Chapter 10
CHAPTER 10
“Get on your damn feet and let’s run the show!” McCay barks from the wings of the theater.
I glance up at Holden where he stands in front of me amidst the scenery. He’s so handsome with his hair and makeup done, he nearly looks like a celebrity.
Hell, I guess he sort of is a celebrity.
But to me, he’s always just been Holden.
I clear my throat. “I missed you last night,” I say as casually as I can. “Did you do anything fun?”
It’s been four days since I spotted Holden with Megan and he still hasn’t uttered a word.
His eyes dart to mine, the corners soft and pensive as I suck in a breath. This is it. He’s going to tell me.
Then, the vulnerability vanishes and a curtain drapes across his expression once more. “Not really. I met with my lawyer about buying your family’s pub, though.” His smile lifts, but doesn’t quite reach his eyes. Not in the same way I saw when he was with Jamie.
“Oh.”
“I think it’s going to work out really well… for all of us.”
I force my face to rearrange into a smile and nod. “I hope so.”
He tilts his head. “Everything okay?”
I clear my throat and nod, looking down at my feet. I’ve never been as good at lying as him. It comes naturally for Holden. A product of being a politician’s son, I suppose. “Yeah. Just… nervous about the show.” Then, in a moment of bravery, I add, “Any luck finding Megan?”
Holden searches my face for a long beat, his eyes scanning mine.
But before he can answer, McCay stalks over. “Enough chit chat! This show will open this week, come hell or high water!”
“Guess we should…” Holden’s words fade and he gestures at the stage around us.
“Yeah. Dinner tonight? After rehearsal?”
Holden nods but before he can say anymore, McCay shouts, “For the love of God, you two, places for act two!”
Reluctantly, I move away from Holden and sit down on the couch where I’m supposed to be when the curtain goes up.
The first moments of the second act are just me, center stage, singing about my betrayal. While normally I’m determined in the song to continue with my lies, this time, it’s different. I can’t seem to help the tingling from my sinuses. Or the tears filling against the bottom of my lashes.
Normally, my blocking for this scene is to circle the apartment, but today, I don’t move. I stay seated on the fake couch. Singing my fake song.
But for once, with real feelings.
On my final note of my song, Holden bursts into the apartment in character. He staggers for a moment when our eyes connect and for the briefest second, it’s not his character standing there before me, seeing me near tears… It's Holden.
With a subtle shake of his head, Zach is back on stage with me. No, not me. Skyler.
Holden takes a step towards me, his eyes flashing with anger. "You lied," he spits out, more pain than anger in his words. "I know about what you’re doing at night. Don't try to deny it."
I stand from the couch. "It's not what you think–"
"Save it," he whispers. "I saw the texts. I know you've been sneaking around behind my back for weeks." His hands clench into fists.
Even with all the lights on us, I can feel McCay’s eyes watching from the front row.
"Zach, please..." My voice cracks. "Let me explain."
But he's past listening. With two long strides he closes the distance between us, grasping my shoulders roughly. I wince as his fingers dig in harder than Holden ever has before.
"Explain how you betrayed me? Made a fool out of me?" His breath is hot on my face. "I loved you, damn it. And you threw it all away."
Tears blur my vision. This isn't just acting anymore. The pain in his voice is real.
"I'm sorry," I choke out. "I never meant to hurt you. It was a mistake, the biggest mistake of my life."
He searches my face, and for a moment I see a flicker of doubt in his eyes. But then his expression hardens again.
His eyes blaze as he stares me down. "Never meant to hurt me?" Holden scoffs. "Well you did. You lied right to my face, pretended like everything was fine between us when it wasn't." He steps closer, looming over me. I shrink back instinctively. "I trusted you," he hisses. "I let you into my life, into my heart. And this is what I get in return?" His lip curls in disgust.
My mouth opens but no words come out even though I know it’s my line. These words, this moment on the stage feels too real.
My cheeks burn with shame and confusion. "Please," I stammer, grasping for the right lines. "Let me explain..."
But Holden cuts me off. "No more lies. I'm done with your excuses."
He turns his back on me and I'm left standing alone on the stage. The lights beat down, suddenly feeling as hot as spotlights interrogating a suspect. I want to melt into the floorboards.
When the scene ends, the lights go black and Holden brushes past me without a word, his jaw clenched. I trail after him hesitantly as he storms toward his dressing room.
"Holden, wait," I call out. He pauses, one hand on the doorknob. He looks up at me, his eyes red-rimmed and miserable.
"You know," he says simply. “Don’t you?”
