Homecoming - Chapter 27
Thursday
Matt
“I know it’s messy,” Kennedy said. “Really messy. But…I don’t know.” She leaned forward, removing her hand from my shoulders. “That’s why it’s complicated.”
Felix ran his fingers through his hair as he just stared at us. “Actually, it kind of all makes sense now. I remember back in school, whenever Kennedy and I were together, you’d come plop yourself in the middle of us.”
“I definitely didn’t do that,” I said.
Kennedy laughed. “You kind of did.”
“What?” I asked.
“Yeah, but I didn’t mind. You were grieving. And I knew you just needed a shoulder to cry on. I wanted to be there for you. Brooklyn would have wanted that.”
“It’s probably the reason why the two of us never got together,” Felix said.
Kennedy laughed. “Well, I think a bigger reason for that was that you didn’t like me, Felix.”
He just stared at her. “What are you talking about? I always liked you, Kennedy.”
She laughed again. “Yeah, right.”
“I’m not joking,” Felix said. “I started talking to you freshman year and then you totally blew me off.”
What the fuck was happening right now? It was like they’d completely forgotten I was even here. And where was Francois when I needed him?
“You tried to sell me drugs,” Kennedy said.
“I tried to sell everyone drugs.” He smiled at her.
“Either way, you clearly just wanted to be friends. I mean, you liked Brooklyn.”
He shrugged. “Yeah, but…I liked you first, Kennedy.”
She opened her mouth and then closed it again. Kennedy was rarely speechless.
I didn’t like this at all.
“Bonjour! I’m Francois!” Nigel yelled.
Thank God.
Kennedy laughed. “Nigel, what are you doing here? And why are you dressed like a waiter from that French restaurant again?”
“I’m not Nigel, Kennedy. I’m Francois!”
“Then how did you know my name?”
“Francois knows all things! I’m Francois!” He pulled out a notepad. “Now you two lovebirds, tell me what you’d like me to serve you.”
Kennedy turned to me.
“He wants to know our drink order,” I said.
“That isn’t what he said.”
I laughed. “I know. But it’s what he meant.”
She turned back to Nigel. “Just bring us whatever wine you recommend.”
“Whatever I recommend?” A big smile spread across his face, jostling his fake mustache.
He grabbed the mustache to keep it on. “Very good, mademoiselle. Very good indeed.” He made sure his mustache was staying in place before he turned to Felix.
“And what will the random gentleman who is clearly the third wheel have?”
“Um…a scotch will be great, thanks.”
“Basic choice.” And with that Nigel turned on his heel and hurried off.
I smiled. Nigel had just brought the sick burns for me. Maybe I’d forgive him for not warning me I’d invited Felix on a romantic date tonight.
“I’m so confused,” Felix said. “Do you guys know that rude waiter?”
“Yeah, he’s a friend,” Kennedy said.
“Francois is your friend?” Nigel asked.
Kennedy jumped.
How had he gotten our drink order so quickly?
“Yeah, Francois . I do believe you are.”
He nodded. “Yes. We are friends. The best of friends. And I have brought my favorite from the wine selection. I hope it’s to your liking, friend.”
Kennedy smiled at him.
And then he pulled a machete out from behind his back and lopped the top off the bottle.
Where the hell did that come from?!
Kennedy clapped for him.
I didn’t think I’d ever seen Nigel so happy. Well, that wasn’t true. He looked like that whenever he talked about drawing me a bath. Or when he discussed fax machines. He finished pouring our drinks and turned to leave.
“Um…where’s my drink?” Felix asked.
Nigel completely ignored him and walked away.
“I’m pretty sure your friend hates me,” Felix said.
Kennedy laughed. “It just takes some time for him to warm up to people. He didn’t like me at first either. He kept throwing water in my face.”
“Are you serious?” Felix asked with a laugh.
“I swear it. And his opinion changes quite quickly. He did that to me just earlier today on the football field.”
“The football field?”
“Yeah, Matt is the head coach at Empire High. And I’m his assistant coach. Oh my gosh, Felix, you should come to the homecoming game this weekend. Matt, are there any tickets left?”
“No,” I said. “I think they’re all sold out.” They weren’t.
“Are you sure?”
I nodded.
“That sucks,” said Kennedy. “I was hoping to grab one for my mom too. She wanted to come see both of us in action. She hasn’t been able to stop talking about it. I should have grabbed them earlier. I really need to stop leaving everything to the last minute. She’s going to be so disappointed.”
Fuck. I didn’t want to not let her mom come.
“There aren’t any strings you can pull?” she asked.
I cleared my throat. “I mean…yeah. I’ll figure something out.”
“For Felix too?”
“Right. I’ll get two tickets.” Damn it. The last thing I needed was for Felix to be schmoozing Kennedy’s mom during the whole game. Really, the last thing I needed was for Felix and Kennedy to hang out again at all.
“Thanks, Matt.” She smiled up at me.
I reached out and tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear.
And this time she blushed for me. I took a deep breath. I was just overreacting. She didn’t like Felix. Sure, maybe she had years ago. But time changed things.
