Homecoming - Chapter 30
Friday
Brooklyn
I shimmied my shoulders and Jacob mimicked me. I laughed as he moved his hips to the beat of the music.
He’d insisted on wearing Tanner’s hat again this morning, and Tanner was right…he looked like quite the gentleman. Minus the nudity.
But as we laughed and danced around the kitchen while I made breakfast, it felt almost normal. Jacob already had his toys thrown all over the living room. And it was like I could feel the love in the air.
I turned up the music. For some reason I had this idea that the louder the music was, the less sad I could be. And so far this morning, it was working. Jacob kept jumping up and down to the beat as I opened the oven and pulled out the cupcake tin.
“Cuppycakes?”
“Kind of.” I pulled an egg bite out of the cupcake tin and plopped it onto his plate. I’d added some extra spices. He seemed fond of Mrs. Alcaraz’s cooking and I wanted him to keep eating something besides sweets. And then I lifted him up onto the stool.
Instead of sitting on it, he climbed onto the counter. He leaned down to inspect the eggs, frowned, and looked back up at me. “Where’s the icing?”
“These cupcakes don’t need icing.”
“They’re muffykins?”
Aw. It had been so long since I’d made him muffins that I’d forgotten his endearing name for them. “No, it’s not a muffin either.”
He pushed it away.
“Just try it.”
“Nooooo.”
I tried to hide my smile. As much as I loved how he drew out the word “no,” I needed him to eat this. I slid the plate back in front of him. And I just stared at him until he finally picked up his fork and took a bite.
His eyes lit up at the punch of flavor. “Más, más!”
“More?”
He nodded his head as he ate another big forkful.
I put another egg bite on his plate and gave myself a mental high five.
“So I have some good news,” I said as I sat down in front of him. “Tanner invited us to a football game tomorrow afternoon.”
“Can I be the running back?”
“Not one we’ll be playing in. Or one on the TV. A real one. In person.”
“Wow.” Jacob’s smile took up his whole face. “I love Abuelo Tanner.”
I laughed. “Yeah, he’s really nice. So you’re excited?”
“Yessie.” He took another bite of eggs.
“And Mrs. Alcaraz is coming over to play with you for a few hours while I run some errands.”
“Where are you going?”
“Just to see a few people.” Since Jacob and I were staying, it was about time I finally faced Matt. And I needed to see my father too.
He pushed his plate aside. “I come with you, Mommy.”
“I actually need you to stay here.”
“Por qué?”
“Why? Well…I’m going to see some people that aren’t really friends.”
His eyes lit up like when he’d eaten the eggs. “You’re seeing Abuelo!”
Shoot. “Jacob…”
“Please, Mommy! I need to see my abuelo!”
“I really don’t think…”
“Por favor!”
“You’re going to see Abuelo Tanner tomorrow.”
“Nooooo. I need to see my abuelo. Por favor!”
God he was so cute when he asked for things in Spanish. And he had been good and eaten his eggs. I was going to be telling my father he couldn’t be a part of our lives, even though we were staying. And if this was goodbye…maybe it was fair for Jacob to see him just this once.
“Please, Mommy.”
“I really don’t know why you want to see him so badly. But…how about I run my first errand. And then before I go to your grandfather’s I’ll come pick you up. And we can go together.”
He nodded. “I get to see my abuelo. Can I see Scarlett too? And zoo?”
“That’s a lot of things for one day. How about you hang out with Mrs. Alcaraz, see your grandfather, and then we order pizza?”
“And then Scarlett and zoo?”
“Those will have to wait until another day, sweet boy.”
“Then pizza and cuppycakes for dinner.” He stuck out his hand like he was making some kind of business deal.
Was that something Tanner had taught him yesterday? It was almost as cute as his broken Spanish. “Deal,” I said and shook his hand. “Now go put some clothes on before Mrs. Alcaraz comes.”
“No.”
“Jacob…”
“I have hat.” He pointed to his hat.
Well, I couldn’t really argue with that.
“Mommy, why is one of the rooms upstairs locked?”
I stared at him. “Which room?”
“The one next to mine?”
“I don’t know, sweet boy. Want to go explore?”
“Yessie!”
I picked him up off the counter and we wandered upstairs.
I still hadn’t looked at all the rooms in the house.