He doesn’t clarify or ask me to. So I simply nod, still too overwhelmed to speak.
With a sigh, he scrubs his hand down his face.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” I whisper. “I waited for you to tell me that you found Megan and Jamie. You never did. Why would you keep that from me?”
His gaze shifts, guilt edging into something different. Something harder.
“How do you know his name?”
I gulp, realizing my mistake. “What?”
“My so—” He pauses, catching himself. “Megan’s son’s name. How’d you know his name?”
Holden stares at me, his eyes piercing into mine, searching for an answer. I fumble for words, unsure how to respond.
"I...I heard Megan say his name," I stammer weakly.
It’s not a lie.
And not the whole truth. Something Holden is very well-versed in.
Holden steps towards me, his body tense. "There's something you're not telling me."
The nervousness and fear I have over not telling him my whole truth dissolves and anger takes its rightful place. “You’re one to talk, Holden. Some things never change, I guess.”
He draws back like my words have slapped him and I watch a bead of sweat trickle down his temple.
Suddenly a voice bellows from the stage. “What the fuck are you two doing?” McCay shrieks. “Do you even care about this show anymore? This is a run-through for Christ’s sake. Holden, you’re supposed to be on stage !”
Holden and I both startle at the interruption.
“Oh for God’s sake,” McCay rolls her eyes at us. “Is this still about the Megan thing?”
Holden tilts his head at McCay, suddenly the fury I’d seen directed at me, now shifts fully onto her.
Holden stares coldly at McCay, his jaw clenched tight. "You… how did you even know about Megan?”
Laurie rolls her eyes in spite of Holden. “Years ago I found something in your father’s records that he was paying a girl a lofty sum. He told me about her baby and that you never knew and he paid her a ton of money to keep it that way.”
“Did he also tell you that I might not be the father?” Holden says, crossing his arms.
Laurie snorts. “Holden, please. That child is the spitting image of you?—”
“I didn’t say he and I weren’t related . But I’m guessing that when you discovered this paper trail and confronted my father about it, he left out the little detail that the reason Megan and I broke up years ago was because he seduced her. He had sex with Megan to prove some stupid point that she wasn’t trustworthy. That kid might be mine… Or it might be my father’s. He might be your stepson.”
McCay’s eyes widen in alarm and her face goes white. “What? No, I - I didn't realize."
“Of course you didn’t. If you play with fire enough, you’re bound to get fucking burned, McCay,” Holden hisses. His eyes lock onto mine for a moment before he turns abruptly and strides back on stage without another word.
I watch him cross away from us, pacing the stage. With my eyes still on Holden, I whisper, “He doesn’t know the real reason you had Megan and Jamie come here.”
McCay glances at me from the corner of her eye. I didn’t tell him about the headline Missy threatened us with. But if McCay was part of Megan’s appearance… then it means she was in on the blackmail, too.
“Do you hate me that much?” I exhale. “That you would risk exposing your stepson’s illegitimate child publicly? You so badly want me out of this show that you’d risk it all?”
McCay’s jaw twitches. “You don’t have it, Kate. I’ve said it for years. You’re a fine actress. But fine will not make this show a Broadway sensation.”
“Is it really that I’m not good enough? Or is it that your vendetta against me prevents me from being great? Or maybe I remind you of someone? Someone who stole your thunder back in the day?” Keith’s words from years ago in college come back to me. This weird vendetta McCay has because I remind her of the person who cost her her own acting career.
“Funny isn’t it? You worked so hard to prevent me from getting here. Right to this very spot on a Broadway stage. But after opening night? You’re going to have to admit you’re wrong. Because I’m going to blow everyone away. And you? You’re still going to be married to the man who lies to you and keeps secrets. You’re still going to be the senator’s second wife.”
McCay lets out a humorless laugh. “Easy there, Kate. You might actually develop a spine after all these years.”
“Oh, I have. And it’s all thanks to you .”
I let out a shaky breath, my heart pounding as I turn away from her and head for the stage.
This conversation isn't over. But for now, the scene calls me back to my mark. I smooth my hair and clothing, trying to regain composure. As I walk onstage, McCay follows behind, shouting out, "Get your head in the game, places please!"
I nod and move into position, avoiding Holden's piercing gaze. The lights dim, but my focus is shattered.
Holden avoids looking at me, his jaw tight.
"We'll talk later," he mutters just as the lights come up and the scene begins.
A declaration. A threat.
Not a request.
But I’ll be damned if I let him get the last word. “Yes,” I say. “We will.”