my very own Nightingale lights the fire that I thought was put out by the accident.
“They're going to drag me back this time, and I won't make it out. I just fucking know it,” she moans, looking around wildly.
The women gather around her, all of them telling her that’s not true, we won't let that happen. Something about her body language tells me that she's not hearing them. Unable to continue listening to her sob, I move forward, frustrated when I can’t get to her.
“Move,” I demand, shocking everyone there. They all turn to me shocked by my words before moving away from Riley.
When I get a good look at her the anger bubbles free. “What the fuck is going on here?”
Riley looks up at me, tears streaming down her face, with a look of complete shock and fear. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to. I’m sorry.”
Her words are hoarse, stilted and laced with so much fear that I’m not even sure that she is seeing me and not someone else. I roll closer to her, reaching out and cupping her face before I even try to speak to her.
“Riley, baby. What’s going on? Why’re you so upset?” I whisper.
“I can’t be here. I’m so sorry, Flyboy. I never should have stayed as long as I did. I need to leave,” she mumbles over and over just before she stands and tries to leave.
Gently, I grab her wrist, stopping her movements, she turns looking down at me. She watches me, tears racing down her cheeks unbridled. “Please, I don’t want to be any trouble.”
“Oh, Riley. You are never any trouble,” I tell softly. I tug on her wrist a little, pulling her into my lap, ignoring the slight pinch of pain from my injured leg. “Talk to me, baby. What’s going on?”
She looks down at her hands that are twisting in her lap. “Flyboy, please. I truly can’t drag you into this.”
“How about we go inside and take a break. We’ll talk about this later,” I murmur against the side of her head.
“I can’t go in there. There are too many of you. I just can’t.” She shakes her head.
I look around, seeing that everyone has cleared out giving us space. Reaching down with my left hand I grab a hold of the left wheel, pushing it back and forth while holding on to her leg with my right one. A thought hits me. “How about you press your face into my neck and not look. I’ll wheel us into the club and into my room. That way, you don’t ever have to know who or how many people are in there.”
“What about your leg? I’m too heavy to be sitting here to start with,” she mumbles quietly.
“I’m all good.” I smile wide at her. “Are you ready to take a ride?”
Riley gives me a hint of a smile before placing her face in the crook of my neck. I take a deep breath to prepare myself for rolling through the yard and into the clubhouse when Coin comes out the front door. I hold my hand to my lips in a sign for him to keep quiet, and then wave him over to me. I point to the handles and he gives me shit eating grin before heading over to us. Coin quietly pushes me into the clubhouse and down the hall to my room. Once we’re in my room, I shake his hand giving him a nod before he turns and leaves, closing the door behind him.
“Alright, baby, we're in my room. Let's get you comfortable and then I’m going to take a shower.”
Riley pulls away from my neck, looking at me sweetly before sliding off my lap. When she’s standing before me, I take in her appearance. She is as beautiful as ever. Long dark hair falling in pieces from the messy bun she always wears on the top of her head, down her long slender neck, to her large breasts that I know are going to be larger than a handful, her waist flares out, perfect for my hands. I bring my eyes back up her body, taking in the fact that her clothes seem to hang off her as if she's lost quite a bit of weight.
“Riley, baby, what’s going on? You look as if you haven’t slept in months. Hell, you look like you’ve lost half your body weight.” Reaching out, I run the tips of my fingers down her arm, holding her hand.
She sits heavily on the edge of my bed, covering her face with her hands. “Flyboy, please don’t ask me questions that I can’t answer. Truly, I don’t want you or the club involved in anything to do with me.”
I roll closer to her, running my hands up and down her thighs. “I’m already involved, baby. There’s nothing you can say to change this. Please, I can help you. We can protect you from whatever it is that’s putting this much stress on you.”
“That’s just it. Don’t you get it? If you help me, if you or your men are involved, there will be consequences that none of us could ever imagine.” The look on her face tells me that there is way more going on here then I could’ve ever guessed from this petrified woman in front of me.
“How about this? I’m going to go and shower. You get comfortable, and then we can just hang out.” I start, being sure not to make any demands. “Then when you’re ready, we’ll figure out the next step.”
Riley just nods her head. Leaning forward, I place a kiss on her forehead, heat floods my system shooting straight to my cock, which becomes instantly rock hard. Riley leans away from me, searching my face. Her eyes trace over my eyes, down my nose, and stop on my lips. She licks her lips and her eyes heat. I run my hand up her arm, cupping the back of her neck, massaging it softly.