And I’d even slept in Jacob’s bed last night.
I grabbed the handle of the door next to his.
And just like he’d said…it was locked. Son of a bitch.
I really hated locked rooms. I’d need to ask Tanner about that.
***
I hit Kennedy’s name in my phone.
“Hey,” Kennedy said. “How was your limo adventure yesterday?”
“Eventful,” I said as I made my way down the sidewalk to Miller’s truck.
I’d texted her last night to let her know Tanner had found us a place to stay.
Mrs. Alcaraz had brought our bags over today.
We hadn’t brought much. But our trip yesterday had taken care of that.
Jacob pretty much had a replica of his room back home here. “So…where does Matt work?”
“Are you going to see him?”
“Yeah. Jacob wants to stay in the city. And I don’t want to put you in an awkward position any longer.”
“Thank you,” Kennedy said. “He works at his father’s company.”
“Does he?” I smiled to myself. That was what he’d always wanted.
“Well, technically he’s the CEO.”
“That’s amazing,” I said. I was happy for him. Maybe he’d gone after all his dreams after all. Maybe, despite what his friends seemed to think, Matt really was happy. Fulfilled. In love with my best friend. I shook away the thought. That last part was none of my business.
I cleared my throat. “Well, I guess I should get this over with.”
“Good luck,” Kennedy said. “Not that you need it, of course. But could you maybe call me after? To just…let me know what…happened?”
I laughed, even though it was forced. “Kennedy, I promise nothing weird is going to happen. I mean, the worst is that I’m going to slap him.”
Kennedy didn’t laugh. “Okay just…please call me.”
“I will.”
“Thanks,” she said. “And no matter what, just know that I love you. Really, no matter what.”
She was being so weird right now. What did she think I was going to do? Bang him on his desk? She was seriously way off base here. “I love you too.” I hung up as I climbed into Miller’s truck.
I took a deep breath of Miller’s scent that still lingered. Yeah, Kennedy was definitely way off base.
I took another deep breath and pulled the truck away from the curb.
It had been 16 years since I’d spoken to Matt.
Fifteen years since the last time I’d seen him.
This was probably going to be the most awkward conversation of my life.
But I needed him to know the truth. I needed to clear the air.
I’d told Kennedy, James, Rob, and Penny that I’d do this. And I wasn’t a liar.
Matt was the liar.
I shook away the thought. Thinking about that wasn’t the best way to start a conversation.
It didn’t take me long to get to MAC International’s high rise. The commute from the house I was staying in was pretty easy. Not that that tidbit of information mattered at all. This would be the first and only time I’d be visiting Matt at work. Or visiting him period.
Finding a parking space was a whole different problem though. I circled the block twice before a space right out front opened up. I quickly pulled into the spot and cut the engine.
My heart was racing and I willed it to calm down.
This would be easy.
In and out in just a few minutes. I’d just pop in and say, “Hi, sorry about 16 years ago. My father kidnapped me. But then I stayed away because you were an asshole.” Easy peasy.
My stomach churned as I leaned forward to look at the high rise out of my front windshield. The building was intimidating. All metal and glass.
I so badly just wanted to drive away. Just like I had all those years ago.
But Kennedy was my best friend. And Scarlett was Jacob’s new best friend. Which meant in order for Jacob to hang out with her, I needed to do this for James and Rob.
It was easier to think about doing this for other people’s benefit.
Because I really, really didn’t want to do it for me.
I was content with my decision to leave that day when I’d seen Matt in the pool.
I’d made my peace with letting him think I was dead.
And I truly thought it was in everyone’s best interest.
Maybe I should say something more along those lines. Instead of the him-being-an-asshole thing.
I took another deep breath and climbed out of the truck. I slammed the door and walked up to the building.
And when I reached the doors, I immediately turned around and walked back to the truck.
For fuck’s sake. I walked back to the front doors. Then back to the truck. Then back to the front doors. And then I turned around again and ran straight into someone. It felt like running into a brick wall. I fell backward, and he wouldn’t have moved at all if it wasn’t to reach out and steady me.
“Sorry,” said a deep voice. “I wasn’t looking where I was going.”
I knew that voice. I looked up at Matt’s brother.
Mason looked down at me. And blinked. And then he immediately let go of my arms and took a step back.