“Can you really imagine marrying her when your heart still belongs to someone else?” Tanner’s words popped into my head uninvited. Okay, fine. Maybe time didn’t change everything.
And Felix was definitely looking at her like his feelings hadn’t changed. Had I really gotten in their way all those years ago? I didn’t even realize I’d been doing that. I just…needed to hang out with someone that understood my pain. I never meant to get in the way of Kennedy’s happiness.
“Are you okay?” Kennedy asked. She put her hand on my thigh.
“What? Yeah, I’m fine.”
“You sure? I think you might have spaced out for a minute there. Felix was just asking what you do. I told him you run MAC International. How all your dreams are coming true.”
I remembered telling Brooklyn that running MAC International was my dream. That Brooklyn was my dream. I’d pictured it all with her.
“You look a little pale,” Kennedy said. “Do you need some water? Where is Nigel?”
“If you’ll excuse me for a moment,” I said. “I actually forgot I have a quick business call I need to make.” I pushed myself away from the table and I didn’t even hear Kennedy’s response. I just needed some air.
I needed someone to tell me that my sadness in high school hadn’t ruined Kennedy’s chance at happiness.
I needed someone to tell me that everything was going to be okay.
I went out the front doors and breathed in the cool autumn air. And then I called Tanner.
It took him forever to answer. Which was highly unusual.
“Hey,” Tanner said when he finally picked up. “I’m a little busy, but I’ll be home in like half an hour.”
“Get out of my head.”
“What?”
I sat down on the curb and put my face in my hands. “I can’t stop thinking about what you said. About if I could marry someone else when my heart still belongs to Brooklyn.”
“Trust me, everything is going to be fine.”
“How could it be? Felix liked Kennedy all those years ago. And I was in their way.”
“Are you spying on their date?”
“No, I’m on their date.”
It sounded like he closed a door. And then his voice was suddenly a little louder. “So you’re doing the same thing you did to them when you were back in high school?”
“But I…” I let my voice trail off. “I really like Kennedy.”
“I thought you loved her?”
“Yeah. I do. I love her. But I can’t stop thinking about what you said.”
“I know,” Tanner said.
“I just…if I messed it up for them once before, I don’t want to be the one that messes it up again. But I can’t turn off my feelings for her.”
“I know.”
“But he sat there and told her that he liked her first. And I can’t ever tell Kennedy that. I’ll never be able to.”
“I know,” Tanner said.
“Stop staying you know. You don’t know.”
“Matt, it’s all going to be fine.”
I didn’t respond. I just stared at the taxis zooming by on the street.
“I promise,” Tanner said. “You just need to trust me.”
I didn’t believe that Tanner was an expert on true love. But I still found myself asking: “You think Felix and Kennedy are a good match? Better than me and her?”
“There’s no way for me to know for sure this soon. But I think there’s a good chance. How did she respond to seeing him?”
“Her eyes lit up. Whereas when she first ran into me again, she kneed me in the balls.”
Tanner laughed. “Very different circumstances.”
“Yeah.” I sighed. “But still.” I turned to look through the window of the restaurant. Felix and Kennedy were laughing about something. Besides for the empty chair next to Kennedy, it looked like the two of them were on a date.
Had I really always put myself between them during high school?
I hadn’t meant to do that.
I hadn’t been thinking.
I just…I’d needed Kennedy.
I still needed her.
“And are you with Nigel? I need his help with something and I can’t get a hold of him.”
I smiled as I watched Francois walk over to our table and sit in my chair. They were all laughing now. “Yeah, he’s here too. He dressed up like Francois again.”
Tanner laughed. “Is he fooling anyone this time?”
“Not even a little bit.” I looked through the window. Nigel had disappeared. But then I saw him walk back up to the table with another glass of scotch. He proceeded to throw it right in Felix’s face.
Kennedy said something to Nigel and they both started laughing. And then Felix started laughing too.
“What’s so funny?” Tanner asked.
I hadn’t realized that I’d chuckled. Serves Felix right. “Nigel just threw a drink in Felix’s face.”
“Why would he do that? He’s only supposed to be throwing drinks when you and Kennedy are misbehaving.”
“Wait, what did you just say?”
“Nothing. You’d think Nigel would be able to pull Francois off better since he’s a born Frenchman. But alas, his acting is subpar. I hope the four of you enjoy the rest of your evening.”
“Watching Felix flirt with Kennedy right in front of me isn’t very enjoyable.”
“I know.”
We were both quiet for a moment.
“But Matt?”
“Yeah?”
“It really is all going to be okay.”
Maybe for everyone else. I could just walk away and let Kennedy and Felix be happy together. But then I’d be alone again.
The autumn wind blew and it was like I could smell Brooklyn in the air.
I’d fallen in love with her in the autumn.
And I’d lost her in the same season.
The smell of fall always made me miss her. It made me feel so much regret.
I stared at the three of them happily laughing through the window. I was pretty sure I’d always be on the outside of happiness looking in.