20. Yeremy #2
My mom clicked her tongue, she sighed dramatically then stood with her hand on her hip.
Her mouth moved but I didn’t hear shit she was saying as I crossed the room.
Casper stood, his broad shoulders casted a shadow against the bookshelf behind him.
He looked me over, his eyes narrowed at my wet cheeks then his eyes roamed up to my trembling lips.
His aura darkened as he licked his lips, his jaws clenched before he spoke.
“It’s that doctor nigga?” His brows bunched together.
“No,” I whispered.
Casper exhaled like he was relieved.
“Well…who the fuck do I need to kill?” He muttered low enough for just me to hear him.
“Bianca—I don’t want you to kill her…she’s just?—”
“Not a real friend. I told you this already baby girl.” He pulled me into him, and I broke down.
I collapsed into his chest like I used to when I was a little girl. I poured my heart out with my sobs and no words.
“I’m fenna go beat that bitch ass! What the fuck she do?” My mom yelled out from behind me.
“She—had—kids—by…” It hurt me too much to finish my sentence.
“She only had one by that sorry ass nigga.” Casper completed my sentence.
I backed away from him in disbelief. Casper stood there calmly; he took his cigar out of his mouth to ash it above his ashtray.
“You knew…didn’t you?” I squinted through my tears as the room seemed to go still.
“You knew everything all along…because you always know shit that you’re not supposed to from not letting me be an adult.” My voice raised higher.
“That bitch was lying to me for years! And you let me continue to be a friend to that bitch! She watched me mourn my man and all along she was mourning him too!”
“Yeah, well he’s a dead nigga now. The problem was fixed. You damn right I knew.” He raised a brow.
The coldness in his tone sliced through me.
“You became hardheaded when you started smelling yourself. You stopped listening.” He shrugged as he placed his cigar down into his crystal ashtray.
“What?” I gasped.
I looked over at my mom, she took a seat and was looking all into her compact mirror. She knew not to step into this conversation; at the end of the day, she was just happy to be here. In the grand house catering to Casper.
Casper stepped closer; his eyes narrowed at me.
“I told you years ago…in this life, you don’t trust people, baby girl.
You test them to see just who the fuck they really are.
You never do what I tell you to do. You trusted her cause she smiled all of these years calling you sis.
You trusted that no good nigga cause he was your first. Then you turned around and left the doctor nigga alone for another nigga that you know that I wouldn’t approve of,” he spat out coldly.
A sharp cramp hit my chest as my stomach dropped to my ass.
“H-he told you?” I asked in disbelief.
“Not yet, but he’s a stand-up type of nigga. He will tell me eventually, but you should know me better than anyone. I know everything there is that I need to know about you, sweetheart.” He chuckled dryly.
“Let me guess…” He clicked his teeth.
“Now you love Sol too.” His words was spoken sinisterly.
“If he wasn’t Raft’s son, that lil nigga would be swimming in the ocean for violating…in a real way.” His words trailed off as a look of recognition crossed his face.
“You gone learn the hard way, baby girl. Daddy hate to see you heart broken. I think it’s time for me to just let you experience it all the way through.
You so quick to be defiant, you think I want to control your every move?
I just wish you could be smarter, open your eyes to the real raw reality of the life that we live. You laid up with a nigga that?—”
“Now wait a minute, Casper! Don’t you hurt her like that. I stand down with a lot concerning you and Yeremy…only because you are a good ass father and a better parent than me in so many ways. Don’t break that girl’s spirit when she is already hurting.” My mom slammed her compact mirror shut.
“Shut the fuck up, Benita! Go up to the room and let me and my daughter talk,” he spat at her, still looking into my eyes.
“Casper, please, let it be. I know how nasty you get when things are out of your hands. I know exactly where this conversation is about to go. How about you console her for ending a well over due relationship with that hoe Bianca,” my mom pressed on with desperation in her eyes.
“Fuck that! She think she got good judgement when the nigga she going behind my back to sleep with?—”
“You asked Sol for a damn favor! Whatever he did that night is because of you! That’s not no G shit, Casper. You speaking up on some shit that shouldn’t be spoken on. If she fucking with Sol, let that nigga tell her.”
“Let him tell me what? Nothing more can hurt me than what I am already feeling right now. So go ahead and say it.” I folded my arms over my chest.
“Casper, let it be. It’s not going to make things better,” my momma warned.
“But it will!” His voice roared.
“I will tell her, so she can stop being so fucking dumb like you! I don’t want her to ever experience some of the things that I’ve gone through and kept to myself!” Casper’s eyes went wild as he stared into my eyes with the coldest look that I’ve ever saw from him.
“The nigga that’s blowing you back out now…is the same?—”
“Casper! You’re going to ruin her!” My mom interjected again, this time she stood to her feet.
My heart rate sped up, as fear enabled me from moving.
“I paid that nigga Sol half a million to run up in you and Ramsey’s rinkie dink apartment and blow his fucking brains out.
Of course, it was after I found out that Ramsey was planning on kidnapping you in order to get ransom money.
He was going broke and owed a lot of people money.
I tried to sit back and let shit play out, let you find out who the fuck he was on your own time since he was fucking Bianca and a couple other hoes right underneath your nose.
I drew the line when word got back that he was plotting on hurting my only fucking child.
It disgusted me further when I found out that he was able to fuck my only child minutes before he took his last fucking breath.
You was sleeping with the enemy. Sol killed him, and if you don’t believe me…
take your ass to his house and search for the necklace and diamond earrings that was snatched off of you. ”
He stepped past me like what he said was nothing, like I was nothing more than a lesson in progress.
“You don’t get to cry about what I let happen,” he added over his shoulder.
“You get to decide what you do with it now.” He stormed out of his study, slamming the door behind him.
My knees buckled just as my stomach turned.
In slow motion, I fell to my knees and dropped my head and shoulders in defeat.
I realized that what Bianca did was just small compared to what Casper let happen on purpose.
I couldn’t be too mad at him because for the most part, I was vulnerable, stupid, and blind.