Chapter 7
The Lennox Residence
It had been weeks since we buried my brothers, but I was far from being over this shit.
I woke up every morning with my pillow damp from crying in my sleep, and it didn’t matter how many times I washed my face, the grief stayed on me like a stain.
Rioh and Jaqwon were dead, and it felt like pieces of my body had been lowered into the ground with them.
Every night, the same nightmare played over in my head.
I would see them walking towards Kay’Lo’s shop again, and right before the gun went off, I would wake up with my heart pounding and tears running down my face.
Sometimes I woke up calling their names, like I could pull them back if I screamed loud enough.
Other times I saw their bodies on that pavement and I felt myself break all over again.
No matter what angle my mind replayed it from, the ending never changed.
My brothers were gone because of me, and no amount of lying to myself could swallow that truth whole.
I told everyone that Kay’Lo had been stalking me, that I had gone to his shop to tell him to leave me alone, and that Rioh and Jaqwon were just there to keep the peace.
That was the story, and that was what I said every time someone asked, but I knew the truth like I knew my own name.
I sent them there with my stupid ass pride and my jealousy hurting worse than my common sense.
I pushed and poked at a man who clearly wasn’t like anybody I ever played with before, and I did that shit without thinking about the world he came from.
I thought I was untouchable because of who my father was, and now every time I closed my eyes I saw the price of that lie.
I found myself scrolling through Toni’s Instagram from my burner account again, even though every time I looked I ended up feeling like my chest was being crushed.
That bitch posted him every day like she was proud of backing a killer.
It was always: Free him. Bring my husband home.
I miss you, baby. She posted pictures of her and Kay’Lo smiling, and all it did was make my anger twist into something dark and ugly.
She had a whole life with him while mine felt cracked down the middle.
I hated her for still having him, and I hated myself for wanting him at one point, even though I knew he belonged to her.
But I couldn’t bring myself to admit that sleeping with that nigga was the start of this disaster.
I couldn’t say out loud that maybe the karma was mine to carry.
My eyes were burning again, so I grabbed my keys. I needed to be with my family, and breathe somewhere familiar.
The drive to my parents’ house felt long even though it was barely twenty minutes. The deeper I went into our neighborhood, the heavier everything got. All the houses looked the same, but ours felt colder now, like grief had soaked into the walls and refused to leave.
My oldest brother, A’Mii’s car was parked crooked in the driveway. He always parked like that when he was feeling reckless. I parked behind him and took a slow breath before going inside. I could hear the low murmur of my father’s voice before I even reached the hallway.
I walked toward his office, and when I stepped inside both of them turned toward me.
A’Mii sat on the edge of my father’s desk with his arms crossed and his face stuck in that permanent mug he always had when something bothered him.
He looked like he was ready to fight whoever stepped foot wrong in his path.
My father was behind the desk with papers scattered everywhere.
His suit jacket was off, and his tie was loosened like he couldn’t breathe properly in it anymore.
To the press he looked calm and composed, but right here in front of us he looked hard and cold and tired in a way I had never seen before.
His eyes were red from rage that had been simmering inside him since the day my brothers was killed.
I walked over to him and wrapped my arms around his shoulders. He didn’t hug me back at first, but then his hand came up and gripped my arm like he needed the touch to hold himself together.
“You okay?” I whispered.
“No,” he answered, and his voice was low and flat, like he didn’t have the strength to pretend anymore.
I pulled back and looked at him. “Daddy… you gotta rest. You’ve been carrying this whole case on your back.”
He stared past me like he didn’t even hear the words, then he finally exhaled slow. “Kay’Lo Mensah is not walking free. I don’t care what strings that family pulls. I don’t care who they intimidate or what tricks they try to play. He killed my sons. He will pay for that.”
A’Mii nodded beside him. “He not makin’ it out of this.”
There was a coldness between them that made me feel like I was standing outside myself. For a second I wished I could run back weeks ago and undo everything.
My guilt must have shown on my face because my father’s eyes narrowed at me. “What is it?”
I swallowed hard. “Daddy… maybe I should just be honest about everything. I feel wrong. I feel like… I feel like I started all this.”
A’Mii sat up straighter, his eyes cutting toward me like I had just cursed at our entire bloodline.
My father leaned forward slightly. “Echo. Stop. Right now.”
“Daddy—”
“You are not saying anything different from the story we already settled on,” he said firmly. “Do you hear me? You went to the shop to tell him to leave you alone. He was stalking you and making you uncomfortable. Your brothers went with you to calm the situation. He shot them without provocation.”
“But that’s not the full truth,” I whispered. My voice cracked even though I tried to hold it together.
He slammed his hand on the desk, not loud enough to scare me but enough to make the air feel tighter. “The full truth does not matter in court. What matters is what can be proven, and I have made sure that every angle that suggested otherwise has been removed.”
My stomach twisted.
“Certain footage from that motherfucker’s shop will never see the light of day. The cameras will show exactly what the prosecution needs them to show. Kay’Lo Mensah was the aggressor. He escalated. He shot. He killed.”
A’Mii smirked with his arms still crossed. “Good. Fuck him. He took Rioh and Jaqwon from us. He gon’ pay for that.”
I looked between the both of them, and the room felt smaller. They didn’t look unsure or guilty. They looked determined. They looked ready to bury Kay’Lo under a lie that I had created with my selfishness, and I didn’t even know how to stop it.
My father leaned back in his chair. His voice got lower, like he was talking to himself as much as to us.
“The Mensahs don’t fight fair. That woman…
Abeni… she moves like she owns the whole island.
She plays dirty. She always has. So now I have to play dirtier.
I have to take everything from them before they take everything from us. ”
He rubbed his face, and for the first time I saw his grief mixed with the rage. “Your brothers deserved better than this, and that man deserves to die for what he did.”
His words should have comforted me, but instead they made my guilt rise up again.
I knew he wasn’t wrong for wanting justice, but I also knew I was the reason this case existed.
If I hadn’t been fighting with that bitch Toni…
if I hadn’t even gave Kay’Lo a second thought when I first laid eyes on him…
if I hadn’t wanted to hurt somebody because my pride was bruised… none of this would have happened.
But every time my guilt tried to speak up, my anger rushed right behind it.
A picture of Toni flashing her ring or posting her lil’ captions would pop into my mind and remind me why I hated her in the first place.
She had everything I wanted. She had the life I thought I could take a piece of, and she never let me forget that I didn’t belong in it.
She was still posting her free Kay’Lo pictures like her husband didn’t murder my blood.
She stood next to a killer and smiled like she had won some battle.
Every time I saw her face, resentment swallowed my guilt whole.
I turned to A’Mii and he nodded at me like he already knew what I was thinking. “He gon’ pay for what he did to our family,” he said. “Ain’t no reason for you to feel bad about none of this. You didn’t pull the trigger, Echo.”
My father added, “You are not responsible for the actions of a violent man. Let go of that part. Focus on the truth we created. It protects you. It protects this family, and it ensures justice is served.”
I nodded slow because that was what they expected from me, even though part of me knew we were building this whole case on something twisted and crooked. But I couldn’t carry the guilt and the resentment at the same time. One of them had to win, and right now resentment was stronger.
Kay’Lo Mensah took my brothers from us. I might have created the fire, but he poured the gasoline and lit the match, so if my father wanted to twist the truth to make sure he never breathed free air again, then maybe that was what needed to happen.
I felt myself breathe a little easier, not because I believed the lie, but because the pain in my father’s eyes made me want revenge more than I wanted redemption.
And if burying Kay’Lo meant my family could breathe again, then that was the only justice left for us.