“Riley, I really want to kiss you right now,” I confess, leaning closer to her.
“I wouldn’t say no to that.” She laughs softly, running her hands up my thighs as she leans further into me.
“Baby, I need you to say no. You aren’t in the right headspace for what’ll happen if we were to kiss.” Disappointment flashes in her eyes before she pulls away, folding in on herself.
“I’m sorry. I know I’m not like the girls who normally warm your bed. I know thinking you wanted me was stupid.” Her gaze looks beyond shattered. “I just thought when you brought me in here that you would. Just forget it. You go shower, and I won't bother you with this anymore.”
“Is that really what you think this is about?” I’m trying to clarify that I understand what she's trying to say. “You think that I’m asking you to say no because I don’t want you?”
“Flyboy, let’s just not do this. I can’t handle any more embarrassment today.” Her sadness wraps around her like a cloak trying to hide her away.
Tipping her chin up so that I can look into her astonishingly expressive eyes, I state, “I would give up the ability to walk to be with you.” I swallow hard, trying to find the words to tell this woman I was coming to see her when I was hit without her pulling the guilt of that day onto herself.
“Riley, the night of the accident, I left the wedding because I decided to finally get off my fucking hands, and fight for the one point of sunshine in my life.” Her eyes go impossibly wider with every word.
“What do you mean? Are you saying this is all my fault?” she wonders, looking me up and down.
“No, not at all! You stubborn, amazing, selfless woman, that isn’t what I’m saying. What I’m saying, is that I want you in every way that a man can want a woman. I want to know what’s going on in your life. I want to know what makes you happy and what makes you sad. Why you’re so scared to come into this clubhouse and spend time with my family? Riley, don’t you understand, I want it all with you,” I reply, laying it all on the table.
Before she can say anything, I close my lips onto hers. My hand that has never left the back of her neck, fists in her hair, bringing her closer to me so I can deepen the kiss. I lick the seam of her lips, trying to encourage her to open her mouth to me. Riley opens up for me, meeting my tongue with hers. The kiss lasts for so long that my head starts to spin from loss of breath.
Pulling back, I grin, taking in the beautiful woman in front of me, admiring the blush that spreads from the top of her head, down across her cheeks, leading down into her shirt, making me wish I could see exactly how far the blush goes.
“Fuck, you’re so fucking gorgeous.” I place a quick kiss on her lips before rolling back from her.
“I don’t know about gorgeous but, thank you.” The blush on her face deepens just a few shades darker.
“Alright, I’m going to go take a shower. Then we’re going to lay here and rest. Avery kicked my ass in P.T. today, and I’m fucking beat.” I smile trying to ease her.
“That sounds like the perfect plan. Where is your remote so I can get it all set up?” she asks sweetly, looking around.
“It’s right there on the bedside table next to the clock. That sounds perfect.” I try to turn my wheelchair running into shit all over the floor.
Riley laughs as she stands from her place on the bed. She comes over to me, picking up the items that are in my way before guiding my chair into my bathroom that is also a god forsaken mess. Fuck, what the hell has happened to me? I wonder as I stand from my chair, looking at the man in front of me. My hair and beard are both overgrown and shaggy, all the muscle tone that I built up over my years in the military is gone. Riley comes up behind me, refusing to look directly at me before turning, and starting the shower.
“I’ll help you into the shower to be sure that you don’t fall,” she says, sounding all business, like she would when we worked in the E.R. together.
“Having my own in-home nurse could be very convenient,” I joke as I pull my shirt over my head.
“Could’ve had this the whole time had you not been such a fucking prick,” she grouches as she continues getting the shower ready.
Shame rains down over me like a hurricane. The touch of her hands across the scars on my back tingle, causing me to jerk in response. Riley starts to pull away but I reach out, placing her hands back on my skin.
“You healed so much better than we thought you would. In no time, they’ll be nearly gone,” Riley tells me, then she hesitates for just a second, and asks, “Can I ask you a question?”
“You can always ask me anything.” I tip her face up to look at me. “The only time I won’t tell you something is when it’s club business. You have to understand that club business is just that, business between club members, and no one else.”
Her eyes are open, and I could read everything in them until the moment I mentioned club business. Why would talking about club business cause her to close down like a house party when the police show up? I decide that I’m going to dig information out of her later, but first, I’m going to shower and clean up this fucking beard.
