Chapter 9
CHAPTER 9
Holden
Five years ago…
My hand hurt.
My head hurt.
My neck hurt.
Literally… Everything on my fucking body hurt as I walked up to class on Monday morning.
The sun was blazing, even from behind my sunglasses causing my already pounding head to throb more. I pushed the sunglasses up on my head and I rubbed my good hand over my face, relieved at the feeling of the air conditioning blasting me as I entered the building, even though it was pretty brisk out.
“Holden.” Professor McCay’s surprised voice pulled me out of my pity party.
“Hey professor,” I said. Holy shit. Was that my voice? It sounded like I’d swallowed a fist full of gravel.
“What are you doing back so soon?” she asked as she lowered her voice and crossed toward me.
I snorted. “I’m surprised my dad didn’t tell you to expect me.”
She had the decency to cough sheepishly into her fist. “Yeah, well. He’s been taking some time. Obviously.”
“Obviously,” I repeated.
“You don’t need to come back so soon ? —”
“Finals are in a couple of weeks. Can’t miss those… even with a dead mom.”
She winced this time as though my dead mother somehow hurt her . The other woman.
“I just meant ? —”
“I know what you meant. Unlike you, I don’t exactly want to be near my dad at the moment. School’s the better option. Speaking of, I want to do the show.”
“Holden, I don’t know if that’s a good idea.”
“The entire class has worked so fucking hard for this. They deserve it. Keith deserves it.” Katherine deserves it , I think. “Besides, it’ll be good practice to get a performance under our belts before the Kennedy Center.”
McCay’s brows lifted slightly. She wasn’t one to wear her emotions so readily on her face. Usually.
She gave a slow nod. “Let me make a couple calls right now before class. I’ll see what I can do.”
I left McCay behind and entered the theater, fucking grateful at how dark it was in there and startled when I saw Katherine sitting in the front row.
Several of our classmates were already here, milling around and they all seemed to grow silent watching me as I made the slow walk down the center aisle to where Katherine was seated. She looked up from her script, her blue eyes lighting up when she saw me. “Hey you,” she said quietly. Then those eyes dropped to my hands, her smile fading briefly.
Fuck. I forgot her tea. I grimaced, running my good hand through my disheveled hair.
The morning after I’m back and I forgot to do the one gesture I’d made a point to do every day since the beginning of the school year.
“Oh my God,” I muttered and dropped into the seat beside her. “I forgot your tea. I’m the world’s worst boyfriend.”
Katherine turned her body to face me, eyes roving over my undoubtedly bloodshot eyes and wrinkled clothing. Hell, I probably smelled like a distillery.
Despite all this, she smiled.
That earth-shattering smile that makes my breath seize in my lungs. “It’s okay, Holden. It’s only tea. Actually… I probably owe you a tea or twenty,” she continued lightly, leaning in to whisper in my ear. “Besides… the best gift of all is you calling yourself my boyfriend.”
Oh my God. I did say that, didn't I?
I stared at Katherine, stunned. Boyfriend. The word hung heavy between us, weighty with meaning. Had I really called myself that? It wasn't a label I had consciously claimed, but somehow it had slipped out naturally, like it was always meant to be.
Looking into Katherine's eyes, bright and expectant, I knew she was waiting for me to say something. Waiting for me to confirm or deny what I had so casually proclaimed. A part of me itched to brush it off as a mistake, to pretend I hadn't meant it. Calling myself Katherine's boyfriend made it real in a way that sent butterflies fluttering anxiously in my stomach.
But there was no going back now. The word was out there, floating between us like a promise. A commitment that, despite my nerves, I very much wanted to make.
I reached out and took Katherine's hand, interlacing our fingers. Her skin was soft and warm against mine.
"Yeah," I said, quietly chuckling. "I guess I did call myself that."
Katherine's answering smile was like the sun breaking through the clouds. With that smile, I knew I had made the right choice.
With Katherine by my side, maybe I actually could get through this. Even with my world turned upside down, there were still moments of light I could cling to. Katherine was one of those lights—her smile, her touch, her very presence gave me hope.
She leaned in and kissed me sweetly, sending tingles down my spine.
"I like the sound of that," she murmured.
I pulled her close, reveling in the feel of her in my arms. My girlfriend. It was still new, still a little scary, but somehow it also felt right. Like coming home.
"Believe it or not… so do I.”
Just then, the lights in the theater dimmed, signaling the start of class. Students began taking their seats around us. I noticed a few sideways glances in our direction.
Great. I was like a fucking circus act now.
Step right up and see the boy wonder who lost his mother!
McCay strode onto the stage, clapping her hands together. "Alright everyone, gather round. We have a lot to discuss regarding the upcoming show…"
I smiled to myself as murmurs of confusion and excitement erupted around us.
Even Keith looked confused where he stood off to the side.
“The Kennedy Center show?” Keith asked.
McCay smirked. “No, actually. I decided that we should do a one-night performance next Saturday.”
“What is she talking about?” Katherine asked, leaning in to whisper to me.
“Surprise,” I whispered back and kissed her cheek.
“You all worked too damn hard to not do the show this semester.”
Katherine blinked at me, clearly in shock. “You did this?”
I shrugged. “I wouldn’t say I did it… but I asked McCay for a performance.”
McCay cleared her throat, shooting us a glare before continuing her speech. “The show will count as fifty percent of your final grade. And as an added bonus, I called in a favor with a couple of my good friends. A casting agent from Los Angeles and a couple Broadway directors and casting agents will be coming to see your show. We’re calling it a ‘sneak peek’ before your Kennedy Center performance to help build buzz for all of you, but also for Keith.”
Everyone around us exploded into excited chatter. Everyone except Katherine and I. Instead, she merely held my gaze, tears brimming her eyes. My fingers found hers, giving them a grateful squeeze.
“So much better than tea,” she added, her grin widening. “It’s the best birthday gift I could ever get.”
I blinked at her, surprised. “It’s your birthday?”
She shook her head. “Well, not for a few weeks. It’s actually over winter break.” Another smile spread across her face meanwhile, I felt sucker punched. “Usually my birthdays suck. But you getting this show back on? It’s the best present ever.”
How did I not know her birthday was coming up?
“How could your birthday possibly suck? Birthdays are awesome. Cake. Ice cream. Parties. Presents–”
“When your birthday falls over school breaks, it’s less fun. People are always traveling and they’re more excited for holidays than for you turning a year older.” She shrugged, but there was a hint of sadness in her voice. “And it gets busy at the pub around that time, so my parents are always busy, too. “
“How about this… I guarantee I’ll make this birthday your best ever. I promise.”
Her brows arched. “Another promise? You’re just throwing those out all the time now, aren’t you?”
Before I could respond, McCay clapped her hands, barking at us. “All right! What are we doing sitting around for? Get on your damn feet and let’s run the show!”