“Thank you, for being honest with me. Why don’t you get in the shower and I’ll have everything ready when you get out?” she asks, chattering absentmindedly as she continues cleaning up the bathroom.
“Riley, what is it? What aren’t you telling anyone?” I inquire.
“Flyboy, there is nothing to tell. I came to this town to start over, determined to never be involved with anything other than my job. Now, I’m standing in a bedroom in a clubhouse, just trying to make sure that you don’t fall on your ass while you shower.” She throws her hands up before turning to leave the bathroom.
I watch the spot where she was just standing, stunned by her outburst. Patting my pockets in search of my phone, growling in frustration when I don’t find it, I make a mental note to text Razor and ask him to dig into Riley to see if I can figure out why the hell she is so set on hiding everything from me. If she won’t tell me what’s going on with her, I’ll just have to find out that information for myself. I start to push my pants down when the fucking brace from my hip to my ankle stops me.
“Fucking, hell!” I grouch.
“What’s wrong? Is everything okay? Do you need something?” Riley quickly fires questions at me in rapid succession from the other room.
“I need to take off my pants and need help doing so.” Annoyance washes over me at once, again feeling motherfucking useless.
“That’s no problem. Are you able to get the brace wet in the shower?” she inquires as she comes back to the room.
“What the fuck do you think I’ve been doing for the last six months? Fucking sitting on the damn sink?” I lash out at her, not liking how I’m feeling.
Riley flinches at my words but doesn’t say or do anything else. “It seems that was a dumb question. Alright, what do you need me to do?”
“Fucking take my pants off. I would think as a nurse you would know how to fucking do that.”
Riley's back goes ramrod straight. “Flyboy, as much as I would like to stay and help you, as well as hang out after your shower, if you keep speaking to me like that, I’ll have to leave.”
Her words are like a slap in the face, reminding me that once again, I’m being a complete fucking asshole. I’m treating her like some nobody, and not like the woman that has wrapped her fingers around my soul, refusing to let go. Making things worse, is the fact that this woman doesn’t deserve an ounce of my lashing out.
With my head hanging, I apologize, “I’m sorry, Riley. You don’t deserve me being a complete dick.”
Riley kneels at my feet, starting to undo and remove the parts of my apparatus that can be removed before reaching up for the waistband of my pants. I watch her, willing my cock to behave. Riley looks up at me, asking with her eyes if she should continue. I give her a stiff nod to continue, leaning back, placing my hands on the edge of the counter, trying to hold myself together. The thought of having her on her knees, removing my pants has been a fantasy since the day she walked into the E.R.
“Alright, let’s have you lean back onto the counter so you don’t put weight on the injured leg as I pull the pants off the good leg,” Riley whispers, as a bright red blush makes its way up her chest, leading up toward her throat, only stopping when it hits her hair line.
I do as she tells me, holding my breath, praying my cock continues to do as I was praying it would. Once the pants are completely removed, Riley stands still, avoiding making eye contact with me. I let go of the counter, reaching out to tip her chin up so I can see her eyes. When they finally meet mine, the fire burning in them ignites the embers that have been simmering for more months than I would like to think about. Slowly, I slide my hand across her chin and then move it around to the back of her neck, squeezing lightly before pulling her to me.
“Riley?” I don’t even know what I’m asking her right now.
Riley trembles at her name and clears her throat, saying, “You need to shower. I’m going to go into the bedroom. Call out if you need anything else.”
Riley turns, rushing out of the bathroom so fast I swear I can see skid marks on the floor. I sigh, rubbing a hand over my face trying to clear the fog she leaves me in. I hop into the shower being sure that the parts of my brace that I still have on stay free from the spray, doing my best not to get it wet. I quickly wash my body and hair before turning the water off. I slide the shower door open, reaching for my towel that usually hangs on the hook just outside the shower. Not finding my towel, I call for Riley. When she doesn't answer, a cold slice of fear washes down my spine.
I step out of the shower, not caring about the towel, just needing to find her and make sure everything is okay. I use the wall for stability as I make my way to the door, only stopping to think about the possibility of falling for a moment. When I make it through the door and into my room, I search for her, finally finding her curled up on my bed fast asleep. My heart starts to beat at a regular rhythm as I find a towel and dry off. Afterward, I search and locate a pair of shorts, and maneuver the rest of my brace into place before crawling into bed next to Riley, hoping it’ll be a night not plagued by nightmares.